(‘I think I know where you’re going wrong. Coloring or blow-drying too often can damage the strands and make your hair look weak and brittle. That’s why I recommend a hot-oil treatment once a week or so to give you that freshly-conditioned look, only without all the hassle. Okay, next question…’)

As we all know, MMA fighters have a limited set of options to help them rebound from a high-profile loss.  One is to change weight classes.  If you’re a fairly young fighter, you always want to go down in weight.  If you’re a little older, you might consider going up a division.  If that won’t work, and if you don’t have it in you to go out of your way in order to pick a fight with some punk that you know you can beat, your only other choice is to change gyms.

That’s what Clay Guida has apparently decided to do in advance of his UFC 107 scrap with Kenny Florian.  Guida is headed to the Greg Jackson camp in New Mexico, where he’ll most likely get top-notch training, a quick primer in nipple tweaks, and his own personal growth plan. 

Clerk Beats Down Armed Robber – Watch more Funny Videos

For those of you who love watching MMA but have often found yourself wondering, ‘Does this have any practical application in my life, or am I just wasting my time with this like I did with that liberal arts degree?’ we’d like to offer the above video as an answer.  Judging by the way this extremely calm store clerk takes down the would-be robber and then administers a little Brock Lesnar-style ground-and-pound, it sure seems like he’s managed to find a way to make MMA relevant in his everyday activities.  As for that liberal arts degree, well, he was working in a convenience store…

After the jump, a fight that will make it easier for you to pretend not to be disappointed when the doctor tells you that you’re having a girl.

(He thought that the throne would give him pleasure; the salesgirl at Pier 1 Imports specifically told him it would. But as he sunk deeper into the red velvet and began to watch the America’s Got Talent semi-finals, a tremendous ennui overtook him. Photo courtesy of Esther Lin/Showtime.)

Here we are, one month after Carano vs. Cyborg, and we still don’t know when Strikeforce is going to put on its next big event. October 10 has been floated as a tentative date for Fedor vs. Rogers, but it hasn’t been made official yet, and it would only give Strikeforce a month to promote the card. (Assuming Strikeforce starts promoting it today, hypothetically.) The hesitation is an unfortunate momentum-killer for Scott Coker & Co., but the reason for the delay is obvious: The longer Strikeforce waits, the more difficult it would be for the UFC to counter-program them with an impromptu live event. When you consider that Anderson Silva may not really be having elbow surgery and could potentially be unleashed at any time to headline a card on Spike TV, this is a very legitimate concern.

So yesterday, Michael Rome at Bloody Elbow had an eyebrow-raising solution: Strikeforce should schedule Fedor vs. Rogers on November 21st, the same night as UFC 106, which will of course feature Brock Lesnar vs. Shane Carwin and Tito Ortiz vs. Mark Coleman. Why wait for the UFC to be the aggressor? After all:

(Props: YouTube.com/norton via BloodyElbow)

This Kimbo Slice character — he’s so hot right now. And security software company Norton has decided to use him in a commercial to represent cybercriminals. Random, yes, but at least Kimbo makes more sense than Norton’s previous celebrity bad guys, the ’80s band Dokken. By the way, if you want to see what would happen if you chose "allow" in the above video, click here. Let’s hope Slice gets more lines of dialogue in the upcoming season of The Ultimate Fighter. Speaking of which…

Next Wednesday Gray Maynard will try to help escort Roger Huerta out of the UFC at Spike TV’s Fight Night 19.  In talking with him for an SI.com feature this week, “The Bully” expressed an unwavering desire to stay out of whatever drama may be going on between Huerta and the UFC, but he also expects to put some of his newly-developed skills on display in hopes of getting MMA fans to finally stand up and take notice of him.

When we saw you in your last fight against Jim Miller, you seemed to have really improved your boxing skills, and that surprised some people.

Yeah, I got with a coach, Gil Martinez, who helped coach [Randy] Couture.  I’ve been with him for about a year and a half now.  When I was getting prepared for [Frankie] Edgar I knew I had to get it going.  I’ve been going with him pretty much every day.  He has a small gym and he has a bunch of kids who can really box.  I’ve been going over there and doing drills and training every day.  He’s a great coach.  I was able to do a little bit against Edgar, where that fight was about half stand-up.  It’s slow to develop.  It takes time.

(Sapp gets embarrassed by Ikuhisa Minowa at the DREAM Super Hulk Tournament’s opening round in May.)

With Gegard Mousasi out of DREAM’s freaky-deaky Super Hulk tournament due to a Fedor-related shoulder injury, DREAM went back to the well to find a replacement. Unsurprisingly, they’re bringing back Bob Sapp to take on Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou in the GP’s second round, which goes down at DREAM.11 (October 6th, Yokohama, broadcast in North America on HDNet). During the Super Hulk quarterfinals at DREAM.9, Sokoudjou snapped a two-fight losing skid by wrecking Jan Nortje, while Bob Sapp got leglocked by Minowaman. The following month, Sapp tapped to strikes against Bobby Lashley at "Ultimate Chaos."

Tangling with Sokoudjou could bring Sapp yet another painful loss, and incredibly, he has a kickboxing match in Hong Kong scheduled for the next day, and may have another MMA fight slated for the next week in Texas. Said Sapp:

(Props: youtube.com/UFC)

"What made Floyd Mayweather a pay-per-view star was Oscar De La Hoya. I know Floyd can’t sell tickets without Oscar but what’s happening here is, boxing is doing it to you again. They’re giving you the fight that you don’t want. Nobody asked for this fight with, ah, with Mayweather and, ah, what’s his name? What’s his name? Nobody even knows, nobody in this room even knows who Floyd’s fighting! I should know, I’m a big boxing guy and I respect the guy that he’s fighting, I know his name but I can’t think of it right now. But that’s my point, nobody gives a shit! Boxing is trying to sell you the fight that nobody cares about. People wanna see Mayweather/Pacquiao. But they’re not giving you that fight…

You show up to see Floyd Mayweather not fight. This guy will run around in circles. Everybody wants to know why the UFC is becoming so popular? It’s because they’re sick of boxers not fighting…basically you get to see ‘Dancing With the Stars’ again with Floyd Mayweather, except you have to pay for it this time…On that same night, on that UFC card, you guys can all tune in and you can watch not one fight, you guys can watch five great fights that night, for ten dollars less than what Floyd wants you to pay to see him run around in circles and lay on the ropes and move around and not fight."

Dana White may have muzzled his video blogs, but he won’t hesitate to lay down some verbal bitchsmack recorded against a green-screen when the situation calls for it. And Floyd Mayweather’s anti-MMA rhetoric has clearly gotten under his skin. Dana may have a point about Mayweather not setting up the matchup that fans want to see, but he should be careful about banging that drum too hard. After all, which fight did MMA fans ask for: Lesnar vs. Carwin or Lesnar vs. Fedor? When did we start clamoring for Franklin vs. Belfort? And by the way, Dana, Floyd’s opponent is Juan Manuel Marquez, and he’s fabulous.

(Someone’s got big bracelets to fill.)

Fighting and acting have at least one thing in common: most people see trained professionals in action so often that it makes them think the job is a lot easier than it really is.  That could be part of what’s luring fighters like “Rampage” Jackson and Gina Carano out of the cage and onto the movie set.  Money is also a big part of it, as is the opportunity to get paid without getting beaten up.  The downside, at least for the fans, is that we have about as much interest in seeing our favorite fighters act as we do in seeing our favorite actors fight. 

No, I take that back.  I’d much rather see Val Kilmer get in the cage than watch Randy Couture glare his way through another “Scorpion King” movie, but I digress.

When it comes to making self-aggrandizing statements that vastly overstate his own importance and ability, no one in MMA even comes close to Tito Ortiz.  In this video interview (props to The Garv for the find) Ortiz manages to call Lyoto Machida a pussy, take credit for the champ’s current fight-finishing streak, and praise both Brock Lesnar and Georges St. Pierre for being Tito Ortiz-esque fighters, all in just four minutes.  That’s called covering all your bases, and doing so with efficiency.  We’d expect nothing less from the guy who hasn’t had a significant win in over three years, and yet has somehow remained relevant.

Get your tickets, Philly fight fans: The world’s most famous police brutality victim is set to square off against a half-crazy ex-cop. According to Zimbio, reality TV star Rodney King will be involved in a Celebrity Boxing Federation match this Friday night at the Philadelphia Airport Ramada Inn. (Swanky!) His opponent is former police officer Simon "The Renegade" Aouad, whose biggest claim to fame is his celebrity boxing match against Rodney King this Friday. Okay, so the term "celebrity" is being used veeeeeerrrrrrryyyyy loosely here, but the hook behind this matchup doesn’t need to be spelled out. You can get a look at the maniac cop‘s training methods above. The two amateur pugilists appeared on the Howard Stern Show yesterday morning to plug the event. Some highlights:

("I’m gettin’ that belt back, sucka.")

It looks like Rashad Evans has another reason to hate Quinton Jackson’s guts. As Sugar revealed on yesterday’s edition of the “It’s Time” radio show with Bruce Buffer, Evans and Jackson will not be fighting at UFC 107 as originally planned, due to the demands of Rampage’s role in the upcoming A-Team movie. Said Evans:

(‘I do declare, Mr. Beauregard!’ Photo courtesy of Waters Golf.)

A few weeks ago we were a little surprised to learn that UFC Octagon girl Natasha Wicks has a side job as a caddy at a Las Vegas golf course.  Not that it would be the worst job one of the UFC’s professional hot chicks ever held, it just seemed a little strange.  Well, those clever wags at Fightlinker located the website where you can go to rent Natasha’s services on the links (for $400), and wouldn’t you know it, there are plenty of photos of her that perfectly straddle the line between sexy and ridiculous, which is just how we like our women.  For example, the above image proves that she can pretend to like you as she laughs at your stupid jokes and uses hand gestures to keep you from noticing the lack of sincerity in her eyes.  In the business, that little move is known as ‘The Scarlett O’Hara.’

After the jump, she demonstrates why you probably shouldn’t hire her if you take your golf really seriously.  Or if you’re bringing your wife along.  Of course, if Natasha isn’t your type you can also get former Penthouse Pet Erica Ellyson (totally NSFW).

(This guy’s first mistake? Getting that close to Wes Sims. His second mistake? Not running away when he realized that Wes could squash his head like a grape.)

If you ever get the chance to sit down and talk with Wes Sims, don’t pass it up.  The guy has as unique a personality as anyone you’re ever likely to meet, and he has some good stories to tell, too.  In this exclusive interview, Sims talks with us about going from homeless ex-UFC fighter to reality TV contestant, what it was like living with the very hungry Roy Nelson, and how he used a text message to land his spot on season ten of “The Ultimate Fighter.”  Trust me, you don’t want to miss this one.

CagePotato.com: Thanks for talking with me, Wes.  So tell me, how did you like living in the “Ultimate Fighter” house?

Oh, it was great.  I didn’t want to leave that house.

Really?

Yeah.  If you would have seen where I was before, I literally had to pack up all my belongings to move in to the house.  It’s been okay since then, but when I was out there I didn’t want to leave the house. 

I think you’re the only person from that show to ever say that.

Vampires: Old and Busted.
Werewolves: New Hotness?

According to ScreenJunkies, music video director Sxv’leithan Essex [sic] is teaming up with the producer of Rise of the Silver Surfer to bring us Growl, a story about an underground MMA fight club hunted by a family of werewolves. It’s like Fighting meets The Lost Boys meets My God This Movie Is Going to Be Terrible. Here’s the synopsis, via ShockTillYouDrop:

Well sure, Mr. Lost Boy himself being a part of the production is cool and all, but does anyone else notice that the shadowy figure in the poster image on the right bears a striking resemblance to the New York Badass? We’ll let you know if Baroni can take a break from training for Amir Sadollah and beating up nerds long enough to confirm our suspicions.

("Bones" and "Osteoporosis" warm up before UFC 100. Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

According to reports on MMA Madness and The Garv, UFC light-heavyweights Jon Jones and Matt Hamill have agreed to face each other on the main card of the TUF 10 Finale (December 5th, Las Vegas). One of MMA’s most exciting prospects, Jones (9-0) most recently submitted Jake O’Brien at UFC 100, following decision wins over Andre Gusmao and Stephan Bonnar. Hamill (6-2) could be Bones’s toughest test yet. The TUF 3 vet has won back-to-back fights since his loss to Rich Franklin at UFC 88, scoring a TKO over Reese Andy at UFC 92 and a devastating head kick KO of Mark Munoz at UFC 96. It will be the first of a new four-fight deal for Jon Jones, who’s now splitting his time between Tristar Gym and Greg Jackson’s camp.

The Orange County Register has an update on the case against Jeffrey David Kirby, the man accused of killing Tapout’s Charles “Mask” Lewis in a drunk-driving accident this past spring.  Late last week the judge refused to give Kirby a reduced sentence in exchange for pleading guilty to vehicular manslaughter.  Instead, prosecutors are seeking an 18-year sentence for Kirby, who has two prior convictions for drunk driving and had a .13 blood/alcohol level hours after the crash that killed Mask.  Kirby’s attorney expressed his remorse for the Tapout co-founder’s death, but also tried to put at least a little of the blame on him:

Defense attorney David E. Swanson said during a one-hour hearing in the Harbor Justice Center that Kirby "feels horrible about what happened. He is extremely remorseful … he’s devastated. He will never get over this."

(Maybe Guy Mezger was on to something about not wanting to get thrown on that shitty mat.)

Good news for those of you who were hoping to see a true freak triumph in Dream’s “Super Hulk” tournament.  Gegard Mousasi has pulled out, thereby increasing every other participant’s chances to win the whole thing.  Mousasi withdrew from the strange tournament this week, forcing Dream to try and find a replacement to fill in for him against Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou in the semi-finals, which are scheduled to take place on October 6.  But the real question is, why is Mousasi pulling out less than a month from the fight?

(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

After giving tender consideration to nearly 200 of your entries, we’ve selected the two winners of Friday’s caption contest, who will both be receiving DVD copies of How Bruce Lee Changed the Word, courtesy of A&E Home Entertainment. But first some honorable mentions:

Fedor vs. Bas: And this was the last time Rua touched Lyoto.

Rockologist: "Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like piss. If you piss into a cup, it becomes the cup. You piss into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. Piss into my mouth, it becomes my breakfast."

Ceeph: Lyoto Machida seen here, thanking Shogun for his impending KO of the Night bonus.

NealTaflinger: The always-evasive Machida slips Rua’s eye contact and counters with a handshake.

El Famous Burrito: "Your lifeline seems to terminate right around midnight, October the 24th. Also, your beloved bicycle is at The Alamo, in the basement."

hotsaucemonster: "Thank God I’m fighting someone Brazilian, what say after I’m done removing your nuts through your mouth we eat steak, wear speedos and pronounce our Rs with H sounds?"

Akilleez: "It looks benign to me, but just to be safe I am going to freeze it off."

Horror Fighter: "Look down there! It’s the midget from the last caption contest!"

And now the winners…

(Props: CagePotato reader "David D.")

There are some things in this mad, mad world that we’ll never fully understand. Like, for example, why the movie Legally Blonde had to be adpated into a musical. Or why UFC play-by-play man Mike Goldberg took a singing role in a low-rent production of that musical. Skip to the 1:59 mark of the above video for Goldie’s star turn as the lead character’s argyle-socked father. Seriously, WTF? Did Mike lose a fight-picking bet to Joe Rogan? Does he direct community theatre on the weekends, and did the actor who was actually supposed to play the role call in sick that night? Did Guffman ever show up? We need answers, and the Internet is giving us nothing.

(This game of strip poker would have been a lot more fun if Swick had any desire at all to see you guys naked.)

Though Mike Swick’s injury proved to be a major bummer for a UFC 103 card that could have really used a number-one contender fight to improve its overall appeal, the withdrawal just might end up getting Swick the fight he wanted to begin with.  Before the UFC matched him up against Martin Kampmann, Swick asked for Matt Hughes.  When he didn’t get it, he gladly took the fight with Kampmann, which the UFC later said would determine who got the next shot at Georges St. Pierre.  Now Swick says he could be ready to go again as soon as UFC 104, and, if you don’t mind, he’d like to make a suggestion about a possible opponent: 

 No next opponent has been offered, but yes I would love to fight Hughes. I will be ready by UFC 104 so just waiting for the UFC to call. … I have no set return yet. I just said I will be ready by UFC 104. So 104, 105, 106, 107… I will fight as soon as I get an opportunity!

The UFC didn’t listen to his pleas the first time, but this might actually work.  Hughes just re-upped for a few more fights, and UFC 104 might become more of a must-see if Swick-Hughes bumps Gleison Tibau-Josh Neer to the dark portion of the card. 

Okay, so MTV’s "Bully Beatdown" may not be quite as organic as the first season tried to get us to believe, but does it really matter?  Season two seems to have largely done away with the possibly-scripted bully confrontation scene, and replaced it with the one-on-one interview with "Mayhem" Miller, where this particular bully credits his grandmother for having the toughness to endure the Great Depression of the early nineties.  At least we don’t have to worry about him losing any valuable brain cells when former Brett Rogers-victim Jon Murphy goes to wailing on him.

After the jump, Vitor Belfort does a little bullying of his own in the gym, plus a bizarre entrance that Chuck Liddell would probably rather forget.

(Diego Sanchez vs. Clay Guida)

The moment of impact is never flattering. Here are 21 examples of the special look a just-punched fighter gets that says "I may have suffered a minor stroke, please help." (Not to be confused with bitter beer face.) Lots more after the jump…

(Victor Valimaki vs. Alessio Sakara)

(Georges St. Pierre vs. Thaigo Alves)

(Props: Spike.com.)

With The Ultimate Fighter: Heavyweights kicking off eight days from now, Spike has released this eight-minute taste of the season premiere. As soon as Quinton Jackson and Rashad Evans show up on screen, the jibber-jabbering begins. Evans says that Rampage is too slow, and his big head is too easy a target. Rampage says that Rashad’s last fight proved he has no chin, and he ain’t fought nobody. Then, 15 of the castmembers walk in, and holy crap is Marcus Jones a large man. Dana White comes in to introduce a steely-eyed Kimbo Slice, who seems quite aware of the target on his back. Though Brendan Schaub doesn’t approve of Slice’s presence ("when he walked in, it was kinda like the sheep entering the room with a bunch of wolves"), Rampage claims first-pick dibs on him — and that’s just fine with Rashad. Watch how the team picks play out next Wednesday (9/16) at 10 p.m, directly following UFC Fight Night 19.

(Lyoto Machida walked into the gym that day just to learn a little jiu-jitsu, but he walked out as a witness to murder.)

With Labor Day weekend upon us we are forced to admit that MMA’s Summer of Weird – the summer that saw us reach new highs with UFC 100 and bizarre new lows with the Affliction: Trilogy cancellation – is over.  Waiting for us in the future is a fall fighting season full of fistic goodness.  But since there’s no significant action until mid-September, we decided to take a look at some of the current betting lines on MMA’s coming attractions.

Naturally, we turn to our friends at BestFightOdds.com for the most profitable lines on some select match-ups:

UFC Fight Night 19: September 16

Melvin Guillard (+215) vs. Nate Diaz (-220)
Gray Maynard (-264) vs. Roger Huerta (+264)

UFC 103: September 19

Rich Franklin (-150) vs. Vitor Belfort (+135)
Frank Trigg (+310) vs. Josh Koscheck (-355)
Junior Dos Santos (-127) vs. Mirko Filipovic (+115)

(Ready for her close-up. Image courtesy of gina-carano.org.)

According to Variety, Oscar-winning director Steven Soderbergh (Oceans 11/12/13, Traffic, Erin Brockovich, Out of Sight) has cast MMA starlet Gina Carano in the lead role of his next film. Here’s what we’re dealing with:

Knockout, which begins production in late January 2010, follows a very busy 2009 for Soderbergh, who released two movies this year: The Girlfriend Experience (which employed a similar bit of stunt-casting with porn-star Sasha Grey in the lead role as a high-end escort) and The Informant!, which comes out later this month.

Though Carano has previously appeared as "Crush" on American Gladiators and made a cameo in the low-budget action flick Blood and Bone, this will be her first role in a high-profile film production. Carano hasn’t yet revealed if she’ll be taking another fight in Strikeforce before the year’s end, so be warned — a long, Cung Le-esque layoff could be in Gina’s future.

As many of you know, gone-before-his-time super-heavyweight Ross Clifton was a friend and training partner to batshit Stevia spokesperson Dan Quinn. We decided to cruise over to Quinn’s YouTube channel to see if he had released a statement about Clifton, and sure enough, there’s this 11-minute missive that he recorded last night. Quinn describes Clifton as an angel who was already penciled in as the Little John to his Robin Hood. Then, he shows us a strange Craigslist w4m ad that he came across, and the even stranger 5,000-word manifesto that he wrote in response. (The best part comes at 5:58: "I’m thinking this is definitely worth the price of admission to a cool coffee place of your choosing. Multiple exits, tons of people, as safe a coffee date as there ever was one." Note to Craigslist surfers: Trying to reassure your prospective hookups that they will definitely not get fritzl’d usually has the opposite effect.) Later, Quinn’s tough-guy facade begins to crack, and he tries to bury the hatchet with arch-nemesis Cal Worsham, and vows to avenge the wife and children of Clifton, should they ever come to harm. Sorry for your loss, Maitreya.

(If Dan had only faked an injury, it would have been a totally different story.)

After Nate Marquardt‘s brutal knockout of Demian Maia at UFC 102, Anderson Silva was faced with the possibility of having to rematch both Marquardt and Dan Henderson in title defenses — not exactly the fresh challenges that Silva wanted to focus on during the remaining fights of his career. Silva’s manager Ed Soares suggested that Marquardt and Henderson fight each other to establish a true #1 middleweight contender, and Dan Henderson suggested that Ed Soares get stuffed. Well, the Spider has found a solution to the middleweight contender problem, as he’s decided to undergo elbow surgery and will sit out the rest of the year.

So, unless Henderson wants to accumulate some nice ring-rust — and wait until the spring to get paid again — he’ll probably have to take the fight against Marquardt. (See? Just because Ed and Anderson speak that bizarre foreign language, it doesn’t mean they’re not clever.) If you’re Dana White, your first reaction to this elbow-surgery news is probably "Silva, you cocksucker." Your second reaction is to realize that UFC 105 still lacks a main event, and Henderson vs. Marquardt is probably as good a matchup as you’re going to get at this point.

(R.I.P., big fella)

Ross Clifton, the MMA fighter perhaps best known for his bout with Ken Shamrock at a February Wargods event, is reportedly dead of a heart attack at 32, according to MMA Weekly.  He was found by his wife on Friday morning.  His trainer, Cal Worsham, confirmed the news and described Clifton as "a jovial teddy bear in the body of a grizzly."  Clifton began his pro career in 2001 and most recently lost via first-round TKO against Rick Vardell in July.  Thoughts, prayers, whatever you do…

(In the NFL, being caught for steroids means never having to say you’re sorry.)

While we’ve been caught up talking up the former NFL players on the upcoming season of “The Ultimate Fighter,” we totally neglected the current NFL players who are into MMA.  Sometimes they do it for conditioning, or to get tougher, or, as this New York Daily News report suggests, because they want to stay in shape while serving a suspension for performance-enhancing drugs. 

Jets outside linebacker Calvin Pace is headed to Xtreme Couture in Las Vegas with fellow suspended substance abusers Will Smith (not that one) and Charles Grant, both of the New Orleans Saints, to work out while they wait for their suspensions to be over and their systems to get clean.  Basically, steroid use in the NFL is now so prevalent that not only is there no real public or media backlash against the players who get caught, they can plan on having plenty of traveling companions during their suspensions.  When asked why he chose MMA to fill his league-mandated off time, Pace had this to say:

 
(Via Fightlinker: Is this worse than the Oregon/Boise State sucker punch? On one hand, at least this happened in a fight. On the other, it was the part of the fight where they were supposed to be demonstrating good sportsmanship.)

- Strikeforce thinks Overeem will come back…eventually. (MMA Mania)

- "Absorption problems" for the UFC and WEC? (MMA Payout)

- TUF 10′s James McSweeney has a ridiculous record as a kickboxer. (Fight Magazine)

- Could the "A-Team" remake cost us Rampage vs. Rashad? (WKR)

- "King Mo" Lawal is serious talks with Strikeforce. (MMA Fanhouse)

- Shane Carwin’s busy training schedule. (Shane-Carwin.com)

- The horror movie role Tim Sylvia was born to play. (Cage Writer)

- Jon Jones signs new four-fight deal with the UFC. (MMA Madness)

- Justin Eilers’ killer convicted of manslaughter. (Idaho Statesman)

- Did Michael Bisping have some sense punched into him? (The Rumble)

- Inappropriate uses of the laugh track. (Screen Junkies)

- Freaky pictures of celebrity couples with their heads switched. (Holy Taco)

– Babes that come in pairs. (Babes n Brawls)

– Tim Larkin wants you to know how to kill. (Asylum)

- Wreck of the Week: break out the stripper pole. (All Left Turns)

- Things to never, ever say to your girlfriend. (Made Man)

- Cop punches really, really fat guy. (Nothing Toxic)