Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

November, 2007

M-1 Global: Still Nothin’


From time to time, I like to check out the M-1 Global website to see what’s new with the fledgling, Fedor Emelianenko-mascoted organization. You’d think they’d be hustlin’ non-stop to build buzz, and making regular announcements to maintain the heat created by their first press conference last month. But the website has only posted one piece of “news” since then — a rundown of M-1′s global management team. It’s encouraging to know that while they still haven’t formally announced the signing of any fighters besides Fedor, Joost Raimond will be responsible for directing day-to-day operations in Eurasia.

But at least their franchise player is keeping somewhat busy.


Kimbo Slice drops Bo Cantrell “Like Names at a Hollywood Party”

Kevin “Kimbo Slice” Ferguson is an intimidating son-of-a-bitch. Still, there’s no excuse for what happened Saturday night at EliteXC: Renegade. Kimbo’s “opponent,” Bo Cantrell — a late replacement for the injured Mike Bourke — came into the fight completely psyched out, and after a couple of glancing shots from Kimbo, he dropped to the mat and started tapping for mercy. You have to watch the video to see just how pussified it was:


EliteXC X-Girl Tanya Kaufmann Sez…

“Don’t forget to watch Kimbo Slice tear some poor cracker apart on Showtime tomorrow night at 10 p.m. ET/PT!”


Will do, Tanya. By the way, you’re easily the hottest Jewish girl we’ve seen all week…


UFC to Go After the Coveted ‘Old as Hell’ Demographic?


It looks like some scabs will be crossing the WGA picket line after all — specifically, the ones on Forrest Griffin’s face. CBS, the network responsible for such quality programming as The Unit and Shark, could be making a further committment to MMA with one or two UFC-related prime-time specials. The Los Angeles Times has reported that CBS is in negotiations with the UFC, and hopes that these specials could provide a hedge against the ongoing writers strike.

If you’re wondering how the UFC could arrange this so soon after negotiating an exclusive contract extension with SpikeTV, keep in mind that 1) the UFC is exclusive to Spike only in the cable market, and can pursue other opportunities in network television, and 2) both the CBS Corporation and SpikeTV’s parent company, Viacom, share Sumner Redstone (pictured above) as their Chairman. And if you’re wondering how Redstone’s hand got so jacked-up, click here and scroll down to “interesting facts.”


Chuck Liddell + Morning Show + Cough Syrup = : (

The drug abuse continues at CagePotato…

This went down back in March, so apologies if you’ve seen it already, but I just came across the clip of Chuck Liddell’s disastrous appearance on Good Morning Texas, where he was promoting, of all things, the movie 300. Liddell slurs like a stroke victim through the entire excruciating segment, calls out boxer Tommy Morrison for a fight, and at one point falls asleep. Live television, people:

Afterwards, Liddell claimed he was suffering through a sinus infection and had taken a large amount of cough syrup the night before. (In Texas, they call that purp or drank.)

Host Gary Cogill gives his post-interview thoughts here. “What a day in television…what a day.”


Female MMArtist Makes History!


Jennifer Tate has become the first female MMA fighter to test positive for drugs. Results of a drug test administered during EliteXC’s “Clash at Chumash” event — where Tate was submitted by Shayna Baszler via armbar — showed that Tate had marijuana in her system; she has been suspended for three months and fined $500. The spunky 130-pounder joins such notable mixed martial artists as Nick Diaz, Kazuhiro Nakamura, and Diego Sanchez in the previously male-dominated fraternity of fighters who can’t resist taking a few bong rips before a match. Viva equality!


The Top 10 Worst MMA Nicknames Ever

#10 (tie): Chris “The Polish Hammer” Horodecki & Peter “The Dutch Lumberjack” Aerts

Though it has a long, proud history, the nationality + noun combination is always a risky move when crafting a nickname. If it’s “The Polish ____” it can end up sounding like the setup to a joke. (i.e., “You hear the one about the Polish Hammer? They use it to pound fingernails.” Or something like that, but much funnier.) With any other nationality, like “The Dutch ____,” it can end up sounding like a deviant sex act. Marcus “The Irish Hand Grenade” Davis gets a pass because hand grenades are badass.


Rashad Evans Knocks Sean Salmon the Eff Out at UFC Fight Night 8

Before he fought Tito Ortiz to a draw at UFC 73, Rashad “Sugar” Evans scored his tenth consecutive win by way of a nasty high kick against Sean Salmon. As Joe Rogan so eloquently puts it, “WOOOOOOOOOOW!”

Note to Michael Bisping: Your strategy against Evans at UFC 78 should closely reflect this classic Wu-Tang jam.


Riddick Bowe to Follow in Ray Mercer’s Footsteps…


Sherdog reports that former undisputed heavyweight boxing champion Riddick Bowe has his eyes on an MMA career. The 40-year-old currently retired fighter wants to be the first man to hold major titles in boxing and MMA simultaneously. (Coincidentally, I want to be the first man to win both a Nobel Prize in literature and an AVN Award for “Best Male Newcomer.”)


Sean Sherk’s Appeal Hearing Delayed Again


Remember how we told you that Sean Sherk’s appeal hearing for his steroid case was postponed until November 13th? Well, it’s been postponed again, this time until December 4th. Man, you thought Dana White was pissed before

Sherk’s lawyer in the case is Howard Jones, who has advised many other high-profile athletes in doping cases, including sprinters Marion Jones and Tim Montgomery, and Tour de France winner Floyd Landis. Basically, what Johnnie Cochran is to double-murder, Howard Jones is to steroids — sure, it looks a little suspicious when you hire him, but as Chris Rock once said, “I’d rather look guilty at the mall.”