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Here's What Happens When Strangers Draw Your Selfies

September, 2009

Strikeforce Will See Your NFL Washouts, UFC, and Raise You a Heisman Trophy Winner


(Yep, this should give you an idea of how old Herschel Walker is.  When he started in the NFL, Sports Illustrated cost $2.25 an issue and the publishing industry only had a handful of fonts to choose from.)

Maybe it’s just me, but whenever I hear a company or organization proclaim that something they’re doing is totally not a gimmick, that’s about the point where I become convinced that it is absolutely a gimmick.  And yet, Strikeforce wants us to believe that their signing of 47-year-old former NFL star Herschel Walker – a man with no professional MMA experience – “isn’t a publicity stunt.”  Just like it probably has nothing to do with all the attention the UFC has garnered by putting a bunch of former NFL players on this season of “The Ultimate Fighter.”  Just a coincidence.

But in a press release sent out by Strikeforce this morning, Walker, who is expected to compete at heavyweight, says he’s headed to AKA to train with their team of monsters, and he seems to think that he has valuable fighting experience to draw upon, even if it isn’t in MMA:

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The Potato Index: UFC 103 Aftermath

Vitor Belfort vs. Rich Franklin UFC 103
(Photo courtesy of UFC.com)

Between Fight Night 19 and UFC 103, complete with the glitchy undercard broadcasted poorly on Spike TV, if you didn’t get enough MMA last week then odds are you have a problem.  Sorry, but it’s true.  And no matter how much you might want them to, takedowns and superman punches will never fill that void inside of you.  For the rest of you, join us to look at who’s up and who’s down after UFC 103 via the completely arbitrary and not all that helpful numerical ranking system of the Potato Index.  It’s what we do.

Vitor Belfort +178
A more patient “Phenom” proves he still has it, and against the best fighter he’s faced in years.  The UFC’s middleweight division needs new blood, but can he really threaten Anderson Silva?

Rich Franklin -112
Lucky for him Belfort is dropping to middleweight, so he’s still the king of the 195 lbs. division.  Was it really necessary for Joe Rogan to make him watch the replay and attempt to make sense of it?  Kind of like asking someone who just came out of surgery to shake off the anesthesia and tell us about that kidney removal.  They aren’t likely to have much insight to offer just then.

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Heads-Up: Chuck Liddell Debuts on ‘Dancing With the Stars’ Tonight

Chuck Liddell DWTS Dancing With the Stars
("My name’s Chuck. You can call me Mr. Seduction." Image courtesy of BloodyElbow.)

Repent, for judgment day is upon us. Tonight at 8 p.m. ET/PT, the ninth season of Dancing With the Stars will premiere on ABC, featuring the Iceman himself, Chuck Liddell. Tune in to find out how Chuck responds to criticism from this doofus. For those of you who think Liddell is going to get blown out of the competition early, prepare to be shocked. According to TMZ, he’s given up alcohol for the gig, and is actually a dark horse to go all the way: "Our spies say he’s really good and practices like a mutha. One source says he gets to practice early and shuts the place down, with 6 hour, uninterrupted power sessions. And get this — we’re told he’s already lost 20 lbs."

Which of course means that he won his $10,000 bet with Dana White

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‘Worn Out’ Cro Cop Ponders Retirement After Rough Outing at UFC 103

Mirko Cro Cop Filipovic UFC 103 MMA
(Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

After Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovic‘s ugly loss to Junior Dos Santos at UFC 103 on Saturday, it was clear that his will to win has eroded even more than his skills as a fighter. For two-and-a-half rounds, we saw a backpedaling, hesitant, shadow of Cro Cop’s former self get outstruck by someone he would have murdered three years ago. It was obviously the end of the line for Filipovic as a relevant competitor — and nobody sees that as clearly as Mirko himself. As he told jutarnji.hr (translated by Robert K. at bigoddsmike.com):

I fucked up and that’s all there is to it. Maybe the ones who I’ve said that I’m done are right. Obviously I can’t break my mental block in the Octagon. Besides, I’ve been training like a spartan for 20 years now, my body is worn out. The years caught up to me, I’ve been worn out…I want a normal life. I’m entering a cage and thinking about fishing in Privlaka. You can’t win that way.
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Video: Floyd Mayweather vs. Juan Manuel Marquez


(Apologies for the pop-up. Video courtesy of MMALinker.)

Floyd Mayweather defeated Juan Manuel Marquez last night in a one-sided unanimous decision that saw Money control every round and score a knockdown in the second frame. Mayweather landed 290 of 493 (59%) of his punches, compared to Marquez’s 69 of 583 (12%). At UFC 103 in Dallas, Dana White had the boxing match playing on a monitor near him. His verdict? "It sucked. It sucked just like I said it would and knew it would."

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UFC 103 Aftermath: Bonuses, Belfort’s Next Move, the Fate of Cro Cop + More

Mirko Cro Cop Filipovic UFC 103 Junior Dos Santos
("I’m sorry to tell you this, Mirko, but we discovered a scratch on your cornea. Also, there seems to be a large quantity of sand in your vagina." Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

— The UFC handed out its traditional end-of-night bonuses following UFC 103, which totaled $65,000 this time around. Fight of the Night went to Rick Story and Brian Foster, whose two-round bang-up ended with Story sinking in an arm-triangle choke. For this, Story also got the Submission of the Night Award; not a bad payday for an up-and-coming fighter. KO of the night went to Vitor Belfort for his old-Vitor-esque first-round smashing of Rich Franklin. The event drew a sellout crowd of 17.428 fans to the American Airlines Center in Dallas, producing a live gate of $2.4 million.

— During the post-event press-conference, Dana White made his intentions known about Belfort’s place in the UFC middleweight division: "To be honest with you, the way the last two fights happened with Marquardt and Henderson against Anderson Silva, I think it would be better to see them fight each other, and the winner of that become the next contender. I think Vitor is ready to fight Anderson Silva (now)…I love the fact that we have Vitor at that weight class." Belfort credited his win to a new focus on karate: "It’s just something that I want to use right now. I was taking my time. I was feeling the fight. As soon as I see something, I make sure I have the zip code, the address and the social security number…Sometimes I take my time; sometimes I’m aggressive. But as soon as I start, I make sure I fight. That’s what people want to see."

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UFC 103: The Liveblog

Rich Franklin vs. Vitor Belfort UFC 103
(‘Hey guys, I like you both, but I’m going for ice cream later and there’s only one open seat in my convertible.  I’ll let you two sort this out however you deem necessary.’ Photo courtesy of UFC.com.)

Looking for live results, sort of clever commentary, and pithy observations all rolled into one for tonight’s UFC 103?  Then you’re in the right place.  We’ll follow the action from Spike TV to pay-per-view as we wait for the most important 195-pound bout since Rich Franklin vs. Wanderlei Silva to be decided.  And on this night when MMA and boxing are supposedly going head-to-head, we promise that we won’t even mention Floyd Mayweather.  Oh crap, we blew it already, didn’t we?  Screw it.  Remember to hit refresh often to keep up with the action.

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Video: Tim Sylvia KO’s Jason Riley at Adrenaline MMA 4

Tim Sylvia may have resurrected his career, however briefly, with last night’s first-round TKO win over Jason Riley, who seems to be a textbook Chuck Liddell fan.  As you can see in this video, Riley doesn’t look like he’s the most technically sound striker Sylvia has ever faced, and after getting clipped behind the ear early on he spends most of the rest of the fight trying to hang out in the clinch.  It’s not too long before Sylvia catches him with an uppercut/left hook combo and then, as Michael Schiavello puts it, it’s "goodnight, Irene."  Charming, that guy.

Obviously, a win over 6-1 Jason Riley probably isn’t going to launch Sylvia into a UFC heavyweight title fight, but that’s not really the stakes he’s playing for at the moment.  He just needed to not suffer another embarrassing loss, and he accomplished that.  Way to go.  See what’s possible when you set the bar really, really low? 

Elsewhere on the card, Houston Alexander managed to end his losing streak with a first-round TKO of Sherman Pendergarst (video of that fight is here, if you’re interested) thanks mostly to a series of leg kicks that seemed to utterly baffle Pendergarst.  The win apparently pumped Alexander up something fierce because he then declared himself "one of the best fighters in the light heavyweight division."  Hope the athletic commission tests for hallucinogens.

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Friday Link Dump


(Bas Rutten lays a serious smackdown on Bob Arum; GSP comes out as a skinhead homosexual. Props: MMA Scraps.)

- Belfort, Franca, and Escudero have trouble at UFC 103 weigh-ins. (MMA Fanhouse)

– Shawn Tompkins on Belfort, Griffin, UFC 103. (Fight Magazine)

- Dream.11 taking shape. (MMA Mania)

- Did the UFC have to fight on Rosh Hashanah? (Cage Writer)

- Mark Dellagrotte discusses split with Kenny Florian. (Fighters Only)

- Hottest wives and girlfriends of MMA. (MMA Fight Girls)

- Roy Nelson talks TUF 10. (USA Today)

- Tim Sylvia fights, possibly has career ended tonight. (WKR)

- Bantam and featherweights trying to break through glass ceiling. (MMA Payout)

- What to expect from UFC 103. (Bleacher Report)

- NFL picks and predictions, week two. (Scores Report)

- Ten Commandments of the first date. (TSB Magazine)

- Wrestling royalty runs for senator in Connecticut. (Asylum)

- Floyd Mayweather talks MMA and Marquez. (Ask Men)

- 25 x 3 = 75 hot girls. (Holy Taco)

- 7 awful prequel ideas and their posters. (Screen Junkies)

- 5 harbingers of wedding day doom. (Made Man)

- Drunk NASCAR commentators. (All Left Turns)

- Father and son team up in brawl. (Nothing Toxic)

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Gambling Addiction Enabler: UFC 103


(If his kick can get through this guy’s impregnable defenses, is anyone safe?)

After I got cleaned out at UFC Fight Night 19, it’s time to make some money back the only way I know how: selling fake Coach purses on the street.  Then I’m going to go blow all that money on UFC 103 bets.  Pretty solid little weekend I got planned, really.  Betting lines come to us courtesy of BestFightOdds.com:

Rich Franklin (-125) vs. Vitor Belfort (+117)
Mirko Filipovic (+120) vs. Junior Dos Santos (-130)
Martin Kampmann (-350) vs. Paul Daley (+325)
Josh Koscheck (-360) vs. Frank Trigg (+355)
Tyson Griffin (-280) vs. Hermes Franca (+285)
Efrain Escudero (-150) vs. Cole Miller (+140)
Drew McFedries (even) vs. Tomasz Drwal (even)
Jim Miller (-435) vs. Steve Lopez (+400)
Rafaello Oliveira (-275) vs. Nik Lentz (+260)
Rick Story (-125) vs. Brian Foster (+110)
Eliot Marshall (+125) vs. Jason Brilz (-135)
Vladimir Matyushenko (-270) vs. Igor Pokrajac (+255)
Rob Emerson (+113) vs. Rafael Dos Anjos (-110)

The breakdown… 

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