(It’s okay, Chris.  I sometimes pass out while combing my hair, too.  Photo courtesy of UFC.com)

The last time I got a hot tip on a fight was when my grandfather became confused and kept insisting that I put everything I had on Jack Dempsey to beat Gunboat Smith.  In his defense, he was right, but I guess that’s not the point.  Cagewriter’s Steve Cofield says the spread of some inside info about Chris Leben helped narrow the betting line on his fight with Jake Rosholt at UFC 102.  Cofield quotes Yahoo’s Kevin Iole as saying that a “prominent fighter” told him that he was betting on Rosholt because he knew that “Leben hadn’t trained at all.”

While MMA is a wild bag of unpredictable tricks inside the cage, once the fighting stops it’s still the same familiar newsreel over and over again.  That’s why we weren’t at all surprised to hear that Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira would like a shot at Brock Lesnar’s UFC heavyweight title, or that he thinks his experience would be the key to beating the big man:

"A lot of jiu-jitsu and good standing up, make him tired man, move around, move around.  When I get his timing, hit him with a good right hand and box him, box him and get him tired. …I’m kind of calm.  I can listen to my coach.  I’ve been in there a long time.  I can see what’s going on.  I have more experience than him.  That’s a big advantage I have. …If he goes on the top into my guard, I can play with him.  Let’s see, let’s see what is going to happen."

First of all, if hot-headed homophobe Brock Lesnar even hears that Nogueira mentioned a desire to “play with him,” things are going to get ugly.  Fortunately, he doesn’t have the internet, so we should be fine.  Second of all, we know Nogueira has beaten some behemoths in his time, but that doesn’t mean he could do the same to Lesnar, for a couple of reasons.

(Props: Altofsky)

According to Mike Goldberg, Todd Duffee‘s seven-second pwnage of Tim Hague at UFC 102 was "officially the fastest knockout in UFC history." Previously, the company line was that James Irvin and Don Frye held the record jointly with their eight-second knockouts of Houston Alexander and Thomas Ramirez, respectively. But hardcore fans know the truth. Above is a gif of Duane "Bang" Ludwig‘s knockout of Jonathan Goulet at UFC Fight Night 3, in which Mario Yamasaki rushes in to save the starched Canadian at the four-second mark. So why don’t we ever hear about it? Well, the timekeeper effed up and reported the official time of the stoppage as 11 seconds. And that’s still how they have the time listed on UFC.com and Sherdog. Duffee may have given us one of the most fearsome Octagon debuts since Tank Abbott, but at the very least his "record" should have an asterisk next to it…

(Highlights from the 2007 ADCC tourney. For part 2, click here.)

The ultra-prestigious invitation-only Abu Dhabi Combat Club Submission Fighting World Championships — which takes place every two years — kicks off September 26th in Barcelona, with a host of familiar names in the brackets. Read on to see who will be battling for the biggest bragging rights in the grappling world during the upcoming 2009 edition. Props to Fightlinker and Japan MMA for the tips…

Female -60kg:
Kyra Gracie, Brazil (2007 women’s -59kg winner)
Sayaka Shioda, Japan (2007 women’s -55kg winner)
Megumi Fujii, Japan
Michelle Tavares, Brazil
Laurence Cousin, France
Ina Steffensen, Denmark
Hillary Williams, USA
Luanna Alzuguir, Brazil

Female 60kg+:
Hannette Staack, USA (2007 women’s Absolute and -67kg winner)
Penny Thomas, USA (2007 women’s 67kg+ winner)
Hitomi Hiraiwa, Japan
Rosângela Conceição, Brazil
Ida Hansson, Sweden
Shanti Abelha, Denmark
Lana Stephanac, USA
Cristiane "Cris Cyborg" Santos, Brazil

(Dammit, Ed.  You start yawning like that and pretty soon the whole arena will be doing it.  Photo courtesy of UFC.com)

Following his loss via injury TKO at UFC 102, Ed Herman has been suspended indefinitely until he gets cleared by a doctor, which may not happen until he gets some surgery and does a little rehab.  Herman went down in agony in the second round of his fight with Aaron Simpson, but according to what he told The Columbian, the actual troubles started earlier in the night:

"I’m pretty sure my knee’s torn out.  I felt it buckle underneath me in the first round.  I just tried to fight through it.  Then it buckled again."

So what does the UFC do with a mid-level guy who’s going to be laid up for a little while?  You’d like to think that they’ll keep him on the roster and wait for him to recover and give it another go.  You’d also like to think that they wouldn’t cut every single losing fighter from the UFC 101 undercard, so maybe we should keep our expectations realistic.  Get well soon, "Short Fuse."

(What do you get when you have a big left hand and not much else? One highlight in a losing effort. Photo courtesy of SI.com)

This week the Potato Index confronts one of mankind’s oldest problems as we sort through the UFC 102 aftermath, and it goes a little something like this: How much does a fighter’s stock drop if he loses after getting his testicles kicked up into his throat?  On one hand, a TKO loss never results in a rise on the Potato Index’s arbirtrary numerical rankings scale, but on the other, simply not quitting and going off to sob in a dark corner is an accomplishment.  The answer to this age-old question, and others, awaits you.

Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira +213
So you thought Big Nog was done just because he looks like he’s a senior citizen and fought like one against Frank Mir?  Anybody can have a bad night.  He showed on Saturday that he’s still got some bullets in the old gun, at least as long as he’s fighting representatives from the UFC’s AARP wing.  Unless someone wants to see him killed, though, please keep him far away from Brock Lesnar.

Randy Couture -56
It’s hard to be too critical of a gutsy performance like that one.  He didn’t look old or haggard, and didn’t lose because he was too slow or too weak.  He just wasn’t the better fighter that night.  Now we wait to find out what’s next, and whether the UFC really plans to give him two more years worth of fights, or if it’s just a way of keeping him off the Strikeforce roster.

(Props: YouTube.com/UFC. For part one of the 8/29 Randyvlog, which features Couture’s pre-fight preparation, visits from Wanderlei Silva and Brock Lesnar, and Randy’s walkout, click here.)

If you’re going to lose a fight, you might as well do it surrounded by people who love you. Randy Couture — who described Saturday night in Portland as the loudest audience he’s ever fought in front of — was given a hero’s reception by all the fans in attendance at UFC 102 as well as everyone he came across backstage. The above video-blog shows excerpts from his fight against Nogueira shot cageside (right behind the guy with the airhorn!), as well as the aftermath, in which Randy is examined by a doctor and takes questions at the post-event press conference. It’s hard to predict where Couture’s fight career will go from here, but with fan response this overwhelmingly positive, the Natural’s days of high-profile fights in the Octagon are far from over.

(Even when you’ve knocked your opponent into a 180-degree tailspin, the Bad Boy eyes are always watching. Photo courtesy of Tracy Lee via Cagewriter.)

The UFC paid out $1,525,000 in reported salaries and bonuses for UFC 102, with the night’s headliners taking home just over half of the total. The numbers are below. Keep in mind that they don’t include income from sponsorships, cuts of the pay-per-view revenue (which Randy Couture reportedly receives), or the UFC’s shadowy "locker room bonuses" (which Silva and Duffee likely got a taste of).

– Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira: $460,000 (includes $150,000 win bonus and $60,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
– Randy Couture: $310,000 (includes $60,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
– Nate Marquardt: $140,000 (includes $40,000 win bonus and $60,000 Knockout of the Night bonus)
– Gabriel Gonzaga: $120,000 (includes $60,000 win bonus)
– Jake Rosholt: $86,000 (includes $13,000 win bonus and $60,000 Submission of the Night bonus)
– Brandon Vera: $70,000 (includes $35,000 win bonus)
– Thiago Silva: $58,000 (includes $29,000 win bonus)
– Keith Jardine: $55,000

(Even Couture’s best Jughead impression failed to impress the judges. Photo courtesy of the LA Times.)

Turns out that all our speculation as to what the UFC might do with Randy Couture for the last fight on his contract is now totally obsolete, because Captain America has re-upped for another six fights and twenty-eight months.  The extension will take the 46 year-old conceivably into early 2012, when we assume that UFC events will be held somewhere deep within the earth in order to help fans get their minds off the harsh, post-apocalyptic hellscape on the surface.  Said Couture:

“I am going to take it one fight at a time as I did 12 years ago when I first started this thing, and we will see where that goes.  Obviously I didn’t have the outcome that I wanted [tonight] but I still had a good performance overall. I think I did a lot of things that I trained to do in this fight tonight. We will evaluate that, see what I need to improve and we will take it one fight at a time.”

(Props: MMA-Core)

Depending on your interpretation of what you see here, either Chris Leben couldn’t decide whether he wanted to tap out to Jake Rosholt’s arm-triangle choke, or else he passed out mid-tap.  Either way, Yves Lavigne came very close to committing the same sin that he did in the Matt Brown/Pete Sell fight.  Watch as he almost jumps in and then backs off when Leben’s legs buck up.  First you think that leg movement is some kind of half-assed attempt at an escape.  Then you watch Leben involuntarily flopping around during his post-fight nap, and it seems like maybe he was already out at that point. 

Tough night for the fighters from Portland.  Maybe the big question is, will Leben and Ed Herman still have jobs after the UFC’s trip into their hometown?

(‘Wait, what happened to that dude Frank Mir beat up?’/Photo courtesy SI.com)

Dana White referred to each of his picks for the end-of-the-night bonuses at UFC 102 as “no-brainers.”  The UFC handed some extra cash for Fight of the Night to Randy Couture and Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira for their main event scrap, Jake Rosholt for his submission/choke-out of Chris Leben, and Nate Marquardt for his one-punch KO of Demian Maia.  The bonuses this time around were worth $60,000, severely disappointing Nogueira, who, after UFC 100, was under the impression that these bad boys would be worth a cool $102,000.  Looks like that giant marble statue of a Minotaur that he was planning on putting in his front yard is going to have to wait until his investments mature.

The UFC reported 16,088 fans for a live take of $1.92 million.  Though ticket sales weren’t as strong as the UFC might have liked, Dana White said in the post-fight press conference that they’d come back to the Pacific Northwest soon, probably to Seattle next and eventually back to Portland.  Next time around, maybe they’ll keep ticket prices more in line with what people here are willing to pay, or else load up the card with some fights that might entice more out-of-towners.

("So, I feel that I’ll be comfortable wherever the fight goes, and as long as I can stick to my gameplan and — Shawn, if you don’t get that Flip Cam out of my face, I’m going to stomp you a new asshole. Seriously. Last warning." Photo courtesy of this set on Combat Lifestyle.)

The word "legend" gets thrown around a lot in this sport, to the point where it loses much of its meaning. Well, we won’t bother with the cliches. Suffice it to say that two old dudes are going to fight in Portland tonight, and one of them is so old that it’s hard to believe he’s still fighting, and the other is actually more old-looking than old, and maybe it would have been better if they fought like five years ago, in a city where people could actually afford to go see it, but here we are, and what are you gonna do.

Elsewhere on the card, Keith Jardine and Thiago Silva clash in a high-profile light-heavyweight scrap, while Nate Marquardt and Demian Maia fight for what may or may not turn out to be a #1 middleweight contender spot. Live UFC 102 results await you after the jump; refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest. Let’s have a good, clean liveblog. Obey all my instructions, and protect yourself at all times. If you want to order pizza, do it now, and go back to your couches.

("That was me, Gabriel Gonzaga, before I joined Nutrisystem and Alcoholics Anonymous." Photo courtesy of this set on Combat Lifestyle.)

Spoilers after the jump…

(Fight starts at the 4:22 mark. Props: MMA Linker)

As expected, Muhammed Lawal‘s pimpin’ ring entrance took longer than his actual fight against Mark Kerr last night at M-1 Breakthrough in Kansas City, with the flashy Team Quest product needing just 25 seconds to steamroll the fighter formerly known as "The Smashing Machine." King Mo pounced for a single-leg as Kerr tried to throw a leg kick, then took his 263-pound opponent to the canvas and started slugging him in the head until Kerr was knocked out. I guess the oddsmakers know how to do their jobs after all.

Also on the card, Fedor Emelianenko and Gegard Mousasi went through the motions with their "sparring exhibition," which never came close to looking anything like a real fight, except for the end when Fedor won by armbar. That video and complete results from the event are after the jump…

(Mike Russow chats with Cage Writer on the eve of his planned execution of Justin McCully.)

- Couture is 220 lbs., Nogueira 231 lbs., everyone makes weight. (Fanhouse)

- "Rampage" Jackson might be in "The A-Team" after all, and might be out of December fight with Rashad Evans. (Fighters Only)

- A sort of creepy, in-depth look at Thiago Silva’s wife. (Fightlinker)

- UFC 102 "Countdown" ratings aren’t spectacular. (MMA Payout)

- Head-to-head UFC 102 picks, and look who’s in first place. (CBS Sports)

- Randy Couture’s video blog strikes again. (MMA Frenzy)

- Dana White backing away from Silva-St. Pierre fight. (The Score)

- UFC to head to Vancouver in June of 2010. (MMA Mania)

- Go commando, get girls. (TSB Magazine)

- The 7 worst things guys do in public bathrooms. (Asylum)

- Denver Broncos suspend Brandon Marshall. (Scores Report)

- Rob Zombie’s pseudo-deep thoughts. (Ask Men)

- Stop calling Bill O’Reilly a homo. (Holy Taco)

- "Final Destination" death montage. (Screen Junkies)

- Robocop riding a unicorn. (Made Man)

- Danica Patrick nude? (All Left Turns)

- Vicious fight at Bolivian soccer match. (Nothing Toxic)

(Props: ShoSports)

Twelve days after her crushing loss to Cris Cyborg — and subsequent disappearance from the cage — Gina Carano took to her MySpace blog to begin the healing process. Yes, she’s still alive, and yes, she plans on rebounding from the first defeat of her career:

(Props: spicadocious via Fightlinker)

This kickass highlight reel — which could also be titled "Rise of the Whitemare" — covers DREAM’s welterweight grand prix from earlier this year, in which Marius Zaromskis smashed his way to the top of an eight-man field that also included such notables as Hayato Sakurai, Shinya Aoki, and Andre Galvao. Highlights include Zaromskis’s fake-flying-knee superman punch at the 2:39 mark, and of course his knockout-of-the-year candidate against Jason High at the 4:19 mark. DREAM returns on October 8th with the semifinals and finals of its featherweight grand prix, the second round of the Super Hulk Tournament, and the lightweight title fight between Joachim Hansen and Shinya Aoki.

After the jump: Anderson Silva shows off his boxing skills against a local pugilist at Freddie Roach’s boxing club.

(For reasons that are still unclear, "Neanderthal Knight Rider" never got picked up by any major network.)

Former Smashing Machine Mark Kerr is forty years old, riding a four-fight losing streak, and weighing a not-so svelt 263 for his fight with "King Mo" Lawal at tonight’s troubled M-1 "Breakthrough" event.  You can decide for yourself which of those factors played the primary role in making him an almost comical 8-1 underdog in this fight.  BetUs currently has Kerr at +800, while Lawal is going off at -1600.  If you’re not much of a gambler, let us just tell you that that’s basically like oddsmakers saying there’s a better chance of Kerr’s head exploding on the walk down to the ring than there is of him winning this fight.

(They never sleep and they’ll never die.)

Well, here we are once again.  Time to battle it out over questions of who should keep it up and who should pack it in, how the UFC might get around Portland’s weak economy and ridiculous taxes in order to fill an arena, and so much more.

Who will win tomorrow’s main event? Subquestions: Is the winner worthy of a title shot and should the loser retire?

BG: I got Randy on this one. Both guys are coming off ugly losses, but while Couture’s could be chalked up to his massive size disadvantage against Brock Lesnar, Nogueira’s loss against Frank Mir seemed to be result of slowing reflexes and a softening of his famously iron-clad chin. Come to think of it, there’s a common theme in all three of Big Nog’s UFC appearances — he’s taken a lot of hard blows to the head, many of which have knocked him down, and he doesn’t seem to be able to do anything about it. Meanwhile, there’s nothing to suggest that Randy Couture can’t still be competitive against someone closer to his own size, and I think he can score a late TKO or unanimous decision over Nogueira with his striking and trademark clinch-boxing.
 
That being said, I have no desire to see Couture face Brock Lesnar again. They’re just not in the same weight class, and their first fight left no questions unanswered. Hopefully Dana White understands that there’s better uses for a legend like Couture then throwing him against the same brick wall. Of course, I could see Randy getting another crack at the belt if someone else manages to take it from Lesnar in the near future. And yeah, maybe Nogueira should retire if he loses tomorrow. He’s only 33, but after 10 years of wars, he looks and fights like he’s older than Randy. Risking more brain trauma is probably not in his best interest.

BF: I’m also taking Couture, but not because I think Nogueira has one foot in the grave, as you seem to believe.  I just think that Couture is the worst possible style match-up for him.  We all know that he wasn’t 100% against Frank Mir, but he’s supposedly doing better now and even at his worst he can take a beating, which is part of his problem.  But really, I don’t see how he mounts any effective offense against Couture.

("One more question, then I gotta get the fuck out of here. Yes, Helen Thomas. What’s on your mind, gorgeous?" Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

The UFC held a press conference yesterday in Portland to discuss tomorrow night’s UFC 102 card, as well as other issues related to the organization’s future. Some highlights…

– Even though the UFC already has two events slated for November — UFC 105 (11/14, Manchester) and UFC 106 (11/21, Las Vegas) — Dana White revealed that a third November show was in the works, to be headlined by the lightweight championship fight between BJ Penn and Diego Sanchez; Penn/Sanchez was originally reported as the main event for #105. And get this: White said the tentative third November event wouldn’t be broadcast on pay-per-view or Spike. Could a network TV deal be in the works? “Wait and see boys… if I can pull this one off,” White said. "We’ve never had more [network] interest than right now. Obviously, I think all the hard work we’ve done over nine years and UFC 100 had a big part in it, too. I’m pretty confident we’re gonna have a deal very, very soon. I like what I’m hearing now more than I ever did before."

– Dana White may seem determined to counter-program Strikeforce to extinction, but his hostility has nothing to do with Scott Coker. Honestly. As he told reporters, “I’m not anti-Strikeforce, I don’t dislike those guys. I dislike Showtime, that’s who I dislike. I think they’re dicks, I don’t like them. I don’t like their attitude; they think they are better than they really are…The guy over at Showtime who I’m talking about knows who he is and I dislike him very much and my beef is with him, not really Strikeforce. They sucked at boxing, they got their ass kicked by HBO always at boxing yet they tried to stay in it. They got their ass kicked by HBO in programming, but they’re still around and they’re going to get their ass kicked in mixed martial arts too, just not by HBO.”

(Props: M1mixfight via MiddleEasy)

…and as you can see, the size difference is positively Couture/Lesnar-esque. Not that a size advantage helped Tim Sylvia against Fedor last July, but then again Sylvia is a clumsy oaf with doo-doo in his pants, and the Grim is an undefeated head-bussa with Ambien in his fists. Still no word on exactly when the Emelianenko/Rogers fight will go down, but the Strikeforce/M-1 crew is getting a head-start on filming promos for it, and arranged this face-off yesterday in New York. As for the Grim, he knows he’ll be The Man if he manages to score an upset against Fedor, telling MMA Fanhouse:

(Between the Frank Mir fight and "Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot," I’d say some apologies are in order. I’ll let you gentlemen decide who would like to go first.)

Gambling ain’t what it used to be in the city of Portland.  The dogs don’t run at the old Multnomah Greyhound Track anymore, so you’ll have to find somewhere else to get stabbed with a pocketknife.  The Oregon lottery just doesn’t give you that sweet, out-of-control feeling you crave.  Even the place where I used to go and watch the occasional cockfight has closed its doors.  Thankfully, UFC 102 is coming down this weekend and bringing plenty of action with it.  Let’s take a look, shall we?

Betting lines come to us courtesy of BestFightOdds.com:

Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira (+150) vs. Randy Couture (-160)
Keith Jardine (-140) vs. Thiago Silva (+130)
Demian Maia (+157) vs. Nate Marquardt (-160)
Brandon Vera (-190) vs. Krzysztof Soszynski (+175)
Chris Leben (-135) vs. Jake Rosholt (+125)
Chris Tuchscherer (+301) vs. Gabriel Gonzaga (-345)
Justin McCully (+249) vs. Mike Russow (-260)
Tim Hague (+145) vs. Tom Duffee (-150)
Ed Herman (-130) vs. Aaron Simpson (+119)
Mark Munoz (-200) vs. Nick Catone (+190)
Evan Dunham (+120) vs. Marcus Aurelio (-140)

The breakdown…

(Props: Redneck)

You may have heard stories about Mark Hunt and his legendary granite chin, but unless you go back and watch some of his old K-1 fights, you’ll never truly understand. The Super Samoan’s decision loss to fellow New Zealander Ray Sefo at the K-1 World GP 2001 in Fukuoka, Japan, was a slugfest for the ages, in which Hunt repeatedly invited Sugarfoot Sefo to haul off at his face, and absorbed point-blank right hooks and axe kicks without so much as a flinch. Sefo may have gotten the nod from the judges that night, but Hunt was far from beaten. "You never got me down, Ray" indeed.

Part two of the fight is above. Click here for part one.

(You know why that girl is covering up her cooch with her cell phone? Because she’s classy. Photo courtesy of picapp.)

From moviesblog.mtv.com:

Ugh. Consider us pwned once again. The Sun — which has given us such stellar reporting as Chuck Liddell vs. Anderson Silva at UFC 95 and Chuck Liddell vs. Randy Couture at UFC 99 — is almost never reliable, and we’re going to take a break from believing anything they say until further notice. For example, this report about a 1-1 draw in a soccer match between Olomouc and Everton? Horseshit.

Unfortunately, this means that the role of B.A. Baracus will probably go to a rapper like 50 Cent or The Game, who just don’t have the same gruff, opinionated vibe as Mr. T. Not casting Rampage feels like a missed opportunity. Anybody want to launch a petition to convince The A-Team‘s producers to give him the role?

(Nothing says, ‘I regret that gang rape now that I’ve been arrested for it almost two decades later,’ quite like this mug shot expression.)

Gather ’round, Potato Nation.  It’s question and answer time.  We’ve got some good ones and some positively awful ones this time around, and we’re equally excited about both.  But don’t just be a selfish consumer of questions.  Head on over to this forum thread and ask a query of your own.  If you don’t, we’ll never forgive you.  Sure, we’ll pretend to have forgiven you, but really we’ll just be holding on to that hurt, waiting for the right time to use it against you.

I’m sure this opinion question has come up before, but I’m too lazy to check past posts. Besides, I have a timely reason for asking…I like Florian, and I still think he has a good chance tonight [ed. note: Geez, we gotta answer these more often] against BJ. But whenever I watch Kenny’s "dressed as a samurai" entrance, I cringe. He looks like he bought the costume in the bargain box of the children’s section of Halloween Adventure.

Lots of fighters try to come up with outfits and special routines for their ring entrances. Sometimes they work. Sometimes they don’t. But I can’t think of any worse than Kenny’s.  Can you top it? What would you say is the most embarrassing ring entrance? – Horror Fighter 

It’s interesting that you use the word ‘embarrassing,’ Horror Fighter.  Seems to us that the best way for a fighter to embarrass himself after an elaborate entrance is to lose, while if he wins it usually comes off okay.  For example, when Dave Kaplan came bopping out to the sounds of “Tenderness” by General Public, that seemed kind of cool.  Then he got his ass kicked by Junie Browning and suddenly it seemed way less cool.  Of course, a really ballsy, well-planned, and clearly rehearsed entrance like Akihiro Gono’s Rockettes routine has the ability to surpass victory or defeat. 

(Yep, that’s about where most of those guys who said they were going to keep it standing usually end up.)

When I spoke to Demian Maia for an SI.com feature on his fight with Nate Marquardt at UFC 102 this weekend, he seemed resigned to the knowledge that everyone, including his opponent, knows exactly what he wants to do when he steps in the Octagon.  He also doesn’t really care, why should he?  It’s worked perfectly so far, and if he can extend his record to a perfect 11-0 in Portland, Oregon on Saturday night, he just might earn himself a title shot.  At least, he thinks so.

We haven’t seen you in the Octagon since your victory over Chael Sonnen back in February.  How has your training progressed since then and how has the preparation for this bout gone?

Training was perfect.  Can’t be better.  I’m working with the same guys I always work with.  Wanderlei Silva, my boxing coach, my wrestling coach, and all the guys who support me and help me for every fight.

Do you think Nate Marquardt will try to avoid going to the ground with you at all costs, or do you think he believes in his ground game enough to match up with you there?

("He’s at that age where he won’t listen to a word we say. He’ll come home past midnight and tell us he was ‘out with friends.’ Which friends are these? The friends he used to have were good boys, who followed the rules. I feel like I don’t even know my own son anymore." Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

According to a tweet by Fanhouse’s Michael David Smith, Kenny Florian is likely to face off against Clay Guida at UFC 106. Sounds like logicial matchmaking to us: Florian previously expressed that he wanted to rebound from his loss to BJ Penn by fighting "someone tough" before the end of the year, while Guida once called out Ken-Flo as one of the UFC’s protected fighters. ("They hold him up on a pedestal, man, and I’m ready to kick that pedestal out from underneath him.") We wouldn’t expect the kind of once-in-a-lifetime brawl that Guida had against Diego Sanchez, but it would be a solid addition to a card that already features the heavyweight title fight between Brock Lesnar and Shane Carwin, and a light-heavyweight co-headliner between Tito Ortiz and Mark Coleman. So what do you think — does Florian finish this fight, or does Guida win via Clay-n-Pray?

(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

Fedor Emelianenko doesn’t talk trash about his opponents, and he won’t be starting now. After his autograph session yesterday afternoon, Fedor told Ariel Helwani that he sees Brett Rogers as a great opponent with "very heavy knockout punch." And he doesn’t even get pissed off when Ariel brings up the argument that he signed with Strikeforce to duck the top competition in the UFC: "I do not read all the rumors and gossips which they publish on the Internet, but to tell the truth, the offer of the UFC was really not the worthy one, and if they are able to give us really good offer, we definitely would agree." Finally, Fedor rejects the notion that he has anything to prove against Rogers.

As for the Grim? He’s just enjoying the ride…

Fedor Emelianenko Open Workout in NYC – Watch more Funny Videos

As mentioned earlier, Fedor Emelianenko visited Fighthouse Gym in New York City today to hit pads for a few minutes and sign autographs for fans. The open-workout portion of the appearance was very brief: Fedor fired some punches at Fighthouse’s resident Muay Thai pro Brandon Levi, struggled with a bizarre piece of training equipment called a "jump rope," then threw more punches at a heavy bag before deciding to give it a rest and set up shop at a signing table. Video of the action is above.

Before the workout, Emelianenko took questions from the press in attendance. Some highlights, via his interpreter…

There was some discussion about this in the forums a while back, but here’s a video clip of Alistair Overeem proving that he knows how to treat a lady, assuming that lady is into being dominated and doesn’t mind a little pain.  This is from some weird Dutch website (a redundant phrase, we know), and we have no clue what they’re saying, but the general idea seems to be that Overeem beats up some cute reporter while she maintains a positive attitude and somehow only becomes more attractive throughout the assault.  Or at least she’s putting on a good front for the camera, just like our girl did when "Rampage" Jackson tried to put a baby in her. 

Christ, the things women have to deal with just to get an interview in this sport.  Really makes us glad that we’re too unattractive for anyone to want to touch us inappropriately.  Not that it wouldn’t be flattering if someone would at least give it a shot every now and then…