sloths funny photos album covers
Iconic Album Covers Replaced With Sloths

February, 2012

Marius Zaromskis Signs With Bellator; Won’t Be a Part of Season 6 Tournament


(Ben Askren is the disease. And the Whitemare is the cure.)

From somersault knockout kicks to ill-advised backflipping guard-pass attempts, Marius Zaromskis has developed a high-risk, high-insanity MMA style that’s all his own. And though a 2010 stint in Strikeforce went terribly — with TKO losses against Nick Diaz and Evangelista Santos, and a depressing 6-second no-contest against Waachim Spiritwolf — the Lithuanian striker is preparing to give it another go for a rival American promotion.

MMAFighting.com breaks the news that Zaromskis has signed with Bellator, and will make his debut this year in the later part of their sixth season. Though he would have made an excellent replacement for War Machine, Zaromskis will not be a part of the welterweight tournament. We’ll update you when we know more about his promotional debut date and first opponent.

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Brian Stann Puts Michael Bisping on Notice


(Seconds after becoming the world’s first active-duty UFC Champion, Brian Stann happened to witness a gang of streetwise thugs kidnapping WWE superstar John Cena’s wife. And now he won’t stop until until the streets…are safe again. Brian Stann IS The Marine 2: The Actual Marine .)

We’re not going to suggest that Brian Stann might be looking past his upcoming UFC on FUEL TV 2 bout with Italian striker Alessio Sakara, because here at CP, we don’t just jump to conclusions. But granted Stann is successful come April 14th, he already has his next opponent in mind. And believe it or not, it’s Michael Bisping. When asked on the subject of dream opponents by EsNewsReporting, Stann was quick to reply:

Michael Bisping. I wouldn’t try to do anything but walk straight through him with a right hand. Here’s the deal: I don’t know Michael personally, sometimes I think he gets a bum rap and I’ve learned not to judge people off the media and things of that nature. After my last fight he had a few comments about my technique and who I was as a fighter that I thought were a little odd. He called me a ‘white belt’ and said that I was ‘exposed’ so I’d love to see him put his money where his mouth is. We can fight and we can solve that. He may be a great guy, I don’t know, and maybe he is, but I would just like to compete against him since he made those comments. 

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This Clip of Joe Rogan Impersonating Lenne Hardt is the Best Thing You’ll See Today

Joe Rogan debuted his new recurring segment on Fuel’s Ultimate Insider show this week and it was pretty good. For the first episode, Joe looked back on what made PRIDE awesome. The standout moment had to be his wild-eyed impersonation of former PRIDE announcer Lenne Hardt.

The GIFS are great, but the clip after the jump is even better.

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Dana White’s UFC 144 Video Blog Number Two From the Land of the Rising Sun

tk
(“TRX is a workout thingy? I thought it was a rap group.”)

In spite of the fact that it was mostly made up of clips from this week’s pre-fight presser, Dana’s second UFC 144 vlog was pretty entertaining.

Check out the highlights and the video after the jump if your boss blocked YouTube at work. What is this, 1984?

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[PHOTO] The Future Heavyweight Overlord of the Universe Has Arrived


(If you think about it, a giraffe is nothing more than a horse with a really, really long neck. Watch your back Olivier.) 

No, this is not one of MRuss’ award winning photoshops, although we imagine everyone in the UFC’s heavyweight division wishes it was. It turns out that this beanstalkian figure is Olivier Richter, otherwise known as the tallest man in Holland. He stands at 7’2, or three inches taller than Stefan “Skyscraper” Struve, and according to Alistair Overeem, has already begun to train kickboxing and weight lifting with the hopes of one day making it into the UFC.

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UFC Flyweight Tournament Fights Could Feature Sudden-Victory Fourth Round


(Get ready for 20 minutes of fun-sized beast-mode.)

Next weekend in Sydney, Australia, the UFC will debut their brand-new 125-pound flyweight division with a pair of fights on the main card of UFC on FX: Alves vs. Kampmann; the winners will later meet to determine the first-ever UFC flyweight champion. And because a winner must be determined in each semi-final match, the UFC is considering an unprecedented solution. As Demetrious Johnson explained to Crooklyn:

I don’t know if anybody has said anything about it, and this is the first time I’m mentioning it, is that we (Ian McCall and himself) had to sign for a ‘sudden death’ bout. If it goes to three rounds, and the judges can’t decide who the winner is, then we’ll do a fourth round…I can’t say if it’s going to be for Joseph (Benavides) and Yasuhiro (Urushitani), because I’m not gonna say that the UFC made those guys sign, too. I’m telling you, specifically, that I signed a contract for an extra round on the bout agreement. I’m not gonna say that they did. [But] I’m assuming, in my unprofessional opinion, that they did as well.”

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MMA Yearbook Photo of the Day: Most Likely to Lick Your Blood

BJ Penn yearbook photo UFC MMA photos

When you see it, you’ll shit poi. Props: Reddit MMA.

Related:
- Couture and Cozad: True Players
- God Made Two of ‘Em

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On This Day in MMA History: Zuffa Promotes First UFC Event, Pulver Becomes a UFC Champ and Tito Gets the Only KO of His Career


(Damn, graphic design has come a long way in 11 years.)

On this day in MMA history 11 years ago, Zuffa LLC, the Las Vegas-based owners of the UFC took its newly-purchased traveling spectacle on the road for the first time to Atlantic City for UFC 30: Battle on the Boardwalk. The card featured five of the promotion’s present and future titleholders and was one of the better events in recent UFC history (at the time).

The main event of the night featured a middleweight (which would be later named the light-heavyweight division) championship bout between then-champ Tito Ortiz and the late Evan Tanner. Unfortunately for fans who were expecting a drag-out war between the pair, the fighter formerly known as “The Huntington Beach Badboy” had other plans. After a brief feeling out process, Ortiz scooped Tanner up, slamming the Team Quest fighter on his back and knocking him unconscious, adding a couple of stiff punches on the ground for good measure. The knockout would stand as the only one of Ortiz’s career.

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Quote of the Day: Melvin Guillard is “Praying” for a Joe Lauzon Rematch

Joe Lauzon Melvin Guillard UFC 136
(Come to think of it, we’d watch this again.) 

Perhaps Melvin Guillard has made some DRASTIC improvements to his ground game since joining up with the Blackzilians, or perhaps he simply has some sort of autoerotic asphyxiation fetish, because the hard hitting lightweight recently told MMA Weekly that he wants his next fight to be a rematch against Joe Lauzon, whom you may recall, dropped Guillard and finished him with a rear-naked choke in just under 50 seconds of their UFC 136 bout. According to Guillard, the loss is the only in his career that he felt he truly should have won. Here’s what “The Young Assassin” had to say:

In the 10 losses I have in my MMA career, I haven’t rematched anyone I’ve lost to. Not once, I’ve never really cared for rematches because I felt they won, now I’ll move on. Right now, I’m at the point where this fight means something to me, I have something to prove against Joe Lauzon, so this is a rematch I’m asking for. Right now, I’m looking to watch the fights in Japan and I’m praying that he loses to (Anthony) Pettis because I want a rematch against Joe Lauzon. I don’t want to fight nobody next but Joe Lauzon. I don’t even care how it goes, I just want to see Pettis win and I want an immediate rematch with Joe Lauzon. Hopefully, I can get that rematch by fourth of July in Vegas.

Join us after the jump for a few more interesting musings from Guillard’s interview.

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Must-See: A Night in Tokyo With Rampage Jackson

There’s a lot to like about this new 45-minute video feature from MMAFighting.com. First of all, it’s nice to see that Quinton Jackson and Ariel Helwani have squashed their beef. Also, it’s nice to see Rampage out in public in Japan without humiliating the locals.

So here we have Quinton and Ariel on the streets of Tokyo four days before UFC 144, walking and talking, and walking and talking, and walking and talking until they finally arrive at an arcade to play Tekken Tag. Along the way, they discuss Rampage’s first trip to Japan fighting Kazushi Sakuraba, the different kind of racism in Japan, the unmatched atmosphere of PRIDE in its heyday, how a person’s personality is determined by their blood type, fight fixing, his betrayal by you-know-who and subsequent reckless driving arrest. Then they walk some more, and Quinton talks about parenting, matchmaking, his greatest career triumph, privacy, retirement, and how he won’t be fully appreciated until he’s gone.

It’s probably the most in-depth interview with Rampage you’ll ever see. Give it a look.

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