sloths funny photos album covers
Iconic Album Covers Replaced With Sloths

March, 2011

War Machine’s Big House Blogs are Back and Apparently He Doesn’t like African Americans, Cell Mates or Christians

(If Oleg couldn’t help a troubled youth, you knew they were too far gone to be helped.)

If you’ve been sitting on pins and needles waiting to hear what zany exploits War Machine has been getting into in county jail,  your wait is over.

Apparently the friend who was relaying War’s ramblings via his Twitter account is somewhat technically retarded since he couldn’t figure out how to post the blogs without using Twitlonger and the situation had him more baffled than Thiago Silva’s urologist.

Well, the dude figured out how to create a blog to post the entries, but someone forgot to tell him you don’t have to make a blog site for each entry you make. Seriously. Instead of simply calling the blog something that makes sense like War Machine’s Blog and just posting each entry on it, he named one of his blogs he made Week 18 and the other one Week 19. We can understand how he became with the fighter formerly known as Jon Koppenhaver since they both seem to be intellectual equals.

Anyway, we’re just happy to know that Machine didn’t stop writing because he was a victim of some auto-asphyxiation accident involving a grilled cheese sandwich.

Check out WM’s two latest entries after the jump.

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Eddie Alvarez Issues Obligatory Criticism of UFC Fighters

(“Next!” Pic: Bellator)

And then there was one. It’s been almost three weeks since the news broke that Zuffa, LLC. had purchased Strikeforce – this week Our Octagon Overlords allegedly began signing SF fighters to their own airtight contractual arrangements – and it just now dawns on us what this means for Eddie Alvarez. Put simply, the continued Dana-fication of the MMA landscape means Alvarez is the only US-based 155-pound fighter anywhere near the Top 10 (or, hell, Top 20) not currently owned in a roundabout way by Big DW and the Fertitta Bros. God, that must be lonely.

As if on cue, and just a few days before he’s set to put his Bellator title on the line against tournament winner Pat Curran at an event we all keep forgetting about, Alvarez made some fairly stock claims this week to SI.com’s Jeff Waggenheim about how a lot of UFC lightweights would be “nobodies” without the promotion’s PR muscle behind them. Boy, we’ve heard this one before, right?

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The Reem 2 Episode 2: The Tournament Begins

(Video courtesy of Vimeo/TheReem)

The Reem is back with another episode of our favorite web documentary series and it was worth the wait.

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MMA Injury of the Day: Mike Kyle Out of Mousasi Fight at ‘Strikeforce: Diaz vs. Daley’

Mike Kyle Strikeforce MMA photos
(Yeah, now that you mention it, you never see Mike Kyle and Newark mayor Cory Booker in the same room together…)

Due to a broken hand suffered in training, Strikeforce light-heavyweight contender Mike Kyle has been forced to withdraw from his scheduled match against Gegard Mousasi at ‘Strikeforce: Diaz vs. Daley‘ (April 9th, San Diego). The Kyle/Mousasi match would have likely produced the next challenger to Dan Henderson’s 205-pound title. Strikeforce is currently looking for a replacement opponent for Mousasi, who has scored wins over Jake O’Brien and Tatsuya Mizuno while competing in DREAM since losing the Strikeforce light-heavyweight title to Muhammed “King Mo” Lawal last April.

The news of Kyle’s injury withdrawal comes just a day after we learned that Jon Fitch — who trains alongside Kyle at American Kickboxing Academy — would not be making his rematch date with BJ Penn because of a shoulder injury. Speaking of which, Carlos Condit is down to step in against BJ Penn…as soon as the UFC asks him to.

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‘Free CagePotato’: Twitter/Facebook T-Shirt Winners, Round 2

Free CagePotato sign UFC MMA WWE Raw
(Mike V., representing at WWE Raw)

Yeeeaaaaahhh buddy! Time to give away some more Free CagePotato t-shirts to those of you who posted “Free CagePotato” signs on our Facebook wall, or sent a unique and persuasive tweet @danawhite with the #freecagepotato tag. If we ran your photo or tweet this week, please e-mail your name, shirt-size, and address to contest@cagepotato.com, and we’ll hook you up…as soon as the shirts come in. (Be patient, guys.) Thanks for the support, and please continue to submit your entries for a chance to be recognized next week. More good stuff after the jump…

Free CagePotato Jake Shields belts shirts MMA
(Mike S., doing his Jake Shields impression. Damn, how’d you get all those Hall of Fame shirts?)

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Ryan Jimmo’s ‘Big Deal Blog’ Number 2.2: Change of Plans

(Anyone can play XBox. Real fighters play chess.)

Well, another week has passed and a lot has changed.

First of all, I decided to not compete in the wrestling nationals. It was a tough decision that I didn’t come to easily. I had a lot of close friends, family and teammates come to me with concern over me competing and potentially injuring myself prior to my fight. As much as I wanted to compete, I had to listen to other people’s objective opinion. I was very attached emotionally to competing in nationals and was not seeing (or choosing to ignore) evidence that is was not perhaps the wisest move for me two weeks before a title defense. I know I always respect people more when they can be smart enough to pull themselves away form a problem and see someone’s opinion and viewpoint from a non-subjective stance. I think I could have placed in the top 3 but would of been happy with 5th place. Next year maybe.

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Five Mistakes Coach Brock Lesnar Made on the ‘TUF 13′ Season Premiere

(Coaching gaffes aside, the green jersey really brings out his eyes. Pic: TheMMANews)

At least one thing was abundantly clear Wednesday night about the debut episode of “The Ultimate Fighter,” season 13: Brock Lesnar has obviously never seen this show before. Forget for a minute all the silly squabbling over the former heavyweight champ’s credentials as a coach and whether or not his inclusion on the UFC’s popular reality show will be good for ratings and/or the sport. The real question this morning is whether or not Lesnar even owns a television, because the dude played the “TUF 13” season premiere like a straight-up rookie. Things snowballed so quickly and decisively in the favor of Team Dos Santos, that by the end of the first 60 minutes we had to wonder if this season will be another one-sided ass-kicking on the order of those handed out by Team GSP on “TUF 12” and Team Rashad on “TUF 10.”

We don’t want to totally bury Team Lesnar this early on because – let’s face it – a lot can happen between now and the end of the season, especially since producers appear to have done an uncharacteristically good job making the actual cast of “TUF 13” look evenly matched. There are only two dudes on board we’ve ever heard of before – Shamar Bailey and Ryan McGillivray, both snapped up quick-fast by Team JDS – so maybe Brock’s picks will surprise us. Still, we couldn’t help but notice that Lesnar didn’t exactly pin episode one to the mat and give it a Heath Herring-style beatdown. Here are the multiple ways Coach Brock screwed things up …

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Report: Zuffa Not Intent On Signing Fedor to the UFC

(Apparently the tipping point in negotiations was Fedor’s refusal to try Pinkberry)

Well it looks like Dana White is sending a message to fighters whose camps think they’re bigger than the UFC.

According to a report by LifeSports.ru, which cites “a source close to the fighter,” Zuffa has passed on a proposed deal with M-1 to sign the Russian management group’s biggest client, Fedor Emelianenko to a new UFC contract.

M-1′s failed dealings with the UFC over the past few years have been well documented, which no doubt left a bad taste in White’s mouth and likely contributed to the UFC president’s decision to pass on locking in the former number one ranked pound-for-pound fighter.

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Maximo Blanco: ‘My Name Is Maxi, and I’ll Do My Talking in the Octagon’

Maximo Blanco MMA fighter sengoku

By Ryan Ventura

“The Max Murderer” Maximo Blanco is a star in the world of Japanese Mixed Martial Arts. The 27-year-old Venezuelan first made his name in the world of Combat Sports as a freestyle wrestler. He won a bronze medal in the 60kg division at the 2007 Pan American games and earned a scholarship to wrestle at the college level in Japan.

After failing to qualify for the 2008 Beijing Summer Olympic games, Blanco made the jump into Mixed Martial Arts by being recruited by Sengoku, and began training at the legendary Yoshida Dojo in Japan. He became an instant star and has won over fans worldwide with his brutal and exciting brand of fighting, which has produced five knockout victories in his last six fights. Maximo Blanco was able to take some time out of his busy schedule to talk exclusively to our readers about his wrestling background, life in Japan, and career aspirations…

Continue reading on Lowkick.com/MMA

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‘TUF 13′ Episode 1 Recap: Chicken Salad, Anyone?


(Brock and the Burn Machine: Like a Shakeweight for straight dudes. Props: ZombieProphet)

The Ultimate Fighter: Team Lesnar vs. Team Dos Santos premiered last night, and whatever the opposite of fireworks is, that’s what episode 1 delivered. We begin with a video montage introducing the coaches. Brock Lesnar announces that he ain’t here to make friends during the first minute. Check that off your reality show cliche scorecard. (In an unrelated story, Junior Dos Santos later refers to himself as “a sleepy bitch.”)

The fighters come in howling like they just got selected for a spot on Mr. Awesome. They’re told that there will be no elimination fight to get into the house, which gets them even more psyched. Brock and Junior enter the room to a rousing ovation. The guys applaud Brock’s list of credentials. Dana says that Junior “stepped aside from that title shot to come in here and teach you guys what he’s got.” Obviously, they’re not going to mention Cain Velasquez’s injury and how Junior really felt about his title shot getting delayed.

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