Before you click play on this Raw Vegas video, you should be warned that it features an arm being snapped like a pretzel stick in a fashion so nauseating you are very likely to throw up on your computer. Not trying to freak you out or anything. We just want you to be aware of what’s about to happen, so you don’t ruin a couple thousand dollars worth of electronics equipment and then try to blame it on us. Do we understand each other? Good, now go ahead and play it.

See, what did we tell you? What you’re seeing there is John Gettle, who is a student of Frank Mir’s, doing something terrible to a young man by the name of William Kowalski at a Tuff-N-Uff event in Las Vegas on Friday night. Somebody must have been filling Kowalski’s head with that ‘Jesus didn’t tap’ malarkey, because he held on in that kimura like he was waiting for his heavenly father to jump in and lend a hand. You can see for yourself how well that worked out.

Maybe it’s the sound of his arm cracking like a dry twig, or maybe it’s the way the limb snaps back like a rubber band that’s been stretched too far, but this is high in the running for the grossest arm break in MMA history.

(1:44 — "You ever been involved in anything like this before, BJ, besides the havoc that you wreak?")

If you’ve been near a TV or radio anytime today, you probably heard about the massive 8.8 magnitude earthquake that struck Chile early this morning, which triggered tsunami warnings in Hawaii. Thankfully, Hawaii seems to have dodged a bullet, wave-wise, but CNN was following the situation closely this afternoon, aided by local correspondent (and UFC lightweight champion) BJ Penn, who provided the cable news channel with a live video feed from his website and helped describe the scene on the ground; video of his segment is above. For more updates on the tsunami-watch in Hawaii, hit up BJPenn.com.

(Best finish of the night: Luke Rockhold vs. Paul Bradley)

Takayo Hashi may have been touted as the second-best 135-pound female fighter in the world coming into her title fight against Sarah Kaufman at last night’s Strikeforce Challengers event in San Jose, but for most of the five-round contest she looked woefully outmatched. Kaufman’s superior standup ruled the night, as the undefeated Canadian — and new "welterweight" women’s champion of Strikeforce — dropped Hashi twice in the first round, and spent the rest of the fight chasing the Japanese grappling specialist around the cage, landing punches whenever she was in range.

Kaufman successfully avoided the occasional takedown and submission attempts from her opponent, and outside of a teep kick that found its mark on her face in the final frame, she made it through all 25 minutes relatively untouched. After the fight’s conclusion — a 50-45 decision on all three judges’ scorecards — Kaufman apologized to the fans for her inability to finish Hashi, and generously credited Hashi’s constant movement: "It was really hard to get a lot of clean shots on her consecutively,” Kaufman said. “I would have loved to have finished the fight, but I couldn’t have done any more than I did.”

(See? This is why you can’t take Bader anywhere. Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle.)

- Lesnar weighs in on Frank Mir, predicts July return to UFC. (The Rumble)

- Dana White’s Jose Canseco media nightmare continues on ESPN. (Cagewriter)

- Bellator’s welterweight tourney matchups are set. (Heavy)

- Strikeforce’s Luke Rockhold says fighting in the ocean isn’t fun. (Fight Magazine)

- Is HGH testing in MMA feasible? (MMA Payout)

- Tito Ortiz was so young once, and actually sort of made sense. (The Garv)

- Cole Miller out of March 31 Fight Night bout with an injury. (MMA Weekly)

- Vitor Belfort loves his wife’s feet. (Fightlinker)

- Three freak show fights that ought to happen. (Bleacher Report)

- Canadian women’s hockey team knows how to celebrate. (Total Pro Sports)

- Top 10 bad movie babes. (Ask Men)

- Police searching for avid ESPN fan who robs banks. (Asylum)

- Emergency airlift of condoms headed to Olympic Village. (Scores Report)

- Your possibly NSFW Spicy Gallery for the week. (Break)

- What your car really says about you. (Holy Taco)

- Dolph Lundgren does Elvis, karate. (Screen Junkies)

- The best stadiums in America. (Made Man)

- NASCAR crew member narrowly misses getting run over. (All Left Turns)

- The exact wrong way to use a hand grenade. (Nothing Toxic)

(Proof that nobody looks cool when they’re about to sneeze. Photo courtesy of EdMulholland.com)

After his bloody win over Anthony Perosh at UFC 110, Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovic will still be getting a Duke Roufus-trained striker to stand and bang with at UFC 115, only new reports suggest that it won’t be Ben Rothwell, as previously expected.  MMA Scraps is reporting that Cro Cop and Pat Barry have been offered a chance to try and kick one another’s faces in when the UFC visits Vancouver.  Do we have to tell you that signing this fight is about as close as you can get to guaranteeing a highlight reel caliber knockout finish without actually paying one fighter to go in there and leave his chin wide open?  We didn’t think so.

But if Barry is getting Cro Cop, what of Rothwell?  The rumor is that he may now be getting Barry’s original opponent for UFC 115, Gilbert Yvel.  So basically, the stand-and-bang quotient just doubled.  Join us after the jump as we go ahead and get ourselves hyped for the awesomeness that awaits us.

(Props: YouTube.com/UFC)

You know what sucks? We have to wait three whole weeks until Jon Jones and Brandon Vera headline the UFC’s first event on Versus (March 21st; Broomfield, Colorado). What the hell are we going to do in the meantime?(And don’t say "Volunteer at a soup kitchen"; this is no time for jokes.) In the above hype-videos, Bones promises fireworks against Vera, and says he’ll give the Truth a striking war if that’s what he wants. He also makes a dig at Vera’s well-known hubris, saying he’s not the kind of guy to call out Chuck Liddell after winning his first UFC fight; Bones has a black belt in humility, apparently. Brandon Vera is aware that Jones has been blowing through his opponents, but feels that he’s never fought anybody on Brandon’s level, and his chin hasn’t been tested yet. ("It’s really easy to be the hammer, but it’s hard to be the nail.") Anybody see Vera winning this one? Anybody?

After the jump: Georges St. Pierre sweats alongside Michael Phelps in a new ad for Under Armour. Let’s be thankful this wasn’t an ad for Reebok.

(A black eye and the faintest hint of a smile. That’s our kind of woman. Photo by Esther Lin.)

Wednesday we tried to educate your ignorant asses on Takayo Hashi, the Japanese fighter who is one half of the 135-pound title fight on tonight’s Strikeforce: Challengers show (you made your FightPicker selections yet, by the way?). It’s only fair that we also shine the spotlight on her opponent in tonight’s main event, the undefeated Sarah Kaufman.

In addition to having a perfect 10-0 record that includes wins over the likes of Miesha Tate (one of MMA’s hottest women, let’s not forget) and Shayna Baszler, Kaufman also has the distinction of winning all but two of her fights via TKO stoppage. She may not win pretty, but she’s a gritty fighter who likes to stand and bang and will not give you a second to breathe once the bell rings. If you need another barometer aside from her record to tell you how dominant she’s been, just look at the odds on her fight against Hashi. She’s fighting the #2-ranked fighter in her weight class, and bookmakers still expect it to be a blowout.

Biographical notes: Kaufman was a dancer from age two, but transitioned to fighting because it is far more awesome. She’s from Victoria, British Columbia, and yet bravely missing tonight’s Canada-Slovakia hockey game in order to fight for a title. She’s more or less estranged from her family, who she says “weren’t bad parents,” but were not active or health conscious or terribly supportive of her fighting career. See her in action after the jump.

Our friends at Fight Magazine have struck gold again with their Fight! Life video series (you haven’t forgotten all that stuff with Bas Rutten already, have you?), this time by talking to Eddie Bravo about one of his favorite subjects: weed.  Like many great romances, things were rocky between them at first, so much so that it even prevented Eddie from getting laid.  But just when you think this is going to be a sad, sad story, he starts a sentence with, "There was this girl at the strip club…" 

As is usually the case, that’s the point where the story starts to get interesting and doubtful all at the same time.  If that’s not enough to liven up your Friday, check out the latest effort from professional video editing lol-machine lookoutawhale after the jump.

("These barbarian Americans," Fedor thought to himself. "Worshipping laminated rectangles with names on them.")

Strikeforce has been laying suspiciously low lately, leading some to wonder if they’re having behind-the-scenes problems with Fedor Emelianenko or their broadcast partners; Gegard Mousasi‘s departure from M-1 two weeks ago added another wrinkle to the mystery. Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker tried to shed what light he could yesterday, telling reporters that the organization would hold an event in Nashville, Tennessee, on April 17th, and that more announcements would come next week. No, it’s not much to work on. But recent reports have also clued us in on the following…

— The middleweight title fight between Jake Shields and Dan Henderson is a done deal for April. Said Shields: "I have a date (and) venue, but they told me to hold that back. Hopefully CBS. I think it’s CBS. There’s a slight possibility of Showtime because they’re still (working it out). I don’t know the rest of the card or any of that yet. But me and Dan’s on, and I’m hoping it’s on CBS."

Antonio mckee highlights by Biodome10

Last night, many of us were shocked and saddened by a video floating around the ‘net that featured Chuck Liddell, completely naked, working out with his girlfriend, also completely naked. The video was notable for a number of reasons:

1) The girlfriend has been I.D.’d as Jose Canseco’s ex, Heidi Northcott. I will now pat myself on the back for my powers of observation.

2) Chuck didn’t wipe down the machine when he was done with it.

3) As CageWriter put it, “is the camera man a crazy, obsessed fan? How is this person still alive?”

4) After the video was originally taken off YouTube, it popped up on DailyMotion under the title “Antonio mckee highlights,” which is brilliant because nobody would ever think to search for that.

(Photo courtesy of Fight Magazine)

If you thought Frank Mir‘s apology on UFC.com for his remarks about Brock Lesnar didn’t sound like it came entirely from a place of sorrow deep within his heart, congratulations, you’re a tough one to fool.  I spoke with Mir yesterday for this SI.com column and he confirmed that, even after he was called in to the UFC offices and chided for the comment, he still didn’t really understand what the big deal was:

"When I got called in and they told me, ‘Listen man, this is an issue,’ I kind of had a smirk on my face the whole time," says Mir, who was quoted in a public apology for the remark on the UFC’s Web site earlier this week. "I was like, you’re kidding, right? This is a joke, right? I’ve heard people say that this is to the death. I’ve heard people say about an opponent, ‘I’m going to kill him.’ I heard Brock say he was going to put his hand up my rear end to pull out a horseshoe. I didn’t hear anyone get too upset about that."

(Dammit Bob, why is it that every time I get a really good Asian girl fantasy going you have to show up and ruin it?)

While Gina Carano and "Rampage" Jackson have been getting tons of press for their recent movie roles, some of which have a funny way of leading to complete breakdowns with their regular employers, Bob Sapp‘s acting career continues to fly under the radar.  Why "Frankenhood" didn’t get the critical acclaim it deserved, we’ll never know, but now Sapp has a new project to keep him (hopefully) far, far away from MMA.  According to LatinoReview.com, Sapp landed the role of Ukafa in the upcoming "Conan" movie, which will reportedly also feature "The Wrestler’s" Mickey Rourke and will obviously fall so far short of the original Conan movie that those of us who grew up on it will die a little inside after forcing ourselves to sit through it.  At least we’ll have Sapp’s skills as a thespian to look forward to.

How about telling us a little something about the role Bob will be playing, just so we can see if it’s within his range as an actor or not:

Between the ring girls, apparel models, television hosts, and the lady-fighters themselves, MMA is a damn fine sport to follow if you appreciate beautiful women. (And my God, do we ever.) So we figured, why not throw together our favorite females from all corners of the fight game and see how they stack up against each other? Enjoy the pics, and let us know how you’d rank ‘em in the comments section. And if you like this list, Digg it!

#12) MIESHA TATE

Hot Contender: Spending her high school years on the boys’ wrestling team gave Miesha Tate the grit she needed to fight in cages for a living. These days, "Takedown Tate" is one of the top-ten 135-pound female fighters in the world, and the combination of her nasty ground-and-pound and natural sex appeal has made her a rising star. You can see Miesha in action next month at Strikeforce Challengers 7 as she takes on Zoila Frausto. 

#11) LAURA CELESTE

Hot East Coast Girl: A native of Staten Island, Laura is a local legend among MMA fans in New York and New Jersey thanks to her ring-girl appearances for fight clubs like Ring of Combat and Asylum Fight League. As a professional hot chick, she has tremendous upside; let’s hope this exciting prospect gets her shot at the majors sooner rather than later.

(Sarah Kaufman gives us the score on her MMA career and what she expects in her title bout with Takayo Hashi on Friday night.)

Yesterday on Twitter our pals over at Fight Magazine suggested that you’d have to be a “a real degenerate” to bet on Strikeforce: Challengers fights. We see where they’re coming from. Betting on fights, sometimes between relative unknowns, could be construed as a sign that you’re the kind of maniac who will bet on anything, whether it’s a fight between two stray cats or a UFC main event. That might be true…if you lose those bets. My friends, the Enabler does not plan on losing this weekend. Not if he wants to keep his legs in good working order, and he really, really wants that.

The best lines on the internet come to us courtesy of BestFightOdds.com:

Sarah Kaufman (-575) vs. Takayo Hashi (+500)
Trevor Prangley (-350) vs. Karl Amoussou (+330)
Luke Rockhold (-185) vs. Paul Bradley (+180)
James Terry (-130) vs. Tarec Saffiedine (+130)
Raul Castillo (+101) vs. Yancy Medeiros (-111)

The breakdown…

(Noons celebrates a TKO [via cut] victory over Diaz, which he is sure will shut Nick up for good. Yep, he’s definitely heard the last of this bit of business.)

KJ Noons may have temporarily abandoned his dreams of boxing greatness to return to MMA, but you can forget any hopes you had of seeing him jump right back in against Nick Diaz in Strikeforce. Noons’s first fight back will instead take place at Dream.13 on March 22, where he’ll face Brazilian lightweight Andre “Dida” Amado. For those of you who don’t know, “Dida” is a Muay Thai specialist who is 6-3-1 in his six-year career, and he’s coming off three straight losses, including a submission defeat to Gesias Cavalcante and a TKO loss to Eddie Alvarez.

In other words, this fight is not exactly a leap back into the shark tank of MMA. It’s more like easing into a hot bath filled with some mildly pissed off lake trout. But hey, maybe that’s what Noons needs to get reacquainted with all this kicking and kneeing and grappling stuff. It has been almost two years since his last MMA fight, a TKO victory over Yves Edwards. Maybe he needs to beat up a Brazilian in Japan, get comfortable again, and then it’s back to the U.S. to show Nick Diaz that he is totally not scared, homey. That’s how it would go down in our perfect world, anyway.

(Props: FightersOnly)

Just because Quinton Jackson is returning to the Octagon to fight Rashad Evans, it doesn’t mean things are all lovey-dovey between the former light-heavyweight champ and the UFC. Judging from the above video interview, Rampage still holds a serious grudge about the way he was treated during his un-authorized break to go shoot The A-Team, and he’s ready to leave MMA behind and move on with his life:

After a week of furious battle, we’re pleased to announce the five winners in our Wrong Side of Town caption contest. Picking up the DVDs are…

Duncdaddyfunk (17% of the vote): Kimbo lures in his prey with a photo op before dunking his tiny hands in gold and making fist necklaces out of them.

ddbissel (16%): I dont like Kimbo being this close to the ground.

Vlad (14%): Say what you will, but at least he’s a more credible opponent than the guys Bobby Lashley’s fighting.

drunkenmime (12%): Miami’s toughest street fighter poses for a picture with Kimbo slice.

CheckHisPee (11%): "Yo little man, do you pooh regular or do pellets be droppin?"

If your name has been called, please send your real name and address to feedback@cagepotato.com, and get ready for an action-packed thrill ride starring two pro wrestlers, a formerly-popular rapper, and whatever the hell an "Omarion" is. Props to Lion’s Gate for the hookup, and thanks to everyone who played!

Josh Barnett isn’t the only troubled MMA fighter who doesn’t mind spending his free time beating up on guys who aren’t really on his level.  Aleksander Emelianenko likes himself a good mismatch almost as much as he likes tattoos, so naturally it just made sense for him to totally rule the 2010 Russian Combat Sambo Championships.  In keeping with the Emelianenko family’s proud Sambo history, Aleks took home the gold medal after roughing up a couple of guys who seemed like they didn’t particularly want to be in there with him, and then finished with a fun little romp against old pal Kiril "Baby Fedor" Sidelnikov in the finals. 

Check out that bout, where they apparently love each other too much to throw hands, after the jump.  Make sure to pay close attention to how both men use the handshake as an opportunity to jump their opponent at different points in the match.  The Russian crowd just can’t get enough of that gag.

Five months after hacking through Marcin Najman in his MMA debut, five-time World’s Strongest Man winner Mariusz Pudzianowski will return to the cage at KSW 13 (May 7th, Warsaw), likely against 40-year-old Polish fighter Robert Paczków. A former Greco-Roman wrestling competitor and Sumo champion, Paczków’s only MMA fight took place at a Cage Rage event in December 2007 against TUF 10 vet James McSweeney, who was 1-0 at the time. As you can see in the video above, McSweeney was taken down and smothered by the 300+ pound Pole in short order. At the vid’s 2:10 mark, McSweeney is forced to tap to what the ring announcer calls an "arm choke," but what looked more like a reverse mooboplata from our angle. Though Pudzianowski will still enjoy a strength advantage against Paczków, it’ll be interesting to see if Paczków’s sheer girth and grappling prowess will pose problems for the 33-year-old strongman. If you can read Polish, you’ll find more info on KSW 13 right here.

After the jump: A rockin’ music video from Mariusz and his brother Krystian (aka Pudzian Band). Plus, Mariusz shows off his pad on the Polish version of MTV Cribs.

(Brock Lesnar might be worth killing, but Kongo? He’s barely worth an assault charge. Photo courtesy of Fight Magazine.)

In the wake of Frank Mir’s apology for saying that he’d like to kill Brock Lesnar in the Octagon, many people have paused to take a step back and recall that Mir isn’t the first person to invoke death when speaking about a former opponent. For instance, there’s B.J. Penn, who told Sean Sherk he was dead and later assured Georges St. Pierre that they’d be fighting to the death. There’s also Lesnar himself who, as Zak Woods points out, actually said he wanted to “murder” Mir at UFC 100. And yet no apology followed. No public outcry. So what’s the difference?

Some would say it’s the specificity of Mir’s remark. Not only did he detail exactly how he wanted Lesnar to die (something about a broken neck), he also said he wanted Lesnar to be the first person to die from “Octagon-related injuries.” You could argue that it was Mir’s attention to detail that got him in trouble, but then again, Lesnar said murder. As in, the type of killing that is always a crime. That’s why there’s a word to differentiate it from kiliing in self-defense, or an accident, or war, or an execution. Everyone from the Romans to the Victorians to the dudes poking one another’s eyes out in the Code of Hammurabi generally agreed that murder is bad and should be avoided.

So why no outrage or forced apology?

(Props: MMA Scraps)

So we’re sending this guy to interview Dana White, but the guy isn’t really very likable or well-dressed or even remotely photogenic. What should we do? I know, let’s have him wear sunglasses inside and act like a total jerk. That will solve all out problems!

This, we can only assume, was the thought process behind this interview with Dana White to discuss the UFC’s “Undisputed 2010” video game. The result is predictably cloying, and all we really learn is that 2010 is better than its predecessor, which is a) sort of expected, and b) what DW would say even if it weren’t. Then, because this whole thing was apparently plotted by junior high students who only know one way to end a skit, it culminates in an act of fake violence. And what’s most disappointing?  Not one mention of the inclusion of Kimbo Slice haymakers.  What a missed opportunity.

(Hashi celebrates after choking out Chisa Yonezawa last April. Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

Now that Strikeforce has gotten their heads out of their asses and made the 135-pound title fight between Sarah Kaufman and Takayo Hashi the headlining match at this Friday’s Challengers show, it’s time to ask ourselves: Wait, who’s Takayo Hashi again? Well, according to the Unified Women’s Mixed Martial Arts Rankings, she’s the #2-ranked 135-pounder in the world, directly behind Kaufman. The 32-year-old Wajyutsu Keisyukai product holds a record of 12-1 (eight wins by decision, four by submission, none by KO/TKO), competing primarily in Japan’s now-defunct Smackgirl promotion. Her only loss came against Hitomi "Girlfight Monster" Akano in August 2005, and Hashi won a rematch two years later.

Hashi is primarily known as a grappler, and is backed by some impressive credentials. She placed third in her weight class at the 2007 ADCC’s, and picked up the title of "Grappling Queen" in Smackgirl’s open-weight division. In a recent interview, Hashi had some strong words for her opponent:

Videos of three of Takayo’s fights are after the jump…

(Images courtesy of twitter.com/Rampage4real and twitter.com/SugaRashadEvans.)

The long-rumored UFC 114 headlining matchup between Quinton "Rampage" Jackson and Rashad Evans is a go, according to updates posted last night on the fighters’ Twitter pages. It will be the first fight in over 14 months for Rampage, who went AWOL following his decision victory over Keith Jardine last March in order to film The A-Team. (UFC 114 goes down just two weeks before the film’s release date. That’s called "synergy," brah.) Evans most recently won a decision over Thiago Silva in January

We’re confident that Jackson and Evans can re-build the heat of this matchup back up to TUF 10 levels. But Rampage fans may have reason to worry. According to a recent mailbag column by Yahoo!’s Kevin Iole: "[Jackson] isn’t close to being in shape now, though his Muay Thai coach, Dave Jackson, insists he’s already working hard. But I saw him in Australia and he looked plenty plump to me. I was also surprised to see him smoking a cigarette."

Well, if it can happen to Gerard Butler, it can happen to anyone. Let’s hope Rampage spends these next three months wisely. UFC 114′s tentative lineup is after the jump…

(‘And that stuff about your mother? Man, I downloaded those jokes off the internet. I’ve never even seen a picture of your mom, but I’m sure she’s a really nice lady who totally doesn’t have sex for money. At least not, you know, in a direct exchange.’

In case you haven’t heard, Frank Mir got himself into hot water recently when he went slightly out of his mind and said that he would like to kill Brock Lesnar in the Octagon. That might not sound like a big deal at first, but the problem is that he didn’t say it in the ‘Dude, you’re totally dead’ kind of way that B.J. Penn did. He said it in the extremely detailed and very literal way, as in, “I want to break [Lesnar’s] neck in the ring. I want him to be the first person that dies to Octagon-related injuries."

Yeah, you can see why that might be a problem for the organization trying to get regulated as a legitimate, non-lethal sport. Today the UFC issued a statement on its website that included a quote from Dana White, who said he was “disappointed” with Mir’s comments, adding:

“He’s been talked to, he regrets what he said, and he won’t be saying anything like that again.”

Naturally, Mir himself also had to make nice:

(Give Cofield credit, he isn’t afraid to just put it out there and say, ‘Why are you doing this?’ in the tone of a man trying to talk some sense into his alcoholic cousin.)

Sometimes I wonder if Jose Canseco is one of the dumbest former pro athletes out there, or if he is so brilliant that he merely seems dumb to those of us who can’t fully grasp the depth of his wisdom. Listening to the guy explain why we have wars and how those wars are just the large scale version of the petty criticism we perpetrate against one another on a daily basis, I could feel my mind slowing being blown into millions of tiny pieces. Then he said that Herschel Walker’s insistence on not fighting him was a “negotiating ploy,” and I was forced to completely disregard my theory of Canseco as an unappreciated genius.

You see, unlike Canseco, Walker is not desperate for cash and attention. The guy donated his Strikeforce payday to a church. Typically, guys who are fighting for charity do not engage in negotiating ploys to drive their price tag up. If they wanted their charity to have more money, they’d just give it to them personally. If they didn’t have that kind of money to give, they probably wouldn’t be fighting for charity.

Is any of this getting through, Jose? Are you even still reading? You became distracted by a dog with a puffy tail midway through the first paragraph, didn’t you? You know what, just forget it. You keep after Herschel Walker. After all, you’ve been doing this longer than him.

From an announcement posted this morning on UFC.com:

While we appreciate everybody who entered our latest caption contest, the sad fact is that you can’t all be winners. In fact, we can say right now that all but nine of you are definitely losers. After slogging through over 250 entries, we’ve selected some finalists, which you can read below. Please vote for your favorite in the poll on the right; the top five vote-getters will all score Wrong Side of Town DVDs. So without further ado…

Randle McMurphy: Kimbo and Jared Shaw reminisce about the good old days.

Vlad: Say what you will, but at least he’s a more credible opponent than the guys Bobby Lashley’s fighting.

Duncdaddyfunk: Kimbo lures in his prey with a photo op before dunking his tiny hands in gold and making fist necklaces out of them.

CheckHisPee: "Yo little man, do you pooh regular or do pellets be droppin?"

ddbissel: I dont like Kimbo being this close to the ground.

Contraband: Kimbo takes time out of his training for a quick pic with Shonie Carter’s son.

drunkenmime: Miami’s toughest street fighter poses for a picture with Kimbo slice.

PurplePickle: Choking back tears of joy as the camera flashed, Curtis Sample was ready to let everybody on Facebook know exactly how he rolled.

steampunk22: Don’t FUCK with the Lollipop Guild.

(He will hurt you, but only as much as is absolutely necessary.)

Those of us who were a little concerned with Mirko “Cro Cop” Filipovic’s apparent inability to put away Anthony Perosh at UFC 110 should just calm down a second, says the former Pride great. According to Cro Cop, the reason he didn’t put away a bloodied and battered Perosh was because he “couldn’t do that to him when he was so bloody.” This claims prompts the inevitable question, you getting soft on us, Mirko?

It’s hard to say just yet, but it seems as though Filipovic will cut you some slack if you take a fight out of your weight class on short notice:

“I admire Perosh for accepting the fight. There were much better fighters there who turned it down but I understand why; they did not have time to prepare. [But] I am very sorry that I had to hurt Perosh. I tried to fight with as much consideration for him as I could. I even avoided the ground because I am 7, 8 kilos heavier than he is.”

(The UFC’s bloody Sunday, courtesy of MMA-Core.)

We know, the Index is a little late this week. We could say it has something to do with UFC 110 taking place in Australia, maybe make up some transparent lie about it taking longer to crunch the numbers when the fights happen in the Southern Hemisphere. But you’d never believe that…or would you?

Cain Velasquez +167
Even if Big Nog may be on the decline, beating him still means something. Finishing him means even more, and doing it in the first round, via brutal KO, means you just might be the next big thing. Suddenly the UFC’s heavyweight class has more viable challengers than they know what to do with. Talk about a good problem to have.

Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira -101
Seeing Nogueira get knocked out cold is a little like seeing a unicorn die of a heart attack. You never thought you’d ever live to see it, and afterwards you kind of wish you never had.

("Hmm. This is not how things went down during my positive visualization sessions." Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

After being soundly thrashed by Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovic on two days’ notice at UFC 110, Anthony "The Hippo" Perosh has been signed to a four-fight deal by the UFC, according to a report on InfiniteMMA. Perosh sports a career record of 10-6, a UFC record of 0-3 (including losses to Jeff Monson and Christian Wellisch in 2006) and victories over a bunch of random Australians. On paper, he has absolutely no chance of making an impact in the UFC’s light-heavyweight division, and the UFC’s next Australian event won’t be until next year at the earliest. But it just goes to show you that dreams do come true when you ignore your natural instinct for self-preservation and take guaranteed losses against larger MMA legends who have gone through actual training camps. Kudos, Anthony.

We’re still waiting to hear if anybody got un-signed after UFC 110. As predicted, Keith Jardine and Stephan Bonnar are in danger after taking their third-straight losses, but Dana White’s affection for the Dean and the Psycho could potentially save their jobs. Igor Pokrajac is toast, though, no question. Stay tuned…