Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

April, 2014

Dana White Calls Cris Cyborg “Wanderlei Silva in a Dress,” Is the Absolute Worst

Earlier this week, Ronda Rousey forged ahead in her war of words with Cris Cyborg, calling the former Strikeforce champ an “it” and earning the ire of MMA apparel brand Americana in the process. While most of us likely assumed that Rousey would not be punished for her remarks — unlike Matt Mitrione, who made similarly unprofessional comments about Fallon Fox in the past and was suspended as a result — we couldn’t have possibly foreseen that White would not only support Rousey’s claims, but pile on Cyborg as well, could we?

HAHAHAHA, I know right? I could barely make it through that sentence myself. Dana White is and has always been an jackass with zero impulse control, so obviously, he used yesterday’s UFC 172 media day as an opportunity to hurl misogynistic insults Cyborg’s way like the professional that he is.

“When I saw her at the MMA awards, she looked like Wanderlei Silva in a dress and heels,” said White while his media cronies giggled in the background like a bunch of middle schoolers. I can’t blame them; they probably would’ve had their credentials pulled if they didn’t treat White like a Don from a 50′s gangster movie. “Wanderlei Silva in a dress, dats a good one, boss!”

But it was when White actually attempted to defend Rousey’s comments that the real standup act began…

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Dan Henderson vs. Daniel Cormier, And the UFC’s Tradition of Sacrificing Its Legends


(Photo by Esther Lin for MMAFighting)

By Bear Siragusa

Allow me to paint you a picture:

He shuffles forward on stiff legs, his arms occasionally jabbing out in slow, tired fashion. There is a man standing across the cage who advances and strikes him. A blow to the head. He staggers, but still shuffles forward, like something undead. Twice more he is struck in the head. With the third blow he goes stiff, like a corpse already in the grip of rigor mortis. He topples backwards like a stricken tree, to lay rigid and unmoving.

Sound familiar? Well, it should. It was the main event of UFC Fight Night in Abu Dhabi between Roy Nelson and Antônio Rodrigo Nogueira. (Watch the carnage here.) It was a fight that, bottom line, shouldn’t have happened. Nogueira has suffered the most knockdowns (8) in UFC heavyweight history, and his previous knockout losses to Frank Mir and Cain Velasquez proved that Big Nog’s formerly armor-plated chin was becoming vulnerable. So why put him in the Octagon with one of the most devastating right hands in the UFC?

This kind of thing has become common in MMA.

MMA promotions have made it a habit to put beaten and tired legends of the sport in fights that they can’t hope to win. Look no further than Nelson vs. Nogueira, Overeem vs. Mir, Cro Cop vs. Mir/Schaub/Nelson. The UFC assumes that fans want to see these fights, but really, only a certain kind of fan wants to see these fights — the same fans who would gladly watch George Foreman and Muhammad Ali go at it again. One more time. For old times’ sake.

Which brings us to the scheduled UFC 173 bout in May between Dan Henderson and Daniel Cormier.

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Andrei Arlovski Re-Signs With UFC, June Bout Against Brendan Schaub Reportedly in the Works [UPDATED]


(To answer your questions, you can buy it here, and it also comes in shark. / Photo via Andrei’s Instagram)

After a six-year absence from the promotion, former UFC heavyweight champion Andrei Arlovski will be returning to the Octagon this year. UFC president Dana White confirmed Arlovski’s signing on Twitter yesterday, and MMAJunkie reports that a bout between Arlovski and Brendan Schaub is being targeted for UFC 174 (June 14th; Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada). UPDATE: Arlovski vs. Schaub is official, and Schaub is pretty psyched about it.

Though Arlovski endured a rough patch in 2009-2011 where he lost four consecutive fights — marked by knockout losses to Fedor Emelianenko, Brett Rogers, and Sergei Kharitonov — the “Pitbull” actually ended his first UFC stint on a three-fight win streak, including a decision victory against current heavyweight title contender Fabricio Werdum and TKO’s of Marcio Cruz and Jake O’Brien. His departure was contract-related (and immediately profitable), and since then, Dana White has always been highly complimentary of Arlovski as a fighter and as a person, even while criticizing his career choices.

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It Looks Like We Won’t Be Seeing Cain Velasquez in the Octagon Anytime Soon


(Get comfortable, champ. You’re gonna be there a while. Via Cain’s Instagram.)

Heavyweight champion Cain Velasquez is kind of like Santa Claus, in that he only comes around once a year and delivers presents, if you will, in the form of vicious beatings for our entertainment. We haven’t seen Cain in the octagon since his October 2013 title defense over Junior Dos Santos in their trilogy match at UFC 166, but following a successful shoulder surgery in December, it was believed that Velasquez would back in action by late 2014.

Well kids, it looks like Christmas is cancelled this year, as other lingering injuries and a possible coaching gig on The Ultimate Fighter: Latin America may keep Velasquez sidelined until 2015. Yep, 2015. Said Ariel Helwani on last night’s edition of UFC Tonight:

I spoke to his wrestling coach and he told me that Cain’s doctor cleared him to use his right hand in training two weeks ago, but he’s not sure if Cain’s ready to use the left hand yet. He’s not sure if he’ll be ready by November. He said he won’t rush into the fight that’s targeted for then. He won’t fight until he’s 100 percent. There’s talk of Cain coaching The Ultimate Fighter Latin America, and the UFC has approached him about it, and they could film it in May in Las Vegas. It would be a likely scenario that he’d coach against Werdum now.

God. Damn. It.

So not only do we have to wait for Anthony Pettis to run the TUF gauntlet before we see him fight again, but now Velasquez is being put on the back burner? And to coach the international version of a notoriously cursed show as far as coaches go?

CagePotato Ban: Placing entire divisions on hold for a goddamn reality show. Or not stripping a champion of his/her belt after a year of inactivity. Either or.

-J. Jones

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Jon Jones Changes Story About Homophobic ‘Hacked Phone’ Incident


(Suddenly, the “Bones Knows” cell phone case has become the greatest MMA gag-gift of the year. Buy it here on eBay.)

Last week, Jon Jones lost his phone, a mysterious homophobic hacker found it, and then proceeded to fire gay slurs at a Swedish teenager on Instagram under Jones’s identity. At least, that’s the story Jones and his manager Malki Kawa tried to feed us. It seemed fishy from the beginning, and it probably doesn’t help that Jones has now decided to edit his story a little bit.

As Jones claims in a new interview with Newsday‘s Mark LaMonica, a member of Jones’s social media team sent the messages from his account, possibly unwittingly, and this all happened while Jones was in fact trying to get a new phone, because he lost his old one, though that had nothing to do with the alleged “hack.” Got it? From the Newsday article:

Jones said he was at the store that day getting a new phone, and Kawa couldn’t reach him. Kawa said that when he finally did get through to Jones, he asked Jones if he wrote the offensive comments. Jones had no idea what Kawa was even talking about, he said. Kawa then sent Jones screengrabs of what had been posted to his Instagram account…

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The Bellator Pay-Per-View vs. UFC 173: Which Card is Actually Worth Your Money? [POLL]


(“Sorry bro, it was either rent or Fight Pass. Easiest decision I’ve ever made.”)

As a couple of you readers noted after taking a gander over the recently updated UFC 173 lineup, the card is somewhat lacking in big fights department to warrant it’s $54.95 price. You could even go so far as to call it garbage-ass (I wouldn’t necessarily agree, but I’d die to defend your right to say it). In any case, several television providers similarly unveiled the price of Bellator’s upcoming pay-per-view earlier today, and at $39.95 for standard definition/$44.99 for HD, the Internet’s reaction has been critical to put it lightly. I know, I’m as shocked as you are.

While there are surely a few fights of merit on each card (read Seth’s breakdown of Bellator 120 here), both UFC 173 and the Bellator PPV are hard sells to even the most hardcore of MMA fans at their current prices. The question is: Which card would you actually consider paying for? 

Vote in our poll after the jump, then make your case/air your grievances for either card in the comments section.

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Hermes Franca Deported to Brazil After Serving Sentence for Sexual Abuse

Back in May 2011, UFC veteran Hermes Franca was arrested and charged with seven counts of sexual abuse in the first degree and two counts of unlawful sexual penetration in the second degree, after allegedly molesting one of his own jiu-jitsu students, who was under the age of 14. After posting a vague letter on the UG in which he claimed that his party lifestyle had led him to “failing as a husband, a father, a dreamer,” Franca pleaded guilty to one count of unlawful penetration and one count of first-degree sexual abuse, and was sentenced to 42 months in prison in January 2012.

After serving a little over two years of his sentence in Oregon, Franca was released from prison last month and immediately handed over to Immigration and Customs Enforcement custody. Though Franca had been a lawful permanent resident of the U.S. since 2007, an immigration judge ruled on March 19th that Franca should be removed from the country. On Tuesday, Franca was escorted back to Brazil on a commercial flight, accompanied by a federal official.

Franca’s original sentence included four-and-a-half years of post-prison supervision, and the requirement to register as a sex offender. Being expelled from America gets him off the hook for that stuff, but the good news is, his career is over, he’ll be treated as a social pariah for the rest of his life, and we’ll never have to look at his stupid goddamned hair again.

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SportsPotato: Josh McRoberts TKO’s LeBron James via Flying Elbow


(Props: watchnba201415 via Deadspin)

Near the end of last night’s NBA playoff game between the Miami Heat and the Charlotte Bobcats, Josh McRoberts hit LeBron James with a beautiful jumping elbow, sending James crashing to the court in apparent agony. In the NBA, that’s worthy of a flagrant foul. In the UFC, McRoberts would be pocketing $50,000 for Performance of the Night. The Heat hung on to victory, and are up 2-0 in their series against Charlotte.

Previously on SportsPotato…
- Power Play: Five MMA Techniques That Hockey Players Should Learn
- MMA/Wrestling Body Slams in Football Are So Hot Right Now
- Wild Badminton Brawl at the Canada Open
- Pedro Martinez vs. Don Zimmer, Obviously

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Dan Henderson vs. Daniel Cormier Officially Booked as UFC 173 Co-Main Event in May


(Cormier opens a can of whoop ass on Phil Cumens…er…Paul Cummings…let’s just call him “Pete” at UFC 170. Photo via Getty.)

Although the fight was originally being targeted for UFC 175 on 4th of July weekend, Dana White broke the news on Sportscenter earlier today that the light heavyweight #1ish contender match between Daniel Cormier and Dan Henderson has officially been booked as the co-main event of UFC 173: Weidman vs. Belfort vs. Machida Barao vs. Dillashaw, which transpires on May 24th from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas.

The fight will serve as a quick turnaround for Henderson, who was getting his ass handed to him by Mauricio Rua at Fight Night 38 in March before scoring a miracle comeback KO via H-Bomb in the third round of their hotly-anticipated rematch. Cormier, on the other hand, barely broke a sweat in his last fight: a 79-second TKO over Pete Cumpins…Pat Culmings (damn it, so close!) at UFC 170.

Recovery advantage: Cormier. Age, speed, size, and strength advantage: Also Cormier. “You darn kids quit skateboarding on the sidewalks!” advantage: Hendo. Call me crazy, but I’m liking Hendo here.

The full UFC 173 lineup is after the jump.

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Old Man Liddell Thinks He Could Have KO’d Jon Jones in His Prime, And Doesn’t Like the Way Chael Sonnen Sells Fights


(“These damn kids with their sagging pants and exposed mid-riffs. Good luck getting a job, you punk!”)

Because this weekend’s UFC 172 title fight between Jon Jones and Glover Teixeira isn’t quite interesting enough to discuss, FOX Sports’s Marc Raimondi decided to ask Teixeira’s longtime training partner Chuck Liddell how he would have done against Jones, back when he was in his prime. Chuck’s answer is both eye-rollingly delusional and totally unsurprising:

Liddell loves Jones’ overall game, but is not at all impressed with his punching power. He thinks if the two would have fought in his prime, he would have knocked Jones out.

I think I would have been a horrible matchup for him,” Liddell told FOX Sports. “I would have walked through his punches and he wouldn’t have caught me with anything…I would have found a way to hit him,” Liddell said, “and I hit too hard.

The “walked through his punches” part is my favorite; it’s just so Leben-esque. There’s a lot more I can say here, but our own Matt Saccaro beat me to it:

Those are the only correct responses. If you believe otherwise, you’re stuck in a fanboy time-warp. And Chuck? Please don’t turn into Royce Gracie. We’re begging you.

Speaking of the Iceman crapping on current UFC stars, Liddell also took some time to diss Chael Sonnen’s self-promotion routine:

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