(The temptation to suggest a tickle fight for the belt must have been damn near overwhelming for Scott Coker.)

As Strikeforce bravely soldiers on toward what was supposed to be an epic event on Showtime before being brought back down to earth via a gypsy curse, it’s time we take a look at the fights oddsmakers are still offering betting lines on.  With Jesse Taylor in as a replacement for Nick Diaz against Jay Hieron, most online bookmakers are staying away from it at the moment.  Either they feel poet laureate “JT Money” is too much of an unknown quantity as a last-minute replacement, or they just assume that Nick Diaz will show up on fight night, stoned out of his mind, and refuse to allow this fight to go on without him.  We’re hoping for the latter.

The most favorable lines on the internet come to us courtesy of BestFightOdds.com:

Gina Carano (+161) vs. Cris “Cyborg” Santos (-170)
Renato “Babalu” Sobral (+200) vs. Gegard Mousasi (-205)
Mitsuhiro Ishida (+200) vs. Gilbert Melendez (-215)
Mike Kyle (+435) vs. Fabricio Werdum (-515)

The breakdown…

(Well done, Fightlinker.)

Last night a friend of mine sent me this disturbing report about a downward trend in sales for Bud Light, suggesting that the company might post its first annual sales decline in its 27-year history.  The authors of this article seem to think it’s the wordsmiths behind the “Drinkability” campaign that are responsible, but we know better.  Obviously this is the work of Brock Lesnar.  His anti-Bud Light tirade at UFC 100 (and subsequent pseudo-apology) has clearly turned the American consumer against the brewer, despite Barack Obama’s best efforts.

Hope you’re happy, Lesnar.  With great power comes great responsibility, no matter how effective your choice of chest tattoo is at letting people know that you are not to be viewed as a role model under any circumstances.  Though we should probably just be glad that he didn’t go off on a rant about Condom Depot.  The last thing we need during a recession is an outbreak of Chlamydia and babies.  

(Props: CageWriter)

Now that the dust has settled on his second unsuccessful run at a UFC lightweight title, it’s time for Kenny Florian to look to the future and learn from the mistakes of his past. In this interview with ProMMARadio, Florian blames his long layoff for his submission loss to BJ Penn at UFC 101, and hopes to get back in cage right away against a tough opponent. Some highlights:

On ring rust: "I didn’t think it would be a factor, just because I stayed busy throughout, I was training hard…but it definitely was. Being almost nine months away from the cage, it hurt me. With my striking, it’s always an issue…I just found that I couldn’t get my range and my timing going during the fight, and felt I wasn’t effective there. I just felt uncomfortable with my striking."

On how he was doing until he lost: "I figured that I definitely won the second and third [rounds]. The first, he caught me with a good shot, but I was kind of off-balance so it looked like I got knocked down…Going into the fourth, obviously, with where he ended up with the takedown on top, I knew he was obviously going to win that round and my goal was trying to survive and just try to make it to the fifth where I’d be able to push and try to squeeze out the win…the commissioner came over to me and said that a couple of the judges had me winning the first couple rounds, I was two to one, or one of the judges had me all three, I don’t know exactly what happened, but he told me that a couple of the judges may have had me winning."

(The Hallman/Hughes story. Could Matt Hughes be getting one more shot at revenge before he retires?)

— Anderson Silva‘s manager Ed Soares has debunked a report by Yahoo! Sports in which he was quoted as saying Silva wanted to give up his middleweight title to compete as a light-heavyweight permanently. As Soares told MMA Weekly: “It’s not true. I never said that to Dana. I have said to Dana that he’d like to fight again at 205 (but not permanently)…he wants the biggest fights possible, whether it’s at 205 or 185.” Silva and Soares still aren’t psyched about an impending rematch with Dan Henderson: "I feel a true number one (middleweight contender) would be if Henderson fought the winner of Nate Marquardt and Damian Maia…we could take another fight at 205 or a catchweight fight (in the meantime).”

— For the fourth time in his career, Dennis "Superman" Hallman has signed a contract to fight in the UFC. He expects to make his next UFC appearance sometime this fall. Hallman is best known for two lightning-quick submission victories over Matt Hughes, the second of which came at Hallman’s Octagon debut at UFC 29 in December 2000. The 33-year-old fighter lost subsequent UFC fights to Jens Pulver, Frank Trigg, and Jorge Rivera, and is currently on a four-fight win streak, with two of those fights taking place in Strikeforce.

(‘Now if you’ll excuse us, we need to get to the bar so we can show this to some drunk sorority girls and try to explain what the WEC is.’ Photo courtesy of SI.com)

There’s nothing worse than when a dramatic upset victory in a title fight is followed by an injury to the new champion that keeps both him and the belt sidelined for an extended period of time.  Well, actually I guess getting AIDS would be worse than that.  Or when you’re walking around your house in the middle of the night and you stub your toe.  Or losing your wallet, that really sucks.  Okay, so there are lots of things worse than having the new champ out with an injury, but it’s still a bummer.

According to the list of medical suspensions following WEC 42, new bantamweight champ Brian Bowles — who didn’t exactly get rich with Sunday’s win — broke his left hand and could be out until February of 2010.  There’s a chance that he could get it cleared by a doctor before then and render that suspension meaningless, but that’s not terribly likely unless he has special mutant bones that heal much faster than a normal human’s, possibly due to that time he was struck by lightning while holding some nuclear waste during a solar eclipse.

(Props: Mad Xyientist)

While cruising MMAMoneyline earlier today, I was rather surprised to see Gilbert Melendez as a solid favorite to beat Mitsuhiro Ishida in their Strikeforce interim lightweight title fight on Saturday. After all, Ishida defeated Melendez by decision at Yarennoka! less than two years ago. It was a very close match — and maybe the decision could have gone the other way if it didn’t take place in Ishida’s home country — but Melendez never really put Ishida in serious danger at any point in the fight (expect for when he slammed Ishida on his head, at the 4:12 mark above), nor could he find many answers for the Endless Fighter’s grappling; Ishida’s aggressive wrestling and nonstop pace was absolutely Guida-esque. On the other hand, they’ll be on Melendez’s home turf for the rematch, and Ishida is coming off a nasty TKO loss to Mizuto Hirota. It’s a pick ‘em, and the winner will take on Josh Thomson…someday. Part one of their first meeting is above, and part two is after the jump.

If it wasn’t for bad luck, Strikeforce’s upcoming “Carano vs. Cyborg” card wouldn’t have any luck at all. Despite the best intentions, some MMA events are destined to be magnets for injuries, unwelcome surprises, and other bizarre occurrences. But which events have been screwed by fate the hardest? Knock on wood, grab your crotch, and read on…

*****
#10: UFC 67: All Or Nothing, 2/3/07

The aptly-titled “All or Nothing” event was the first UFC pay-per-view in nearly a year to lack a title fight by the time it finally took place.  That’s all the more disappointing when you consider that it had two a couple months out from the event, pitting TUF “Comeback” winners Matt Serra and Travis Lutter against the champions in their respective weight classes.

The first title fight went down the drain when Georges St. Pierre injured his knee during training and had to put off the fight with Serra (and we all remember how that went when it finally happened).  Fortunately they still had Anderson Silva vs. Travis Lutter to fall back on…right?  Only Lutter failed to make weight for his title shot, downgrading his “Rocky” storyline to a “Bad News Bears” one.  Instead they just had themselves a normal old three-rounder, with Lutter holding his own in the first round before getting triangled/elbowed to death in the second. What fun.

#9: UFC 98: Evans vs. Machida, 5/23/09

The event that famously launched “the Machida Era” only included Lyoto as a last resort. Originally, the card was to be headlined by the heavyweight title scrap between Brock Lesnar and Frank Mir, until Mir informed the UFC that he was still recovering from knee surgery. The main event was then changed to a light-heavyweight title fight between Rashad Evans and Quinton “Rampage” Jackson, but Jackson — who had just gone the distance with Keith Jardine two months earlier — bowed out due to lingering hand and jaw injuries. And so, the UFC decided to give a well-deserved light-heavyweight title shot to that weird Brazilian guy with the unibrow.

If you’re Rashad Evans, that would be enough to make this one of the unluckiest fight cards ever. But UFC 98’s string of setbacks extended to the supporting cast as well. Josh Koscheck pulled out of the event due to a broken toe and was replaced by Brock Larson; Koscheck’s scheduled opponent, Chris Wilson, missed the show because of incomplete paperwork. James “Born Under a Bad Sign” Irvin suffered one of his many knee injuries and was replaced by Xavier Foupa-Pokam. Yushin Okami also went down with a dodgy knee and was replaced by Chael Sonnen. And finally, hard-luck-case Houston Alexander broke his hand during training and was replaced by Krzysztof Soszynski. Later, it was discovered that the MGM Grand Garden Arena had been built on an Indian burial ground.

In this video Tito Ortiz takes great satisfaction in the knowledge that while he’s living it up in first class on his way to UFC 101, Chuck Liddell is back in coach with the plebes.  Yeah, that is a pretty sweet/petty victory.  The only triumph that could possibly be better in a rivalry between two pro fighters would be if you had mercilessly thrashed him in a fight for money…twice.  You take your moments where you can though, right?

Now that Ortiz is back in the UFC, it seems as if he is intent on squeezing every last ounce of publicity juice out of it, at least until he gets demolished by the ageless wonder, Mark Coleman.  Might as well buckle up and get ready.  Part two is after the jump, where Matt Serra shows up to add a little panache to this thing and Tito beats up Danny Bonaduce on his morning radio show.  Physical stunts, that’s how radio is going to reclaim the popularity it enjoyed in the early twentieth century.

By now hopefully you’ve had time to process the news that the highly-anticipated Nick Diaz/Jay Hieron Strikeforce welterweight title fight has become the unanticipated, non-title fight between Hieron and Jesse Taylor, who’s known around these parts as “Mongo.”  We figured that as long as Diaz has smoked himself out of a title fight, the rest of us might as well turn our attention to “JT Money” and make the best of a bad situation.

If you’re wondering what Taylor has been up since being ousted from the UFC, the answer is, winning fights.  Dude has won seven straight, including victories over troubled scrapper Drew Fickett (TKO via strikes in the first round) and Korean judoka Dong Sik Yoon (TKO via injury in the first minute), while also picking up titles in the King of Champions and Total Combat organizations in between.  Before we get too excited, however, we should note that his winning streak has included victories over the likes of Rico Altamirano (2-1), Gert Kocani (1-1), and Ruben Barboza (0-1), so it’s not as if he’s been lighting up a cast of grizzled veterans.

But these are just statistics.  They don’t tell us anything about the man.  For that, we must go to the treasure trove of insight and unintentionally hilarious commentary known as YoJTMoney.com.

(Props: cnovs13 via Moth2Flame)

When you watch this video of Cristiane "Cris Cyborg" Santos going through some caveman-style training at Advanced Human Movement, you don’t see a woman who’s on the verge of calling for her mommy. Cyborg is a physical dynamo. Check out the 2:39 mark, where she repeatedly picks up her husband Evangelista with a bungee rope harnessed to her back. I don’t know if I could even do that once, and I outweigh Cyborg by a solid 20 pounds of stomach fat. It’s no wonder why the Brazilian is a betting favorite by as much as -200. Anybody plan on taking Gina Carano in this one?

After the jump: Fabricio Werdum gets in a workout at AHM. Werdum will be facing despicable cheater Mike Kyle on the undercard of "Carano vs. Cyborg."

With the cobwebs finally clearing from his devastating knockout loss against Ray Mercer, Tim Sylvia will try to regain some semblance of respect against Jason Riley at Adrenaline MMA’s fourth event on September 18. Riley holds a 6-1 professional record, and went 4-0 as an amateur. All of his fights have taken place in Ohio, and he became the NAAFS heavyweight champion after knocking out Justin Black in April.

In other words, he has nowhere near the kind of high-profile, big-show experience that Tim Sylvia does. But you’ll never go broke underestimating the Maine-iac. After all, this is a a guy who weighed in at a morbidly obese 310.6 pounds for his last fight in June, and will now have to get back into legitimate fighting shape just one month from now. Will Sylvia snap his three-fight losing streak, or will Riley make his name off of the former UFC heavyweight champ?

According to NWI.com, Adrenaline IV will go down at the Mid-America Center in Council Bluffs, Iowa, and is likely to feature former UFC vets Jeremy Horn and Houston Alexander — even though Alexander hasn’t been officially released from his UFC contract yet.

(Miguel’s show money might have been better, but amateur financial planner Brian Bowles gave him some compounding interest all upside his head. Photo courtesy of Fight Magazine.)

Disclosed salary numbers are out for last night’s WEC event in Las Vegas, and though it should come as no surprise at this point, the little fellas are still just barely getting by in these lean economic times.  Here’s what the official reported payouts looked like:

Brian Bowles — $18,000 ($9,000, $9,000 to win)
Miguel Torres — $25,000
Dominick Cruz — $14,000 ($7,000 to show, $7,000 to win)
Joseph Benavidez — $12,500
Danny Castillo — $14,000 ($7,000 to show, $7,000 to win)
Ricardo Lamas — $4,000
Takeya Mizugaki — $12,000 ($6,000 to show, $6,000 to win)
Jeff Curran — $8,000
Leonard Garcia — $24,000 ($12,000 to show, $12,000 to win)
Jameel Massouh — $3,000
Cole Province — $6,000 ($3,000 to show, $3,000 to win)
Fredson Paixao — $2,000
Shane Roller — $20,000 ($10,000 to show, $10,000 to win)
Marcus Hicks — $8,000
Ed Ratcliff — $14,000 ($7,000 to show, $7,000 to win)
Phil Cardella — $3,000
Diego Nunes — $8,000 ($4,000 to show, $4,000 to win)
Rafael Dias — $4,000
Rani Yahya — $16,000 ($8,000 to show, $8,000 to win)
John Hosman — $3,000
LC Davis — $10,000 ($5,000 to show, $5,000 to win)
Javier Vasquez — $6,000

Some thoughts…

(‘I just got one question: who here has some rolling papers?’)

Nick Diaz’s love of marijuana is unabashed and well documented, but he may have finally reached the point where even he will be forced to admit that it’s a problem that is negatively affecting his life.  According to multiple reports this afternoon, Diaz failed to contact the California State Athletic Commission about rescheduling the pre-licensing drug test that he missed on Friday, which means that he will not be fighting Jay Hieron for the Strikeforce welterweight title at “Carano vs. Cyborg” this Saturday night.  

Instead, TUF 7’s Jesse “JT Money” Taylor will step in to face Hieron in a non-title affair, meaning the most troubled Strikeforce card ever just took another crippling blow.  Presumably Diaz is listening to a voicemail message from Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker right now explaining that he’s not mad at him, just very, very disappointed.  And somehow, much to his surprise, that will make Nick feel so much worse.

(Props: solidsnakebite via Reggadi)

And all this time, we thought Fedor Emelianenko was a humble dude, without a bad word to say about anybody. Well, this is what happens when you push him too far. In the above clip, Fedor and his M-1 cronies tell us how they really feel about the UFC’s paper champion. But at least they can keep a sense of humor about it. If only Hitler shared the same attitude…

(Nick’s the shirtless guy in the back who just don’t give a fuck. Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

For a card that’s already seen its share of unfortunate pull-outs, the last thing that "Carano vs. Cyborg" needed was Nick Diaz putting his welterweight title fight in danger due to his rampant marijuana addiction. And yet, rumors have been swirling since Saturday that the Diaz/Hieron match might be scrapped due to licensing issues. FiveOuncesofPain has gotten the full story from California State Athletic Commission Assistant Executive Officer Bill Douglas. It’s a long read, but a fascinating (and infuriating) one, and it awaits you after the jump.

(Photo courtesy of UFC.com)

Some frighteningly dominant performances mixed with some very mediocre ones to form this edition of the Potato Index.  Our arbitrary numerical rankings system sorts through each fighter’s rise or fall after UFC 101.  Were we the only ones who locked our door and slept with the lights on after watching Anderson Silva?  Even then we had nightmares about his fade-away jab and woke up hearing his lengthy Portuguese shout-out echoing in our ears.  Freaky.

Anderson Silva +411
Simply finishing a fight and looking like his old self again would have been enough.  Instead Silva puts on a Jedi striking display and makes a top-ten light heavyweight look like a special needs child.  Might as well go up to 205 lbs. for good now.  The middleweights have suffered enough under his reign.

Forrest Griffin -276
Maybe the most embarrassing knockout ever, and that was after about three minutes of the most one-sided fight in recent memory.  Does it help to know that it came at the hands of the sport’s pound-for-pound best?  Probably not.  Feel better, FoGriff.

(M-1 Global initially considered putting a fake mustache on Mark Kerr and hoping that no one would notice the switch, but decided against it when they couldn’t find a promotional partner to pay for half of the mustache-related expenses.)

Everyone’s favorite co-promoter M-1 Global has finally got that situation with their next event taken care of.  Though “Breakthrough” was originally scheduled to feature a fight between “King Mo” Lawal and Don Frye at the Los Angeles Convention Center, it will now feature Lawal vs. Mark Kerr at Kansas City’s Memorial Hall, according to today’s press release.  

M-1 puts the blame for the mix-up on “a partner in Los Angeles who backed out of certain commitments,” because naturally it couldn’t be the fault of such a distinguished worldwide promoter.  The people at M-1 are consummate professionals, which is why their response to Frye pulling out of the event is to straight up crucify him in their press release:

"Don Frye had a signed contract with M-1 and part of that signed commitment allowed us to change the venue if needed," said [M-1 COO Joost] Raimond. "From our perspective, Don should still be in this fight. However, for reasons that we aren’t exactly sure of, he has backed out. Don still has not provided us with a clear reason as to why he is refusing to fight.

(Doing the bird dance. Feeling the flow. Working it. Photo courtesy of LasVegasSun.)

Don’t know about y’all, but Anderson Silva‘s flawless victory over Forrest Griffin at UFC 101 made the prospect of a second fight with Dan Henderson even less interesting to me; if the Spider’s competitive days are truly numbered, I’d much rather see him rumble with guys like Quinton Jackson, Tito Ortiz, and yes, even Lyoto Machida, rather than sit through sequels to old fights. Luckily, it seems that Silva feels the same way (except for the Machida part). According to this Yahoo! Sports article, Silva’s manager Ed Soares approached UFC president Dana White after Saturday’s event and suggested that Silva vacate his middleweight title and move to light-heavyweight permanently. White was very receptive to the idea, saying:

(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Nothing lasts forever — even cold November rain, and the seemingly untouchable bantamweight championship run of Miguel Torres. No, Torres did not ruin Brian Bowles’s boyish face at last night’s WEC 42, as many (everybody?) assumed he would. Instead, Bowles nearly knocked the former champ’s mullet off during a violent belt-taking that was reminiscent of Brown vs. Faber 1.

Torres was in trouble from the beginning of the match, as Bowles sent him to the canvas with a heavy right hand. After Bowles dropped some elbows from the top, Torres was able to kick Bowles off of him. Moments later, Torres launched forward with a barrage of punches that had Bowles on his heels, but Bowles fired off a sharp right hook that dropped Torres again, and started throwing down bombs until Torres was in dreamland. Brian Bowles — who picked up a $10,000 Knockout of the Night bonus for his shocking of the world — is the new WEC bantamweight champ. “No excuses,” Torres said after the fight. “Brian is going to be a good champion, but he’ll see that the responsibilities that go along with being the champion are not easy.”

(Props: zmmajunky)

As ‘zombiekilla’ mentioned in the comments section of the last post, UFC 101‘s real Fight of the Night took place in the crowd, when a group of meatheaded douchebags got a little too caught up in the action and began warring amongst themselves. As security intervened, a female meatheaded douchebag swung her purse at some other broad, then went after her with furious Brock Lesnar-style hammerfists. Everyone in the vicinity roared their approval and watched it play out, paying no attention to the Aaron Riley/Shane Nelson scrap that was going on inside the Octagon.

And so, we must amend Dana White’s beloved four corners analogy: If people are playing soccer on one corner, basketball on the second corner, street hockey on the third corner, a bunch of drunk Philadelphians are throwing haymakers on the fourth corner, and a professional mixed martial arts contest is taking place in the center of the street, people will watch the meatheads brawl every time. That’s how we know this is the sport of the future.

Unrelated, but important: Forrest Griffin‘s camp confirmed that the fighter suffered a broken jaw and partial hearing loss during his whuppin’ at the hands of Anderson Silva, and sprinted out of the cage in order to seek immediate medical attention. Well, we’re sorry to hear that, but Quinton Jackson still thinks you’re a ‘LOSER!!’

MMA Weekly confirmed with Griffin’s management that Griffin’s jaw was not injured, but "emotionally he is definitely not dealing well with the loss."

(Props: 0fficialbjpenn)

In a night filled with some less-than-thrilling matchups, at least Anderson Silva and BJ Penn remembered that they were in Philly — and for that, they were rewarded handsomely. Silva earned a $60,000 Knockout of the Night bonus for cleaning Forrest Griffin‘s clock in the first round of their light-heavyweight feature at UFC 101, while Penn scored a Submission of the Night bonus in honor of his fourth-round rear-naked-choke of Kenny Florian. Somewhat suprisingly, additional $60,000 Fight of the Night checks went to Silva and Griffin for their match, even though it wasn’t much of a fight. UFC 101 drew a sold-out crowd of 17,411 spectators for a live gate of $3.55 million, a combat sports record for Pennsylvania. Reportedly, almost 11,000 of those fans were already in their seats by the time the first preliminary match started.

During the post-fight press conference, UFC president Dana White announced that the UFC was looking to host an event at Boston’s legendary Fenway Park by next summer; the Massachusetts state senate passed a bill to regulate MMA last month. White also said that the UFC could add another event to its schedule in October, in addition to UFC 104 (October 24th, Los Angeles). Since Fedor Emelianenko is slated to make his Strikeforce debut sometime in October, the counter-programming motives are fairly obvious here. Game on…

(Kenny Florian gives a nod to the heavens as if to say, ‘Look out, deceased sports stars.  I’m about to send you a new roommate.’ Photo courtesy UFC.com)

With Shane Nelson/Aaron Riley pushed to the pay-per-view portion and the jail cells at the Wachovia Center presumably already filled to the brim, we are primed and ready to bring you UFC 101 results and fairly obvious observational humor.  The question is, you ready for this?  If the answer is yes, hit that ‘Read more’ button, playa.  If no, then move along and go back to Googling various combinations of “adorable kittens” over and over again, like any other Saturday night.  The rest of us will be booing along with the Philly fans.

Let’s do it.  Remember to hit refresh often, cause this train is only gaining steam.

(Smile all you want, John Howard, but don’t forget to close the back door. Otherwise the Barn Cat might get in.  That’s when all hell breaks loose. Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle.)

The preliminaries are fixing to pop off in Philly and we’ve got your UFC 101 results from the undercard right here.  If you need to be told that there are spoilers after the jump, and that you should probably not click ‘Read More’ unless you want to know what happened on the unaired portion on the UFC 101 fight card, then congratulations, you are an idiot of uncommon magnitude.  Everyone else, you know what to do.  Liveblog coming soon.

(Sure, the last few decades saw boxing’s world titles become diluted to the point of being almost meaningless, but it was a boom time for the gold and leather-working industries.)

Since talk has died down recently about Roy Jones Jr. fighting Anderson Silva once his obligations to the UFC are fulfilled, seems like a good time for a cheap publicity-grabbing trip to Philly, doesn’t it?  That’s why RJJ announced via press release late Friday afternoon that he’d be attending UFC 101 tonight to see this Silva guy in action for himself.  But lest you be tempted to think it’s just a formerly great fighter wanting to enjoy the work of a currently great one, you should note that a) he sent out a goddamn press release about it, and b) of that press release, one sentence mentions Jones’ desire to see Silva fight in person, while the other two and a half paragraphs are devoted to telling you when, where, and for how much you can see his next fight with Jeff Lacy.

In other words, Jones is trying to see if he can’t get a little bit of the media spotlight devoted to UFC 101 in general, and Anderson Silva in particular, to spill on him.  We could look at that as a sign that Jones is desperate for attention in the last few years of his flagging career.  I prefer to look at it as a sign that MMA and the UFC have gotten so big time that the boxing world definitely wants some of what we got.  Can you blame them?

Don’t forget that we’ll be liveblogging tonight’s event, bringing you UFC 101 results and commentary all night long.  Meanwhile, Cage Potato reader Lebowski1976 will be enjoying the action live and in person.  How ‘bout pouring some out for the homies who couldn’t be there tonight, Lebowski.  Then go get your picture taken with the new Octagon girl.

(Their families forbade them. Society condemned them. But love compelled them. Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle’s UFC 101 weigh-in gallery.)

- Sadly, no one believes Tamdan McCrory is a fighter. (MMA Madness)

- What-if scenarios for UFC 101. (Bleacher Report)

- Strikeforce announces Tim Kennedy vs. Cyborg Santos (the dude). (MMA Weekly)

- Kenny Florian says Penn was faking it at UFC 101 weigh-ins. (Sherdog)

- Kendall Grove has hurt ribs, questionable motivation. (Bloody Elbow)

- Josh Barnett says he’d rather fight Fedor in Japan anyway. (Fight Opinion)

- Could MMA’s cost effectiveness lure network TV? (MMA Payout)

- Philly media proving receptive to MMA, UFC. (Cage Writer)

- A girl’s guide to UFC 101, for the women in your life. (Lemondrop)

- Join Asylum for a UFC party in NYC. (Asylum)

- A little full frontal never hurt anyone. (AskMen)

- If G.I. Joe worked in your office. (Holy Taco)

- How to start your own religion. (Made Man)

- Wreck of the Week: tire boy. (All Left Turns)

- If movie posters used even the bad reviews. (Screen Junkies)

- Drunk redneck chokes out other drunk redneck. (Nothing Toxic)

(Photo courtesy of UFC.com’s Natasha gallery, via Fightlinker)

Two questions here: 1) Have we reached the point yet where you all know that the new UFC Octagon girl is named Natasha Wicks and we can finally stop referring to her as the new girl?  Not yet?  Okay, we’ll give it another week or so.  2) The UFC seems to have given blondie a makeover now that she’s officially on the payroll and, I gotta admit, I liked her better before.  Gone is her unruly mop of curls, and with it her aerobics-instructor-on Red-Bull enthusiasm.  If I’m not mistaken, looks like her boobs even got bigger (or did they just stuff some extra padding in there?). 

Some before and after pictures are provided after the jump for the sake of comparison.  Because hell, it’s Friday afternoon.  What else do you have to do besides sit in front of your computer and earnestly try to to decide whether a professional model’s breasts have grown?

P.S. Following up on the departure of former Octagon girl Edith Labelle, Fighters Only claims that she got fired after calling in hungover to UFC 100.  For her sake, we hope that’s just a rumor.  That would be like Santa Claus calling in sick with heroin withdrawal on Christmas Eve.  If he were real.  And addicted to heroin.  And had huge fake tits.  You know what, just forget I ever attempted this analogy.

(Look, deadlines are deadlines, Anderson. You think you’re the only employee of the Curitiba Times with a fight this weekend? Half the guys in the sales department have fights this weekend. And for God’s sake, buy a real tape recorder. / Photo courtesy of LasVegasSun.com.)

Weigh-ins for UFC 101: Declaration went down moments ago at the Wachovia Center in Philadelphia, with all fighters coming in at or below their contracted limits. No real surprises, expect for when Amir Sadollah cruised in at a somewhat worrisome 166.5 pounds; very unexpected for a guy who’s last fight was at middleweight. At the other end of the spectrum, Tamdan McCrory showed up to the weigh-ins in a full sweat-suit, and had to towel off before stepping on the scale, but still hit his mark on the button. The numbers are below. Swing by tomorrow night as we liveblog the pay-per-view card beginning at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT.

Main Card
BJ Penn (155) vs. Kenny Florian (155)
Anderson Silva (205) vs. Forrest Griffin (205)
Kendall Grove (185.5) vs. Ricardo Almeida (185)
Josh Neer (155.5) vs. Kurt Pellegrino (154.5)
Amir Sadollah (166.5) vs. Johny Hendricks (171)

Preliminary Card
Shane Nelson (156) vs. Aaron Riley (154)
Tamdan McCrory (170) vs. John Howard (169.5)
Alessio Sakara (185.5) vs. Thales Leites (185)
Dan Cramer (169.5) vs. Matt Riddle (170)
George Roop (154) vs. George Sotiropoulos (155)
Danillo Villefort (170.25) vs. Jesse Lennox (171)

Hey, who wants a "vintage" CagePotato Hall of Fame t-shirt? Well too bad, dickface — unless you’re one of the similarly-surnamed commenters who made us LOL with their comments this week:

asswipe jones on "Holy Shit! Alert: Fedor Emelianenko Signs With Strikeforce, Will Debut This Fall": they’re? called M-1 for a reason, they have Motherfucking 1 fighter.

Levi Jones on "This Is What a Fix Looks Like": Mark Coleman, the night of the fight, you may feel a slight sting. That’s PRIDE fucking with you. Fuck PRIDE. PRIDE only hurts, it never helps.

Well done, gents. Please send your real names, addresses, and shirt-sizes to feedback@cagepotato.com in order to claim your tees.

Addendum 1: While searching for the above image, I came across this. Figured I’d share.

Addendum 2: "Ben vs. Ben" returns to SIRIUS Fight Club today at 6 p.m. ET; channel 127 for SIRIUS subscribers, channel 104 for XM peeps. Show your support and tune in!

(Props: Cage Writer)

So youse guys thought that an MMA event in Philly would be just like any MMA event anywhere else in the United States?  Oh, you dumb sons of bitches have no friggin’ idea what you’re in for.  Take it from Greg Sirb, the Executive Director of the Pennsylvania Athletic Commission.  Philly fans ain’t screwin’ around.  

In this video from yesterday’s press conference Sirb wastes no time in explaining to the UFC 101 participants that they are not in Las Vegas and they are not in New Jersey(?!).  Presumably they knew that already, but just in case they were holding out hope that the man responsible for overseeing sporting events in the state of Pennsylvania would try to set a positive example for Philly’s unruly fans, Sirb launches into a speech that is oddly threatening and downright cartoonish.  Are we sure this is the real Executive Director and not some local morning radio DJ?  Please, no one translate that speech for Anderson Silva.  He might not even bother showing up tomorrow night.

After the jump, Tito Ortiz muddles his way through an appearance on local TV alongside Matt Serra, and says Philly and Pittsburgh are the same thing.  At least he didn’t offer to tell the host of the show how she’s feeling right now.

(Get ready for hell, Philly. Stay just about as hellish as usual, Pittsburgh.)

You know what time it is.  With UFC 101 set to invade Philadelphia on Saturday night, we debate the possibilities for an upset, whether the lackluster undercard presents the perfect opportunity to go make ourselves some hoagies, and so much more.

Who has the best chance of scoring an upset this weekend: Kenny Florian, Forrest Griffin, or Brian Bowles?
 
BG: I have to go with Griffin, because at least you can point to his size as one clear advantage he has over Anderson Silva. Plus, he’s a tough S.O.B. who’s not afraid to take a punch — which means he’ll probably do better against the Spider than Patrick Cote and Thales Leites, who seemed to be psyched out before they even stepped into the cage. I like what Forrest has been saying about "touching" Silva, and focusing on just making contact. I’m not saying he’ll be successful, but at least he’ll give Silva a fight, and that’s a good start. You can’t shock the world if you don’t put the ball into play.