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Goodbye, Girls of Summer... (47 Pics)

March, 2009

“Bully Beatdown” Episode 2: The Redistribution of Wealth

All right, I’m done trying to force myself not to like “Bully Beatdown.”  The moment Michael Westbrook showed up to unleash a whipping on a guy who seems like a genuine jackass, that’s the moment I became a fan.  Not surprisingly, the less scripted “Mayhem” Miller is, the better he gets.  In this one he actually has a little bit of trouble convincing the bully in question to agree to certain doom, but manages to push the guy over the edge when he says, “You got one ball, please tell me you got two.”

Did I mention the bully was holding a basketball at the time?  Because it’s kind of crucial to this particular burn.

Again, this isn’t really MMA, and it probably isn’t especially helpful to the sport’s overall image (though I also can’t see how it’s all that harmful), but dammit, it’s fun. 

(Props: DC Sports Blog, via Cage Writer)

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Videos: Newton vs. Khatib, Manhoef vs. Maeda, Alexander vs. Test Dummy


(Props: Bloody Elbow)

MMA pioneer Carlos Newton returned to the ‘W’ column on Saturday night at the W-1 Inception show in Gatineau, Quebec, snapping a three-fight losing skid with his KO victory over Nabil Khatib. As you can see in the video above, the Gatineau fans are awful, Newton still looks light on his feet, and he can still pound a motherfucker out when need be. Big ups to the Ronin, who increases his career record to 14-13.

Below: The Melvin Manhoef/Keijiro Maeda scrap from the K-1 World GP event in Yokohama on Saturday, in which the usually-sturdy Manhoef got Kimbo Slice’d by a short right hand from the retreating Japanese fighter. Fans have been calling this one suspicious, but it’s more likely that Maeda just found Melvin’s button.


(Props: MMA Scraps)

After the jump: Houston Alexander stops by the Sport Science lab to test the effects of adrenaline on punching power. The verdict? Houston hits like a hammer in his normal state, and puts out a full 1,000 pounds of force after trainer Mick Doyle provokes him into insanity. And that’s before the needles come out…

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Sylvia/Mercer Boxing Match Moved to Lawless, Unregulated Wasteland

Tim Sylvia MMA UFC
(Unfortunately, Ray Mercer won’t be this star-struck. Photo courtesy of Land Sharks.)

When we reported that the Tim Sylvia/Ray Mercer "Crystal Pepsi" match had been shot down by the the New Jersey Athletic Control Board, you probably thought it was the last you’d hear about this strange footnote in Tim’s career. Well guess what — life’s not fair. Monte Cox has moved Adrenaline III to a different state, and the Maine-iac’s pro boxing debut will go on. As Sherdog reports:

[P]romoter Monte Cox announced the six-round heavyweight fight would be rescheduled for June 13 in Alabama as the main event of Adrenaline III. The hybrid boxing-mixed martial arts event will be held at the 17,000-seat BJCC arena in Birmingham. Cox confirmed that Alabama does not have a regulatory body to oversee the fight.

Well, that’s one way to get around the issue. There are no other bouts scheduled for Adrenaline III yet — and the league’s website offers nothing other than a link for a motorcycle helmet dealer — but if there’s no regulatory body to answer to, there’s really nothing stopping Monte from filling out the card with midget kickboxing, lesbian submission grappling, and a donkey act. Sounds like Birmingham is in for a good night.

Semi-related: Frank Shamrock also has his eyes on a move to pro boxing. In a new interview with MMA Convert, Shamrock says he might give the sweet science a try after he takes care of business against Nick Diaz, Cung Le, and (hopefully) Tito Ortiz. What, no more "Blood Brothers"?

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Matt Hamill and Brandon Vera Will See Who Gets to Celebrate Like a Jerk at UFC 101


(‘Okay, quit messing around now.  Where’s the rest of my paycheck?’)

Give the UFC credit, they can spot a nascent, kind-of-but-not-really grudge match in the making a mile away.  MMA Madness reports that Matt Hamill will meet Brandon Vera at UFC 101 in Philadelphia to see who has the chops to make it in the light heavyweight division and who will end up on the receiving end of an assholish celebration.

As you probably recall, Hamill head-kicked Vera’s friend and training partner, Mark Munoz, into a briefly frightening unconscious state, then paraded around the Octagon like he’d just hit a walk-off homerun in the last World Series game ever.  Hamill would later explain the celebration by pointing out that a) he’s deaf, so vibrations from an excited crowd get him really pumped, and b) he doesn’t head kick that many people, and this one was pretty sweet.

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Video: Aleks Emelianenko Eats a Right Hand, Dodges a Bullet


(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

As a footnote to his essay about leaving Red Devil and being totally cleared to fight in America, you may recall Aleks Emelianenko making passing mention of a bout against Ibragim Magomedov.  Well, it happened this weekend in Russia, and as you see it probably won’t be on anyone’s Fight of the Year list.

Emelianenko gets rocked by a good right hand at the end of an exchange and is clearly wobbled, but he’s savvy enough to clinch and hold on until he can get his mind unscrambled.  By that time, however, the referee has noticed that Magomedov is cut, and the fight gets stopped before it really had a chance to get going and Aleks is awarded the TKO victory.

A disappointing outcome?  Yeah, but you can’t blame them.  I wouldn’t want to be in there with Aleks if I had an open wound on my face either.  Come on.  We were all thinking it.

Related: Barnett Confronts Aleks, Re: Shit-Talking, Take Two
Sort of Related: Aleks Ponders UFC Offer, New Tattoo

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‘UFC Fight Night: Condit vs. Kampmann’ — The New Guys

Carlos Condit MMA UFC Natural Born Killer
(That pile of bricks used to be a building until Carlos mean-mugged it. Photo courtesy of DeMattos.)

The UFC’s next free show goes down this Wednesday on Spike TV at 8 p.m. ET/PT, with Carlos Condit vs. Martin Kampmann in the headlining spot and 11 more fights supporting it. (Yes, we will be runnin’ a liveblog, so keep that evening free.) Six fighters, most of them WEC veterans, will be stepping into the Octagon for the first time. Learn about them below, and tune in on Wednesday to see if their stories end in triumph or tragedy…

CARLOS CONDIT (WW)
?Experience: 22-4 record, with all wins by stoppage, and notable victories over Frank Trigg, Brock Larson, and Carlo Prater. Won the WEC welterweight title in March 2007 and defended it three times before the division was discontinued.
Will be facing: Martin Kampmann (14-2, 5-1 UFC)
?Lowdown: He finishes fights — seriously. Just 24 years old, the Natural Born Killer is on an eight-fight win streak, and hasn’t lost since June 2006. Condit began wrestling in high school and has been training jiu jitsu and kickboxing at FIT-NHB since he was 15. His opponent Martin Kampmann is another aggressive, well-rounded fight-finisher, so Condit’s UFC debut will not only be an important gauge of his abilities on MMA’s biggest stage, but an easy front-runner for Fight of the Night.

JESSE SANDERS (WW)
?Experience: 20-4 record in various midwestern promotions like Extreme Challenge and Iowa Challenge, with 18 wins by first-round stoppage. Holds a victory over the legendary Kenneth Allen.
Will be facing: Brock Larson (24-2, 1-1 UFC; returning to the Octagon after a five-fight stint in the WEC)
?Lowdown: Sanders’s old ProElite.com profile lists his nickname as "Iron Jaw" and his background as "retired from construction became broke then started fighting." It seems like going broke was a great career move, because the former boxer has become a force on the local circuit — as a can-crusher, at least. His last win was against a guy with an 0-4 record at the time, and only three of his opponents have had winning records. According to his MySpace page, he loves anything to do with NASCAR, enjoys riding 4-wheelers, laughed his ass off at Rush Hour 3, and doesn’t read. (Again, this is a real person, not a Jeff Foxworthy routine.) Larson wins this one via quality of competition.

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The 10 Fastest & Most Furious Knockouts of All Time: Gomi vs. Gracie

Fast & Furious MMA knockouts Takanori Gomi Ralph Gracie

#4: Takanori Gomi vs. Ralph Gracie @ PRIDE Bushido 3 (5/23/04), 6 seconds

Known for his very un-Gracie-like hard-charging style, Ralph Gracie racked up five-straight first-round stoppages in vale tudo matches during the ‘90s before re-entering competition in 2003 to test himself against modern mixed martial artists. But his PRIDE debut against Dokonjonosuke Mishima at Bushido 1 didn’t go so well — he only won by decision — and he returned to the ring seven months later ready to murder somebody. And that babyfaced little Japanese dude in the red corner, who Ralph’s student BJ Penn had choked out the year before? Yeah, he’d do. But Gracie was a little too anxious to get out there and kick ass (as evidenced by his refusal to touch gloves), and when he shot in right after the bell, his jaw ricocheted off Gomi’s knee; the Fireball Kid took over from there. This was the fight that officially put Gomi on the map — and served as the final six seconds in Ralph Gracie’s MMA career.

CLICK HERE FOR THE VIDEO…

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Josh Barnett and Roger Huerta Don’t Know What the Hell Is Going On

Josh Barnett Japan wrestling MMA
(How can Josh be thinking about a fight with Fedor when his loss to Gunma Devil is still unavenged? Photos courtesy of JoshBarnett.tv.)

"I’ve heard nothing, I know nothing, I see nothing. What it comes down to is that I don’t have a bout agreement to fight anybody in particular. This is coming up on my third fight for Affliction, with the logical idea that it would lead up to [a fight with Emelianenko]. But as it sits, I’m sitting on my last fight and I’m just waiting for an opponent to show themselves. Whoever is available, I’ll take them, but I know the fans are really hot to see me fight Fedor. It just hasn’t been put together." — Josh Barnett on Inside MMA, discussing his uncertain future. The persistent rumor of Affliction’s third show going up against UFC 100 would seem even more ill-advised if it isn’t even headlined by Emelianenko vs. Barnett.

"To be honest I’m just waiting… for the UFC to give me a phone call and I’m able to fight my last fight. I’m just kind of waiting on that."— Roger Huerta on Inside MMA, discussing his own uncertain future. After declining to renew his UFC contract in January in order to pursue a career in acting and modeling, Huerta turned down a fight against Joe Stevenson at UFC 95 in February and hasn’t exactly been on the UFC’s speed-dial since then. Huerta has one fight remaining on his current contract, which runs through December.

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Penn Claims Florian Fight Is On For UFC 101 in Philly

BJ Penn MMA UFCKenny Florian MMA UFC
(Time to "kill that master"? Photos courtesy of GrapplingStore and MMASplatter.)

According to a new posting on BJPenn.com, the UFC lightweight champ will defend his lightweight title against #1 contender Kenny Florian in the headlining bout of UFC 101 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, on August 8th. The report states that Florian has already signed the bout agreement, and Penn’s own signing was imminent. It will be the first time the UFC’s lightweight title has been contested in 15 months, since BJ Penn defeated Sean Sherk by TKO at UFC 84 last May. Florian has won his last six fights (five by stoppage), but hasn’t competed since his first-round submission of Joe Stevenson at UFC 91 in November.

If the Penn/Florian report is accurate, it would mean that two of the UFC’s five championship titles could potentially be on the line in the month of August. As we previously reported, a middleweight title scrap between Anderson Silva the winner of Anderson Silva/Thales Leites [Ed. note: Ha! Sorry, Thales!] and Demian Maia may be added to UFC 102 (August 29th; Portland, Ore.).

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The 10 Fastest & Most Furious MMA Knockouts of All Time: Goulet vs. Brown

MMA knockout KO video Jonathan Goulet Joey Brown Fast & Furious

#5: Jonathan Goulet vs Joey Brown @ TKO 17 (9/25/04), 7 seconds
He calls himself the Road Warrior, but Jonathan Goulet may as well be nicknamed “The Flash.” Twenty-five of the UFC/TKO veteran’s 32 pro fights have ended in the first round, and six have ended within the first 30 seconds. (Luckily, he’s won most of them.) Goulet’s all-time fastest victory was this seven-second KO against Joey “Knockdown” Brown. All it took was a head kick, a quick Thai clinch, and a knee fired right up the middle, and Brown was in dreamland. The win was Goulet’s fifth in what became a ten-fight win streak, which culminated in him scoring a contract with the UFC, shooting down Jay Hieron in his notoriously bloody Octagon debut, and choking out Shonie Carter back in Canada. As for Brown, he still seemed to be dizzy from Goulet’s knee during his next four fights, losing all of them.

CLICK HERE FOR THE VIDEO…

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