Props: Twitter.com/chadmendes

By George Shunick

When Chad Mendes was first accused of sucker punching a patron at a California bar during a brawl and fleeing from the cops, he dismissed the accuracy of the charges against him and stated he would cooperate fully with the investigation. In retrospect, that turned out to be a bad idea. Mendes was charged with battery yesterday, facing up to a $2,000 fine and 6 months in jail.

For those of you who missed this the first time, or have the memory span of a goldfish, here’s the official recap of what happened:

“Kings County Sheriff’s deputies say Mendes, a 27-year-old local native, sucker punched a man in the face at the Lacey Inn Bar on July 29. Leaving out the back door, he ran from law enforcement and managed to escape capture. But witnesses at the scene recognized the famous athlete. [Author’s note: people recognized “famous athlete” Chad Mendes!? MMA is finally mainstream!]

Deputies initially stopped at the bar around 1:18 a.m. in response to a call about two people fighting in the parking lot. After they pulled the men apart, about 40 more people decided to join in, turning it into a large brawl.

With Vitor Belfort now set to fight Jon Jones at UFC 152, Alan Belcher was left without an opponent for UFC 153 in Rio. Many of us began to speculate as to who the UFC would call in to replace Vitor Belfort in a fight that had possible title implications. Nah, I’m just kidding, we were all way too busy talking about bitchassness, trolling your way into title shots and over-saturation to worry about Alan Belcher. Let’s get back to the real issues of today.

Not so fast. Alan Belcher released a video blog yesterday to discuss the whole Jon Jones saga. Interestingly enough, Belcher first discloses that he won’t be fighting at UFC 153 because he wants to let a back injury he suffered while training heal. In his words:

Rewind a little bit: Three or four weeks back, I had a real bad back problem. I went to the doctor, found out that I had a spinal fracture, so that put me out for three weeks. I didn’t bend my back, I just kept it straight. I’m like “I’m just going to get the rest I need to make this fight happen and push through it.” I was getting back in there training, and it took me a whole week to get my mind wrapped back around it, but I was like “This is a huge fight, I’m going to do it,” and there is no way I was going to back out of that fight. Once I started back and I got going, I put a lot of thought into it and I was going full force ahead.

“This new driver we hired came THIS close to hitting a pole on his first delivery. Where’d we find this guy, anyways?”

Looks like Chael Sonnen isn’t done with Jon Jones just yet.

Still upset over Jones’ decision to turn down a fight against him in order to save UFC 151, Chael Sonnen decided that he’d at least make some money off of the situation. See, because unlike Jon Jones, Chael Sonnen is a businessman. His pizza parlor, Mean Street Pizza, now offers “The Jon Jones Special Pizza,” presumably for a limited time only. It isn’t exactly subtle, but it may be the best case of death by chicken since Henri M’Bongo.

Behold:

By Elias Cepeda

Being proactive paid off for Joe Lauzon last week. The UFC lightweight contender signed on to fight Gray Maynard and says he was the one pushing for the tough match up.

“I saw Gray say in an interview that he wanted to coach the next season of TUF against Nate Diaz,” Joe explains.

“He’s banking on Diaz beating [Ben] Henderson [when the two face off for Henderson’s title] and wants that title shot and, I guess, a third fight between him and Nate. So I contacted [UFC matchmaker] Joe Silva and said that I thought Gray and I could be a cool angle as coaches of TUF. They didn’t do that but later I got a call asking if I wanted to fight Gray on December 29th. Its on the main card of a huge card.”

Lauzon is coming off of a record-setting submission of the night and fight of the night performance in beating Jamie Varner earlier this month. Maynard is coming off of a controversially-close split decision win over Clay Guida. Before that, Maynard fought then-champion Frankie Edgar twice in a row, first drawing with him and then losing via TKO.

Lauzon doesn’t know if a win over Maynard would put him in the #1 contender’s spot for the lightweight title for certain, but he says it would be a “step in the right direction.” “Gray is a monster. He’s only lost to Frankie. He’s super tough. Me beating Gray would make a big statement because he’s smashed everyone except for the champ at the time. Even in those fights he had the champ hurt badly at times,” Lauzon says.

The UFC may be a bit of a mess right now, but last night’s Bellator 73 wrapped up the promotion’s Summer Series with a bang. Despite an injury to Pat Curran scrapping the initial main event of Curran vs. Patricio Freire, the event soldiered on with Attila Vegh vs. Travis Wiuff for the light-heavyweight tournament championship as the new main event.

If you asked us for a prediction beforehand, we probably would have told you that Vegh is too small and one-dimensional to stop Travis Wiuff from laying on top of him for most of the fight. It wouldn’t be pretty, but it’d earn Wiuff a well-deserved rematch against Bellator light-heavyweight champion Christian M’Pumbu. Well, good thing you never asked us, because we’d feel pretty stupid right about now.

Wiuff can’t implement his trademark pit-and-quit offense before Vegh finds his head with a huge right hand. A few more follow-up punches for good measure, and Attila Vegh is now the Summer Series Light-Heavyweight Tournament Champion. Something tells me that the eventual clash between Vegh and M’Pumbu won’t last too long.

Video available after the jump.

Pictured: Their approximate reactions to finding out “garbage-ass” was a real phrase.

One week ago, Ben published an article voicing concerns over how weak UFC 151′s main card was. But it was cool, because Jon Jones vs. Dan Henderson was going to be such an awesome fight. Two days ago, Jones vs. Henderson was scrapped and UFC 151 was canceled. [Ed. note: Damn, two days? Feels like we've been covering this forever.] Even though most of us acknowledged that the cancellation of the event was at least partially due to the garbage-assness of pretty much the entire card, we were too busy talking about Jon Jones ducking Chael Sonnen/Sonnen attempting to troll his way into an immediate title shot (depending on which side of the fence you’re on) to really delve into the issue. But now that the UFC has started to transplant the canceled UFC 151 fights to other cards, it’s time to take a closer look at that issue for a moment.

The bouts from UFC 151 are quickly being rescheduled for different cards, with UFC on FX 5 taking a significant chunk of them. As we covered in yesterday’s link dump, UFC 151′s planned co-main event, Jake Ellenberger vs. Jay Hieron, will now be the co-main event of UFC On FX 5. This won’t be the only fight from UFC 151′s main card that will now be padding UFC on FX 5 – Dennis Hallman vs. Thiago Tavares, Danny Castillo vs. Michael Johnson and Shane Roller vs. Jacob Volkmann will be moved to this card as well. UFC on Fuel TV 6 will now be featuring fights between bantamweights Takeya Mizugaki and Jeff Hougland and flyweights John Lineker and Yasuhiro Urushitani, while Kyle Noke and Charlie Brenneman will do the man dance on the undercard of UFC 152.

In case you haven’t noticed, it’s worth mentioning that absolutely none of these fights – three of which were on the pay-per-view portion of UFC 151, mind you – have made it to the main card of an upcoming pay-per-view. Now I understand that financially, most fighters who were expecting a paycheck on September 1 simply can’t afford to wait until November’s UFC 154 to fight again. But that’s not the issue: The issue is that the UFC could afford to move pay-per-view quality fights *makes this hand gesture* to free television in the first place.

You may have heard that former UFC weigh-in specialist Anthony “Rumble” Johnson was set to make his debut at “RumbleWeight” last night at Titan Fighting Championship (TFC) 24 in Kansas City, Kansas. Well, he did. The former welterweight Johnson made the 205lb light heavyweight and battered Esteves Jones until he secured a 2nd round stoppage in the TFC main event.

But we were more interested in seeing how submission grappling and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu world champion Braulio Estima would do in his MMA debut, anyway – especially after Renzo Gracie told this writer yesterday when he visited him to tape an episode of the soon-coming podcast, The Conversation, that Estima had dropped over twenty pounds to make welterweight and then put it all back on for the fight. Renzo said that it was the first time Estima had ever made such a weight cut.

Besides, we hadn’t heard much from Estima since his amazing grappling match non event with Nick Diaz .

Estima is the reigning top dog in submission grappling and could conceivably stay that way for a long time. Instead, he decided to test the waters in mixed martial arts.

His first test was Chris Holland, a fighter who went into the contest with eight pro fights to Estima’s none. In the end, Estima’s lifetime of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu prevailed as he put Holland to sleep with an arm triangle choke.

(“How to Kill Zombies with Daron Cruickshank” sneak peek, via TheFightNerd. It’s like The Walking Dead, only, y’know, not like that at all.)

- A Guide to Playing a Complex Blame Game in the Wake of UFC 151′s Cancellation (MMAJunkie)

- Ellenberger vs. Hieron Moved To UFC On FX 5 Co-Main Slot (HeavyMMA)

- Jon Jones Installed As Massive Favorite in UFC 152 Opening Line vs. Vitor Belfort (MMAFighting)

- The Jon Jones Photoshop Gallery of Hate (TitoCouture)

- Ed Soares Clears Air On Lyoto Machida’s Decision For Turning Down Jon Jones Fight (Fightline)

- “Yes, those gashes are from elbows. Tough way to make a living, this MMA.” (Facebook.com/CagePotato)

- MMA: Inside the Cage #108 – “Armbars and Polish Stars” (MMA: Inside the Cage)

- 20 Disney Girls Who Got Hot (MadeMan)

- The Hilariously Depressing Theme Songs of Classic TV Sitcoms (EgoTV)

- Why Stressed-Out Men Are Attracted to Overweight Women (MensFitness)

- Kate Upton in Italian GQ (TurdFergusonBlog)

- Girls With Two Big Things Going for Them [Photos] (WorldWideInterweb)

(Henderson, at the exact moment in his career he realized he could’ve had a V8.) 

Had he known that his knee injury would ultimately play a role in one of the most embarrasing moments in MMA history not involving Ken Shamrock [Author's note: Now THAT is how you make shameless plugs flow with the context of your article.], we’re sure Dan Henderson and his camp would have done things much, much differently. But be that as it may, you might be surprised to learn that Hendo actually injured his knee some three weeks ago, but simply didn’t have the heart to admit defeat until his final day of sparring. FightersOnly has the scoop, via Hendo’s coach, Daniel Woirin:

Dan Henderson got hurt three weeks ago during sparring when he went to defend a takedown and for a while he has to be away from training, for two to three weeks. It was very difficult for him to refuse the fight. All the team had to convince him not to do it. 

We did a final sparring yesterday to evaluate his condition and he really didn’t have the chance to fight with Jones. It is so depressing for everybody. Many things are involved in a high-level fight like this one, but unfortunately, this happened. 

Now, where the Hendo/Amurica fan in me wants to simply chalk this up as a classic case of a 41 year-old man being stubborn (I imagine Hendo said something along the lines of “them book-reading doctor pussies ain’t gonna tell me what to do” at one point), I simply can’t overlook the fact that Dan’s camp made a huge mistake in waiting until the very last minute to pull out of the fight.

WAIT, WAIT, DON’T TURN YOUR BACK ON ME! I’M NOT DOUBTING HENDO. JON JONES IS AN A-HOLE. ARE WE COOL AGAIN?

(Click for full-size image.)

This double-scoop of blonde loveliness is Kendra Schnell, a Las Vegas based model who has spent the last two years carrying round cards for Tuff-N-Uff. The winner of this year’s Vegas Fighter Promo Model Search, Kendra is finishing up a marketing degree from UNLV, and digs go-karts and pizza. Be her friend on Facebook and Twitter, and check out a gallery of our favorite Kendra Schnell photos below…

(Who wants to take a wild guess at how Bones vs. Belfort will end? Anyone?)

There may only be a matter of hours separating us from the UFC/Dana White/Jon Jones’ decision to cancel Christmas UFC 151, yet it somehow feels as if every conceivable angle has already been pondered, publicized, and pettifogged to an exhausting extent. Fingers have been pointed in every direction; some say Jon Jones is to blame, some Greg Jackson, while others, like Cory Braiterman of MMAMania, feel that Dana White is more or less scapegoating Bones in an attempt to disguise the fact that UFC 151′s supporting card, and in fact many of the UFC’s recent cards, are kind of garbage ass, as BG put it (by the way, garbage ass is phrase that needs to catch on).

Throw in a clusterfuck of bitchassness in the light heavyweight contender pool, and we’ve been left with a “pound-for-pound great” fighting a middleweight whose chance of victory is apparently worse than the chance that you would be attacked by a circus lion in a convenient store twice. On the same day. In two different convenience stores. Seriously, Jones was only listed at -475 in a rematch with Lyoto Machida, and is now listed as high as -1500 over Belfort.

That is some garbage ass, right there.

But the man who has been caught in the middle of all this hate, champion Jon Jones, had remained silent on the issue in the immediate aftermath, likely until Team Jackson could draft up an apology for him to make (ZING!). However, in an interview with MMAJunkie last night, Jones was both apologetic and steadfast regarding his decision.

His remarks, along with the latest in Chael Sonnen’s epic trolljob, are after the jump. 

“I used to kind of have the opposite problem whenever I’d visit Thailand. Long story.”

And now for something completely different.

It’s 2012, yet I’m about to tell you that Ken Shamrock did something of relevance yesterday. Before you start to guess what he did: Yes, it was actually winning a fight – even though his opponent was just some random tubbaguts. No, it wasn’t a sanctioned MMA fight that he won. And obviously, it was pretty damn embarrassing for everyone involved. Give up yet? Brace yourselves…

Ken Shamrock, while breaking up a fight, got arrested for hitting a woman. His justification for hitting the woman wasn’t so much “She attacked me first, and I was simply defending myself” as it was the rock-solid “Wait, THAT’S a chick? For real? GET OUT!” defense.

Not that I think any of you are surprised by this, but let’s read what TMZ.com wrote about the incident after the jump:

(God damn it, Tim. We will never forgive you for this.)

We envisioned this week’s CagePotato Roundtable as a friendly take-down of everything from “Hello Japan!” to Tito Ortiz’s brief and terrifying career as a post-fight interviewer. But then a funny thing happened — the UFC canceled their first event of the Zuffa era due to a very unexpected decision by one of their champions, and the world exploded. The Jon Jones/UFC 151 fallout and much more will be covered in today’s column, so grab a beverage and get comfortable. And as always, if you have a topic idea for a future Roundtable, please send it to tips@cagepotato.com.

Seth Falvo

“World Combat League, bro. It already exists.”

In the perfect MMA Universe I envision whenever I eat enough Lotus Leaf, these words are uttered directly to MMA’s Vince Russo, Bob Meyrowitz, while he’s looking for investors for the mind-numbingly ridiculous YAMMA Pit Fighting. Upon hearing them, Bob decides to become a jaded boxing promoter, World Combat League is still the only promotion that uses a bowl as the fight surface and we are all spared the most stupid, embarrassing, gimmicky event since Heroes of Wrestling. Also in this universe: The Super Hulk division is recognized by the UFC as a real weight class, Paulo Filho never touches the GHB, Fedor knocks out Brock Lesnar and then retires as a UFC Heavyweight Champion and Chael Sonnen never attempts that freaking backfist. Who says us nerds don’t know how to party?

Of course, reality is a cruel mistress, and YAMMA Pit Fighting ended up happening despite the best efforts of an injury curse. Much like the aforementioned Heroes of Wrestling, Meyrowitz attempted to cash in on our love of nostalgia by booking a bunch of aging has-beens, never-weres, nobodies and ne’er-do-wells to compete in the promotion’s inaugural event. Never mind that half of the roster hasn’t been relevant in a decade (using “relevant” as loosely as possible in some cases), or that one of the fighters was best known for getting knocked out by a leg kick, or that another fighter was best known to casual fans for his stint on Celebrity Rehab; they’re going to brawl, you guys! Add on one of Brock Lesnar’s Team Deathclutch punching bags, the cheapest journeyman-for-hire you can find, an obese former Toughman Contest champion and some obscure Russians who dabble at sambo — because, you know, Fedor — and we’ll have all the tools for an exciting bankruptcy case after no one watches this. Tack on the incredibly cheesy, stuck-in-the-mid-90s “On the streets it’s against the law — in the pit it is the law” tagline, and laissez les bons temps rouler.

(“Vitor, my brother, you must take this fight for me. I have, how you say, too much pussy.”)

Remember how badly Lyoto Machida wanted a rematch with Jon Jones? Well, he didn’t want it badly enough to fight Jones on a month’s notice. In the latest chapter of the UFC’s most bizarre storyline of 2012, it was revealed late last night by MMAFighting that Machida decided he needed more time to prepare for another title fight against the light-heavyweight champ, and has turned down the opportunity. Machida had briefly been scheduled to face Jones at UFC 152 on September 22nd. (Yes, we’re calling it UFC 152 again. “UFC 151 will be remembered as the event Jon Jones and Greg Jackson murdered,” according to UFC president Dana White.)

The UFC’s next choice for Jones’s opponent was, logically, Mauricio “Shogun” Rua, who also “won impressively” at UFC on FOX 4. But as Lance Pugmire of the LA Times tweeted, Shogun also turned down the fight. Unbelievable. And so, Dana’s hate list grows larger by the day.

But look, on the horizon…a savior. For some reason, middleweight contender Vitor Belfort was offered the chance to fight Jones at UFC 152, which he happily accepted. Said Belfort: “Where a lot of guys are acting like divas I think this is a big challenge for any fighter. I have all the respect for Jones. That’s why you can’t miss this competition. I will not let no one down. I come from the times of Carlson Gracie. He lives inside of me.” Belfort was originally slated to fight Alan Belcher at UFC 153 in Rio.

(Suddenly, the decision to sponsor this guy seems like not so great of an idea.) 

Boy oh boy, have the events of this afternoon trapped everyone in a glass case of emotion or what? We’re going to forgo the typical “aftermath” aspect of this…aftermath, because suffice it to say, you are already aware of what has gone down. Looking ahead, it appears Jon Jones will be facing Lyoto Machida (again) at UFC 152 in Toronto (again). It also appears that all of the claims that “Lyoto TOTALLY won a round against Bones, you guys” — as if he, you know, didn’t get sliced open and choked unconscious shortly thereafter — have had some effect on the bookies. At least for now.

BestFightOdds currently has Jones listed between -475 and -485 for his rematch with “The Dragon,” which is actually not as bad (for Machida, at least) as the -600 Jones was listed at when these two first squared off. Who knows how far that number will sway in the next few weeks, but we’re guessing it will only increase in Jones’ favor as time passes.

But that’s not the story here. The real story is that, due to the cancellation of UFC 151, a lot of fighters are getting royally screwed. Sure, the UFC could reimburse them with their show money (as if they’re not losing a shitload of it already), but these fighters rely on sponsorship money to truly put them in the green. That money has seemingly dissapeared, and man are they pissed about it. After all, when you only fight a few times a year (at best) for next-to-nothing, missing a fight can have serious financial consequences. And the poor saps who will now be missing another paycheck are letting Jones have it on Twitter.

The best responses are after the jump. 

(We know, guys, we know…)

It doesn’t really matter how we lead into this knockout video, which features Anderson Silva Jr. a.k.a Michael Page at his highlighty best during a mixed rules bout at last weekend’s UCMMA 29 card. These words are ultimately meaningless; they might as well be gobbledygook. Because this knockout, though outstanding in its own right, barely stands a chance of distracting you from the bombshell that was dropped this afternoon. To sum things up using the words of the people who occupy my Twitter feed: No UFC 151. No Christmas. God is dead. Jon Jones is an scaredy-cat, punk-bitch, fake champ. Greg Jackson is a yoda-looking, wet blanket, douchenozzle. Etc, etc…

Check it out. Or don’t. Apathy has overwhelmed me. Walla, walla, walla peas and carrots.

Video after the jump. 

(Jon Jones is now the UFC’s public enemy #1. Does that mean we can come out of hiding now? / Photo via MMAJunkie)

The rumors were true — and even worse than we thought. Due to a knee injury suffered in training, Dan Henderson has been forced to withdraw from his scheduled light-heavyweight title fight against Jon Jones at UFC 151, and because the UFC couldn’t find a suitable main event replacement, the UFC is canceling an event for the first time in the Zuffa era. Dana White confirmed the news in a press conference held earlier today — describing the cancellation as “probably one of my all-time lows as being president of the UFC” — and he made no attempt to hide his heated emotions during the call. Here are the brass tacks…

- Henderson suffered a partial tear in his MCL during training, which was serious enough to keep him from competing.

- According to Dana White, Chael Sonnen immediately jumped up to take the fight (“I’ll fly to Vegas tonight and fight him,” White quoted Sonnen as saying), and the UFC immediately began preparing behind-the-scenes to promote Jones vs. Sonnen on eight days’ notice. But Jon Jones turned down the matchup, refusing to fight Sonnen on short notice.

- White is extremely upset that Jones, a UFC champion and pound-for-pound candidate, would turn down a fight that would save an event. Even Tito Ortiz never pulled this shit, he pointed out. White lambasted the idea that Jones would turn this fight down for business reasons. “If he was a businessman, we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now,” he said. White agreed that his relationship with Jones would change “a lot” after this: “Me and Lorenzo are both disgusted.” Later in the call, White pointed out how Jones turning down the fight now screws all the supporting-card fighters out of paychecks.

- White saved additional venom for trainer Greg Jackson, who reportedly told Jones, “There’s no way you take this fight on eight days notice, it would be the biggest mistake of your entire career.” Said White: “How much faith do you have in your champion and your guy? [Jackson] is a fucking sport killer. This guy’s from another planet….Greg Jackson should never be interviewed by anybody ever again, except by a psychiatrist.”

(You see this move, right here? PUSSY MAGNET.) 

There’s been a lot of talk regarding Jon Jones, Dan Henderson, and GOATS around here lately, but if any of the rumors circulating Twitter right now have any truth to them, we might just have to put that discussion on hold for a while. And although tweets from random sources don’t constitute truth, the sheer volume of them that have been sent out claiming that Henderson has suffered a knee injury in training are making us feel sick to our stomachs nonetheless. Take a look for yourselves:

Kenny Florian ?@kennyflorian
Hearing that we may have some disappointed @UFC fans soon due to some unfortunate circumstances for an upcoming card

Luke Thomas ?@SBNLukeThomas
@KCBanditMMA @jamiekilstein if what I’m hearing is correct, it’s so much worse than what is even being rumored on Twitter.

 Luke Thomas ?@SBNLukeThomas
@Jdiddy381 @KCBanditMMA @jamiekilstein again, I’m not talking about Hendo’s health when I say the matter is ‘worse’. Relax, people.

Jeremy Botter ?@jeremybotter
If what I’m hearing is correct, UFC 151 may be in desperate need of a main event. And that sucks.

Matt Lindland ?@mattlindland
Rumor? @MattHawryluk94: @tarecfighter rumor is Hendo is out with a knee injury, please tell me it is not true!

FrontRowBrian FrontRowBrian ?@FrontRowBrian
Rumor going around Hendo was injured by Thierry Sokoudjou at some point in this camp. Appears he’ll press on.. if he has to crawl to cage. 
Someone described the brace Hendo is wearing as a “Stone Cold Steve Austin brace”.

Again, we’re not writing this without first understanding the power of rumor, but considering some of the sources (Kenny Florian, Luke Thomas), we might be looking at either a severely hampered Hendo come next Saturday, or no Hendo at all. And who do you think the UFC would replace him with on such short notice? Surely not this guy, right? Or are all the pieces of our conspiracy puzzle falling into place exactly according to plan? MWAHAHAHAHA!!

(Jon Jones, pound-for-pound G.S.J.O.A.T.)

By George Shunick

With his recent apprehensions about a rematch with Lyoto Machida and the Twitter war beatdown he suffered at the hands of Chael P. Sonnen, it’s safe to say it hasn’t been a fun week for Jon Jones’ PR advisors. (Jones’s longtime publicist John Fuller actually resigned earlier this week; make of that what you will.) The familiar critiques of Jones being cocky and arrogant have once again intensified leading up to his next title defense against Dan Henderson. Of course, Jon Jones isn’t the first combat sports athlete to suffer these criticisms, despite arguably possessing the skill set to justify his conspicuous confidence. Before him, there was another young, brash, cocky, black fighter – black athletes being historically stereotyped and criticized as cocky and disrespectful by some inane, unwritten code of sporting ethics – who also had to suffer criticisms of arrogance: Muhammad Ali.

Perhaps it is because of their similarities that Jones has attempted to model himself after Ali, or at least inspire comparisons between the two. Perhaps he looks at how people perceived Ali when he fought, and feels that if he evokes the aura of Ali he will eventually be absolved of the criticisms he faces today. After all, when we look at Ali now, we say he was “confident” rather than “cocky” – that his accomplishments in the ring ultimately justified his persona. Jones has accomplished such a startling amount in such a short time, but his accomplishments are somehow not yet considered sufficient to justify his ego. Why the disparity? In short, Ali wasn’t just brash and cocky – he was a man of absolute moral conviction. If Jon Jones wants to stifle his critics, he must cultivate that aura of conviction, that willingness to sacrifice convenience for the sake of some higher goal. So far, he hasn’t been able to do that.

(Props: YouTube.com/JonJones. Fight starts at the 13:50 mark, but it’s worth it to watch the entrances, just to see Jackson and Jones walk out to those obviously patched-in nü-metal tracks, I guess because the UFC couldn’t secure replay rights on YouTube for the songs they actually walked out to. It’s hilariously jarring. Couldn’t they find generic rap tracks to include for situations like this?)

After winning the UFC light-heavyweight championship in March 2011 with his demolition of Mauricio Rua, 24-year-old Jon Jones attempted his first title defense in September at UFC 135 in Denver, against former champion Quinton Jackson. And for the second title fight in a row, Jones gave nothing and took everything. Over four rounds, Bones picked his shots and wore Rampage down, confounding Jackson with his unorthodox kicks and elbows, and clowning ‘Page whenever the inspiration struck. (Skip to 31:08 for an all-time classic.)

After winning the first three rounds handily, Jones closed the curtains in the fourth frame, taking Jackson down with ease then finishing him with a rear-naked choke. It was the first time Jackson was ever stopped in the UFC. To put it lightly, aging legends have never really performed well against Jon Jones, and Dan Henderson might not fare any better at UFC 151 — that is, if Hendo actually makes it to the fight. There are some nasty rumors swirling around right now…we’ll update you if they turn out to be legit.

(WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE’S NO FOAMING OF THE MOUTH ALLOWED IN THIS ARENA?!)

You might recall that in the immediate aftermath of Ronda Rousey’s win over Sarah Kaufman last weekend, “Rowdy” called out former women’s featherweight champion Cris Cyborg. Unlike past Strikeforce events, Cyborg was not allowed to enter the ring and cause a full-fledged riot for our entertainment, and in fact was actually removed from her seat in the audience before the fight even started.

Why, you ask? Well, it turns out that the California State Athletic Commission has a rule declaring that any fighter under a current suspension is not allowed inside to be at a professional mixed martial arts event. Cyborg shared your current confusion while she was being removed form the audience, telling Tatame in a recent interview:

I watched all fights but on the last one, Ronda’s, a woman working on the event came to tell me I had to leave because the commission doesn’t accept suspended athletes on the shows. My manager talked to the guys at the commission and there’s really a law that says that.

I was upset for the way they treated me. They could’ve pulled me on a corner and told me, not in front of the fans. I was taking pictures and they interrupted me, saying I had to go. It was very disrespectful. I believe a champion deserves to be treated with respect. Everyone knows an athlete’s life isn’t easy, so all fighters deserve respect. When I was in Brazil I watched UFC and there was no problem.

An odd rule indeed, made all the more unusual by the fact that the commission decided to wait until the main event to inform Cyborg that she wasn’t supposed to be there in the first place, which is the equivalent of letting a homeless man wander into your dinner party uninvited and waiting until the nightcap to kick him out.

More news on the Cyborg/Rousey match is after the jump.

It might take Real Crime’s documentary on the biggest cash heist in British history some thirty minutes to get to former UFC fighter Lee Murray, but that doesn’t make it any less entertaining. Detailing the intricate, if not mismanaged, raid of the Medway cash depot in Kent, South East England on February 22nd, 2006, Real Crime provides an enthralling look back at the whos, wheres, and hows of the meticulously planned heist unlike any other documentary in recent memory.

Managing to get interviews with everyone from Colin Dixon, the manager of the depot who was held hostage along with his family and coworkers, to Dave O’Donnell, an English fight promoter who simply cannot speak highly enough of Murray despite the evidence at hand, this documentary labels Murray “the mastermind” behind the entire escapade, which resulted in the theft of over 53 million pounds (84 million dollars). Murray and his gang utilized prosthetic masks, fake police uniforms, hidden cameras, and an arsenal of weapons that would make the cast of Predator blush to pull off their crime, only to be caught within the four months that followed it. Murray was sentenced to 10 years in Moroccan prison for his role in the heist, where he managed to pull off an even greater one: fathering a child and skipping out on the alimony payments LIKE A BOSS.

Unfortunately, the documentary fails to provide any insight regarding “Lightning’s” back alley brawl with Tito Ortiz, which is what we all really want to know about. But check out the video above, which features several highlights from Murray’s fight with Anderson Silva, and learn yourself something new. Who knows, maybe you can use this information to one day pull off an even greater robbery and actually get away with it. May the force be with you.

After the jump: A full video of Murray vs. Silva, because we’ve got to make this MMA-related somehow.

(Props: Faline Photography. Click for full-size version.)

Jenae “Turbo” Noonan is an MMA fighter, kickboxer, boxer, model, motivational speaker, and vegan, who returns to competition on October 13th, when she’ll be representing the U.S.A. at the next World Sports MMA tournament in Moscow. According to this new Babes of MMA interview, Noonan got involved in MMA when she moved into a house with UFC vets Javier Vasquez and Gabe Ruediger, who took her to their gyms and started working with her. Currently based in Pomona, California, the foxy redhead works out at the King of Kings boxing gym in Covina, the UFC Gym in Rosemead, and the University of La Verne for strength and conditioning.

Check out some of our favorite Jenae Noonan photos in the gallery below, and if you want to see more, visit her on Facebook, Twitter, and ModelMayhem. And if you’re really feeling generous, donate a few bucks for her upcoming trip to Russia!

(Pic Props: MMA Photoshops)

By Jason Moles and Doug “ReX” Richardson

Before the ink on the contract dried, MMA fans began debating if Dan “Hendo” Henderson would become the greatest light heavyweight champion of all time should he beat Jon “Bones” Jones at UFC 151. While that is certainly entertaining water cooler fodder, I’m not so sure it’s a conversation we’re even allowed to have at this point. Remember the old Ric Flair maxim, “To be the man, you gotta beat the man.” Are you certain that Jones is the man? Before you get all up in arms about the perceived blasphemy, consider this: legacies are not born overnight. A legacy is built over years of dominance — after much blood, sweat and tears have been spilled. Although both Jones and Henderson were nominated for being the Best American Fighter in MMA History, I still wasn’t convinced the winner of the fight would automatically reach GOAT status. That’s where Rex comes in. Join us, won’t you, as we banter back and forth over a couple of cold ones…

Alright Rex, before we go any further let’s settle this one small thing: Who is the current holder of the “Greatest Light Heavyweight Champ of All Time?”

RX: Well, technically speaking, Dan Henderson has only held a light-heavyweight championship once: in Strikeforce, for like five minutes before he said “Deuce, bitches” and bulked up to heavyweight. While I think we all agree that a Strikeforce title doesn’t count because LOLOL, the fact remains that Hendo is making a strong argument for true GOAT status, not just as a light heavy, but as a fighter, period.

JM: For me, it’s gotta be Chuck Liddell. His record speaks for itself, but we’ll get to that in a minute. When you think of UFC, you almost immediately think of Liddell. Why do you suppose that is? I’ll tell you — it’s because he was the sport’s first crossover star. The Hall of Famer and former light heavyweight champion “wrote” a best-selling autobiography, made numerous television and movie cameos, and was the first UFC fighter to appear on the cover of ESPN the Magazine. When I think of greatness, I think big-picture, in and out of the Octagon.

(I met three women with these blank, emotionless faces and…the blackest eyes. The devil’s eyes. Props to our buddies at FilmDrunk for the find.)

It’s pretty common knowledge that most of the writers here at CP have a particularly dark sense of humor. We talk about death around the water cooler with the casual, nonchalant attitude that coworkers in normal society exude when discussing TPS reports or last night’s episode of The Big Bang Theory. Our hearts are basically filled with obsidian, which we write off as a coping mechanism to deal the disintegrating society in which we live.

But apparently we don’t even hold a candle to the ladies running the Hands of Our Future Daycare in Dover, Delaware, who were recently arrested for staging, then recording, a fight between two three-year old children who had been dropped off at the daycare center earlier that morning.

Sound familiar?

Full story after the jump. 

(True story.)

As a wise man once tweeted, “everyone likes surprises.” Nevertheless, Miguel Torres probably didn’t enjoy the surprise he got recently when he found out that he had been cut for the second time by the UFC. Torres confirmed on his official website that he was handed his walking papers following his first-round knockout loss against rising star Michael McDonald at UFC 145. The firing follows a temporary release in December, which Torres caught for rape-joke-related offenses.

At one point the most dominant bantamweight in the history of the sport, Torres ends his UFC stint with an underwhelming record of 2-2, including decision wins over Antonio Banuelos and Nick Pace, and losses to McDonald and Demetrious Johnson. Prior to that, Torres spent three fruitful years in the WEC, where he won the promotion’s 135-pound belt and successfully defended it three times before a pair of stoppage losses to Brian Bowles and Joseph Benavidez permanently dethroned him.

(Props: fueltv)

Following his second heartbreaking decision loss to Ben Henderson, former UFC lightweight champion Frankie Edgar has made the decision to drop to featherweight. The news was broken by Ariel Helwani yesterday on FUEL TV’s UFC Tonight. Since he reportedly walks around at less than 160 pounds, it’ll be a much more competitive division for Edgar, who has generally been out-sized in the Octagon, sometimes significantly. Of course, when Edgar began his UFC career in February 2007, featherweight wasn’t even an option.

Edgar is looking at December for his 145-pound debut, against an opponent to be named later. Though Frankie will likely have to win at least one fight before getting a crack at the title, featherweight champion Jose Aldo — who fights Erik Koch in October — is already laying the groundwork for a heated rivalry. As “Scarface” told Tatame:

(Realizing his impending doom, Chael signaled to his wife that her weekly sandwich quota would be doubling in the near future.) 

When it was originally announced that Chael Sonnen would be returning to the light heavyweight division to face Forrest Griffin at UFC 155, we took it as a classic case of a fighter changing weight classes in order to save his career. He had come up short in both his title shots at middleweight, and as Josh Koscheck would tell you if he was aware of it, the chances of any 0-2 fighter receiving a third shot against the same champion is next to impossible. And being that Chael fraking Sonnen is not a man who fights anything but marquee fights these days, his chances to make waves at 205 were clearly better than his chances at 185. The fact that he could barely even make the announcement without drawing Jon Jones into a Twitter war only confirms Sonnen’s devious intentions.

And as is usually the case, Chael was successful in drawing us out of the woodwork to throw his name in with the phrase “title shot,” whether it was in agreement or bitter disapproval of the idea. Because Sonnen is like the entire cast of a heist movie packed into one person when it comes to hustling in the MMA game, capable of releasing more red herrings, smoke signals, and false MacGuffins than Ocean’s Eleven through Thirteen combined. Hell, I immediately launched into a vast conspiracy theory in which Sonnen became the number one contender and Jones possibly faked injury in order to set up a fight between them down the line.

But I live in a world of paranoia, delusion, and fear. One that apparently many of you are living in as well, because in a recent appearance on Las Vegas’ “Dave and Mahoney” show, Dana White addressed the concerns that a lot of us are sharing, another undeserved title shot for Sonnen.

Dana’s remarks are after the jump. 

(Well, at least she has looking hot in front of a camera as a fallback career.) 

Although the main card of Strikeforce: Rousey vs. Kaufman card provided most of the evening’s highlights, you would be hard pressed to find an MMA site that didn’t declare Miesha Tate’s come-from-behind win (insert puns now) over Julie Kedzie to be the most exciting fight of the evening. Despite being rocked on various occasions and almost ending up as the first entry in the head-kick-nip-slip Hall of Fame, Tate was able to brave the storm and score an armbar victory of her own late in the third round.

But up until that point, it was plain to see that there was clearly something a little off about the former title holder. Her combinations came few and far between, and her takedown attempts seemed to be lacking a certain gusto that they had previously held. While part of this could be attributed to the toughness of Kedzie, who has been training at Greg Jackson’s gym for some time now (and is in fact his personal assistant), an equal amount could just as easily be blamed on Tate’s somewhat lackadaisical attitude in the cage on Saturday night.

The fact that she still managed to pull off an amazing, gritty win over a tough opponent despite this only shows what caliber of fighter Tate truly is, but according to the source herself, we might not be seeing “Cupcake” in action for a while. In a recent interview with Ariel Helwani during The MMA Hour, Tate explained that she simply “didn’t feel the passion and fire that [she] had felt in her previous fights” when facing Kedzie:

I felt out of my element, I didn’t feel normal in there whatsoever. It was very strange, it was not a feeling I enjoyed and not something I want to experience again, I don’t really know what my next step is here. Even when I was when lined up with Julie, across the cage, I was like, ‘Is this really happening right now? Am I really here? Am I really in this fight?’ I felt like I was kind of just in this twilight zone. I did not like that. It’s not how I normally feel, not how emotions really run. Normally I’m excited to be there, I’m amped and pumped, and I felt little to nothing, and I mean, she literally elbowed me and got my lip really good and I was like ‘ehh, whatever.’ She kicked me in the face, ‘ehh, whatever,’ It was not, it wasn’t a normal circumstance for me I don’t know why that is but I’m asking myself a lot of questions. I think I need to take a step back, relax a minute, and evaluate it. 

More from this interview is after the jump.

(Props: CNN.com)

Well this is a welcome change of pace — a politician who not only understands and supports MMA, but is gutsy enough to step into the cage and try it for himself. The story of Nevada Secretary of State Ross Miller‘s amateur MMA debut/retirement has been sweeping the Internet since last night. The 36-year-old Democrat and Las Vegas native grew up around Nevada’s combat sports scene, became a fan of the UFC, and began training in MMA a few years ago. The sport became “an absolute passion” for Miller, who spent the last year preparing for his first amateur fight.

That fight went down this past Saturday night at the World Fighting Championships‘ “MMA at the Lake” event in South Lake Tahoe, where the 6’4″ Miller competed in a light-heavyweight match against an opponent named Jamal Williams. As a favor to the Secretary of State, the match was kept a secret by WFC promoter Matt McGovern. And while Miller eventually came away with a second-round TKO victory, the fight didn’t exactly go as planned. As Miller explained to MMAJunkie:

“It was much different than sparring,” Miller admitted. “I froze a little bit. I had a tough time letting my hands go. I didn’t teep at all, which I usually do in sparring. I threw very few kicks. The gameplan was to set up a couple of punches and maybe a leg kick and take him down and try to submit him because he didn’t appear to have much jiu-jitsu. That’s not how the first round worked out at all.

“At the end of the first round, my cornerman came in, and I asked him, ‘Where’s the stool?’ He said, ‘There is no stool.’ I said, ‘You didn’t think this was going to go to the second round?’ He said, ‘I think you just need to relax, breathe and start listening to us because you’re scaring the hell out of us’”…