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21 Incredible Minimalist Movie Posters

March, 2013

Hot Potato: 12 Photos of World Series of Fighting Ring Girl Jessica Sutton


(Photo via Jessica Sutton’s Model Mayhem page. Click for larger version. Full gallery is after the jump.)

A member of World Series of Fighting‘s all-star crew of ring girls, Jessica Sutton is a New Jersey-bred model who will be returning to her home state for WSOF 2: Arlovski vs. Johnson this Saturday in Atlantic City. Now making her home in Las Vegas, the self-described “hustler” also works as a rental property owner, licensed hair-stylist, and cocktail waitress. Check out more of our favorite Jessica Sutton photos in the gallery below, and follow her on Facebook and Twitter for more!

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CagePotato Ban: MMA Fighters Announcing Their Retirement, Then Immediately Unretiring


(Okay, okay, okay, *you* can do whatever you want, Aleks. Just stop looking at us like that.) 

Earlier today, it was announced that former PRIDE star and perpetual blue-balled can crusher, Aleksander Emelianenko, had signed a multi-fight deal with the Russian organization ProFC. Which would be fine, had Emelianenko not announced his retirement from the sport three months earlier after being shitcanned by M-1 Global. Many of you are probably wondering why we are wasting our time poking fun at a long-since relevant Emelianenko brother when we could be, I dunno, predicting who is most likely to test positive for quaaludes at UFC 159, but Aleks’ recent revelation highlights a growing problem amongst MMA fighters: understanding what the term “retirement” is supposed to mean.

Look, we get it. Everyone from Michael Jordan to Muhammad Ali have announced their retirement from their respective sports in the past, only to recant shortly thereafter. It’s understandable to a degree, especially in the fight game. A guy suffers a couple tough losses, begins to fear for his own health, and decides that it is in his best interest — as well as his family’s — to call it a career before he suffers an injury he cannot come back from. Then, after adjusting to the stale, mundane existence that constitutes the lives of most non-fighters, he begins to convince himself that he’s always had “it,” but has just been held back by issues in his training camp, at home, in their own mind etc. — issues which are now completely behind him. If only it were that simple.

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Four Reasons to Be Moderately Excited for Tonight’s Bellator 93 Event

Since switching to the “Thursday Night Fights” format, Bellator has been consistently cranking out high quality fight cards that often compensate for their lack of name value with exciting finishes and entertaining brawls to boot. Then again, with all of their biggest starts consistently underperforming, Bellator’s cards often live and die by the performances of their lesser known fighters. Tonight’s Bellator 93 card is no different, featuring a slew of relative unknowns and up-and-comers that are all but guaranteed to deliver in terms of entertainment. Here’s why you should be watching when they do…

1. Michael. F’in. Page. 

Despite his short time in the sport, Michael “Venom” Page might just be the most hyped fighter currently outside of the UFC. At just 3-0, the British phenom has already drawn comparisons to Jimi Manuwa and even Anderson Silva for his flashy yet devastating style of striking. Just check out the above video of Page clowning Ben Dishman in his professional debut (fight starts at the 3 minute mark) and tell us that the sky isn’t the limit for this kid. On the heels of a doctor stoppage TKO victory at Super Fight League 7, Page will be taking on relative unknown Ryan Sanders, who has dropped three of his past four fights. Yeah, this is not going to end well for him. But it probably will for fans of horrifying knockouts.

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St-Pierre vs. Diaz Expected to Top 800,000 Pay-Per-View Buys, Making It UFC’s Second-Best Showing in Two Years


(GSP’s ground-and-pound = anti-bullshit-kryptonite. / Photo via Eric Bolte, USA TODAY Sports)

Predictable or not, UFC fans are still happy to open their wallets for the privilege of watching Georges St. Pierre thoroughly dominate his opponents for 25 minutes. According to a new report by Dave Meltzer, UFC 158 is expected to be one of the greatest pay-per-view showings of GSP’s career, with over 800,000 buys estimated. That figure would make UFC 158 the most-bought UFC event since last July’s UFC 148: Silva vs. Sonnen II card (925,000 buys), and could put it slightly higher than 2011′s most-popular show — UFC 129 (“around 800,000 buys“), which was also headlined by Georges St. Pierre.

You can give some credit for Nick Diaz for hyping the fight in his own unique way, but St. Pierre remains the UFC’s most reliable PPV draw in the post-Lesnar era. Getting GSP to fight as often as possible would help turn the UFC’s downward-trending PPV momentum in a positive direction. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like that will happen. According to St. Pierre’s trainer Firas Zahabi, GSP suffered an achilles injury before the fight, and will take some time off to rehab it; Zahabi said he didn’t want his star pupil to return to action for at least six months, though St. Pierre could return before then.

“He wants to take a couple of months off because his two fights were very close to each other and he wants to enjoy the summer,” Zahabi told TVA Sports. “We haven’t talked to the UFC yet, so we don’t know what their plans are for Georges yet.”

Get comfortable, Johny. You’re about to have some free time on your hands.

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Once Again, Paulo Filho Is In Full-Blown Panic-Attack Mode


(I believe that’s the universal puppy expression for “get me away from this crazy fucker.” / Photo via: sportv.globo.com)

World Series of Fighting took a major risk by putting Paulo Filho on the main card of its “Arlovski vs. Johnson” event this Saturday. Eccentric at best and tragically troubled at worst, the Brazilian cautionary tale has suffered countless career setbacks due to drug addiction, emotional breakdowns, and simple clerical errors. So maybe we should start preparing for the possibility that his scheduled match against David Branch might not happen. Let’s just call it a hunch — a hunch based on the fact that Filho missed his flight to Atlantic City on Tuesday due to a panic attack.

MMAFighting passed along that news last night, adding the following: “On Wednesday, though, Filho confirmed that he was on a plane headed to New Jersey, so as of Wednesday night, the Filho vs. Branch fight is still on.” Oh, Filho confirmed it? Well, then. Crisis averted. I’m sure he’s not hiding in an underground bunker somewhere deep within the Amazon rainforest, surrounded by boxes and boxes of sleeveless flannel shirts.

We’ll keep you posted if we hear more. I think at this point, a blown weigh-in and distracted performance would be a best-case scenario. The smart money’s still on “no-show,” though.

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‘The Ultimate Fighter: Team Jones vs. Team Sonnen’ Episode 9 — Complete Video & Recap


(Video courtesy of Hulu.) 

Apologies in advance for dropping the ball on last week’s episode of The Ultimate Fighter: Jones vs. Sonnen, which we completely forgot to recap for reasons that are not immediately obvious (if only we could get Danga to set down the bong for like thirty seconds…). Long story short: Chael Sonnen emerged victorious from a Coaches Challenge that involved stacking tires with excavators (?) and Team Jones’ Dylan Andrews secured a spot in the quarterfinals with a majority decision victory over Zak Cummings. For this week’s “Wild Card” matchup, Team Jones’ Bubba McDaniel and Team Sonnen’s Kevin Casey were selected.

To find out which fighter secured the final spot in the TUF 17 bracket, as well as the rest of last night’s highlights, join us after the jump.

- In a final effort to make us sympathize with noted codpiece Bubba McDaniel, last night’s episode began with McDaniel telling us his “I’m a poor little sad sack” story about how he can’t see his daughter because he is too far in debt.

I don’t know why I just downplayed a story as sad as that for laughs, and I apologize. God I’m dead inside…

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‘UFC on FUEL 8′ Drug Tests Nail Alex Caceres (Marijuana) and Riki Fukuda (Stimulants)


(Alex asks that you respect his privacy at this time, and would like to state for the record that Cool Ranch Doritos Locos Tacos were originally his idea. / Photo via MMAWeekly)

And the hits just keep coming, folks. In the immediate wake of Lavar Johnson’s apparent steroid bust after UFC 157, two more fighters have been flagged for failed drug tests following their performances at UFC on FUEL 8: Silva vs. Stann. With no regulating body in place, UFC officials oversaw the testing of fighters at the March 3rd event in Saitama, Japan.

First up on the naughty list is Alex “Bruce Leroy” Caceres, who tested positive for marijuana metabolites after his split-decision win over Kyung Ho Kang during the UFC on FUEL 8 prelims. Caceres will be suspended six months, and must attend drug rehabilitation classes and pass a drug test before he’s allowed to return. Furthermore, his victory over Kang — which would have been his third-straight in the UFC — has been changed to a no-contest. Caceres joins Matt Riddle, Thiago Silva, Dave Herman, Nick Diaz, and Nick Diaz’s friends in the growing list of publicly-outed potheads.

Also caught in the latest drug-sweep was Japanese middleweight Riki Fukuda, who lost a decision to Brad Tavares on the night in question. According to MMAJunkie, Fukuda tested positive for the banned stimulants phenylpropanolamine (never heard of it), norpseudoephedrine (never heard of it), and ephedrine (love that stuff). Sadly, Fukuda isn’t getting off with a suspension — he’s already been released by the UFC. The loss to Tavares dropped Fukuda’s Octagon record to 2-3, with all fights going the distance.

Damn…steroids, weed, and uppers in the same day — or as we like to call it, “The Tijuana Triathlon.” Get your shit together, UFC fighters.

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With Her Original Opponent Injured, Cris Cyborg to Smash Fiona Muxlow at Invicta FC 5


(“Oh hey, didn’t see you there. When my doctor first informed me that I would be getting murdered by Cris Cyborg this April, I had lots of questions; Is there anything I can do to prevent getting murdered? Would bringing a friend to the fight help my chances? Why me, God, WHYYYY?!“) 

It has recently been announced that Cris Cyborg’s originally scheduled opponent for her Invicta FC debut on April 5th, Ediane Gomes, has been forced to withdraw from their Invicta FC 5 bout with a rib injury. It’s a real shame, because as someone who used to beat up dudes on the Brazilian underground fight circuit (Fallon Fox’s doppelganger, if you will.*fires invisible pistols*), Gomes was being given more than a snowball’s chance in Hell against Cyborg, a privilege few of her opponents have been able to enjoy.

But now, stepping in on short notice against the former Strikeforce women’s featherweight champ will be Fiona Muxlow, a 6-2 grappling specialist out of Queensland, Australia. Originally scheduled to face Julia Budd at the event (who is now awaiting a replacement opponent as of this write up), Muxlow has not competed since dropping a first round armbar to Marloes Coenen at DREAM 18 on New Year’s Eve last year, snapping a three fight win streak in the process.

Although Muxlow is coming off a loss — one she was utterly dominated in at that — and lacks any notable victories, one should look beyond the numbers to see what this woman is truly capable of. For starters, she began her MMA career by submitting three straight opponents in a one night tournament, so we know she’s a finisher and has cardio for days to boot. Secondly, Muxlow has a poker face that will burn a hole right through your soul. That HAS to count for something in this topsy-turvy world, dammit.

Now that Invicta will be implementing “random” drug tests in the near future, does anyone give Muxlow a decent chance against Cyborg, or should we just start prepping the hospital bed?

-J. Jones

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We Just Came Heartbreakingly Close to a Third Double-Knockout in a Single Month [VIDEO]


(Props: MMA THE ZONE via MiddleEasy, once again)

As Ace Rothstein might say, “the probability on one [double-knockout] is a million-and-a-half to one. On three [fights in a single month] it’s in the billions. It cannot happen, would not happen, you fuckin’ mo-mo, whatsa matta wit you??

The fact that we saw double KO’s twice already in March — this clean double-dinger and this epic stumble-fest — is a statistical anomaly on par with Wanderlei Silva winning by choke. And bizarrely enough, it almost happened again in a fight between Kerwin Sherrill and Derek Thompson at MCF6 in North Platte, Nebraska, on Saturday. This time, it seemed like the referee’s utter shock is the only thing that prevented him from stopping the fight an immediate no-contest/draw/whatever it is that happens when two guys dummy each other up at the same time.

Thompson went on to win the match, and likely claimed that he was “never really that hurt” in his post-fight interview.

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Lavar Johnson’s Post-UFC 157 Drug Test Comes Back Positive for Elevated Testosterone


(Image via Esther Lin/MMAFighting.com)

UFC heavyweight Lavar Johnson — who directly inspired our “Will You Be Fired…” flowchart by not getting fired following his UFC 157 loss to Brendan Schaub — caught a bit of bad news yesterday. The California State Athletic Commission revealed (via MMAJunkie) that Johnson’s post-fight drug test at the February 23rd event was flagged for elevated levels of testosterone. A follow-up carbon isotope ratio test “confirmed the testosterone was consistent with the administration of a steroid.”

No word yet on what that steroid was specifically or how high his T-levels were, but damn Lavar, you in troubllllllle. A suspension and fine are likely imminent, and the failed test could eliminate the good-will that Johnson has built up with his employers by always coming to bang.

It’s also noteworthy that Johnson’s drug test involved a carbon isotope ratio test, which “examines the atomic make-up of testosterone in the urine to determine if it is natural or synthetic.” The UFC has drawn some criticism in the past for not using this effective method of catching cheaters. Is the promotion about to get tougher in its anti-doping efforts? And could this be related to Dana White’s recent vow to “test the [expletive]” out of TRT abusers? We’ll update you when we know more…

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