sloths funny photos album covers
Iconic Album Covers Replaced With Sloths

January, 2012

Armchair Matchmaker: UFC 141 Edition


(Come on, Fitch wasn’t out. He was just resting his arms.)

On Friday night, Alistair Overeem successfully gut-shotted his way to a title shot against reigning UFC heavyweight champ Junior Dos Santos — and his larger-than-life opponent Brock Lesnar will likely never set foot inside of an Octagon again. But the fates of the other winners and losers from UFC 141 are still up in the air. So let’s put on our Joe Silva skin-suit and see if we can make some thoughtful matchmaking suggestions for these guys, shall we?

Nate Diaz: As ferocious as he looked against Donald Cerrone, part of me thinks that Nate is going to get rudely decisioned as soon as he goes back to facing wrestlers; guys like Clay Guida, Joe Stevenson, and Gray Maynard have already proved that putting Diaz on his back is his kryptonite. But I don’t want to see that happen, at least not right away. Next month’s UFC 144 event provides two compelling options for Nate’s next opponent — either the winner of the Anthony Pettis vs. Joe Lauzon scrap, or Ben Henderson if he loses his title challenge to Frankie Edgar. Either matchup would give Diaz an ideal dance partner for another guaranteed Fight of the Night.

Donald Cerrone: Not to steal the thunder from Diaz’s masterful performance, but Cerrone looked like shit on Friday. Sorry, it needed to be said. The highly technical fight-finisher that we’ve come to know and love was M.I.A., replaced by an outgunned cowpoke who was as sloppy as he was tentative. Cerrone needs a rebound fight to find his mojo again. Setting him up against fast-rising Ultimate Fighter 13 winner Tony Ferguson would be a great test for both fighters. Either Cowboy gets back on track against a solid opponent, or Ferguson continues to prove that he’s more than just a TUF-guy.

Read More DIGG THIS

Brock Told JDS That the Power of Overeem’s Kicks and Knees Threw Him Off His Game


(“Oof…right in the diverticulitis!”)

Most fans and pundits who watched Friday night’s UFC 141 main event between former UFC heavyweight champ Brock Lesnar and Octagon newcomer Alistair Overeem were amazed that Brock didn’t utilize his superior wrestling to stifle the offensive attack of “The Demolition Man.”

Junior dos Santos had a brief exchange in the cage with Lesnar following his crushing defeat at the hands (and legs) of Overeem, and according to the UFC heavyweight kingpin, his newly-retired peer was rattled by the sheer power of the former DREAM, K-1 and Strikeforce champion’s kicks and knees and couldn’t get back on track after absorbing such an immense amount of damage.

Read More DIGG THIS

CagePotato Open Discussion: Five Fights We Need to See in 2012


(Can someone say SUPERFIGHT?!!!) 

It’s a new year, Potato Nation, and aside from an endless number of Mayan-themed jokes that will undoubtedly punctuate most of our content, we’ve decided to kick off 2012 with you, our esteemed followers, in mind. And while we had more than our fill of exciting brawls in 2011, things like injury curses, excessive title shots, and sudden desires for film careers left us with hunger pains that could only be satiated by the announcement of another marquee match-up. That, or one of your wife’s famous steak sandwiches.

Call us greedy, call us insensitive, but we’re the type of fans that simply must have our every fantasy fulfilled, and it is with that in mind that we ask you, our fellow fanatics, to join us in a discussion of the five fights we NEED to witness this year, if only to end a few of the never ending arguments that constitute the CP comments sections. Here are our picks…

#5 – Anderson Silva vs. Chael Sonnen
Anderson Silva Chael-Sonnen UFC 117

Why?: Because if we have to hear how lucky Silva got one more time, we are going to round up all of our writers and perform a full reenactment of Death of a (Real Estate) Salesman. Goldstein will play Willy Loman, the elderly and dillusional salesman (Obvs.). CrushCo will play Biff, the former football star who yearns for a life as a farmhand, and Seth will play Happy, the slacking womanizer, leaving none other than myself to play Linda. What can I say, it sucks being the new guy.

Read More DIGG THIS

Make Your Monday a Bit Better With the Last Episode of ‘The Bum Rush Radio Show’ of 2011

If you missed listening to the festivities live last week, we finally got around to uploading our interactive 30th episode of The Bum Rush Radio Show that we recorded on Thursday. Between audio issues and server downtime over the weekend, we were unable to bring you this dose of sweet ear candy until today, but at least you’ve got something to help you through your hangover…er Monday.

Joining us on this 2011 retrospective instalment of show were some of your favorite contributors including Jason Moles, Jared Jones and Seth Falvo. Also calling in to voice their opinions on the year’s biggest stories and UFC 141 were comment section regulars Remedial and karmaatemycat.

Read More DIGG THIS

‘UFC 141: Lesnar vs. Overeem’ GIF Party: The Finishes + Other Highlights

gina carano dancing gif ufc 141
(Thank you, Internet. You never fail us. Dancing Gina Carano GIF via MMAConvert)

UFC 141‘s best moments, boiled down to 12 animated gifs. Check out the rest after the jump. Special thanks to IronForgesIron, Chas, and Unfilter on the UG.

Read More DIGG THIS

MMA Stock Market: UFC 141 – Lesnar vs. Overeem Edition


(Hey Mario, is that some Jacks Links in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?)

By Jason Moles

When we next see Brock Lesnar, will it be in the Octagon or the squared circle? What did “Cowboy” Cerrone do with the beanie Nate Diaz handed him? Where in the world did this Jimy Hettes guy come from? None of these questions will be answered in this forum. Instead, you’ll learn which UFC 141 fighters’ stock to buy more of, sell off, or hold. Even if you’re still too hung over to remember what happened Friday night, you’ll still need to make a few fiscal moves to stay ahead of the curve. Remember, money never sleeps, kid. Now go make yourself a Bloody Mary then keep reading to kick off the New Year with sage advice about the MMA stock market.

Alistair Overeem – Buy it like they’re giving it away for free

It makes no difference whether you think “The Reem” is completely unstoppable or flat out overrated — when he fights, people watch. Casual fans will be enamored with Alistair Overeem because he looks good with his shirt off (at least that’s why I think Arianny make that face) and the hype that can be drummed up by Zuffa thanks to his Strikeforce, DREAM, and K1 titles. For the next few years, as long as he doesn’t piss hot for some tainted horsemeat, the “Demolition Man” will be a main event attraction that will only make him more valuable with time.

Read More DIGG THIS

The Rearview Mirror: Five MMA Trends We Hope To Have Left Behind In 2011

“Listen, I know we’ve had our moments, but before you make your list just hear me out…” (Photo: Gossiboocrew.com)

We’re only a few hours into the new year, but unless your head hit the pillow just as the ball dropped, you’ve probably already carried some of your bad habits with you into 2012. We are creatures of habit, and change doesn’t come naturally to us. If it did, we wouldn’t make such a big production out of our ‘New Year’s Resolutions’. The sport of mixed martial arts and its fans are no different. Here’s a quick look at some of the bad habits we’ve picked up and poor decisions we’ve made over the past 12-months. Let’s hope we can leave them behind in yesteryear.

Read More DIGG THIS

Houston Alexander catches son Talking Dirty, Challenges him to Boxing Match, gets Arrested


“Back up, homie: What the hell is ‘Face Book’?”

As MMA fans, we’ve seen our fair share of “WTF” moments. From freak show fights to flashy knockouts to Jon Fitch partying like a rockstar to freaking Jose Canseco, you would think that we’ve seen it all and nothing could surprise us. Yet sometimes a story comes along that is so bizarre that even we are unable to make sense of it.

Houston Alexander returned to the spotlight this weekend. When we last checked in on the former UFC light heavyweight, he was getting his lights turned out by ex-hockey enforcer Steve Bosse. If you thought that was as low as things could get for Alexander, then prepare to flabbergasted.

Here is the latest update on Alexander, courtesy of KMTV News Omaha, via MiddleEasy:

Read More DIGG THIS

Video: By the way, Kimbo Slice is now 3-0 as a Professional Boxer


Kimbo, looking like Rick Ross with slightly better cardio

You know, I can’t help but feel like I’ve seen this happen before.

While you were busy watching UFC 141, Kimbo Slice looked to improve his professional boxing record to 3-0 at the Buffalo Run Casino in Miami, Oklahoma. So far in his boxing career, the Shaws have been feeding Kimbo cans with losing records, and Kimbo has been capitalizing in devastating fashion. Friday night, however, Kimbo Slice was given his toughest test in his young boxing career in Charles Hackmann, a fitness instructor making his professional boxing debut after taking the bout on just one day’s notice.

It’s almost like the guy was brought in to lose *snickers*, yet he held his own against the former UFC fighter (sigh), almost pulling off the upset in the second round. The action wasn’t as fast-paced as Cruz vs. Johnson, yet you wouldn’t know it by how badly both fighters gassed in the third and fourth rounds. When it was all said and done, Kimbo improved to 3-0, yet had major holes in his game exposed.

Video, courtesy of Iron forges Iron, after the jump.

Read More DIGG THIS
CagePotatoMMA