sloths funny photos album covers
Iconic Album Covers Replaced With Sloths

April, 2012

53-Year-Old Man Fights on One-Hour Notice, Kicks Youngster’s Ass [VIDEO]


Battle Of The Ages – Watch More Funny Videos
(Props: Wargo205 via ProMMANow)

It doesn’t matter how fancy things get at the top of the sport — MMA’s regional scene is still a chaotic mess where literally anything can happen. Case in point: At Fire Extreme Fighting’s show at the Kankakee Fair Grounds in Illinois on Saturday night, a 53-year-old spectator named Tim was asked if he’d come in as a replacement for a fighter who had dropped out at the last minute. Being in fair shape for his age, and open to new experiences, Tim agreed, and found himself staring down a 21-year-old opponent just an hour later.

You can check out the video above. When the dust settles on this one-round slobberknocker, Tim has won by TKO and we find out that the enthusiastic camera-person is none other than Stephan Bonnar. “You’re my hero! That was awesome!” Bonnar tells Tim, who’s a little too winded to walk us through the replay.

As for the 21-year-old who was left unconscious in a planked position? Details on him are scarce, but it’s very likely he didn’t get laid that night.

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UFC Lightweights Clay Guida and Mark Bocek Are Not on the Same Side of This Whole TRT/Alistair Overeem Debate

Clay Guida beer bong Lake Havasu funny MMA photos UFC
(In a rare misstep for Guida, he had no idea that the beer bong he was offered actually contained Four Loko. There were no survivors.) 

It seems that you can’t come across an MMA interview these days that doesn’t bring up the Alistair Overeem situation. The phrase “testosterone replacement therapy” has been thrown around in more MMA blogs within the past month than the name “Tim Tebow” on your average Sportscenter episode, and that’s saying something. Is it a coincidence that both phrases emphasize the “T” sound? We think not.

Being the laid back, no worries, Winnebago-loving kind of guy that Clay Guida is, he was much more willing to forgive Overeem when speaking to MMAWeekly about the situation yesterday, believing that a lot of the blame should be placed on that of his coaches. And in case you’re wondering, he managed to relate the situation to the lion-esque mange that sits atop his head:

Yeah, Alistair not knowing that there is testosterone in his vitamins, is like me not knowing what kind of conditioner I’m putting in my hair. I’m not going to put the complete blame on him, I’m going to put it on his coaches, and, maybe not his team necessarily, but his trainer and this and that and whoever maybe slipped him a Mickey or whatever you want to call it. I’m a fan of the guy, don’t get me wrong, but, I think they had plans elsewhere or whatever it may be, but, it’s a bummer that the main event in one of the biggest cards of the year is going to be kind of tampered with, just because you know, they got careless and maybe they didn’t have all the belief in themselves, so. I just stick with my regular stuff. The fruits and vegetables, fish oils, glucose and stuff like that you know? I’ve never been big on supplements on stuff like that you know? I just take natural stuff.

Fish oil, eh? And here we thought he was drinking whiskey shooters and vodka cranberries this whole time.

It turns out that fellow lightweight contender Mark Bocek, ever the stickler, was not too pleased that Overeem received only 9 months for his botched surprise drug test, going as far as to say that any fighter needing TRT (or marijuana for that matter), shouldn’t be fighting in the first place:

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Knockout(s) of the Day: Paul Calland’s Spinning Backfist Destruction of Lewis Bailey, Johnson/Beltran & Barry/Morecraft Fights Released Online


(Props to IronForgesIron for the vid.) 

Yesterday, UK based promotion X-treme Combat held its sixth mixed combat event in Cumbria, North West England. Featuring amateur boxing, semi-pro boxing, and kickboxing matches, the evening was highlighted by a K1-style rules bout between FlexMMA product Lewis Bailey and Salfrod MMA’s Paul Calland. Held in an octagon that can only be described as “replica size” with two of the most eager ringside announcers in recent memory calling the action, the scrap featured several back and forth exchanges in its brief duration.

After whiffing a head kick around the 2:40 mark, Calland decides to turn a turd into gold by unleashing a wild spinning backfist as a follow up. A backfist so wild, in fact, that it wasn’t really a spinning backfist at all, but more of a sloppy, unintentional spinning elbow ala Jon Jones. In either case, it catches Bailey completely off guard, rendering him unconscious before he can even fall to the canvas like a rapidly deflating balloon. Now, our Pikey may be a little rusty, but we believe one of the announcers referred to the shot as “a poop,” which references the fact that Bailey likely shit himself after being hit with such a powerful blow.

And while we’re discussing all things KO-related, we’ve got to give some props to FUEL TV, who recently released full, crystal clear videos of the Lavar Johnson/Joey Beltran and Pat Barry/Christian Morecraft scraps from January’s UFC on FX: Guillard vs. Miller card to hype up Barry and Johnson’s upcoming clash at UFC on FOX 3. Both were exciting brawls to say the least, and both ended by way of violent KO, so check them out after the jump.

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Mauricio “Shogun” Rua vs. Thiago Silva Likely for UFC 149; Aldo vs. Koch Slated for Main Event


(Rua slugs Dan Henderson during their epic bout in November. / Photo courtesy of Heavy)

A matchup between Mauricio “Shogun” Rua and Thiago Silva is likely for July 21st’s UFC 149 event in Calgary, according to a new report on MMA Junkie. UFC president Dana White tweeted yesterday that the two light-heavyweight strikers would face one another, but didn’t confirm the date or venue.

Silva is coming off of a one-year suspension and a decision loss to Alexander Gustafsson. Winless since his 2009 knockout of Keith Jardine, Silva’s contract may very well be on the line here. Shogun’s last bout, a five-round war/decision loss to Dan Henderson, was widely considered to be the greatest fight in MMA history until this past weekend.

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UFC on FOX 3 Exclusive: Danny Castillo Talks TRT, The WEC, And His Upcoming Fight With John Cholish


(You see, Shamar, MMA is a lot like dodgeball – the fat guys always get knocked out first.) 

By Jared Jones

After the WEC merged with the UFC in early 2011, most MMA fans were quick to write off the competitors in its lightweight division, claiming that they would simply be outmatched by their UFC counterparts. The success of current lightweight champ Ben Henderson, along with that of guys like Donald Cerrone and Anthony Pettis quickly disproved this notion, but one fighter who has gone almost completely unnoticed at 155 has been that of Danny Castillo. The Team Alpha Male standout’s record currently stands at 3-1 in the UFC, including a win over former number one contender Joe Stevenson in his promotional debut. On the heels of a split decision victory over noted striker Anthony Njokuani at UFC 141 in December, Castillo will be looking to build on his current two-fight win streak against Strikeforce veteran and submission savant John Cholish on the preliminary card of next weekend’s UFC on FOX 3 event. We were recently able to snag an interview with “Last Call,” who dished on everything from TRT to his stance on teammates fighting teammates. Enjoy, and make sure to follow Danny and all his Alpha Male cohorts on Twitter.

CAGEPOTATO.COM: Thanks for interview opportunity, Danny. I was wondering if we could first talk about your UFC 141 victory over Anthony Njokuani. How would you assess your performance in that fight?

Danny Castillo: “I would rate my performance about a D+. It wasn’t the best fight of my career. I was able to get a victory on four weeks of training, and I had just fought prior to that in November against Shamar Bailey. I pretty much went in there with the gameplan to wrestle the whole time; I knew that that was one of the flaws in [Njokuani's] game. He’s a dangerous fighter. He was one of the most exciting fighters in the WEC, and he’s probably one of the top five strikers inside the UFC. On four weeks notice, I wasn’t prepared to necessarily stand with him or to sit in the pocket against his strengths. His ground game was greatly improved, and now that I’ve done some training with him I understand why; he’s got a phenomenal Jiu-Jitsu coach in Sergio Penha. As far as I’m concerned, I think I won the first and the third round. I probably had about six takedowns throughout the fight, and I think I did enough to win the fight.”

Follow us after the jump for Castillo’s thoughts on the TRT debate, the possibility of fighting a teammate, and more. 

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Robert Burneika’s MMA Debut Was Even Shittier Than Expected [VIDEO]


(Damn. Even Tank Abbott is embarrassed by that garbage.)

You may recall Robert Burneika, the Lithuanian strongman who had been preparing for his MMA debut mostly by high-kicking watermelons. Becoming the next Mariusz Pudzianowski is a questionable goal to shoot for, but Burneika took the first step Friday night at MMA ATTACK 2 in Katowice, Poland, by scoring a second-round stoppage over Polish tomato can Marcin Najman, who also happened to be Pudz’s first MMA victim. We kept our expectations low for this matchup, and the fight still fell short, for two main reasons:

- The way Burneika lunges forward with those front kicks suggests that he may not have had a legit Muay Thai coach in his camp.

- Najman spent the entire fight running in circles to avoid engaging, which gave the match an unfortunate Kimbo/Houston vibe. In five-and-a-half minutes of fight time, Najman threw less than ten strikes. I think it’s safe to say that he respected Burneika’s power a little too much.

If you want to get a look at the future of Polish freak-show fighting, check out the full video after the jump. 3:57-4:11 is pure slapstick.

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Hector Lombard Draws Brian Stann for UFC Debut, Requests a Random Drug Test for Some Reason


(“Oh no, I wasn’t laughing at you. I was just remembering this funny joke I heard about a guy who got punched in the head really hard.”)

The UFC has confirmed that their new middleweight signee Hector Lombard — best known as Bellator’s Angel of Death — will be making his first Octagon appearance against Brian Stann. UFC.com reports that the matchup will take place this August in Los Angeles, suggesting that it will go down at UFC on FOX 4.

Known for his inhuman power and massive physique, Lombard took to twitter last night to make a rather unique request: “Can we make a random drug test before my fight???” Lombard clearly wants to prove that his muscles are all natural — though once you request a random test, it’s not exactly random anymore. Ah well, he’ll get the hang of it.

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[Fight Videos] Invicta FC 1: Inaugural Event Shows Broad Appeal

(Leslie Smith vs Kaitlin Young, via IronForgesIron.com)

Invicta FC 1 wasn’t the first promotion to feature an all-female fight card, nor did they invent the MMA livestream, but last night they paired the two beautifully for a groundbreaking show that will undoubtedly do wonders for WMMA. The online broadcast is said to have peaked at 100k viewers, some four-times their initial projection.

Overall the show had a professional, polished appearance. The familiar voice of Mauro Renallo carried the commentary team with the sort of obvious, gender-based puns that we would never personally sink t…oh, right. The recently unemployed “King Mo” kept it 100 on the mic, but casual doesn’t always equal comfortable or competent, and Jon Anik can breath a little easier this morning. Alongside Lawal, Julie Kedzie called the fight from a fighter’s perspective, and with a little more experience she could transition well into that roll.

While one of Invicta’s stated goals is to develop clearly defined weight classes, the fighters will have to do their part when it’s time to step on the scales. With four fighters missing weight for the inaugural event, some of them badly, there’s still much work to be done.

As for the fights, it was an overall entertaining card. Videos and a recap are after the jump.

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Satire Sunday: Spuds McKenzie Guilty of Sexual Harassment, Sentenced to Nine Months Probation

DISCLAIMER: This feature is purely a satirical piece- you know, like the title explicitly states. Any references to real people and events are purely for comedic effect. Nothing you are about to read is actual news, and no quotes used in this article are authentic quotes. In short, don’t take anything you are about to read as a real news story.

Anheuser-Busch respects women, and would never support sexism in any way.

The family-friendly Anheuser-Busch corporation has just been turned upside down. Former Bud Light mascot Spuds MacKenzie has been found guilty in the state of Nevada of sexually harassing multiple women while employed by Anheuser-Busch. Furthermore, Anheuser-Busch is being investigated for its role in MacKenzie’s crimes, as victims say that the harassment was not only encouraged by fellow employees, but that the victims were vehemently discouraged from filing complaints while they were employed by the company.

The charges against MacKenzie read like the sex-depraved fantasies of a thirteen year old boy. Among them include the complaints of Carol Grey, who played the role of “Hot Blond Chick” in many Bud Light commercials. Grey revealed that MacKenzie would repeatedly order her to smack him on the ass during commercial shoots, as well as force her to publically praise MacKenzie’s sexual conquests on numerous occasions.

Shocking videos of the harassment available after the jump.

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TUF 15 Live Episode Eight Recap

By Elias Cepeda

If Team Cruz’ Sam Sicilia was freaking out over the pressure of being a #2 pick, it may have intensified this week as he was set to face the last pick overall, Chris Saunders. At least Sam had an extra world champion along to help him prepare.

Dominick Cruz brought in Strikeforce 135 pound champion Ronda Rousey to the UFC training center to teach his team some of her devastating Judo techniques. Ronda admits to being nervous about going in to teach the guys but they all seem receptive, as they should be, to learning from the champ – even though she’s a girl.

Oh yeah, Chris Tickle says that Ronda damn near broke his ribs while demonstrating a throw on him. The chick is rough, for sure.

Dana White allows the fighters to watch Jon Jones vs. Rashad Evans at the TUF mansion and Ronda joins them. Once more, her nervousness proves unfounded.

“There are going to be a lot of guys to fend off at once,” she laughs while being hot.

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