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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

August, 2010

Belfort Reveals He Will Be Back in the Octagon in October and it Will Not Be Against Anderson Silva

 

Apparently Vitor wasn’t bullshitting when he said he isn’t waiting around for Anderson Silva to heal from his rib injury to fight the UFC middleweight champ next spring. According to the former UFC light heavyweight champion, he will take another fight in the mean time which should appease those who believe that he should at least have one fight at middleweight in the Octagon before getting a title shot.

The question is, who should he fight?

The UFC’s middleweight division has not shortage of contenders, but most of the usual suspects are already committed to fights and would have to abridge their training camps — that is if they escape their upcoming fights without any injuries.

Let’s look at the candidates for facing Belfort.

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If You Don’t Mind, ‘Mayhem’ Miller Has Some Opinions About Nick Diaz He’d Like to Shout at You


(You taking notes, Tapout? Now *that’s* how you make an MMA T-shirt. VidProps: YouTube/Helwani)

At this point, it would basically constitute an act of grievous, unforgivable promotional negligence if Strikeforce fails to put Jason “Mayhem” Miller in the cage with Nick Diaz this October. When two of your most popular and similarly-sized fighters have a real life beef that comes preloaded with hype from a giant, in-ring brawl your company already aired on national television, it doesn’t exactly take P.T. Fuckin’ Barnum to figure out what to do. Unfortunately, since grievous, unforgivable promotional negligence is what Strikeforce does best these days, this fight will probably never happen.

And you know who’s going to be really pissed about that? I mean, besides us? Mayhem Miller, that’s who. As evidenced by the above video with Ariel Helwani the very topic of Diaz makes Miller totally incapable of using his “inside voice.”

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KJ Noons Says He Isn’t a Dirty Fighter; He Just Plays One on TV


(I gotta split, man. KITT is double parked out front.)

According to Strikeforce lightweight KJ Noons, he isn’t a dirty fighter and he says fans shouldn’t be swayed by popular opinion about a late punch he connected with after the bell in the first round and a questionable knee he landed to his downed opponent Jorge Gurgel in the second round during their Strikeforce: Houston bout on Saturday night.

"I’m not trying to be dirty," Noons said. "I’m just trying to finish the fight."

The fighter with the Hasselhoff hair explained the late shot to MMAJunkie, pointing to the fact that he wanted to ensure he won the round and that he didn’t even hear the bell.

"I didn’t hear the bell," Noons said. "I heard the 10 seconds. When you hear the 10 seconds, being a fighter, this is your chance. I don’t know if I won that round. I don’t know if he won that round. You want to end every round showing out good. A lot of guys do a takedown. For myself, I want to get that last couple combos in to maybe finish the round good and win the round."

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Throwdown/CagePotato Wallpaper Design Contest: Vote for the Finalists!

The day is finally upon us. After a very fruitful submission period, we’re ready to announce the 12 finalists of our desktop wallpaper contest, presented by Throwdown. Check them out after the jump, and vote for your favorite in the poll over on the right. (If you have trouble using our poll, please e-mail contest@cagepotato.com and include which Internet browser and operating system you’re using.) Please get your votes in by Thursday at midnight ET. On Friday, we’ll announce the first-place winner, who will receive the following Throwdown gear, pictured above:

– an All Over Print Duffle Bag
– a Logo Flexfit Hat
– a pair of On Top Remix Shoes
– a Throwdown Hoodie or Thermal of your choice
– 2 Throwdown by Affliction "T"s of your choice
– 2 Large Throwdown Stickers

Now, on to the brilliance…

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‘Sengoku 14′ Results and Videos: Santiago Defends Middleweight Belt in Wild Rematch With Misaki


(Hatsu Hioki vs. Jeff Lawson; video courtesy of ZombieProphetMMA)

A year and a half after Jorge Santiago scored a fifth-round comeback submission against Kazuo Misaki to win Sengoku’s middleweight title, the two fighters met again in the main event of yesterday’s Sengoku Raiden Championships 14 in Tokyo. And once again, Santiago managed to pull out a stoppage in the final round, forcing Misaki’s corner to throw in the towel with just 29 seconds left in the fight — a fortunate outcome indeed, considering that Santiago was down on the scorecards.

"The Grabaka Hitman" controlled the first two rounds thanks in large part to his grappling, scoring two takedowns in the opening frame, and threatening with a guillotine choke and full mount in the second. The bout entered "Fight of the Year" territory beginning in the third. Santiago surged back, dropping Misaki with a head kick and smashing him with strikes from the top. It looked grim for the Japanese fighter, but Misaki survived and turned the tables once again in the fourth round, flooring Santiago with punches then working some knees to the head; Santiago intentionally rolled under the ropes to escape the abuse and was slapped with a red card. When the action was re-started, Santiago scored another knockdown of his own during a fierce striking exchange and pounded on Misaki to the bell.

The final round began with another knockdown by Santiago. After a couple of submission attempts from the reigning champ didn’t pan out, Misaki swept Santiago, then Santiago swept Misaki. Santiago seized his moment, firing down hammerfists and punches until Misaki was turtled and helpless. The referee wasn’t quite convinced, but Misaki’s corner had seen enough, and threw in the towel at 4:31 of round 5. Santiago retains his Sengoku middleweight belt in another dramatic performance, while Misaki suffers his third defeat in four fights.

In other action, Akihiro Gono took a suprising decision loss against Mongolian K-1 vet Jadamba Narantungalag, top-ten featherweight Hatsu Hioki notched a first-round submission over a very game Jeff Lawson, and former top-ten welterweight Nick Thompson ate his third consecutive stoppage loss against Sengoku newcomer Taisuke Okuno. Full event results and video of the Santiago/Misaki battle are after the jump…

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‘Strikeforce: Houston’ Aftermath, Part II: Brazil Puts Rest of World on Notice


(King Mo was skeptical about looking into the strange man’s pinhole projector, but eventually his curiosity about seeing a total eclipse of the sun got the better of him. PicProps: Strikeforce)

Aside from the hapless Jorge Gurgel – who has lived in the States so long his nationality could most accurately be listed as “Ohioan,” anyway – Saturday night’s Strikeforce: Houston card couldn’t have gone much better for the promotion’s Brazilian contingent. From Rafael "Feijao" Cavalcante stopping Muhammed Lawal to claim the light heavyweight title in the main event to  Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza winning the 185-pound strap after a fight with Tim Kennedy that wasn’t really as close as a lot of people are trying to allege, Brazil pretty much owned everybody’s asses last night.  Again.

In unrelated news, Bobby Lashley lost to some guy whose sideburns made him look like he should be playing trombone in a third-wave ska band. All of our deepest fears and darkest suspicions about the former pro-wrestler’s heart and MMA skills were confirmed. Goddamn it felt good.

Somewhere, whatever notes Scott Coker had scribbled on the back of a Motel 6 brochure about the future of his company probably got crumpled up and tossed in a trash can.

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‘Strikeforce: Houston’ Aftermath: Pretty Much Everyone Does the Worst Possible Job During Gurgel vs. Noons


(VidProps: YouTube/KarelMMArts)

Even 12 hours later, it’s difficult to fully grasp the ways in which Jorge Gurgel’s fight with KJ Noons turned into a terrible abortion at Saturday night’s Strikeforce: Houston show. Suffice it to say, a lot of things went horribly wrong and nearly everyone involved failed miserably to do their jobs.

As he almost always does, Gurgel came into the fight with the worst possible game plan, essentially guaranteeing defeat before the bout even started. Meanwhile, Noons crammed not one, but two blatantly illegal strikes into just over five minutes of fighting. For his part, referee Kerry Hatley seemed not to notice either of the infractions, then totally bungled one of the more obvious stoppage situations you’ll ever encounter in MMA. All the while the Strikeforce broadcast team reconfirmed for viewers its complete inability to adjust on the fly when even the slightest controversy rears its head.

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‘Strikeforce: Houston’ — Live Results + Commentary

King Mo Muhammed Lawal Rafael Feijao Cavalcante Strikeforce
(Focused and ready for battle, King Mo stares into his opponent’s eyes, desperately trying to remember who the hell this dude is. Photo courtesy of allelbows.com)

Two title fights in the light-heavyweight and middleweight divisions, a lightweight slugfest between KJ Noons and Jorge Gurgel, and Bobby Lashley‘s latest bit of record-padding, all brought to you by the world-famous City of Syrup. Let’s be real — if you’re not watching Strikeforce tonight, you’re a damn fool. Or, you don’t have Showtime. Or, you have better things to do. Speaking of which, your usual live-bloggers are occupied tonight, so respected CagePotato contributor Matt Kaplan will be filling in. Round-by-round updates can be found after the jump, beginning at 10 p.m. ET. Refresh the page for all the latest, and let your voices be heard in the comments section. 
 

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Bigfoot Silva is Cool with Whoever Strikeforce Wants Him to Lose to in His Next Fight


(It was 5:15 and still no sign of the cable guy, but Antonio Silva wasn’t about to call that bitch at Comcast customer service again. PicProps: Strikeforce)

So the Strikeforce heavyweight division has come to this: With Fab Werdum injured and Fedor Emelianenko reportedly warming up to the idea of re-upping with the company following his next bout, Scott Coker and Co. appear intent on feeding Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva to either Fedor or champ Alistair Overeem in the coming months. To what end? Unclear, but with Silva the only legitimate (and healthy) 265-pound contender on the roster who hasn’t suffered a seemingly career defining loss lately, maybe it’s the only thing they can do.

At best, a fight pitting Bigfoot against either Overeem or Emelianenko is a place-holder. Just something to do until the promotion can suffer through another round of prickly negotiations with M-1 Global — rumor is Fedor won’t sign a goddamned thing until Strikeforce ponies up the dough for that racecar bed he’s had his eye on – and takes another crack at getting its two best heavies in the cage with each other.  At worst, the Brazilian gigantor actually wins. Then what are you going to do? A Werdum vs. Silva rematch to determine who is The Greatest Fighter of All Time? Don’t think so.

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Video Evidence: Dan Quinn vs. Aaron Brink


(We’ll always have South Bend. VidProps:
YouTube/Marijuana Muscle)

Well, for once it turned out Dan Quinn wasn’t just bullshitting us. The World’s Most Craziest Man really did fight UFC vet and former reality TV star Aaron Brink in some kind of bizarre-o “striking only” bout last night. Not to ruin it for you, but the results are sadly predictable for anyone who knows,  in general, what a bad idea it is to sanction a fight featuring A) A crazy man or B) A guy who just got out of jail. In this case, Dan Quinn falls into both categories. (Ed. Note: Somewhere in the bowels of the San Diego lock-up, I hope you’re paying attention, War Machine. This is your future.)

Perhaps the California State Athletic Commission has some kind of minimum required amount of mental illness that must be present in the cage at all times, because some genius opted to let our man Sensei Cecil referee this bad boy. Homey plays it pretty straight during the first round, but then breaks out his patented karate chop to begin round two.  If you don’t want  further spoilers, don’t follow the jump until after you’ve watched the “fight.”

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