More Tales From the Stank(ie)
(The infamous "he's going to eat that spit" speech. Inspiring.)
The last time we devoted blog space to Ultimate Fighter coach Al "Stankie" Stankiewicz, some of you complained that we were applying a double-standard by encouraging his drunken antics and denouncing those of Jesse Taylor and Junie Browning. Fair enough, but what you have to remember is this: when a young, strong professional fighter gets drunk and violent, it's called assault. When a crazy old man who goes by the name "Stankie" does it, it's hilarious. Why? Because he's old. The rules are different for old people. The rest of us just have to accept that.
It's kind of like when you go to a family Thanksgiving and your racist grandfather makes a remark about "those thieving, hot-blooded Latins." There's no point in getting upset, and you know he's just talking about Desi Arnaz anyway. So you do what any minimally functioning family does. You pass the potatoes and pretend it didn't happen.
Today's Stankie story comes yet again from Ryan Bader, who seems way more interested in telling these tales than any other cast member, God bless him. This time, it was our very own blogger, Efrain Escudero, who found himself pulled into the mysterious world that Stankie seems to inhabit all by himself:
Stanky had this thing with Efrian Escudero. He liked Efrian a lot but really wanted to spar him. Stanky always told him that he would kick his ass if they boxed. So one day we told Stanky his dreams were going to come true. Nogueira told him he could spar Efrian in straight boxing if he wore the chest/rib protector. They would spar in the ring, with full walkouts and the whole hooray. I would corner Efrian and the rest of the team would be behind Stanky. This made his day, if not year -- well, probably decade.
Kyle overheard Stanky while he was hitting the speed bag warming up talking to himself. Stanky was muttering out loud to himself, "Stanky, one last hoorah. This is it, old chap! You're back in the game! Back in the fire! Do this and you can finally put down the gloves."
Hahahaha!
Efrian and I walk out first, make our way to the cage and get him ready. Stanky comes out with the whole team behind him, on top of the world. It almost looks like he was going to break into tears. He entered the cage and gave Efrian a menacing look. (Or was he just squinting to see Efrain across the cage because they took of his glasses?)
The bell sounded, and they are at each other's throats. Well kind of, considering Efrian could only hit to the body on Nogueira's persistence. Stanky was actually telling Efrian to engage and heckled Efrian the whole time. In the end Stanky came out on top, with a little help from Efrian, but on top. This was his time, his glory, his moment where he shouted out, "Ponchita!" (His wife's name.) "Ponchita, I did this for you!" The scene freezes, goes to black and white, and fades out to blackness on his team's shoulders.
Wow. Seems like Bader gets a little carried away there at the end. It's hard to tell what's real and what isn't, and I'm almost expecting him to admit that it was all just a crazy dream he had. Someone please just tell me that there is video evidence of this and possibly other Stankie antics.
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Old, Bald and Irish Says:
"The rules are different for old people. The rest of us just have to accept that."
That's what I'ce been saying!
Gotta go and scream at the neighbors kids to...
"GET OFF MY LAWN!"
God...I feel so alive...
KneeToTheFace Says:
Good story. Stank owns.
ACORN: Apes Can Organize Rallies Now Says:
his nuts hang down to his knees.
Sodak Says:
Hahhaha why don't they show this shit! way better than spending an hour hyping a fight where you know whos gonna win.
Scar Tissue Says:
Maybe they can cut together another season of TUF bassed around Stankiewicz. CP has got to do an interview with Stanky!
Scar Tissue Says:
Maybe they can cut together another season of TUF based around Stankiewicz. CP has got to do an interview with Stanky!
Shawn Says:
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9E0CE3DE1430F934A25756C0A...
Stankie featured in the New York Times back in 1992. Not only was he a pro boxer who retired with a 21-7-3 record but his son played for the Yankees back in the day. Whowouldathunk.
Anthony Cazares Says:
I love this old man!!! His energy level is contagious. Someone please get this guy his show!!!
CG Says:
Holy shit -- that's Andy Stankiewicz's father? He was supposed to be the next big thing before he faded away and Jeter entered the scene.
Derly Says:
They're just hyping up the Stank until Dana decides he needs to fake his death for some emotional ratings. Didn't CP predict he'd die during the show... lol
zunk1 Says:
i'm so happy you guys appreciate and cover stankie
Jugger Says:
Ah, you say "the rules are different for old people," but I don't see you cutting Randy any slack.
yes! Says:
i totally agree that the rules should be/are different for old ppl including the one regarding driving a car.
James Says:
wow great link thats so funny its andy stankiewicz's dad...i remember his stint with the yanks! he would swing at anything and had an unmistakable charisma! just like his dad!
Maud Says:
lmfao... Stankie -400 Efrain +250
WhyisntStankieablogger Says:
This crazy sunova bitch needs to be a blogger for CP. GET IT DONE GENTS. Also anyone married to a chick named Ponchita is alright in my book. Imagine:
Stankie: I'm gonna love you all night long Ponchita.
Ponchita: Ohhh Stanke, you know how I like it.
Also her married name is Ponchita Sankiewicz. How fucking funny is that?
England is the best Says:
We've got loads of Stankie's over here and there all homeless eating in soup kitchens!!!
Jay Smith Says:
Nice shank Jugger! Stankie kind of reminds me of Rocky's trainer Mickey.
These England mufuckas always gotta fuck somethin up don't they.......
Fully. Says:
The part about Stankie talking to himself while working the speed bag made me actually lol.
Man this guy is awesome.
10pound Says:
STANK MASTAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
England is the best Says:
"Jay"
Talking of f**king things up hows the US Economy at the moment??
Let Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have a look at that for you
After all they did the business finding Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq!
Hey Stankie i'm sorry for taking a pop at you dude you really are a great advert
for Street bums and old Drunks every where....
Nobama Says:
Apparently "England is the best" (oxymoron) hasn't taken a look at the "euro-economy" recently either. Lol.
England rules Says:
Hey Nobama
Yes Bama!!
Just because you still wanna run around with a sheet over your head and rolla round in pig s**t all your life.. "Let go of your hate i feel the good in you"
And yes the English Economy has moved into S**t street
Right next door to the UFC 10K Runner Anderson "big box, little box hands" Silva!
OOps Sorry Dana but Mr Pound For Pound was Pants!
Nobama Says:
Hey "England rules: (LOL)
It's no surprise you want Obama. He's a socialist, like most Europeans. I'm actually against Obama because I've studied the policy differences between the two candidates. I know, I know, actually knowing what you're talking about is a foreign concept to you. You'll come around when you're old enough to know better.
England rules Says:
Man i'm to old to learn any new tricks dude, so ill just put my line in the water and see if i get a bite..
"Aunt Bessy get me the landing net, i've got a Nobama on the line!"
cage potato Says:
F*** who ever wrote this piece of coach all
Anonymous Says:
lol @ calling obama a socialist. american politics are so fucking far right that obama's platform wouldn't even be considered centrist in canada and europe. it's telling that socialist is considered a slander. look at the UN quality of life surveys for the past 20 years, the top 10 countries are almost always pretty far left leaning (pink commie on the american scale).
by calling obama a socialist you're exposing your personal bias and merely repeating republican talking points. i doubt very much you looked into anyone's policies.
(apologies for derailing this post)
Jay Smith Says:
Damn Anonymous..................... That's the BEST thing I ever read of yours (whichever fuckin anonymous you are).
Listen, this fake ass prince charles is just trying to rattle our cage. Speaking of cages, we'll see who's the shit on TUF's US vs "The birthplace of techno".
walrus Says:
Don't pollute Stankie's thread with your political beliefs
who cares Says:
WAR STANKIE!!!
Anonymous Says:
Obama is a donkey faced black man who speaks in empty platitudes, and is just as committed to bankrupting america and waging unconstitutional war as his "opponent", McInsane, and is there for unfit for any kind of government position, much less president. Americans should do themselves a favor on election day, and elect to stay at home with their families and let this circus pass on by.
Robp218 Says:
First off...this is not CNN. Go elswhere for political crap talking.
Second...Why the f*&k does spike not show that on the TUF? Morons!
Nobama Says:
I'm not a Republican. And the opposite of free market capitalism is socialism. Look up the definition and get back to me... "anonymously". Lol.
kwagnuth Says:
I WOULDA KNOCKED HIM INTO TOMORROW ROCK. Fuck Stankie.
UFC fan Says:
is it just me or stankie a weird fucking old man with issues? he babbles some shit and lets you hit on his gloves. I guess hes a good coach, but that dude is fucking weird as hell.
Anonymous Says:
Anybody got a video for this? I remember seeing it once and it was funny as all get out!