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15 Moments of Instant Regret [GIFs]

October, 2013

And Now He’s Fired, Again: Joey Beltran Released by UFC After Failed Stint at Light-Heavyweight


(We’ll say one thing for Joey: He kept it gangster. / Photo via Getty)

There are some UFC firings that are shocking or at least sort of controversial. Then there are others you can see coming a mile away. Joey “The Mexicutioner” Beltran‘s latest dismissal by the UFC certainly falls into that second category. Beltran confirmed his latest release yesterday via twitter.

Already fired once in early 2012 following a 3-4 stint at heavyweight — which ended in back-to-back losses against Stipe Miocic and Lavar Johnson — Beltran immediately shed some pounds and tried to reinvent himself as a light-heavyweight. After beating a dude named Anton Talamantes by decision last April, the UFC called Beltran back up to the big leagues two months later for an injury-replacement fight against James Te Huna. Beltran lost the fight by decision — but the match won a Fight of the Night award, and secured Beltran another shot in the Octagon. Everybody loves a gritty Mexican brawler, right?

Beltran followed up his return fight by testing positive for steroids after a unanimous decision win against Igor Pokrajac — the fight was overturned to a no-contest — and losing a split-decision to Fabio Maldonado earlier this month in an match that impressed nobody. All in all, Beltran’s run at 205 pounds resulted in a UFC record of 0-2 with one no-contest/steroid bust; he was winless in his last five Octagon appearances.

The only question that remains is this: Bellator or WSOF?

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NATE DIAZ, YOU HAVE BEEN SELECTED

By Diego Sanchez*

…TO BE CLEANSED BY THE HOLY FLAME OF OUR LORD ALMIGHTY. For I, “The Dream,” am his vessel, the grail from which his vengeance is spilled unto the meek, uncultivated swine of this forsaken planet. Yes! Yeessssssss!!

I AM A SAVAGE. A savage who has returned to the 155 pound division to prove to the world that it is physically possible to love something to death. My enthusiasm is a river which shall break the levy of your insolence.

What must I do to draw your attention, Nate? I called you out when I announced my return to lightweight, and just yesterday, I even resorted to your species’ archaic, Godless device of social communication to further needle you. Yet still you do not respond. Is it because you KNOW and FEAR that which is “The Dream?” That whose spirit can not be broken? CONFESS AND YOU SHALL BE SAVED. YESS!!

Forget your upcoming fight with Mr. Maynard, for we both know that your heart is not invested in that little escapade. Your heart will have no such option when we tangle, for I will expose it from your chest, hold it betwixt my fingers and show you His light. And in that fragile, fleeting moment, you will thank me. You will say, “I am grateful for your friendship, Diego. God bless you.” You will SURRENDER to my influence and join the army of DREAMERS I have amassed over the years!! YES!

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The UFC’s HIV Awareness Campaign Is Seriously Called ‘Protect Yourself at All Times’


(I suppose that would make Forrest’s loss to Anderson Silva a regrettable night of unprotected blackout sex in a truck-stop bathroom. / Image via OutSports)

The UFC has announced plans for a campaign to increase awareness of HIV and AIDS, particularly among high-risk groups. Yahoo! Sports’ Kevin Iole spoke with UFC chief operating officer Lawrence Epstein about the campaign recently.

“The Center for Disease Control & Prevention said the awareness about HIV and AIDS among those under 35 is surprisingly poor. Given that the UFC’s strength is with the 18-to-34-year-old demographic, chief operating officer Ike Lawrence Epstein felt it was natural for the company to team with the Gay & Lesbian Community Center of Southern Nevada to promote the Protect Yourself at all Times, campaign,” Iole reported.

Yes, that’s really the name of the campaign. We’ll get back to that in a moment.

According to the story, half of all new HIV cases in the last two years have been reported in people under the age of 30. The 18-34 demographic is certainly the UFC’s sweet spot so it makes a lot of sense for them to help out with awareness-building efforts.

The promotion partnering with organizations in the LBGTQ is also a great move. We always hear about the post-fight screenings that UFC fighters must take for PEDs and drugs of abuse, but they all also have to be tested for HIV, which gives spokespeople for the new campaign, including Forrest Griffin, a personal angle to talk about the issue:

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[VIDEO] Adam Carolla Gives Tito Ortiz a Boxing Lesson on The Adam Carolla Show

About three years before the Matt Hamill biopic of the same name came out, comedian Adam Carolla starred in a great little low budget, boxing-centric comedy called The Hammer. The film not only received positive reviews during its limited theatrical run, but more or less showcased a lot of the skills Carolla developed in his past life as boxing trainer (which is actually how he met Jimmy Kimmel and yadda yadda the rest is history…).

Nowadays, Carolla hosts the incredibly popular talk show/podcast, The Adam Carolla Show, and frequently brings on guests from the combat sports world. Rather than have these fighters demonstrate submission holds on him for a cheap laugh (not that there’s anything wrong with that), Carolla prefers to school them in the art of “the sweet science.” Having previously taught Urijah Faber a thing or two about proper striking technique, Carolla recently invited Tito Ortiz onto his program to hit some mits/plug his upcoming Bellator PPV fight with Quinton Jackson.

As much as I know you readers want me to use this opportunity to throw a lowball insult at Ortiz (it is, after all, what CP has been doing since day 1), I just can’t do it today. Sure, Ortiz seemed to be breathing a little heavy for a guy who is less than a month out from a fight, but Ortiz also seemed pretty willing to listen to Carolla’s advice, and given the former’s credentials compared to the latter’s, I respect him for it. Who knows? Maybe I’m entering a new, less cynical chapter of my life. Maybe…

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Velasquez vs. Dos Santos Mid-Week Update: Medical Suspensions, The Near-Stoppage That Wasn’t, And the Facial Deterioration GIF You’ve Been Waiting For [UPDATED]


(Take another look at the moment in round 3 when Herb Dean “almost stopped the fight.” It turns out he was just trying to yank Cain’s right hand off the fence. Good work, Herb. The fans paid for a five-round beating, and they deserve to get their money’s worth. / Props: Reddit_MMA)

The heavyweight war between Cain Velasquez and Junior Dos Santos at UFC 166 already feels like ancient history, but there are a bunch of related news items popping up this week that you should still be aware of. So let’s dump ‘em, shall we?

- UFC 166 medical suspensions are out, and JDS is suspended indefinitely pending clearance from an ear, nose and throat doctor. (Shawn Jordan and Tim Boetsch were also given indefinite suspensions due to the damage they took in their fights.) Velasquez is medically suspended through April 18th due to a possibly broken jaw, though he could return earlier pending clearance from a doctor. UPDATE: Cain’s team says his jaw is totally fine, and they have no idea why “possibly broken jaw” was listed on his medical suspension. It’s a mystery. The Texas Department of Licensing and Regulation has yet to issue a comment. UPDATE #2: According to a representative for the TDLR, ”After review of the UFC 166 information it has been determined the Velasquez/dos Santos suspensions were posted incorrectly.” Velasquez’s jaw is not broken, and his actual medical suspension is just 15 days.

- When Dos Santos was taken to the hospital after the event, the Brazilian striker admitted that he did not remember much of the fight, and was under the impression that he had been KO’d in the second round. Dos Santos also did not remember doing a post-fight interview with Joe Rogan after the match, which partially excuses how snippy he got with Joe in the beginning. (“He’s a true champion so I’m not?”)

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28-0 Featherweight Phenom Julio Cesar Neves Will Be Cartwheel-Kicking Dudes in Bellator Now


(Finally, we can use the terms “hot prospect” and “Bellator” in the same sentence without being sarcastic. / Photo via Sherdog)

At 19-and-a-half years old, Julio Cesar Neves Junior is off to the fastest start in MMA history. In just two years of professional competition, the Brazilian featherweight prodigy has compiled a 28-0 record, with 25 wins by stoppage. “Morceguinho” has already blown past the career-opening win streaks posted by Megumi Fujii (who won her first 22 fights) and Khabib Nurmagomedov (who’s won 21 and counting), and he’s within arm’s reach of the 32-fight win streak that Igor Vovchanchyn earned from 1996-1999 — to date the longest MMA win streak unbroken by draws or no-contests.

We first introduced you to Neves back in August, when he picked up his 26th win by Capoeira cartwheel-kicking the shit out of Dener Dos Santos. “We have a feeling this one will get him noticed by the big leagues,” we wrote…and indeed it has. MMAFighting informs us that Neves has just signed a contract with Bellator, and will make his promotional debut at an event to be named later.

Alright, so maybe Bellator isn’t the biggest of big leagues, but it’s a hell of an opportunity for a teenager from Santa Catarina. According to MMAFighting, Neves is the younger brother of Rafael “Morcego” Silva, who won Bellator’s 2013 Summer Series Bantamweight Tournament this year, and is riding an impressive 13-fight win streak himself. Can the Morcego/guinho brothers become the next Pitbull brothers? And how much longer will Neves’s win streak last now that he’ll be facing a higher level of competition?

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From Facepalm to Faceplant: The 8 Most Brutal Self-Inflicted Knockouts in MMA History


(“Accepts trilogy-completing title fight with biggest rival, points out where he will faceplant later.” Photo via Getty.) 

Although the fight records officially list Cain Velasquez‘s 5th round TKO of Junior Dos Santos at UFC 166 as coming by way of “Slam and Punch,” the credit should rightfully be given to Dos Santos for executing a picture perfect ninja-choke-into-faceplant KO. It was truly the most spectacular self-destruct sequence ever carried out in the octagon, and one that got us thinking: What are the Most Brutal Self-Inflicted KO’s in MMA History? 

Matt Lindland will be discussed at some point in this article.

Mark Kerr vs. Yoshihisa Yamamoto – PRIDE 27

As Ben previously noted, it’s a good thing that the 2002 Mark Kerr documentary, The Smashing Machine, ended when it did, because we wouldn’t have been able to sit through the tale of woe that Kerr’s career became from 2004 onward.

Following a pair of losses to Igor Vovchanchyn and Heath Herring at PRIDE 12 and 15, respectfully, Kerr would take a three year break from the sport before returning against Yoshihisa Yamamoto (who held a modest 13-16 record at the time) at PRIDE 27. Forty seconds into the fight, Kerr would knock himself out during a takedown attempt. He would walk away from PRIDE shortly thereafter and lose 7 out of his next 9 contests, all by first round stoppage.

This post has gotten off to an unexpectedly depressing start, but such is Mark Kerr. Let’s lighten things up a bit…

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Hot Potato: 12 Photos of Courtney Prather, Bellator’s New Ring Girl


(Photo via Iron Man Magazine)

After winning a ring-girl search put on by the fine gentlemen at TheChive, BSN-sponsored fitness competitor Courtney Prather has earned a spot as Bellator’s next ring girl, and will make her debut at Bellator 106: Rampage vs. Tito on November 2nd. The Southern California native is also a certified personal trainer and fitness educator who shares her knowledge on her lifestyle site fitnesslifeadventure.com. I’m going to take a wild guess and say she consumes less pizza than Jade Bryce.

Check out some great Courtney Prather photos in our gallery after the jump, learn more about her in the BSN profile video below, and follow her life on Twitter and Facebook.

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‘Bust’ No More: Hector Lombard Emerges as Instant Welterweight Title Contender Following Knockout Win at UFC 166


(While all those rubber-neckers and looky-loos stand slack-jawed starin’, the real men have the nuts to walk away. / Photo via Getty)

By Adam Martin

Don’t call it a comeback.

At UFC 166 this past weekend, Hector Lombard — he of the disappointing 1-2 Octagon record in his first year with the organization — made his 170-pound debut after nine years as a middleweight, and it was a good one, as he absolutely obliterated former Strikeforce welterweight champion Nate Marquardt with brutal left hooks in under two minutes to save his job with the UFC.

According to Lombard, the UFC told him “take it or leave it” in regards to a potential drop to 170, meaning he could either make the move down to welterweight or get his walking papers after putting together a losing record as a UFC middleweight.

After all, the former Bellator middleweight champion was a huge signing for the UFC last summer, but after losing two disappointing split decisions to Tim Boetsch and Yushin Okami (with a KO win over Rousimar Palhares sandwiched in between), it was clear that “Lightning” was too small to compete with the bigger 185-pounders in the Octagon.

So Dana White and Joe Silva told Lombard to make the cut to 170, and if last Saturday night in Houston was any indication, this man is going to be an absolute force to be reckoned with in the UFC welterweight division.

In fact, I would even go as far as to say he’s an instant title contender.

Sure, a win over Marquardt these days doesn’t mean as much as it used to. After all, “The Great” has gone 0-3 in 2013, including a previous KO loss to Jake Ellenberger and a decision loss to Tarec Saffiedine. But still, he’s a former Pancrase/Strikeforce champion, a former top-three ranked middleweight, and a huge name in the sport.

So while a KO win over Marquardt in 2013 isn’t as special as it may have been three years ago — hell, even one year ago, when he was wrecking Tyron Woodley’s brains in Strikeforce — it’s still a good win on paper, and it’s the type of victory that will put Lombard on the fast track to a title shot at 170 pounds, if mostly because of his combination of muscles and hefty price tag.

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Report: Tatsuya Kawajiri Signs With the UFC, Hoping to Make Debut at January Singapore Event


(Tatsuya Kawajiri highlight via Kid Milly. The video says “Fight, Billy, fight!” but the music says “Dance, Billy, dance!”)

Some moderately interesting news out of Japan today (no, not the countries newfound enthusiasm for abstinence), as it is being reported that former Strikeforce title challenger Tatsuya Kawajiri has signed with the UFC.

Currently riding a five fight win streak (with four finishes) and sporting an overall record of 32-7-2, Kawajiri has long been considered one of the greatest Asian lighterweight fighters currently competing today. With victories over Joachim Hansen, Yves Edwards, Josh Thomson, Gesias Cavalcante and Krazy Horse to his credit, it seemed as if a call up to the UFC was inevitable for the former Shooto champion.

Although Kawajiri’s signing has yet to be confirmed by the UFC, sources close to “Crusher” told MMAJunkie that Kawajiri is hoping to make his promotional debut on the UFC’s inaugural Singapore-based card, “Fight Night 34,” in January. Given that Kawajiri’s only stateside appearance resulted in an annihilation via elbows to Gilbert Melendez in their Strikeforce lightweight title fight at Strikeforce: Diaz vs Daley, we can’t really argue with his logic.

We will have more on Kawajiri’s signing as details are made available.

-J. Jones

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