Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

September, 2008

Video: Sakara’s Head Kick KO

Alessio “Legionarius” Sakara goes upside Joe Vedepo’s head with his shin in the first round of their Ultimate Fight Night bout. For a very brief moment it looked as if Vedepo might weather the blow. Then his brain decided to just go into shutdown mode instead. Sakara seems to have worked on his takedown defense, but when he got dropped by a punch early he must have been having Chris Leben flashbacks.

In other video news, Kimbo Slice worked out for the media and vowed to kick ass and let them take the names. He really should consider doing his own record-keeping. If he’s not careful he might accidentally end up kicking the same ass twice, thus harming his overall ass-kicking efficiency.

He also says he’s “prepared to go 6-7 rounds if it takes that,” but says he doubts that it will. Good bet. I would also describe a scenario where the Kimbo Slice-Ken Shamrock bout goes seven five-minute rounds as ‘doubtful.’ For several reasons.


Houston Alexander Blames Fans for Loss

(Alexander vs. Schafer; props to MMA Scraps)

From Yahoo! Sports via MMA Mania:

“The crowd was so loud that I couldn’t hear my corner. If I heard them and knew, you know, there are 10 seconds left, five seconds left, whatever, I would have tried to hung in there a little longer and survived. But it was so loud and these people were supporting me so much, I couldn’t hear and I had to tap.”

Hear that, Cornhuskers? It’s your fault.

Watching the Alexander/Schafer fight again, a few things occur to me…

— The first big knee Alexander caught Schafer with at the 0:20 mark was borderline illegal. The second one was absolutely illegal. Coincidentally, the penultimate strike he landed on Keith Jardine during their fight last May was also an illegal knee. The dude’s been getting away with murder.

— Alexander still has no idea what to do when he’s mounted. It may be time to find a new training camp. (I hear the guys at Wolfslair Academy are very friendly…)

— Houston’s lack of aptitude on the ground shouldn’t take away from Schafer’s accomplishment; that arm-choke was fucking superb. Watch the way he sets it up from 4:33 until the tap. Still, Red won’t have too much of an impact in such a stacked division — a drop to middleweight might be in order.


Three More TUF 8 Castoffs Land on Their Feet

Lance Evans MMA
(You don’t mess with a black man named “Lance.”)

As if their ongoing financial troubles aren’t enough of a sign that EliteXC is circling the drain, how’s this: According to FiveOuncesofPain, the House That Gary Built has just signed weight-loss failure Jason Guida (17-17) to a fight contract. (Way to pursue that world-class talent, guys. Dana White just LHFAO.) Guida will reportedly make his EliteXC debut at an October 10th ShoXC event in Hammond, Indiana, against Mamed “Cannibal” Khalidov a Chechen fighter who has primarily competed in Poland, and who has gone 11-0-1 in his last 12 fights.

5oz. also reports that Rashad Evans’s older bro Lance Evans (2-2) — who was bounced out of last night’s Ultimate Fighter elimination round after suffering a rib injury during his fight against Vinny Magalhaes — will be returning to Canada’s TKO Championship Fighting outfit, and will take on former hockey enforcer Steve Bosse at TKO 35, which goes down October 3rd at Montreal’s Bell Centre.

One more light-heavyweight TUF Guy has apparently been signed to another organization, but he’s technically still on the show, so don’t click “More” if you want to keep the Team Nogueira vs. Team Mir experience pure as the driven snow.


When The Diaz Bros Come to Party, There’s Never a Dull Moment

(No, they aren’t posing. That’s just how they kick it.)

I’m not sure if I love the Diaz brothers in spite of their behavior, or because of it. I’m leaning toward the latter, if only because the more I see of them, the more I become convinced that they may be the most genuine people in all of MMA. All the yelling and swearing and flippin’ the bird? The posturing that reminds you of a fourteen-year-old kid who’s just grown his first facial hairs and is feeling like a man with the constant need to prove it? That’s them. That’s just how they are. Ultimate Fight Night was just one more example.

Not only is Nate Diaz a near mirror-image of his brother in the cage, he also mimicks his interview style. At least, that’s what people tell me. I couldn’t make out most of what he said after his win over Josh Neer last night. I caught the word ‘motherfucker.’ I believe the phrase ‘weak-ass punk’ was peppered in there, as well as the obligatory mention of the 209. Other than that, it was tough to decipher. I had hoped we’d get more in the post-fight press conference, but the Diaz brothers had other ideas.

Nate Diaz had barely taken his seat for the impromptu session with the press when Nick drew the attention to himself by shouting profanities at, well, someone. It was hard to tell who he was yelling at or why. The UFC PR staff seemed at their wits end, and they appealed to Nate to help them restore order.

Nate responded by saying, “I’m out,” and leaving the press conference altogether. Nick was still yelling as the two of them walked off down the hallway.

Say what you will about them, but they always come to fight and they know how to make an exit.


UFN 15: The Undercard

(The head kick. Photo courtesy of MMA Weekly)

You didn’t see it on Spike TV last night, but the undercard bouts for Ultimate Fight Night 15 were worth showing up for all by themselves. Yours truly was Octagon-side for the whole thing, and when I wasn’t hanging out in Clay Guida’s dressing room (more on that later), I was busy being impressed by some UFC newcomers.

Dan Miller def. Rob Kimmons via submission (rear naked choke) at 1:27 of round one

This one was quick, with only sporadic fits of action. Miller jumped to Kimmons’ back almost immediately. Kimmons tried to defend and dump him off, but Miller wasn’t having it. After about a minute of absolutely no movement, Miller locked in the choke and Kimmons fell backwards ala Frank Trigg against Matt Hughes, then tapped meekly while the ref took his time about stopping it.

Mike Massenzio def. Drew McFedries via submission (kimura) 1:26 of round one

New Jersey’s Mike Massenzio was particularly impressive in his first-round submission win over Drew McFedries. He put his wrestling skills to good use right away, shooting in on McFedries and getting side control in the ensuing scramble. After McFedries recovered his guard and attempted a triangle choke, which Massenzio shrugged off, it was countdown to kimura time. Massenzio got to north-south and extended McFedries’ arm, forcing him to tap.

Alessio Sakara def. Joe Vedepo via KO (kick) at 1:27 of round one

The most brutal finish of the night also came in the prelims, as Alessio Sakara put his shin directly on Joe Vedepo’s chin early in the first. Vedepo was looking for the takedown from the start, but Sakara’s defense looked much improved. When Vedepo couldn’t get him down he consented to stand and trade. That’s about when the high kick landed with a vicious crack that elicited ‘ooohs’ from the crowd. Vedepo stiffened up and keeled over backwards. Sakara moved in to finish, but it was — to put it mildly — unnecessary.


TUF 8.01 Recap: A Show of Balls

Jason Guida Frank Mir Ultimate Fighter UFC

The season premiere of The Ultimate Fighter: Team Nogueira vs. Team Mir began not with a bang, but with a whimper: As the 32 UFC hopefuls lined up to get pep-talked by Dana White, Phillipe Nover got a case of the vapors and passed out. (Is this show hardcore or what?!) To add further embarrassment to his situation, nobody seems to know how to pronounce Nover’s first name. He says “Filip,” but everyone else decides to go with the more ethnic-sounding “fi-LEEP” or “fi-LEEP-ay.” The guys are told they’ll be given 24 hours to cut weight, and will fight the following day. Our Guamanian buddy Joe Duarte comes in ten pounds over, but it ain’t no thing to him. Jason Guida, on the other hand, comes in like 47 pounds over.

During his agonizing cutting process, Guida pukes into a toilet like a sorority girl after a big date, then cramps up completely and his team has to look at his balls flopping out of his towel (see above). A doctor checks him out and says he can weigh in one more time before he’s given IV fluids and taken to a hospital. His final score: 207. One pound away. He fucked up, and he’s furious. He tells NSAC executive director Keith Kizer that he’ll “never be forgiven.” We are treated to this classic exchange…

Guida: “Just let me do this, doc.”
Kizer: “I’m not a doc, but no.”

And Mike Stewart, who was hanging out in the parking lot for just such an opportunity, gets in as an alternate. Then it’s time for the fights…

Krzystof Soszynski vs. Mike Stewart (205): Stewart gets jacked right away with a huge left hook, and then swarmed with strikes until the ref stops it. Back to the parking lot, buddy. By the way, there’s no fucking way I’m spelling out “Krzystof Soszynski” ever again. He will be referred to as K-Sos from now on.

Fernando Bernstein vs Dave Kaplan (155): Bernstein, a man after my own Hispanojew heart, faces another nice Jewish boy in Kaplan. Bernstein seems to strictly be a kickboxer, though, and after some ferocious striking exchanges, Kaplan gets the fight to the ground and sinks in a rear-naked choke. Dana suggests that Bernstein change his nickname from “Machete” to “Butter Knife.”


UFC Hands Out $30,000 Bonuses for UFN 15

(Nate Diaz vs. Josh Neer; props to MMAScraps.)

The UFC’s customary end of the night bonuses were worth 30k for Ultimate Fight Night 15. It’s too bad there was no time to replay any of the undercard fights, because it seems there were a lot of stoppages to choose from. Here’s who got the extra bumps:

Fight of the Night: Nate Diaz and Josh Neer for their always-competitive and action-packed main event battle.

Knockout of the Night: Alessio Sakara for Cro Copping poor Joe Vedepo.

Submission of the Night: Wilson Gouveia for his armbar of Ryan Jensen.

We’ll add gifs/videos of the last two as soon as we find ‘em…


Ultimate Fight Night 15: Main Card Results + Commentary

Houston Alexander MMA UFC
(For those about to get knocked the eff out, we salute you. Photo courtesy of MMAWeekly.)

FUCKIN’ HUSKERS!!! Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get down to business. “Ultimate Fight Night: Diaz vs. Neer” is going down in Omaha as we speak. But since it’s airing on tape-delay in most of the country, there might be some spoilers after the jump; feel free to come back when it’s 8 p.m. in your time zone. And please leave plenty o’comments now that leaving comments on this site isn’t such a pain in the ass. Click the “More” link when you’re mentally prepared, and refresh the page every few minutes to get all the latest from the Omaha Civic Center.

(P.S.: Stockton, son. Stockton California.)


Ultimate Fight Night 15: Undercard Results

Joe Lauzon Kyle Bradley UFC MMA
(Photo courtesy of MMAWeekly.)

Here there be spoylers. Proceed with caution.


Video: When Guidas Attack

(Props: CombatWire via Sean McCorkle)

As we learned on Monday, tonight’s season premiere of The Ultimate Fighter: Team Nogueira vs. Team Mir features Jason Guida nearly killing himself trying to make weight. We may never get to see him fight in the Octagon — but we do know that he’s one of the most ferocious cornermen in the world. Here he is pitching a shit-fit between rounds during a fight at a Primetime Fighting Championships event in May. Apparently the ref called for a standup at the end of the first round, which led to Guida’s boy John Murphy getting cut with a knee by Jeremy Ashley; Murphy eventually won by decision. Guida should consider himself lucky that the ref didn’t do this to him. Now if only he could put that same intensity into not eating cheese-steaks, he could be a contender.

Jason Guida MMA