Wanderlei Silva seems to think so. While discussing his 195-pound catchweight bout against Rich Franklin that will headline UFC 99 (June 13th; Cologne, Germany), he told MMA Junkie the following:

You know what they call mixed martial artists who walk around at 210 pounds? Middleweights. Some of the UFC’s top 185′ers, including Anderson Silva and Nate Marquardt (as well as Rich Franklin before he left the middleweight division), reportedly weigh in the 215-220 range between fights. Wanderlei Silva’s "situation" is that he’s smaller than most light-heavyweights, and cutting weight sucks. That’s pretty much it.

At this point, installing more weight classes in the UFC wouldn’t do anything besides dilute the talent pool, and a super-middleweight class would only be useful in providing Wanderlei Silva with another venue to fight for a championship belt — because it didn’t work out for him in the light-heavyweight division, and Anderson Silva owns the middleweight class, so that’s not really an option either. It kind of sounds like Wandy is already psyching himself out for the eventual cut to 185. If he loses to Franklin in June, he may decide that it’s not even worth it.

(The #1 clown in Las Vegas poses with some guy named Charlie. Props: CharlieTheClown.net via MMA Splatter.)

“How do I feel about them trying to counter-program UFC 100? I love it. I fucking love it. I love it. I don’t like these guys and I want to see them spend more of their t-shirt money. What they should be worrying about is — they’ve already seen first hand that nobody gives a shit about Affliction MMA — what they need to start worrying about is nobody wants to wear their goofy fucking clothes anymore either. The fad is over and they better start saving as much of that t-shirt money as they can.” — DW to FiveOuncesofPain, regarding the recent reports that Affliction will hold its third (and likely final) event on July 11th, the same day as UFC 100.

"I called BJ to tell him to stop with the BS and to start fucking training." — DW on Sirius Radio yesterday (via BloodyElbow). Our thoughts exactly.

"Apparently he doesn’t know what guys who are on steroids look like, okay? They don’t fuckin’ look like me…You know what I’m on? I’m on fuckin’ pizza, chicken fingers, and cheeseburgers, okay?…Pregnant bitches don’t eat as much as fuckin’ I do right now." — DW responds to allegations made by Tiki Ghosn that he’s a steroid abuser, in a new video for Trumph United (via CageWriter).

(Bobby Lashley vs. Jason Guida)

MMA matches:
Jeff Monson def. Roy Nelson via unanimous decision (29-28 x 3)
Bobby Lashley def. Jason Guida via unanimous decision (30-27 x3)
Din Thomas def. Gabe Lemley via TKO, 4:13 of round 1
Dennis Hallman def. Danny Ruiz via submission (rear-naked choke), 1:50 of round 1
James Freeman def. John Mowry via KO, 2:38 of round 1

Boxing matches:
Roy Jones Jr. defeated Omar Sheika via TKO, 1:45 of round 5
B.J. Flores def. Jose Luis Herrera via unanimous decision
Eric Clinton def. Richmond Dalphone via unanimous decision
Kieyon Bussey def. Robert DaLuz via majority decision
Kelvin Price def. Kevin Howard via majority decision

Notes…

— The Lashley/Guida bout didn’t live up to the pre-fight trash-talk, and Lashley proved that he’s not quite ready for prime time. The first round was spent mostly in a clinch against the ropes after Guida was able to stuff Lashley’s takedown attempts. The next two rounds saw Lashley on top of Guida and working some ground-and-pound, but Guida never took much damage. In fact, a guillotine choke attempt that Guida put on Lashley in the third round was the closest that the fight came to being finished. It was a moral victory for Guida — though his record now drops to 17-20, while Lash increases to 2-0.

— Roy Nelson got straight-up robbed by the judges. Though Jeff Monson did win the third round via striking exchanges, the first two were controlled by Nelson, who scored takedowns and was able to achieve mount in both rounds. But it seemed that all three judges credited the second frame to Monson due to some knees he threw in the clinch. After the fight, Monson admitted that the fight "could have gone either way," while Nelson immediately stormed off in anger.

— After beating Gabe Lemley with a ferocious punches-and-knee combo that put Lemley out cold, Din Thomas told the crowd that it’s not cool to put hands on a lady, and if Rihanna needs someone to kick Chris Brown’s ass for her, she should holla.

More videos from "March Badness" are after the jump…

Jason Guida continued his efforts to get all up in Bobby Lashley’s head at the "March Badness" weigh-in.  This included weighing in at a non-impressive 232 pounds (Lashley was 251.5), flexing while making a ridiculous face, and then turning his baseball cap around to make sure he could get right in Lashley’s grill. 

Here’s the question: does Guida really think that he is bothering Lashley with these antics, or has he come to the realization that his best chance in this fight is to make Lashley so angry he screws up somehow?  Or, even more far-fetched, does he really like his own chances in this fight simply because Lashely "faked it" in pro wrestling? 

Maybe Guida knows something we don’t.  Or maybe he’s just decided to make himself into a court jester to ensure he entertains people in one way or another.  Fight time is just a couple hours from now, so we’ll have our answer soon enough.

Hey everybody, look who has a sense of humor!  Responding to renewed Lubrigate allegations, Georges St. Pierre admits that he did cheat, only not by greasing up his body.  Instead, he hired some long-hair to kiss B.J. Penn on his way down to the Octagon and sap all his strength before the fight even started.  That devious French-Canadian.

GSP also insists that his best revenge against B.J. Penn now would be to "’elp Kenny Florian to kick ‘ees ass.”  Or maybe he can just keep Penn tied up in hearings and out of the gym all the way to fight time.  Although judging from how he talks about the outcome of this week’s hearings, it seems as if GSP is under the impression that he won.  I guess that’s kind of true, in the sense that he didn’t lose.  Maybe his legal representatives are giving GSP a simplified account of what happened at the NSAC.  That’s probably for the best.  The guy doesn’t want to hear all the back and forth.  Just tell him ‘we won!’ and he’ll sleep better.

("MMA Live" talks Greasegate, prematurely mourns Jason Guida.)

– Check out how the MMAdness tourney is progressing. (Fanhouse)

– Kurt Pellegrino only kind of interested in this fighting stuff. (Fightlinker)

– Belcher agrees to fight with Akiyama at UFC 100. (MMA Weekly)

– Dana White not a fan of hybrid cards. (Cage Writer)

– Georges St. Pierre shoots Gatorade commercial. (MMA Frenzy)

– Maybe Anderson Silva won’t retire at 35 after all. (Fighters Only)

- This is how everyone should dunk. (Holy Taco)

- Why "Commando" is the greatest film of all time. (Screen Junkies)

- Daily Market Madness. (Wall Street Fighter)

- Somehow he lived to tell about this crash. (All Left Turns)

- Insurgents vs. Apache Hellfire Missiles. (Nothing Toxic)

- Rally car hits deer. (Scores Report)

Loyal readers of this site know how much we love video highlights and lists of things, so it should be no surprise that we really enjoyed the latest effort from KingAtRock (who you might remember from such videos as this one or that one).  So yeah, we probably would have posted this regardless, but it sure didn’t hurt that he gave us a little shout-out at the end.  Let this be a lesson to the rest of you: never underestimate the power of pandering to our collective ego.  

On the real though, this is a pretty solid list of upsets.  It does seem a little strange, considering what we know about each man’s career trajectory, to think of Rashad Evans’ brain cell-destroying knockout of Chuck Liddell as an upset.  At the time it was a shocker, sure, but now it seems like we probably should have seen it coming.  Who knows, maybe someday we’ll be saying the same thing about Thales Leites’ dramatic victory via flying triangle choke over Anderson Silva.  Probably not, though.

(Props: "Card" on the UG)

Now that we know who’s going to be in the upcoming UFC game, it’s time to look at how those fighters will throw down within the "virtual Octagon." In the above video, 2009 Undisputed producer Neven Dravinski takes us through weak and strong strikes, and the various ranges they can be delivered. The GSP Superman-punch KO of BJ Penn at 0:09-0:12 makes us smile every time we see it.

Below: One day left until Jason Guida gets a giant reality check — but for the time being, he gets to be talk about how he’s "all over [Lashley's] mind" and how he actually feels bad for him, because the former WWE star has to jump in the deep end right away without being built up first. (*Cough*) Skip to the 2:18 mark and smell the magic.

After the jump: King Mo‘s pimp-ass post-Sengoku press conference.

("Mommmmm, you’re embarassing me!")

Netterbog on "Jenna Jameson Gives Birth to Two Lil’ Tito’s": As #2 was turtle-heading its way out, I wonder if Tito gazed lovingly into Jenna’s eyes and said, "let me tell you how you’re feeling right now."
[Ed. note: "Babe, made you me the happiest on Earth man."]

Ted Nutmeg on "Karo Parisyan Suspended, Fined, Stripped of Last Win, and Told ‘Good Day’ by NSAC": Commissioner John Bailey’s statement that the NSAC "can’t have fighters drifting in and out of reality" should have far-reaching implications. At a minimum, I foresee lifetime bans for B.J. Penn, Tim Sylvia, Tito Ortiz, Patrick Cote’s friends, and anyone who has ever had any affiliation with the Lion’s Den at any point in his life.

FEDORISAPUSSY on "Must-See: Franky Van Hove, the One-Legged MMA Fighter": Talk about a one legged man in an ass kicking contest!
[Ed. note: For real. I bet Franky's cornermen never have to tell him to "stay busy".]

Marcer on "BJ Penn to Possibly Form Cult, Lead Unholy Army of Martial Arts Instructors": I came across a few examples of the classes that will be offered at this camp:
"PENN 101 – Maintaining narcissism in the face of adverse reality
PENN 213 – Increasing Chi by consuming blood
PENN 122 – The fundamentals of shit talking
PENN 203 – Cooking with a deep fat fryer – With a short intermission to cover cardiovascular training in its entirety"

If your name has been called, e-mail feedback@cagepotato.com with your name, address, and shirt-size, and we’ll get a CP "Hall of Fame" t-shirt out to you post-haste!

(Most honest post-fight reaction…eva.)

Strong Island native Matt “The Terra” Serra has penned a piece for Newsday appealing to New York legislators to lift the ban on MMA and regulate events in his home state.  He makes some of the same arguments we’ve all been making/hearing for years – it brings in money, it isn’t that violent, it’s not as bad as boxing, etc. – but Serra is in the unique position of being able to lead with this very personal appeal to emotion:

Last April, I fought Georges St. Pierre in a rematch of the Ultimate Fighting Championship welterweight title match. Our sport is banned in New York, and this fight was held in Montreal, St. Pierre’s hometown. The sold-out crowd of 21,000 was less than welcoming – everywhere I went that weekend, I heard jeers and boos. When I eventually lost the match, the cheers for my opponent were deafening.

(James Thompson vs. Jim York.  Props: MMA Videos)

Say this for James Thompson, dude is dependable.  You can always count on him to come charging out of his corner at the sound of the bell, then become quickly exhausted, and finally get dropped by a punch that doesn’t look all that hard.  In a sport where consistent performers are hard to come by, it’s refreshing to know exactly what you’re going to get when "The Colossus" is in the ring.

After the jump, more videos from Sengoku’s "Seventh Battle" that are actually athletically meaningful.

(If this happened in real life, you’d expect the people around the cage to freak out a little more. Image courtesy of GameSpot.)

GameSpot has revealed the full fighter roster for the UFC’s long-awaited video game 2009 Undisputed, which will be released on May 19th for the Xbox 360 and Playstation 3. (Props to MMA Junkie for the heads-up.) The list is below; fighters with weight-class abbreviations after their names can also be played in those divisions. As you’ll see, there are some unfortunate omissions (Randy Couture, Shane Carwin, Matt Hamill, Patrick Cote, Jon Jones, Junie Browning), a few guys who left the UFC a long time ago (Andrei Arlovski, Tim Sylvia, Tito Ortiz, Kazuhiro Nakamura), and one fighter who isn’t even alive anymore (Evan Tanner).

Heavyweights: Andrei Arlovski, Mark Coleman, Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovic, Gabriel Gonzaga, Antoni Hardonk, Heath Herring, Cheick Kongo, Brock Lesnar, Justin McCully, Frank Mir, Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira, Eddie Sanchez, Tim Sylvia, Cain Velasquez, Brandon Vera (LHW) and Fabricio Werdum

Light heavyweights: Houston Alexander, Ryan Bader (downloadable character available exclusively through GameStop), Tim Boetsch, Stephan Bonnar, Rashad Evans, Wilson Gouveia (MW), Forrest Griffin, James Irvin, Quinton Jackson, Keith Jardine, Chuck Liddell, Lyoto Machida, Kazuhiro Nakamura, Tito Ortiz, Mauricio "Shogun" Rua, Thiago Silva and Wanderlei Silva

Middleweights: Ricardo Almeida, Michael Bisping (LHW), Kendall Grove, Rich Franklin (LHW), Dan Henderson (LHW), Martin Kampmann (WW), Chris Leben, Thales Leites, Jason MacDonald, Demian Maia, Nate Marquardt, Drew McFedries, Yushin Okami, Amir Sadollah (WW), Anderson Silva (LHW) and Evan Tanner

(Props: FightTrend)

- Muhammed Lawal def. Ryo Kawamura via unanimous decision
- Hatsu Hioki def. Chris Manuel via submission (armbar), 4:12 of round 1
- Nam Phan def. Hideki Kadowaki via TKO, 3:09 of round 1
- Jim York def. James Thompson via KO, 4:33 of round 1
- Michihiro Omigawa def. L.C. Davis via unanimous decision
- Marlon Sandro def. Matt Jaggers via submission (arm-triangle choke), 2:57 of round 2
- Masanori Kanehara def. Jong Man Kim via unanimous decision
- Chan Sung Jung def. Shintaro Ishiwatari via submission (rear-naked choke), 4:29 of round 1
- Ronnie Mann def. Tetsuya Yamada via unanimous decision
- Nick Denis def. Seiya Kawahara via TKO, 2:36 of round 1

Notes:

— King Mo was yellow-carded in the second-round for poking Kawamura in the eye twice. He dominated the fight with his takedowns; one judge scored the fight 30-24 for Lawal.

— The second-highest-ranked featherweight in the tournament, L.C. Davis, lost to the fighter with the worst record. Yes, we’ll be updating that Power Rankings page soon. Red-hot prospects Marlon Sandro and Ronnie Mann may have a spot on it shortly.

— The night’s other notable upset belonged to Nam Phan, a middling lightweight who dropped a weight class to be in the tournament and wound up knocking out former Shooto champ and top-15 featherweight Hideki Kadowaki.

— James Thompson went back to doing what he does best: Getting KTFO’d. His traditional fight-opening gong-and-dash nearly sent him flying out of the ring.

(Worth it just for the introductions.)

Sengoku 7 is popping off tonight live on HDNet at 3 am EST.  Sure, you could DVR it and get some sleep instead of staying up to watch it live, but wouldn’t that only make the people at HDNet feel like they made the right decision by not showing the last Dream event live?  I don’t know about you, but if there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s allowing others to feel as if they’ve done the right thing.

That’s why I’m staying up to watch it.  Maybe that means I’ll be a mess tomorrow, but the way I see it the quality of my work is already so poor, who’s going to notice?  Here are some things you can do while you’re waiting for tonight’s broadcast and fighting off the powerful forces of sleep:

(Via Dreamofficial.com)

Need a reason to continue living until April 5?  How about Dream 8, which will feature the rematch between crazy-talking, tights-wearing submissions wiz Shinya Aoki, and amateur porn star Hayato "Mach" Sakurai.  It has now been officially announced.  So step in off that ledge (we knew you weren’t going to jump anyway, you pansy) and get through the next couple of weeks.  You will be rewarded with what should be one hell of a fight.

If you need help passing the time, watch what happens when dudes try to get funny with Aoki on their back.  It’s not funny ‘ha-ha,’ more like funny ‘you’re a moron.’

Watch MMA Fix Presents MMA Ring Girl Search 2! on RawVegas.tv

Oh, these “ring girl searches.”  Just related enough to the sport of MMA for us to have an excuse for posting them.  I really like Dave Farra’s interview style, because he manages to say things like “Maybe you should go with the ass-shaking thing again, because that worked pretty well last time,” and yet somehow he does not come off sounding like a jerk or a perv, like I would if I said that to a girl in a club.

Seriously though, why do they always ask these girls what they know about MMA?  Are we supposed to be disappointed when a wanna-be ring girl can’t even name an MMA fighter?  Because I’m not.  Nor am I surprised.  I am, however, endlessly amused by the girl who says she likes Randy Couture before blowing a kiss to him (assuming that he’s at home watching Raw Vegas videos on his computer, of course).  When Dave informs her that he’s married to a woman who can also fight a little bit, she responds, “Well then I guess I’ll have to wait.”

I’ll let you guys debate whether that woman has failed to grasp the concept of marriage, or whether she actually knows enough about Couture’s personal history for that to be a somewhat intelligent statement.

("Child-brides welcome!")

Just because you’re a martial arts master who’s been teaching a specific fighting style for years, it doesn’t mean you can’t learn a lot from BJ Penn. In fact, Penn would like to help 300 hand-picked martial arts instructors improve their minds, bodies, and spirits through a year-long training camp in Hawaii called "The Live Like a Champion Project." (The press release is after the jump, in case you don’t feel like clicking on that link.) This is troubling for a number of reasons:

1) So basically, the Prodigy is luring the world’s most skilled fighters to an extended stay at his shadowy island fortress. Yes, that’s the exact plot of Enter the Dragon.

2) It’s such a perfect expression of BJ’s hubris. Penn has gained fame as a brilliant fighter, but he’s not really known as a talented teacher. (Sorry, Rude Boy, it’s not your fault.) Yet he feels he’s qualified to tell hundreds of instructors how to do their jobs. Particularly, he aims to train the minds of these people. The irony of a blood-licking crybaby obsessive holding seminars on inner tranquility is apparently lost on him.

3) The fact that the program requires its participants to spend a full year in Hawaii will generally attract men without families, who have no problem quitting their paying job and living off the food and shelter that Penn gives them — in other words, disturbed loners who will be easily influenced by the Jim Jones-like sway of BJ. Okay fine, I’ll spell it out for you: BJ Penn is obviously trying to start his own cult. Check out his Christ-like pose in the above image. You wouldn’t drink cyanide-laced coconut milk for this man? Of course, before the mass suicides, the Penntown 300 could be sent on revenge missions against Georges St. Pierre and Keith Kizer. Far-fetched? Maybe. But don’t say you haven’t been warned.

(Props: TheGarv)

My goodness, Bobby Lashley is one large man. And Jason Guida is one brave/stupid one. You get the feeling that as a child, Guida would entertain himself by throwing rocks at wasps’ nests, because "wasps ain’t shit." Anyway, feel free to skip to the faceoff at the 3:08 mark, which leads to a nice little face-shove by Lashley at 3:59. It’s almost worth shelling out the $29.95 to see this one on pay-per-view — and definitely worth watching it on the Internet for free the next morning.

Also: Jeff Monson, who will be fighting Roy Nelson on Saturday night, couldn’t make it to yesterday’s "March Badness" press conference because he was involved in a minor car accident. (Ex-girlfriend cut his brake lines, maybe?) In the video after the jump, we see that even his own team is tired of his bullshit at this point.

(I don’t like that smirk on your face, four-eyes.  You.  Me.  Cage.  Now.)

With every good idea, there always have to be some idiots who come along and screw it up for everyone.  The Greeks go and invent democracy, and then a few thousand years later "American Idol" pops up and demonstrates its flaws. 

Former principal Donald Moten and the jerks at South Oak Cliff High School in Dallas, Texas are the latest to mess up a beautiful concept, since they decided that it would be a good idea to put problem students in a cage and make them fight it out bare-fisted to settle disputes.  And they actually thought they wouldn’t get in a world of trouble for this, somehow.  Christ, even the warden in “Cool Hand Luke” gave the guys boxing gloves.

Thanks to barstoolsports (via Doyle) we were turned on to this story in the Dallas Morning News, which cites reports of two years worth of totally illegal and unethical fights:

(Props: Cage Writer)

So you want B.J. Penn to stop his courageous fight for truth, justice, and a no contest?  That probably means you’re a bad person who hates MMA.  Bummer.  Penn continues to frame this as a crusade to clean up the sport, which would be great.  But odds are the UFC is still not going to give him that "fair fight" rematch he wants.  And maybe he should be thankful for that.

(From All Elbows, via Fightlinker)

King Mo tries to entertain himself while he waits for his Sengoku bout.  I have to admit that it’s refreshing to see how much pleasure he gets out of old episodes of “Martin,” but when he starts telling the Japanese media how much he loved pro wrestling as a kid and mentions both The Ultimate Warrior and “Ravishing” Rick Rude as favorites, that’s where I get suspicious.  How can you like both guys, Mo?  Don’t you know they were mortal enemies?!  Just ask Bobby “The Brain” Heenan.  He’ll tell you.

 
"MMA is new to Bobby. I don’t have anything against him. Someday he could be good for MMA. I welcome him, after I beat him, to work at our club (Hellhouse) to learn how to fight. Lashley’s going to find out that this is MMA not WWE. He’s in for a rude awakening, which probably will be a good thing — he’ll be fighting a real MMA guy…This is for real. How long have you been faking? How long in the WWE? How long has it been since somebody hit you on the chin for real?"

— Jason Guida, quoted at yesterday’s "March Badness" press conference. The 17-19 fighter hopes to snap a three-fight losing streak against former WWE star Bobby Lashley (1-0) this Saturday night in Pensacola, Florida. The fact that Lashley is a jacked 250-pounder and Guida is a pudgy light-heavyweight doesn’t seem to bother him, but oh man is this going to be a massacre. Our only hope is that Guida has a chance to do his "disappearing mouthpiece" trick during the fight. Always a crowd-pleaser…

(The launch issues for the new U.S. and Canadian versions of Fighters Only, available on newsstands now.)

Heads up, Potato Nation. Fighters Only, the world’s longest-running MMA and lifestyle magazine, has finally invaded North America with new editions for the U.S. and Canada. Previously only available on import, subscriptions to the U.S. and Canadian versions of the magazine are now available, and we’re giving you lucky people the chance to win one. All you have to do is come up with a clever caption for the photo after the jump [updated, 10:13 a.m. ET: We had to switch the photo; sorry for wasting your brilliance], and post it in the comments section below. The best five captions will win subscriptions to the Fighters Only edition of their choice. Feel free to enter multiple times, but be sure to get in your captions by Monday night at midnight ET. Good luck!

(Welcome to the world, Jameson twins.  You’re screwed.)

Tito Ortiz and Jenna Jameson have put the unfathomable power of their two super-brains to work and come up with names for their newborn twins: Jesse and Journey Jett. 

You know, considering who their parents are, I’d say these kids got off pretty easy.  Although it is a bit of a screw-job to give one kid a normal name and then name the other after a band that won’t even be ironically cool anymore by the time they’re in junior high.  But hey, as long as they’re both carrying around the illustrious Jameson surname neither one of them is going to be lacking in emotional baggage.

In other news…

(Whaddaya say, Baby Face, feel like taking a pay cut and burning some bridges?)

According to FiveOuncesofPain, Affliction is looking at holding their third event on July 11, 2009.  If you’re thinking that this date sounds familiar for some reason, congratulations, you are an astute observer!  Yeah, July 11 is when UFC 100 is.  And it’s kind of a big deal to the UFC.  So why would Affliction guarantee that their event gets counter-programmed by scheduling it on the same night as one of the biggest UFC cards ever?  Possibly because they know they’re done and want to hurt the UFC however they can on the way out.

That’s what Sam Caplan thinks, anyway.  According to his report Affliction is offering “restructured” contracts to their fighters (read: asking them to fight cheap) in the hopes of lowering overhead costs and getting the event on network TV or basic cable.  They know that no pay-per-view distributor wants to go head to head with the UFC, but if they can offer their show up for free they figure it might hurt the UFC’s PPV buys just a little, and what the hell, Affliction isn’t looking to promote any events after this one anyway.

("The Year of the Mo: Part One," courtesy of Esther Lin.)

With no UFC event scheduled until April 1st’s UFC Fight Night: Condit vs. Kampmann, the MMA world feels like a bit of a wasteland lately. But if you get HDNet in your cable package, you’re in for a treat. Sengoku: Seventh Battle goes down Friday at the Yoyogi National Gymnasium in Tokyo, and will be broadcast live on HDNet beginning at 3 a.m. ET/midnight PT. (So, late Thursday night, in other words.) A replay is scheduled for Friday night at 10 p.m. ET/7 p.m. PT, in case you forget to set your DVR, or you’re too poor to afford one or something.

Sengoku 7 features the first round of the league’s featherweight grand prix — which includes #7-ranked featherweight Hatsu Hioki, undefeated Nova Uniao prospect Marlon Sandro, UFC vet Michihiro Omigawa, and former Shooto champ Hideki Kadowaki — as well as a headlining light-heavyweight scrap between King Mo and Pancrase vet Ryo Kawamura, and James Thompson‘s latest attempt to participate in a fight that doesn’t turn into an utter fiasco. The official bout order is after the jump, courtesy of Nightmare of Battle. Will any of the gaijins fail as hard as David Gardner did at the last DREAM show? Tune in to find out!

Our buddy Robert at FreeFightVideos sent us these strange clips with this note: "This is as far as I know the first physically handicapped MMA fighter. His name is Franky Van Hove. His nickname is "The submission King" and he hails from Holland." Damn. Mad respect for trying? We can’t find a pro record for Van Hove, but apparently he’s also a competitive grappler, where he’s had a little more success. You can watch him choke out a couple of opponents here and here.

Previously: Sign of the Apocalypse #631: Dwarf Cage Fighting

(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

In a new tribute/report titled "The Man That Was ‘Mask’," Sherdog adds some backstory to the tragic death of TapouT founder Charles Lewis Jr. As it turns out, Lewis was as sober as Jeffrey Kirby was drunk, and the street-racing theory is probably off-base as well. Here’s what we know now:

A criminal trial for Kirby is tentatively scheduled for next month.

(You guys know this thing doesn’t even count, right?)

When the Nevada State Athletic Commission ruled yesterday to change Karo Parisyan’s decision win over Dong Hyun Kim at UFC 94 into a “no decision” on account of the various painkillers running through Parisyan’s veins at the time of the fight, I wondered the same thing I always wonder: how does this affect me?

As you may recall, I put a bet down on Kim when I was going crazy in Vegas the day before UFC 94.  I lost and was forced to dance for nickels under a bridge just to get enough money to make it home.  But with the bout result changed, did the MGM Grand now owe me my money back?  Were they also on the hook for the price of the tetanus shot I had to get when I got home (those nickels aren’t clean, no matter what anyone tells you)?  

I didn’t know, so I called the MGM Grand.  Turns out, they didn’t really know either.  After a lengthy back and forth, they gave up and told me to call the sportsbook at the Mirage, whose policies the MGM Grand follows on this sort of thing.  So I did.  I called the Mirage and got transferred around a bunch.  I got told several different times that the sportsbook didn’t take calls, but my question confused enough people, and eventually they put me through to the sportsbook, where my hopes were immediately shot down.

(Worst Affliction t-shirt ever?  Or best Slash t-shirt ever?)

Following his dismal performance at UFC 92 and subsequent release from the UFC (at his request, which is like telling your boss you quit immediately after he’s discovered that you’ve been stealing), Dean Lister is headed back where he belongs: grappling tournaments.  Lister will be back at the Abu Dhabi’s and word has it that he’s angling for a move up in weight to take on Fedor Emelianenko, who’s expected to enter this year.

On one hand, it’s good to see Lister back in his element.  As great a submissions fighter as he is, he’s not much of an MMA fighter at this point.  He tried to pull guard on Yushin Okami for three rounds and got a chorus of boos for his trouble.  He then apologized to his fans while reminding us that he could kick all of our asses, just in case you were in any danger of feeling sympathy for him.

But Lister is a middleweight.  Fedor is a heavyweight.  Even if he weren’t also one of the best fighters on the planet, the weight difference is already a huge advantage.  But would it be pretty awesome to see Fedor in a pure grappling match against one of America’s best pure grapplers?  It would.  He tapped out his brother with no problem, but "The Boogeyman" has a significantly better grappling resume.  He is also free of blood-borne diseases (sorry, had to do it).

Regardless, a Fedor/Lister grappling match has the potential to get even the more casual MMA viewers slightly interested in the Abu Dhabi’s.  And that’s without the brutal violence of MMA, Bob Reilly.  What now?

(He thought wearing the t-shirt would bring him joy, but still he felt a profound melancholy. Props: FiveOuncesofPain)

MMA Cube passes along a translation of a recent blog post by Aleksander Emelianenko, in which the ex-Red Devil fighter talks about his plans for the future, while denying rumors of his criminal history and health issues. No surprises there, really. Though this part was kind of interesting:

UFC, huh? Of course Aleksander would have to complete his three-fight U.S.-exclusive contract with Affliction first, and he’s fulfilled zero of those three fights so far. But you have to believe that Dana White would want to sign Aleks to the UFC as a thumb in the eye to his brother Fedor. Oh! Delicious! By the way, not to beat a dead horse, but Aleks could totally compete in America if it came down to it: