(I like French films and long walks on the beach.)

“Strikeforce at the Dome” is slated to go down in Tacoma, Washington on February 23rd. Headlining the event is Bob “The Beast” Sapp, but an opponent hadn’t been announced until now. It’s going to be Jan “The Giant” Nortje and his 1-5 record. The Giant is 6’10″ and weighs around 330 pounds. Sapp is 6’6″ and 360 pounds. You do the math.

The super-heavyweight fight will be part of Strikeforce’s first event outside of California. It’ll be a home field advantage of sorts for The Beast, who was a great offensive lineman at the University of Washington. His NFL career wasn’t as memorable. Even though he isn’t opposed to crying during a fight, Sapp is hugely popular in Japan. His last fight was against Bobby Ologun in Osaka on New Year’s Eve, which he won via TKO. And he is already very familiar with Nortje – the two used to be training buds.

Nortje’s MMA career hasn’t gone as well as his boxing career. He’s 10-0 as a professional boxer, but last won an MMA fight back in 2002. The Giant was quoted as saying: “I’ve always seen Bob get big opportunities, so I think it’s my turn to show what I can do against him.” Nothing like a 1-5 record to back that up.

But who does Bob Sapp want to fight next? Wait for it…Fedor Emelianenko.

Ending in one of UFC 80′s six KO/TKOs, the fight between light heavys Alessio Sakara and James Lee was by far the stupidest match of the night, with Lee’s relentless pursuit of Sakara’s leg actually drawing laughs from the crowd. We predicted this one to end with Lee submitting Sakara, but we didn’t plan on Lee throwing out his back. Slapstick comedy ensued. Check it out before the UFC goes on its inevitable video-pulling spree.

Maybe you’ve never really noticed the IFL‘s logo; that’s understandable. But it used to look like this:

And now, as announced in a press release sent out this morning, the IFL’s new logo for 2008 will look like this:

Exciting. IFL CEO Jay Larkin and Bas Rutten will be conducting a conference call on Wednesday to discuss this and other changes for the 2008 IFL season (wait, there’s more?!?). We’ll tele-commute to it and give you a full report afterwards.

Speaking of logos, remember that really, really, really lame watercolor abortion that LeRoy Neiman designed to be WAMMA’s official logo? It looks like more prudent heads prevailed, and they decided that steel plating and lightning was a more accurate reflection of the sport. Personally, we think a logo based on these would be even better.

(“Thess! Ezz! SPARTA!!!”)

With UFC events popping up at an alarming rate, matchmaker Joe Silva has been working overtime to fill the cards with talent. We can barely keep up with the announcements and rumors that have surfaced in the last few days, but here’s the important stuff:

— Poppin’ off in Columbus on March 1st, UFC 82: “Pride of a Champion” will reportedly feature the return of Andre Arlovski, who has been in a contract dispute with the UFC since his decision win over Fabricio Werdum in April 2007. His opponent is likely to be Jake O’Brien, a 10-0 heavyweight known for his dull decision victories. Also scheduled to be on “PoaC” card is Diego Sanchez — who won 17 straight fights before dropping his last two to Josh Koscheck and Jon Fitch — taking on 12-6 Brazilian Roan Carneiro, in a fight tailor-made to get him moving up the welterweight ladder again. No more Sonoma, no more excuses.

— Speaking of Fabricio Werdum, the Chute Boxe brawler has parlayed his one-fight win streak into a title shot. Dana White has confirmed that Werdum will face the winner of UFC 81′s Tim Sylvia/Minotauro Nogueira match for the interim heavyweight title, assuming that Randy Couture turns the fight down. The sad part about this situation is how logical it is. Even though Werdum has looked very underwhelming in his two UFC fights, the only other UFC heavyweights who are equally qualified to challenge the belt are Cheick Kongo (and that’s if he beats Heath Herring in March) and Andrei Arlovski (and God help me if I have to sit through a fourth fight between the Pitbull and the Maine-iac). The Octagon’s remaining heavyweights are all either too inexperienced or are coming off losses. To that end, the UFC is wisely looking toward signing new 206+ talent, and have just picked up 8-0 prospect Shane Carwin, who has dominated competition in regional promotions like Art of War and Ring of Fire. Carwin has previously fought as a super-heavyweight but will drop to 265 for the UFC.

Randy Couture and Fedor Emelianenko met for the first time on Friday for an Affliction commercial shoot that also included Georges St. Pierre, Quinton Jackson, boxer “Sugar” Shane Mosley, Eagles defensive tackle Mike Patterson, and, unbelievably, Megadeth’s Dave Mustaine. HDNet’s Inside MMA was on hand to capture the action:

So, good video, but we could have probably used a little more fake sweat. The Fight Network has more on the shoot here, reporting that the whole thing was one big love-fest, which culminated in the fighters exchanging phone numbers and vowing to hang out again real, real soon. Could there be wedding bells for this beefy bear-pair? We’ll stay on the story and let you know when we hear more. Until then, keep it off the record, on the QT, and very hush-hush!

UPDATE, 12:15 p.m.: And here’s the poster…

(Gono won’t be doing the ‘airplane’ at UFC 82.)

As UFC 80 was the focus of the MMA world this weekend, UFC 81 & 82 saw some adjustments to their cards. On Friday, Akihiro Gono announced on his personal blog that a hand injury is forcing him out of UFC 82 against Jon Fitch. Here’s the message (unedited):

I have a pain in my righthand from November(UFC debut fight)
So I could not train enough
I wondered it,Doctor checked my hand again,and This condition was so bad,
Doctor ordered me to stop fight and all training.
And operation is done. maybe in Junuary
I am verry sorry,my fans and John Fitch……..
I will annnounce operation schedule and come back time

Gono, an eccentric welterweight, debuted for the UFC back in November when he beat Tamdam McCrory via a second round submission. It is not clear who will replace him against Fitch since many of the top welterweights in the division have fights already booked or have fought too recently to accept another so soon.

(Paul Taylor bashes Paul Kelly during their “Fight of the Night.”)

Things are tough all over, I guess. The UFC released its customary bonuses after UFC 80, but each one was only $35,000, a full $20,000 less than the bonuses handed out after UFC 79. This is the first time we can recall that the bonuses actually went down from one event to the next. We knew European expansion was a bitch, financially speaking, but it’s unfortunate that the fighters had to tighten their belts to recoup some of the costs. Anyway, here’s who got the extra cash:

Fight of the Night: Paul Kelly and Paul Taylor. Each Brit got $35k, primarily for the insane brawl that kicked off the first round; after that, it was fairly dull GnP domination from Paul Kelly, who won a unanimous decision.

Knockout of the Night: Wilson Gouveia earned $35k for his out-of-nowhere comeback blast of Jason Lambert.

Submission of the Night: B.J. Penn collected $35k by default for his rear-naked-choke of Joe Stevenson, UFC 80′s only tap-out.

Thus, I went 1-3 in my predictions. And commenter MattyLight owes commenter Olie $5. (Sorry buddy!) Feel free to work out the exchange in the comments section.

MAIN CARD
BJ Penn def. Joe Stevenson via submission (rear-naked choke), 4:02 of round 2
Fabricio Werdum def. Gabriel Gonzaga via TKO (punches), 4:34 of round 2
Marcus Davis def. Jess Liaudin via KO (punch), 1:04 of round 1
Wilson Gouveia def. Jason Lambert via KO (punch), 0:37 of round 2
Jorge Rivera def. Kendall Grove via TKO (punches), 1:20 of round 1

PRELIMINARY CARD
Sam Stout def. Per Eklund via unanimous decision — this was the only untelevised fight
Alessio Sakara def. James Lee via TKO (punches), 1:30 of round 1
Paul Kelly def. Paul Taylor via unanimous decision
Antoni Hardonk def. Colin Robinson via TKO (punch), 0:17 of round 1

I just have to know — CAN, YOU, *FEEEEEEL* IT!!!!!!!(?)

You know how this works. Click the “MORE” link and refresh the page every few minutes to get the latest updates on UFC 80: “Rapid Fire,” which comes to us live from Newcastle, England. All times ET.

This liveblog is brought to you by Negra Modelo and Debbie’s Killer Wings.

(Sure, his ground game is solid, but what about his stamina?)

(Not funny.)

— Bas Rutten starred in the best YTMND page of all-time. (last link)

— MMA Girl Joanne enchanted us with an exclusive video interview.

— We got overly emotional about Gina Carano.

— EliteXC signed two members of the Shamrock family. Unfortunately, neither one was Frank. We marveled at Ryan’s physique and gave Ken some encouragement.

— The UFC filed a lawsuit against Randy Couture. Your move, Natural.

— We solicited your predictions for the Kimbo Slice/Tank Abbott fight, then liveblogged their press conference.

— We counted down the best fights that didn’t take place in a ring or cage.

— We put $1,000 up for grabs in the Serious Pimp t-shirt design contest.

— Instead of predicting UFC 80‘s winners, we predicted the bonuses. (Reminder: Come back tomorrow at 3 p.m. ET for the UFC 80 liveblog. Good times guaranteed.)

— We coped with a slow news day.

Have a great weekend, people. Stay hungry.

Photos taken at today’s UFC 80 weigh-ins, courtesy of UFC.com.

Arianny has never felt comfortable around Colin Robinson.

She lusts after Liaudin…

…pities poor Per…

…and was absolutely sure that Marcus Davis was going to make weight — like, sure of it.

Discussing Ken Shamrock’s recent loss history inspired us to dig up the video of his first-round loss to Kazushi Sakuraba, which went down at PRIDE 30 in October 2005. And watching the video reminded us of something we love/hate about Ken — his constant protest of early stoppages. Dude, maybe the refs wouldn’t step in so often if you could get hit without looking like you’ve lost consciousness. It’s a tough skill to learn, but an important one nonetheless.

Everyone else in cyberspace has weighed in, so it’s time for CagePotato to lay down the Chuck Norris law. ‘Cept we’ve not only collected Chuck Norris facts from the site that started it all, but we’ve also scoured the literally hundreds of off-shoot entries around the web. The man who put the MA in MMA may not like the facts much, considering the lawsuit he’s taken out – as reported by our peeps over at Holy Taco a few weeks ago – but we fucking love them. Love him or hate him, Chuck Norris walks above us, not amongst us.

So while the bearded ass-kicker is busy selling loco for Mike Huckabee, enjoy the definitive Top 25 Truths About Chuck Norris…and his beard:

25. Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.
24. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
23. Who was the ghost writer on “Smack My Bitch Up” performed by the band, Prodigy? Chuck Norris.
22. The Ultimate Fighting Championship doesn’t use its full name, which is “Ultimate Fighting Championship, Non-Chuck-Norris-Division”.
21. Chuck Norris once fathered a shark – because they kick ass.

20. Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
19. Chuck Norris is the only person to ever win a staring contest against Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder – at the same time.
18. Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
17. Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet…until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked her into a glacier.
16. Chuck Norris’ first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors.

According to Brock Lesnar in this new promo video for UFC 81, the outcomes in pro wrestling “may be pre-determined.” (!!!)

Dude, you’re going to break this guy‘s heart. Check out 81.ufc.com to see the rest of Lensar’s interview, as well as an interview with Frank Mir in which the former UFC heavyweight champ discusses his gameplan against Lesnar and the motorcycle accident that nearly ended his career.

Oh, and also? Lesnar isn’t really a big fan of the gays. Which is surprising coming from a guy with a big schlong tattooed on his chest.

Related: If you haven’t already taken the new poll on our homepage (“Brock Lesnar vs. Frank Mir — who takes it?”), please do so now.

(Yeah, but what happens when Cage Rage dumps your ass?)

According to The Fight Network, Ken Shamrock’s manager has confirmed that “The World’s Most Dangerous Man” will face Robert “Buzz” Berry during his Cage Rage debut at London’s Wembley Arena on March 8th. Berry fights as a heavyweight, and we’re guessing the match will be fought within that division. Here’s the rest of what we know about Berry:

— His record is 11-7. He hasn’t beaten anybody we’ve heard of, but he’s lost to Tengiz Tedoradze (twice), Dan Severn (last year), and his last two matches resulted in TKO losses against Colin Robinson (who will face Antoni Hardonk in the undercard of UFC 80) and Neil Grove (who is also on the Cage Rage 3/8 card), a loss which he later blamed on fatigue due to a severe chest infection.

Start gathering the beer and microwavable pizza rolls: “Rapid Fire” goes down tomorrow night in Newcastle (3 p.m. ET, noon PT). We’ll be liveblogging the event with round-by-round updates, so be sure to swing by if you don’t want to shell out the money for pay-per-view.

Speaking of money, we’d like to be the first in the MMA blogosphere to make official predictions on who will be taking home the UFC’s traditional end-of-night bonuses, which were a hefty $50k/apiece at UFC 79. To refresh, here’s the lineup:

MAIN CARD
B.J. Penn vs. Joe Stevenson (lightweights)
Gabriel Gonzaga vs. Fabricio Werdum (heavyweights)
Marcus Davis vs. Jess Liaudin (welterweights)
Jason Lambert vs. Wilson Gouveia (light heavyweights)
Kendall Grove vs. Jorge Rivera (middleweights)
PRELIMINARY CARD
Antoni Hardonk vs. Colin Robinson (heavyweights)
Paul Kelly vs. Paul Taylor (welterweights)
James Lee vs. Alessio Sakara (light heavyweights)
Per Eklund vs. Sam Stout (lightweights)

Fight of the Night: Expect a relentless, violent war from Marcus Davis and Jess Liaudin. Not only are both men total sluggers, but they’re both riding significant win streaks that they’ll want to protect at all costs. One more win for Davis and he’ll start getting higher-level competition. One more win for Liaudin and people will finally know who he is. And it’s never a good idea to bet against Kid Bonus. Dark horse: Gabriel Gonzaga and Fabricio Werdum, if they’re firing on all cylinders tomorrow night. Both are coming off of terrible performances in embarrassing losses, and are looking to prove themselves. As for the main event, we see it going one of two ways: Penn wins by early submission (likely), or Stevenson grinds out a relatively boring decision (somewhat less likely). Either way, it won’t be Fight of the Night.

Submission of the Night: Penn, probably. Though if he beats Stevenson with just a simple armbar or rear-naked without any flash to it, the bonus may go to James Lee, a King of the Cage veteran who’s making his UFC debut at “Rapid Fire.” In his last 11 fights, Lee has racked up 10 wins with one no contest, and nine of those wins have been by submission. Known primarily as a boxer, his opponent Alessio Sakara will almost certainly be eating a tap-out loss.

Knockout of the Night: They don’t call him “Hands of Stone” for nothing. Though Sam Stout’s UFC record has been spotty, he was known for his knockouts in the Canadian MMA organization TKO, and we see him coming out on top of Eklund. Dark horse: Gabriel Gonzaga. If he could murder Cro Cop with a headkick, he could do it to anyone.

Make sense? Shoot us your own predictions in the comments section…

(Matt Hughes “taking it” from GSP.)

An entry on Matt Hughes’ official blog yesterday announced that his book “Matt Hughes – Made in America” has reached number 21 on the New York Times Best Seller List. Here’s the announcement:

We just got the NY Times bestseller list in, and MADE IN AMERICA is #21! Thanks to all the fans for making this happen.

I did in fact go to the New York Times website and did not see the former UFC welterweight champ’s book listed there. I was ready to scream bullshit, or cry wolf, or whatever else it is someone roars when they think they’ve been duped – or want to start a revolution. Then an edit popped up on Matt’s blog and it appears he may have pulled it off.

EDIT: If you go to the NY Times website, you will see a list posted there that is dated January 20th, 2008 and MADE IN AMERICA is not on that list. That list only reflects sales for the week ending January 5th. My book should be on the list for the week ending January 12th, which hasn’t been posted to their website yet; but it should be in a week or two.

-Matt

On Monday we gave BJ Penn some space on CagePotato. Now it’s time to do the same for Joe “Daddy” Stevenson. Props to MMA on Tap for the bit they did on the fighter today. The posting mentions how Joe Daddy was already a professional fighter by the age of 16. At that age, I was just concentrated on how to lay the seats back in my parents’ station wagon so I could bang my girlfriend. Joe Daddy is poised to fight BJ Penn in England on Saturday for the UFC lightweight crown at UFC 80: Rapid Fire.

The reason the two fighters will be going head-to-head for the title is because Sean “The Muscle Shark” Sherk got stripped of the title when he was busted for juicing last year. The Muscle Shark will have to try and win his belt back against the winner of Saturday’s fight. Both Penn and Stevenson agree that Sherk should fight the winner of their fight, per their words at the press conference.

More from Stevenson:

“The fight being for a title, it definitely has a lot of meaning behind it,” Stevenson said during a recent interview session. “It’s something that I’ve aspired to have ever since I started watching and following this sport.”

And when the term ‘underdog’ is thrown out in reference to Joe Daddy?

(Above: Skanks.)

It seems that Wanderlei Silva isn’t the only one who wants to “fuck Chuck.” Post-UFC 79, the Iceman’s life has gone back to being one continuous afterparty, and as this TMZ video clearly shows, the club rats are literally hanging off of him to steal some of his man-essence. I guess this means the dude doesn’t need Anthony Robbins anymore…

Note to the Iceman: Remember when people were blaming your back-to-back losses on your hard-partying ways and loss of focus? This is kind of what they were referring to. I know it’s hard to turn down the rock star lifestyle when it presents itself as an option, but it’s not something that’s conducive to regaining the championship belt. Rampage can get away with that shit, but he has a personal relationship with God to balance it out. And as for the women? While you’re blowing out your testosterone on these party girls, dudes like Keith Jardine spend their evenings sharpening their teeth, whipping themselves with nail-studded belts, and bedding down with bitches like these. But I’m not Chuck Liddell, I’m just a blogger who’s never had the pleasure of banging more than three broads at once, so what do I know.

Based on a new article published in The Canadian Press, UFC welterweight Jess Liaudin deserves a spot next to Jens Pulver in the Awful Childhood Hall-of-Fame. As the French-bred Londoner explains:

“My dad used to be quite physical. He punched me the first time, I was nine months. My grandfather came with a shotgun, put it to his head and said ‘If you ever do that again, I will kill you.’ So he didn’t do it ever again — in front of my grandfather. But he was doing it quite regularly at home.”

Wait, it gets worse:

Liaudin and his mother left the family home when he was 14 and lived with fellow homeless people in a church, eating food left over from markets.

“It was a very tough time,” he recalled. “We lived like that for six months, like bums.”

They graduated to an apartment in the roughest part of Bourges in central France. Surrounded by impoverished immigrants, Liaudin says he was “the white boy in the neighbourhood everyone wanted to beat up.”

“I was fighting every day. When my mom sent me to the grocery store to buy bread, I knew I would have to fight. It was pretty rough.”

And you know what? Things didn’t improve that much when he became a pro fighter.

Jason “The Punisher” Lambert — who takes on Wilson Gouveia on Saturday night — hasn’t fought since UFC 68 (3/3/07), but he proved himself to be a fighter of incredible heart during that match. Lambert was in big trouble during the first round, as Renato “Babalu” Sobral took his back and tried to sink in one of his infamous choke holds. But Lambert was able to defend the submission attempts and escape, and rocked Sobral with a couple of big punches when the fight went standing. Energized by his near-death, Lambert came out bashing in the second round, working Sobral over with ground-and-pound until Big John McCarthy stood the fighters up — which turned out to be the end for Babalu.

Yesterday, we brought you the live scoop of EliteXC’s conference call. The main topic was Kimbo’s upcoming February slaughter of Tank Abbott, but Gary Shaw also announced they would be following their March 29th event with a show on April 26th in Hawaii. The March event features Frank Shamrock against Cung Le, and the April throw-down will likely see the return of Nick Diaz – exploding eye sockets and all.

“He’s had surgery on his eye to repair all that scar tissue, and I think that Nick needed a rest,” said Shaw “He’s doing the right thing for Nick right now, and we’ve encouraged him to rest as well.

“But I think he’s fighting on the April 26 card.“

An opponent?

According to this press release, Directed Electronics has inked a deal with the UFC to become its “exclusive mobile audio partner.” Specifically, their Orion Car Audio brand will be promoted through ads on UFC.com, point-of-purchase displays, and an association with Roger “El Matador” Huerta, the lightweight contender and Sports Illustrated cover-dude whose entrance music we dig.

Says Jim Jardin, Director of Marketing for Directed:

“The UFC is one of the fastest-growing and most popular sports in the world with young men — exactly the same hardcore demographic that has made Orion a legend in high performance car audio for over 25 years. We look forward to our exclusive mobile audio partnership with the UFC and Roger Huerta as we promote the launch of the affordable Orion COBALT(R) line of speakers, amplifiers and subwoofers, and drive new car audio customers to Orion dealers.”

This could be good or bad, depending on how Directed and Huerta play it. If Huerta can use this opportunity to establish mixed martial artists as commercially viable celebrities who can endorse more than just vitamin supplements and t-shirts, then it’s a good thing. It’ll be a bad thing if the first pitch meeting goes like this:

Jim Jardin: Roger, you’re a Mexican, right?
Roger Huerta: Yeah.
JJ: Perfect. The Hispanic market is huge, in terms of car-speaker consumption, and we need you to help us connect to them. So for the first ad, you’ll be driving a low-rider with an Aztec goddess air-brushed on the hood. Orion speakers will just be pouring out of this thing. You know, like how they do in the barrio? Where you’re from? Anyway, you’ll also be wearing a big sombrero and a wife-beater. It would be a huge help if you grew a mustache.
RH: Can I wear my Mexican-flag hot-shorts too?
JJ: We’d actually prefer it.
RH: Then let’s do this, man.
JJ: Great. Except from now on, could you pronounce “man” as “mayng”?

(Mad props: MMAPayout)

(The “OG Durag” shirt, available for only 20 bones.)

Attention CagePotato readers with artistic ability and a strong pimp-hand: We’ve teamed up with badass MMA outfitter Serious Pimp for a contest that could add some thickness to your bankroll.

Serious Pimp is looking for their next hot-to-death t-shirt design, and they need your help. Go here and here to check out some of their work and get a feel for the West Coast hustler vibe. Then, all you have to do is design a t-shirt slick enough to bear the Serious Pimp label. Slap it together on photoshop, draw it freehand and scan it — do whatever it is you do, and then e-mail the final product (with your name and contact info, obvi) to contest@seriouspimp.com.

Five finalists will be chosen, and then you — the readers of this fantastic website — will get to vote on a winner, who will take home $500 in cash and $500 in Serious Pimp gear. Since the brand sponsors such MMA A-listers as Quinton Jackson, Dan Henderson, Royce Gracie, Ed Herman, and Rob McCullough (among many, many others), you never know whose back your design might end up on. So stop being an out-of-pocket ho’ and get pimpin’!

UPDATE: Deadline for entries is Tuesday, February 19th. Feel free to submit more than one design.

(The “Labeled Insane Cross” shirt. Flying angel skeletons!)

Two things occur to me after watching this training video, which Frank Shamrock recently sent out as a bulletin from his MySpace page:

1) Not that the ability to control a balance ball directly correlates to the ability to control a human being, but I’m starting to get the feeling that Cung Le is going to get his ass kicked.

2) I need some kettlebells immediately.

For more Frank, check out this new audio interview from Jarry Park, where the Strikeforce middleweight champ breaks down his match-up with Le, marketing the fight (he’ll be the “bad guy”), the new YouTube “mockumentaries” he’ll be dropping beginning next week to taunt his opponent, the status of his fight against his brother Ken, and his rejected CourtTV reality show. (Apparently, Frank TV already exists…)

Okay, I’ve got some bitch slapping to do. I can’t stay silent any longer. I’ve sat back and read the message boards around the MMA universe and listened to the lame ramblings of supposed MMA experts on a subject in the forefront of everyone’s mind. It could happen. It probably will happen at some point.

Who can beat Fedor Emelianenko?

While this is certainly a legit question/dead horse waiting to be beaten and should be at the top of every MMA dinner topic – and who hasn’t had several of those, right? – I’m fucking sick and tired of the lame-fucking-ass answers that keep floating around cyperspace and are shit from the mouths of these MMA ‘experts’. Check out some of the answers coming from the MMA world’s message boards:

-”A heavyweight Sean Sherk”
-”A bigger BJ Penn”
-”GSP, if he were a heavyweight”
-”Chuck Liddell”
-”Ricco, in his prime”

I’m losing my faith in humanity.

Don’t forget: the weigh-ins for UFC 80 will happen this Friday at the Metroradio Arena in jolly ‘ole Newcastle, England. The fun is supposed to go down at 4 p.m. – which translates to 11 a.m. for us Yanks. Doors are supposed to open for the event an hour before and even earlier for UFC fan club members (you know who you are) – provided you can make the overseas drive to England. The event will not be broadcast live.

UFC 80 will rock the joint on Saturday and will be broadcast live at 3 p.m. ET. You can also check out the tape delay if you’re lame at 10 p.m. ET. Both will be on Pay-Per-View. The event will feature BJ Penn vs. Joe Stevenson, Gabriel Gonzaga vs. Fabricio Werdum and Kendall Grove vs. Jorge Rivera.

In other UFC news, it’s being widely reported today that UFC 83 – rumored to also be going down in England – will probably be happening in the United States instead. A source is saying that the Brit locale is a definite no go, but the show will plow forward (March 8th).

UFC 82 is happening March 1st in Columbus, Ohio, so having another event happen so soon after that seemed a bit ambitious anyway. Maybe this is part of Dana White’s hype machine. Or just his deal-breaking cockiness. Or both. The bald wonder has certainly been vocal about getting more UFC events into Europe and Asia and this was the year to do that. This poses a bit of a set-back, but if the upcoming January 19th event goes as planned, that ground may be regained quickly.

No statements just yet as to where UFC 83 might really happen. I’m voting for Hope, Indiana, population 2,000. They need some MMA up in there.

When we last discussed Zuffa’s lawsuit against Randy Couture, our only source was an article in the Las Vegas Review Journal. Now, thanks to TMZ, we’ve seen the lawsuit with our own eyes (it’s conveniently PDF’d for you here). And after reading it, we immediately remembered why we never went to law school. But we were able to pick up a few interesting details:

— The lawsuit is seeking damages in excess of $50,000, not $10,000.

— Zuffa has hired Donald J. Campbell and J. Colby Williams as their representation.

— The lawsuit implicates Sherdog as the medium by which Randy Couture first began “implementing a tortious scheme and artifice whereby he and others acting on his behalf [fabricated] a false and fictitious history of events in which Couture was purportedly lied to and otherwise purposefully abused by Zuffa in a series of bad faith acts and unfair dealings.” Bastards! They get all the publicity!

— The parties who conspired with Couture are the “Does and Roe Corporations LLC” I think that means “to be named later,” but I’m no lawyer, and Google comes up with nothing, so I’m not 100% clear. But anyway, the lawsuit is referring to the people who hooked him up with HDNet so he could air his grievances in a public (or at least cable TV) forum. The accused “sought to maximize the damage inflicted upon Plaintiffs by arranging with HD Net TV to broadcast Couture’s remarks live and to later rebroadcast them during the course of an MMA event being presented by an UFC competitor.”

— Part of the financial judgement the UFC is seeking is to repay the costs that they incurred when they had to hold their response press conference (satellite uplink, production trucks, personnel, etc.).

— “Zuffa will further suffer a loss of prestige within the MMA community which will produce the consequential effect of inducing others not to deal with Zuffa.” Well, they may have a point there…

— Zuffa seems to accept Couture’s resignation from the organization on October 11, 2007, but argues that a one-year Restricted Period — in which he isn’t allowed to promote any events, programs, products or services related to unarmed combat — immediately kicked in. Couture’s sponsorship of the IFL’s “Xtreme Couture Team” was “the most recent and notorious” beach of “his covenant.”

See? Even better than NyQuil!

As promised earlier…

Click the “MORE” link and refresh the page every couple minutes to see the latest announcements and trash-talk from the EliteXC “Street Certified” conference call. Because knowing, as some say, is 50% of the battle.