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Triumph United Comment Contest, Week 1: Victory!

TU1
("Death Squad": One of the designs available at Triumph United.)

Between Chuck Liddell's leg injury and "Starnesgate," it was a great week to kick off our Triumph United Comment Contest. Our most sincere thanks to everyone who makes this site a two-way exchange of information by posting opinions, tips, and punchlines in the comments section. But which comment was the most shirt-worthy this week? First, let's give props to those who fell just short of the glory...

5th Runner-Up
"I told you I was hardcore." — TheFeniX on New 'Gladiator' Loses Shit, Beats Husband

4th Runner-Up
I bet chuck took kimbo up on that bare knuckle fight and got demolished — Anonymous on F*ck! Chuck Liddell Injured, Out of UFC 85

3rd Runner-Up
If BJ licks sherk's blood he may test positive for steroids in the post fight drug test. — steve-o-plata on "...and licking the blood off his face while I'm punching him..."

2nd Runner-Up
Would lube and a giant fake cock be too obvious? — Kimbo's Lice on Chuck Liddell's Injury is Disturbingly Real

1st Runner-Up
I don’t have health insurance at my place of employment so to show my boss up and to make a point I punched myself in the cock really hard, cried like a girl, then put the video on youtube. Take that you wanker!!! Go Starnes!! — KTFO on What's to Become of Kalib Starnes?

And the winner is...

"She’s the kind of girl you try and get pregnant on the first night just so she has a reason to call you back." — BringYourOwnBooya! on Strikeforce Ring Girl Nicole Craner

Congrajatations, BYOB: You just won a t-shirt of your choice from Triumph United! E-mail us at feedback@cagepotato.com and we'll get you all hooked up. For everyone else, better luck next week. We're pullin' hard for you...

Comments

Who the fuck is judging these things? Not saying that I said anything funny, only that Kimbo's Lice's comment is atleast 4 times funnier than both the First Runner-Up AND the Winner.

Kind of makes me :/

none of them were funny.. =(

I thought the last two were funny, especially the winner. You see, it subverts our normal expectations by suggesting that you'd actually want to impregnate a girl on a one-night stand, just because she's so hot. That's the opposite of what we'd usually expect a man to say. Because we aren't expecting it, that reaction seems humorous.

Nothing's funnier than explaining a joke.

I understand the pre-tense of a joke, douchebag. What I meant was, there were OBVIOUSLY funnier choices, and they lost.

Maybe this contest is like Matthew Riddle, just too inexperienced to be a winner.

(Sorry for the double/triple post here)

The first runner up wasn't even funny. In fact, there's nothing funny about the statement. It's just.. well.. stupid.

I laughed at it.. maybe im sick tho.

I thought the bottom of that shirt said jiu jitsu health club for some reason... someone should make that, its a much better saying.

Yea, because making a gay joke on the Internet is original... Then again, neither was my comment, but I didn't even consider mine funny. More of a slant on the insanity of dating a pro fighter of either sex. Seriously, there had to be warning signs early on, but maybe he liked being the gimp until things got out of hand.

True, FeniX. They really should have had a safe word.

who the fuck was judging these comments sir buzzkillington the third geez.

I remember laughing out loud when reading Kimbo Lice's comment the other day.

Kimbo's Lice was robbed! REMATCH!

kimbo's lice WAS the funniest.... but the winner WAS keepin it real!

This contest should be a user voted winner? holla if ya hear me!

i thought KTFO's comment was the funniest

DAMN that's a badass shirt...had my wife wash it then dry it in the drier then wash it again then dry it in the sun...now i just need to run it thru a load of fresh concrete, rinse off the excess, and get some blood on it.

Hi everyone! nice to meet you!) I'm babazukaz, 27y.o. male from Singapore!)
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baso babazukaso!