(Any man who can come out looking like Frankenstein and laugh it off is okay by us.)

Despite our pleas to see Dutch beanstalk Stefan Struve take on the UFC’s shortest heavyweight in Pat Barry, Struve is now official as the replacement for the injured Todd Duffee against Paul Buentello at UFC 107 in December.  While it’s not the David vs. Goliath fight we were hoping for (Buentello is 6’2", which isn’t funny at all), there’s still the young punk (21-year-old Struve) vs. grizzled old veteran (Buentello’s 35) angle. 

Buentello is returning to the UFC after wins in both of Affliction’s events, first against Gary Goodridge and then against Kiril "Little Fedor on Steroids" Sidelnikov.  The last time Buentello fought in the Octagon was February of 2006, when he beat Gilbert Adana via TKO at UFC 57.  The very next night, on another continent, Struve competed in his fourth pro MMA bout at the "Staredown City" event in Oostzaan, Holland.  He defeated Murat Bourekba via disqualification.  When Buentello made his MMA debut in April of 1997, Struve had just recently celebrated his ninth birthday.  Should be an interesting scrap.       

(Props: UFC.com via MMA Fight Girls)

Candid, self-shot tweetphotos are nice and all, but sometimes you just need the touch of a professional photographer. The UFC recently released a new batch of high-quality Octagon Girl photos for your viewing pleasure, and they’re just the thing to get you through another miserable hump-day. Lots more pics after the jump; you can see the rest right here.

("I’m gettin’ too calm and emotionless for this shit." Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

— Though it was initially rumored that Fedor Emelianenko could be out-of-action for 4-6 months due to a jacked-up left thumb he suffered in the first round of his fight against Brett Rogers, his condition has been upgraded. Sherdog reports that the Last Emperor underwent surgery yesterday to fix his injury, and will have a half-cast removed in just 4-6 weeks:

— Cristiane "Cris Cyborg" Santos is expected to make her first Strikeforce title defense against Marloes Coenen on January 30th in Miami, according to MMA Weekly. Santos was originally slated to compete on last Saturday’s "Fedor vs. Rogers" card, but her return was pushed back after she suffered an injury during the 2009 ADCC‘s in September.

…but I can’t quite put my finger on what it is.  Is that it doesn’t look enough like Clay Guida, resembling instead a really mean version of Cher?  Or is it that it looks too much like Guida, and for some reason I never noticed how creepy he is until now?  Regardless, the Round 5 UFC Series 1 figures are hitting Toys R Us before Christmas, so if there’s a child in your life whose sleep you would like to disturb for a very long time, go ahead and give him one of these as a gift.  Nothing says Merry Christmas like a doll that looks really hairy, and yet is still not quite hairy enough to be an accurate representation.  

(Cro Cop helps the K-1 promoters play a very cruel joke on Bob Sapp.)

Just a couple months ago Mirko “Cro Cop” Filipovic appeared to be walking away from MMA for good, citing a lack of desire after a thoroughly uninspired effort against Junior Dos Santos at UFC 103.  Now it seems as though he’s coming back to take on Ben Rothwell in Australia this January, so you might rightfully be wondering, what’s going to change, apart from Filipovic’s facial structure if he doesn’t improve upon his last performance? 

Well, almost before you can finish asking the question, Cro Cop has answered it.  He’s dropped his old boxing coach in favor of working with former Muay Thai champ Ivan “The Hydro” Hippolyte, and he’s also sent his old buddy and sparring partner Igor Pokrajac packing.  So, problem solved?

(Look familiar? Photo courtesy of this set on Combat Lifestyle.)

Though the entire broadcast of "Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Rogers" averaged 4.04 million viewers — placing it behind Kimbo-headlined CBS cards like "EliteXC: Primetime" (4.85 million viewers) and "EliteXC: Heat" (4.56 million viewers) — the ratings for Saturday night’s card shot up during the main event. MMA Weekly reports that 5.46 million home viewers were in attendance between 11:00 p.m. and 11:15 p.m., making the Emelianenko vs. Rogers match the ninth-most-watched fight in U.S. MMA history. You can check out this slightly outdated list to see where that puts them, but basically, the fight fell just 15,000 viewers short of Michael Bisping vs. Matt Hamill, and about 1.8 million viewers short of the reigning champion, Kimbo vs. James Thompson. Senior Executive Vice President of CBS Primetime Kelly Kahl was pleased with the numbers:

Not coincidentally, the 11:00-11:15 p.m. block coincides with the time when the UFC’s "Main Events" broadcast on Spike had just ended — so a large part of the bump could be attributed to MMA fans switching from one channel to another. (No word yet on how Spike did that night.) The question is: Can Fedor draw even better ratings in his next CBS appearance, now that he’s more of a known quantity? Will he ever approach — dare we say it — Kimbo-esque levels of stardom?

(Props: DementedRants via adrenochrome)

Dan Quinn, you have competition. The new up-and-comer in the YouTube Crackpot division is a 51-year-old dude calling himself Damian Demento, who releases talk-radio-style blowhard rants on MMA, pro-wrestling, and marijuana. He’s a very angry person, and his latest hostility-target is Fedor Emelianenko. Despite the fact that Demento didn’t watch the fight on Saturday, he wasn’t too impressed by Fedor’s performance, or the predictable head-hunting style of Brett Rogers. For the benefit of all us stupid MMA fans, he explains how he’d be able to defeat the fighter that he knows as "Feedor Emelenkio." Basically, generations of Soviet inbreeding have produced Fedor’s trademark dwarfed head and thick skull, and what you really need to do is put the boots to his belly. And Fedor would fall for it, because he’s no smarter than Brock Leznahr or Chuck Little. If you enjoyed this rant, please check out "HOW I CAN BEAT BROCK LESNAR and "PROOF UFC IS FAKE." I tell you, after a few hits of PCP, this guy begins to make a lot of sense.

Speaking of shit that makes me laugh…

(Mike Swick’s DIY video blog, which is for some reason posted by Swick himself and not featured on the UFC’s YouTube page along with Dan Hardy’s and Dana White’s.)

Dan Hardy hasn’t waged the same psychological warfare campaign against Mike Swick in advance of their UFC 105 bout this weekend as he did against Marcus Davis, opting instead to politely agree to beat one another’s asses like gentlemen.  That might be because he respects Swick a little more, or just because he realizes that being branded as the guy who makes every fight personal is a great way to make everyone hate you eventually.  But even though Hardy has toned it down for this one, Swick is still finding plenty to get fired up about.  Case in point, his insistence that Hardy does not respect his speed, which seems to be the easiest way to piss Swick off:

“I’ve seen it happen time and time again. Time and time again, my opponents come in and fight me, and they never give me respect, they always say that my speed is not an issue, they always say that they’re stronger than me, they always say that they’re going to hit harder than me, and they always say they’re going to knock me out. And time and time again, I’m the one sitting in the postfight press conference after a victory.”

(Photo courtesy of FightMagazine.com, where total Midwest mark Neal Taflinger makes the case for more MMA shows in the Midwest. Weird.)

Sometimes – not often, but every once in a while – I really wish Dana White would change up his script just a little bit.  Nothing drastic.  He doesn’t have to call Shinya Aoki the world’s best lightweight or insist that there’s plenty of room for all promotions under the big tent of MMA.  But maybe just once he could offer a reaction to a competitor’s event that isn’t painfully predictable.  For instance, he could say that he enjoyed it, or even that he just totally forgot it was on.  You know, get passive-aggressive instead of aggressive-aggressive for a change. 

It may happen one day, but today is not that day.  When asked by the L.A. Times what he thought of Strikeforce, their ratings, and Fedor Emelianenko, it was like somebody had just pulled DW’s string:

“CBS would be out of their mind to put that rinky-dink [Strikeforce] . . . on the air again . . . and without that backing, [promoters] won’t have the money to pay [Emelianenko]. …The guy just got his face smashed in by Brett Rogers. Do you know what Brock or Frank Mir and Cain Velasquez would do to Brett Rogers?  It’s time to bring this guy [Fedor] in, to see Brock Lesnar smash his head.”

(Hamman vs. Po’ai Suganuma 2, 8/15/08)

The UFC’s trip to Manchester this Saturday will feature just two new faces — and they’ll be fighting each other. So who’s got the better chance of making a successful Octagon debut? Get the know the newbies below and make your predictions…

JARED HAMMAN (LHW)
Experience: 10-1 record (all wins by stoppage in the first two rounds), with appearances in Strikeforce and ShoXC. Last competed in August 2008, where he avenged his only loss — a 15-second flying-knee-related TKO against Po’ai Suganuma that many felt was an early stoppage.
Will be facing: Alexander Gustafsson (see below)
Lowdown: A protege of Brian Warren at Unbreakable Gym and Vladimir Matyushenko at VMAT, the California-bred Jared Hamman was building up momentum as an exciting light-heavyweight prospect when his contract was put on ice in the wake of Pro Elite’s collapse. Or so he thought: "When EliteXC went down, I was told that my contract was being held and being transferred over to Strikeforce. I had plenty of opportunities to fight, but I was told that I couldn’t because I was still under contract…During a meeting with my manager it was discovered that I was a free agent. UFC made me an offer and I went with what I felt was the best decision…In the end, it has given me a whole year to work on my game and increase my skill."

From Sportsnet.ca:

Marquardt is on a three-fight win streak, most recently knocking out Demian Maia in 21 seconds at UFC 102. Sonnen has won his last two, scoring unanimous decisions over highly-regarded middleweights Dan Miller and Yushin Okami. It’s an interesting matchup that raises some important questions: First off, does this mean that Dan Henderson has officially left the UFC? Last week, Dana White said he was certain that Henderson had been signed by Strikeforce, though his manager denied it. And hey, would Chael Sonnen get the next shot at Anderson Silva (after Vitor Belfort gets his) if he manages to pull off an upset against Marquardt? Good Lord. Thanks a lot, Hendo.

The current lineup for UFC 110 (February 21st; Sydney, Australia) is after the jump…

(Josh Barnett’s most recent pro wrestling outing, courtesy of his MySpace page. If you’re dying to see how the match ends, go here.)

He may still be a black sheep in the MMA family, but that doesn’t mean Josh Barnett is going to hop a Greyhound for parts unknown and never call you again, even if you might want it that way.  The  "Baby-Faced Assassin" surfaced at the World Jiu-Jitsu No-Gi Championships in southern California this week long enough to win the "Ultra Heavyweight" (over 215 pounds) division with a judges’ decision over Bruno Paulista on Sunday.  Barnett crowed about the victory on his Twitter account, proclaiming "Catch Wrestling lives!", much to the chagrin of BJJ competitors like Pablo Popovitch, who told Graciemag.com before this event, "[W]e can’t let a guy who does catch wrestling win the Jiu-Jitsu World Championship."

Sorry, Pablo.  Guess Barnett never got that memo.  If you’re wondering what Barnett’s MMA future holds, apart from being the sport’s unsung savior, you should check out this video interview with Scott Coker where he says that Strikeforce has been in "loose contact" with Barnett, and once he works out his issues with the California State Athletic Commission, "maybe then we’ll be a little bit more interested."  You know.  If he works out those "issues."

Fedor vs. Rogers post-event press conference – Watch more Funny Videos

Here’s some footage I took at the Strikeforce post-event presser on Saturday night, which all the main event fighters showed up for. You’ve already heard what Fedor had to say, but check out the reactions from everybody else…

— Fabricio Werdum says he’s earned a shot at Fedor, who Werdum believes is the best fighter in the world. After a week of rest, he’ll be back to training hard.

— Gegard Mousasi says people underestimated Sokoudjou, and called the fight a learning experience.

— Jason Miller blames himself for not capitalizing on the chances he had in his fight against Jake Shields, and for not training his wrestling enough; he was not expecting a "grapplefest."

— Shields still thinks that his best weight is welterweight. Scott Coker would like to put him against Marius Zaromskis or Hayato Sakurai at 170.

— Shields thinks Cung Le is avoiding him. "That’s why he vacated the belt, obviously, and fights a month later."

(Khalidov vs. Santiago)

Apologies for the delay/lack of attention on this, but Sengoku’s eleventh event took place early Saturday in Tokyo. Some highlights/lowlights…

— The headlining featherweight match between Hatsu Hioki and Michihiro Omigawa featured two things that have become common in Sengoku: A shocking upset for perennial underdog Omigawa, and an inexplicably bad judges’ decision. Hioki controlled the fight with his grappling in the first round, and dominated the standup in the second. Though Omigawa rallied in the final frame, few expected him to take the split decision victory. Afterwards, even Omigawa disagreed with the scoring.

— Chechen-Polish upstart Mamed "Cannibal" Khalidov scored a surprise first-round knockout of Sengoku middleweight champ Jorge Santiago. After a takedown by Santiago, Khalidov was able to stun Santiago with a punch from the bottom, then scrambled to top position and quickly finished the fight. Because it was a non-title bout, Santiago remains the champion. Love it when that happens.

— Kevin Randleman and undefeated Bulgarian prospect Stanislav Nedkov put on a three-round wrestling match that ended with one judge scoring it for Nedkov and the other two calling it a draw. In keeping with Sengoku’s ridiculous traditions, the two judges who didn’t pick a winner were required to cast "must decision" votes, and Nedkov walked away with a split-decision victory. Full results plus more fight videos can be found after the jump.

If you were one of the people who actually sat through the commercials with an intense focus during Saturday night’s broadcast of Strikeforce on CBS, then you probably saw the impressive first ads for EA Sports’s MMA game, complete with what they claim is actual gameplay footage of Brett Rogers and Fedor Emelianenko going at it.  It’s no surprise that the people behind the bulk of great pro sports video games currently on the market managed to put together a good trailer for their first effort at an MMA game, but is the power of the EA Sports brand enough to compete with the UFC?  Sure, they’ve got Fedor.  They’ve got Mauro Ranallo screaming his head off.  They’ve got "Mayhem" Miller, even if he’s not pleased with his stats.

But say, just for the sake of argument, that you are both an MMA fan and a video game enthusiast.  How many different games do you really need at your disposal?  How important is it to you to be able to play as Fedor, rather than simply making your own off-brand version in the UFC game?  Does having the EA Sports label slapped on there matter, or is all pointless if you don’t have a digitized Dana White yelling at you? 

(‘I don’t want to freak you out or anything, Brett. But having you here in my arms, it just feels right, doesn’t it?’ Photo courtesy of SI.com)

After a brief layoff for scheduled maintenance to its supercomputer, the Potato Index is back to sort through the winners and losers of Saturday night’s Strikeforce event on CBS with its arbitrary numerical rankings system.  Huzzah!

Fedor Emelianenko +86
It’s hard to get a big boost in the Index when you’re a 5-1 favorite going into the fight, but he delivered with another right hand murderball, and even gave the casual fans a little blood for their trouble.  But were the ratings good enough to get CBS’s attention?

Brett Rogers +4
So he didn’t shock the world.  Honestly, who expected him to?  He still landed some good shots and took a couple as well, but the biggest positive for him is how he performed on the mat.  He’s still got some improvements to make, but he showed that he’s not all hype and a trendy haircut.