regret gifs
15 Moments of Instant Regret [GIFs]

October, 2010

Wednesday Morning MMA Link Club: Y’Ever Notice How White People Eat Sandwiches?


(Cain Velasquez and George Lopez enjoy a PBJ and milk in honor of Brock Lesnar’s cracker-ass heritage. Props: fpvault)

– Five Lessons: UFC 121 Edition (Versus MMA Beat)

- Cesar Gracie Says Jake Shields Is the Guy to Beat GSP (FightMagazine)

– Dana White: Brock Lesnar Is Not Going Back to WWE (LowKick)

- Court McGee Not Entirely Pleased With Performance in UFC 121 Win (MMA Fighting)

– The IRS Put a Lien On James Toney’s UFC 118 Fight Purse (MMA Convert)

– Marquardt vs. Okami Winner Guaranteed Title Shot (Heavy.com/MMA)

– Bellator Finalizes Line-Up for Thursday Night’s Season-Ending Event (Five Ounces of Pain)

– Playboy Playmate LaTasha Marzolla Gets Her Arm Snapped in an MMA Bout (MiddleEasy)

– Herb Dean Talks Refereeing and Judging and His New Line of Condoms (MMA Scraps)

– UFC President Dana White Talks Jon Jones, Jose Aldo on the Fight Fix (SBNation.com/MMA)

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Lesnar Tops Money Earners of UFC 121′s Reported $1.5 Million Payroll With $400,000


(Pic props PeterYongArt)

Brock Lesnar may have been the biggest loser at last weekend’s UFC 121 event, but the former UFC heavyweight champion was also compensated the most out of any of the fighters on the card for his performance against Cain Velasquez in California.

According to figures released by the California State Athletic Commission, Lesnar pocketed a cool $400,000 for his knockout loss to Velasquez, which may or may not have been partially used to purchase some burritos and Coronas that night.

Check out the breakdown after the jump of who made what Saturday night from the reported $1.513 million payroll and $280,000 "of the Night" bonuses.

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War Machine Big House Blogs 9 and 10: Fan Mail, Uniting Nations and Scrabble With Imaginary Fighters


("Instead of another grenade, I just wanted a huge pull-pin on this side to symbolize me blowing my own mind.")

Sometimes we get so caught up in our everyday lives that we forget about life’s little pleasures — like War Machine waxing poetically about the universe and his prison experiences.

It’s sad to say, but I’m almost more interested in reading his blog than I am watching him fight. Chalk it up to my ADHD and my fascination with Machine’s bizarre take on life, but I enjoy reading about his latest exploits behind bars.

In the latest double installment, the little scamp America fell in love with on TUF 6 when he still went by Jon Koppenhaver broaches a number of pressing issues like how he bridged his block’s racial gap, why he got thrown in segregation and couldn’t post last week and how he passes the time playing Scrabble with imaginary versions of past and present UFC fighters.

Nelson Mandela ain’t got nothin’ on War Machine.

Check out War’s latest deep thoughts and shenanigans after the jump.

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Dana White To Make ‘Major Announcement’ on Thursday

Dana White Paris Hilton UFC
("I know, dude. Twins. We’re feeling pretty fucking blessed right now.")

The UFC sent out a short but provocative notice to members of the press earlier today, declaring that UFC President Dana White will make a "major announcement" during a media conference call this Thursday at 10:00 a.m. PT / 1:00 p.m. ET. And that’s pretty much it; no hints as to the nature of this announcement were given whatsoever. Which means that, being responsible bloggers, it is now time to speculate wildly.

In a broadcastingcable.com interview published yesterday, White was pressed on his company’s upcoming television strategy, to which he responded "we are working on a couple moves now and should be in a billion homes around the world in the next couple months." A billion, you guys. Though he wouldn’t share details, he promised that the UFC would be on network television for the first time in 2011 — maybe on Fox, maybe on NBC, maybe both — and that the UFC could start its own network "within the next couple years."

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Matt Hughes Doesn’t See What the Big Deal is, But is Still Happy ‘The Mexicans’ Have Their Champion

(We feel pretty comfortable saying this is the best Oasis/Green Day/Footage-of-Matt-Hughes-blasting-wild-pigs-with-a-laser-sited-crossbow mash-up on the internet today. VidProps: YouTube/LaserLyte)

Here’s a subtle hint for all you aspiring writers out there: When referring in print to people of ethnicities other than your own, it’s probably not best to preface your description of their race/nationality with the word “the.” Doing so just makes you seem like 1,000-times more racist than you might normally appear. Case-in-point: Matt Hughes’ post-UFC 121 blog, in which he admits being baffled by the UFC’s choice to promote Cain Velasquez as the “First Mexican Heavyweight Champion,” but still feels happy for “The Mexicans” that Velasquez beat Brock Lesnar last weekend. Check it out:  

“I didn’t think Brock was going to lose like he did, but I knew there was a good chance Cain could get his hand raised,” Hughes writes. “UFC kind of made a big deal about it. I really don’t know why, but I’m glad that the Mexicans have a heavyweight champion.”

Emphasis ours, of course. But, see what we mean? There’s just something about the above sentence that makes the author sound like an old man in plaid pants peering hesitantly out from behind lace curtains while he complains to his wife, “Goddamn it, Margaret. What are the blacks up to now?” Nobody is accusing Matt Hughes of knowingly being culturally insensitive. Just, you know, for future reference …

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Alessio Gets Invite Back to the UFC But Had to Turn it Down Due to Contractual Obligations With United Glory


(…so I can’t accept the fight right now…Hello?….Dana…Are you there?)

Ever since John Alessio was cut lose by the WEC following a DQ loss to Brock Larson at WEC 33 in 2008, the Vancouver, BC native has been vocal about his desire to get back to fighting for the promotion. Part of the 31-year-old fighter’s motivation was the fact that, besides the loss to Larson, he had only technically lost to the promotion’s champion Carlos Condit in the WEC. He wanted the opportunity to avenge the loss and also because he had won three in a row prior to his final bout and didn’t think his firing was justified.

When the WEC dropped its welterweight class in 2009, Alessio turned his sights on the organization’s big brother promotion, the UFC, where he first fought in 2006.

Racking up an impressive 8-2 (all finishes) record and current  six-fight winning streak since being dropped by the WEC, Alessio (30-13) revealed today that he finally got his wish, but had to turn down the offer by the UFC to fight on the upcoming Montreal card in December due to contractual obligations to the Dutch-based United Glory promotion. "The Natural" earned a berth in the second round of the Golden Glory-owned organization’s $150,000 welterweight tournament which will take place on January 30 by submitting Sergey Golyaev October 16 in Amsterdam. He will face Golden Glory standout Siyar Bahadurzada in round two of the competition.

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Shane Carwin Bows Out of UFC 125 Bout With Roy Nelson Due to Nagging Back Injury


(Carwin in less painful times, leading the crowd in a spirited rendition of "YMCA.")

UFC heavyweight contender Shane Carwin announced today via his website that he will be puling out of his planned UFC 125 bout on January 1 against Roy Nelson to rehab a nagging back injury that could require surgery.

Here’s what Carwin had to say about the situation:

"I am going to pull out of the fight with Roy Nelson. As many of you know I have been having some back pain. I had an MRI yesterday and I have some damage that may really require surgery. If the doctors do not have to perform surgery then I will be out 8-12 weeks. If they do have to perform surgery I do not know how long I will be out of action.
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Dana White Is the 32nd Most Influential Man in the World

Harry Reid Dana White UFC
(Kingmaker. Lip-licker.)

…at least according to our friends at AskMen who released their Top 49 Most Influential Men of 2010 list today. Although the UFC president placed a lot higher last yearWhite’s #32 ranking puts him ahead of such notable males as Justin Timberlake (#33) and Kobe Bryant (#45). Unfortunately, he’s still two spots behind the freaking Old Spice Dude.

To determine the rankings, over 500,000 votes were cast by AskMen readers, who were asked to decide "which male figures have made the biggest impact, and ultimately, shaped what it means to be a modern man in 2010." Of course, when you leave this sort of thing up to popular vote, the results always wind up a little disassociated from logic. For example, President Barack Obama is only the 21st most influential man this year (down from #3 last year). James Franco is #7. Sure. Why not.

To see this year’s full "Influential Men" list and find out who ended up at #1, click here.

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Now That the UFC Has Their Mexican Heavyweight Champ, What Else Do They Need?

Cain Velasquez Mexico Mexican flag UFC
(You like it? I’m having this airbrushed onto the hood of my Impala.)

As you’re all aware by now, Cain Velasquez became The First Mexican Heavyweight Champion in Fighting History™ on Saturday when he destroyed Brock Lesnar at UFC 121. The crowning of Velasquez should hopefully usher in a new wave of interest in the UFC from the Latino community — but the promotion still has a long way to go until it appeals to all demographics. If the UFC wants to achieve true mass appeal, they should work as hard as possible to check these categories off their list as well…

An African-American Lightweight Champion
Over the years, the UFC has awarded title belts to Maurice Smith and Kevin Randleman in the heavyweight division, and Quinton Jackson and Rashad Evans at 205. And even though former welterweight champ Carlos Newton and middleweight king Anderson Silva aren’t American, they would certainly be described by my mother as "people of soul." But the history of the UFC’s lightweight division has been that of white dudes (see: Pulver, Sherk, Edgar) and a fiery Hawaiian warrior (come on, son.) What the division needs is an athletic and explosive champion at 155, who can serve as a role model for kids who are too short to make the basketball team. Do I have to spell it out for you? Okay, fine: A-N-T-O-N-I-O M-c-K-E-E, P-L-A-Y-E-R.

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Lorenzo Fertitta Says the UFC Might Do St-Pierre-Silva Next Summer


("We have ways to make the infidels…er…fighters agree to our demands.")

It looks like a GSP vs. Anderson Silva match-up might be closer than anticipated.

Dana White brushed off the potential blockbuster bout this summer as being something that likely won’t happen for a while, but according to his partner, UFC CEO Lorenzo Fertitta, the fight may happen as early as next summer if both fighters continue to dominate in their respective divisions.

"I want to see that fight," Fertitta said during a Q&A session in London ahead of UFC 120. "That’s probably the one fight I really want to see the most."

For that to happen, Silva will have to get by former UFC light heavyweight champion Vitor Belfort in February and St-Pierre faces fellow TUF 12 coach and MMA superheel Josh Koscheck in December. White has also held steadfast to his assertion that Jake Shields will face the winner of that bout, so it may still be a while off if he gets his way.

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