Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

April, 2014

Must-See: This Female Slugfest From KCFA 10 Is So Bad It’s Good


(Props: KCFightingAlliance via MiddleEasy)

I don’t know if this is a sexist statement to make or whatever, but the great thing about amateur women’s MMA is that the fighters never, ever block punches. Sometimes, that can be really sad. But when the fighters are both awful evenly matched, it can be magical.

On Saturday night, amateur MMA fighter Jade Chun (the girl in the pink top) competed at Kansas City Fighting Alliance 10 against Taeler Jackson, and what Jade lacked in basic understanding of the striking arts, she made up for in heart, determination, and straight-up balls. For the first 20 seconds, the fight just looks like any other slugfest between two rookies with nothing to lose. Then, Jade’s like, “Screw it, I’m just going to throw standing hammerfists for the rest of the fight and see what happens.” She also starts using what I can only describe as “the imaginary shield defense.” It is glorious.

Eventually, Chun gets her lip split wide open by the marginally more competent punches coming from Jackson. Chun spits her own blood — angry, like Bruce Lee — and applies more and more pressure, and fires uglier and uglier punch-like-thingys, until Jackson is KO’d in a heap against the fence. The fight is a true underdog story, played out in less than five minutes. It’s probably the worst thing you’ll see today, but in a weird way, it might be the most inspiring. We are all Jade Chun, just plugging away, trying our best to succeed despite our total lack of ability. Sometimes tough is enough.

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Ronda Rousey Calls Cris Cyborg an “It,” Receives $5,000 Bounty on Her Head


(“Come at me, brahs.” Photo via Getty.)

With a fight lined up against savvy veteran Alexis Davis in May and a seemingly inevitable showdown with Gina Carano on the horizon, one would think that Ronda Rousey has plenty on her plate to keep her distracted from her never-ending war of words with Cris Cyborg. Then again, if we’ve learned one thing about Ms. Rousey over the years, it’s that the only thing she loves more than breaking people’s arms is talking shit about people whose arms she has yet to break (ex. Kardashian, K. and Caraway, B.). Women be talkin’, amiright fellas?

So perhaps it makes sense that, during an interview with Yahoo’s Kevin Iole, Rousey only briefly touched on the fights she actually has lined up before once again unleashing a barrage of insults at the former Strikeforce featherweight champion like the classy, grown-up professional that she is:

I’ve said before, I don’t care if she’s injecting horse semen into her eyeballs, I’ll fight her, but that’s just my personal decision. But I can’t make a decision for the whole division. I can’t say it’s the right thing. This girl has been on steroids for so long and [has been] injecting herself for so long that she’s not even a woman anymore. She’s an ‘it.’ It’s not good for the women’s division. It’s not good at all.

While an “it” isn’t exactly the worst burn Rousey has ever thrown Cyborg’s way, the insult was enough to earn the ire of MMA apparel brand Americana, who threw down the following gauntlet on Twitter last night…

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UFC on FOX 11 Fight Video Highlights: Werdum vs. Browne, Cerrone vs. Barboza + More


(Fabricio Werdum vs. Travis Browne highlights. All vids via YouTube.com/FOXSports)


(Donald Cerrone vs. Edson Barboza highlights)

In case you missed it on Saturday night, here are some video highlights from the UFC on FOX 11 main card, featuring Fabricio Werdum’s unexpected standup-thrashing of Travis Browne, and Donald Cerrone’s comeback submission victory over Edson Barboza. A couple of important notes…

- Cerrone picked up a $50,000 Performance of the Night bonus for his win over Barboza; Cowboy has now bonus’d in three consecutive fights. All the other UFC on FOX 11 bonuses went to prelim fighters. Thiago Alves and Seth Baczynski won Fight of the Night for their three-rounder which Alves won by unanimous decision, and Performance of the Night #2 went to UFC newcomer Alex White — who was previously involved in the ugliest late-stoppage in MMA history — for his first-round TKO of Estevan Payan.

- At the post-event press conference, Dana White mentioned that Travis Browne suffered a broken hand and possibly broken rib during his fight against Werdum, and Browne’s wrestling coach Ricky Lundell released an x-ray of Hapa’s broken hand after the fight. For some reason, the official UFC on FOX 11 medical suspensions list mentions a broken nose for Browne but not a broken hand. Whatever. The point is, he got pretty messed up.

After the jump: Highlights from Miesha Tate vs. Liz Carmouche and Yoel Romero vs. Brad Tavares. Plus, Dana White (mostly) praises Werdum’s performance in the main event while burying Browne for gassing out early, and Shaquille O’Neal eats a napkin for some reason.

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Is It Time to Admit MMA Will Never Become a Mainstream Success?


(Dana White’s “If you don’t like it, we don’t want you as a fan” strategy has worked. / Photo via Getty)

By Matt Saccaro

UFC on FOX 11 was one of the better cards in recent memory, but nobody outside of the MMA bubble cared.

It pulled in only 1.98 million viewers—the lowest ever for a UFC event on Fox and a 27% decline from UFC on FOX 10. The fight card lost out to every other major network in total viewers, and only beat CBS in the key 18-49 demo.

“Fighting is in our DNA,” Dana White likes to maintain. It’s a universal action that everyone understands. If a fight breaks out, everyone stops what they’re doing to watch it. Fighting is raw, visceral, but somehow pure and sacrosanct. It has been part of humanity since the first caveman shot a double leg.

Except it’s not. Those lines we all swore were so true when we started watching MMA, the ones we cited as reasons for MMA’s inevitable (and rightful) ascent to greatness, are all bullshit. When a rerun of Mike and Molly draws more viewers than free fights, one has to question whether MMA will ever achieve the mainstream popularity fans and pundits have been anticipating for years now—unless an overweight Chicago police officer (no, not Mike Russow) and his wife are even more in our DNA than fighting.

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UFC on FOX 11: Werdum Batters Browne, Will Meet Velasquez in Mexico


(Fabricio Werdum: Nice guy before the fight, total son-of-a-bitch during the fight. / Photo by Esther Lin for MMAFighting)

UFC on FOX 11 is underway at the Amway Center in Orlando, headlined by a heavyweight bout between crafty Brazilian veteran Fabricio Werdum and bearded knockout machine Travis Browne. (Winner gets a free trip to Mexico!) Plus: Donald Cerrone vs. Edson Barboza in a guaranteed barnburner at lightweight, and a compelling middeweight matchup between the streaking Brad Tavares and cannonball-like Cuban wrestler Yoel Romero. It’s stacked, free, and arranged for maximum entertainment value.*

After a long hiatus, liveblogger-supreme Anthony Gannon has returned to handle round-by-round results for the FOX main card of “Werdum vs. Browne,” which you can find after the jump beginning at 8 p.m. ET / 5 p.m. PT. Refresh the page every few minutes for all the latest updates, and shoot us your thoughts in the comments section or on twitter @cagepotatomma.

* Except for the Miesha Tate vs. Liz Carmouche fight, which could be decent, I guess, but I still don’t see how it made the main card lineup over Khabib Nurmagomedov vs. Rafael Dos Anjos. I mean, come on. Seriously? The ladies have a collective UFC record of 1-4. Meanwhile, Dos Anjos has won five straight, and Nurmy is 21-0 overall, not including unsanctioned youth fights against half-sedated bear cubs.

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Random News Alert: Rich Franklin In Talks to Become ONE FC Vice President


(We probably could’ve used a better picture. / Photo via Getty)

Here’s the latest in headlines you’d never expect: Former UFC champ Rich Franklin is apparently in talks with ONE FC to become its vice president. Rich Franklin reported the news this morning on his Facebook page, saying the following:

I have been in talks with ONE FC about taking a job with them. They offered me a position as VP. I will be heading to ONE FC headquarters in the next few weeks to work out the details. I met with Dana and Lorenzo at the end of last year and they gave me their blessing. I will keep you posted.

As MMA Junkie reported, Franklin still has a fight on his UFC contract and stated that he wanted to fulfill his obligations. Taking a desk job with another MMA promotion almost definitely means that his fighting days are done.

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Martial Arts Fail of the Week: This Makes Point Fighting Look Like Frye-Takayama

Remember last week’s Martial Arts Fail–the one with the worst karate demo known to man?

This week, we have a follow-up to that video in the form of a sparring match between two black belts from what appears to be the same school. That’s right, a sleuthing member of Reddit unearthed the dojo’s identity. Apparently, this Taekwondo McDojo is called the World Martial Arts Association and is headquartered in Brooklyn. If the words of an anonymous Redditor who claims to have once been a student can be believed, they charge $40 a class, and $600 per belt test. Here’s the full thread on Reddit, in case you’re interested in this sort of thing.

The funniest (or saddest) part, however, isn’t on Reddit or YouTube, but on the school’s own website…

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Bellator 117 Results: Lima Batters Hawn’s Leg to Become Bellator Welterweight Champion

Bellator crowned a new welterweight champion at Bellator 117, and also determined who’d fight in the finals of the season 10 lightweight tournament. In case you missed the fisticuffs, here’s our recap:

Patricky “Pitbull” Freire vs. Derek Campos

This lightweight tournament semifinal started with some feeling out. A flying knee from Pitbull missed its mark, as did a spinning back kick from Campos. Midway through the round, Pitbull landed a sick hook to the liver followed up by a hook to the head–easily the best combo of the round at that point. Shortly after this, a brawl ensued against the cage. Campos landed some jabs, Freire landed a knee and a right hand. They reset, but then Campos pressured Freire again, landing quite a few shots. Campos’ success continued until the end of the first round; he started to get the better of every exchange while Pitbull looked slow and uninterested.

Campos’ luck ran out in the second round. Pitbull tagged him with a nasty right hand that floored him. Campos managed to rise to his feet only to be floored yet again. Pitbull mounted him and finished him with ground and pound when Campos rolled over onto his stomach and covered up. What a comeback.

Freire will be fighting the winner of Marcin Held vs. Derek Anderson in the lightweight tournament finals.

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Friday Link Dump: Fighters Who Hung On Too Long, The Haters’ Guide to UFC on FOX 11, Embarrassing Ankle-Breaker Gifs + More


(Today’s UFC on FOX 11: Browne vs. Werdum weigh-ins via the UFC’s Youtube channel)

One Does Not Simply Go to the Ground With Imanari  (CagePotato.tumblr)

The Short List: Fighters Who Hung On Too Long (MMAJunkie)

What Has the Media Done With Vitor Belfort? (MMAFighting)

The Haters’ Guide to UFC on Fox 11 (BloodyElbow)

Travis Browne and the 5 Most Exciting Heavyweights in the UFC (Bleacher Report)

21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard (PopHangover)

Babes of Yore: Sexy Actresses in Their 40s and 50s Who Still Got It (HolyTaco)

Former Knick Larry Hughes Questioned in Sexual Assault Investigation (EveryJoe)

The Most Embarrassing Ankle-Breakers of the 2013-14 NBA Season in GIFs (Complex)

The Ultimate Public Access TV Pranks Compilation (WorldWideInterweb)

The History of Easter Eggs (Escapist)

The Full ‘Rover’ Trailer Has More Sweat, Dirt, And Gunplay. Yes, Please. (FilmDrunk)

The 50 Best Sci-Fi and Fantasy Movies of All Time (HiConsumption)

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[VIDEO] Marlon Wayans Fantasizes About Ronda Rousey on Conan, Continues to Be Unfunny


(Skip to the 2:50 mark to see what we’re talking about.)

Every time I hear that Marlon Wayans has another fart-joke-disguised-as-a-movie coming out, I have to remind myself that this is the man who wrote/starred in Don’t Be a Menace and Scary Movie or I’d probably walk into oncoming traffic. I mean, sure, Wayans has been relentlessly eroding our cultural understanding of things like “satire” and “parody” for over a decade now, but it’s hard to blame him when you realize how much money he is making to do so. Despite appearing to be a talentless hack like myself on the outside, Wayans is probably still a generally funny guy (unlike myself) on the inside, right?

Well, his recent appearance on Conan would seem to suggest otherwise. Apparently a big fan of our fair sport, Wayans recently appeared on Conan to promote his latest effort, Ghost Fart 2, and the topic eventually shifted to a tweet he had sent out about another Conan alum, women’s bantamweight champion Ronda Rousey. “This is hot!! Girl on girl! #ufc @ufc @rondaroussey I just wanna smell her training gloves and feet wraps…” wrote Wayans during Rousey’s staredown with Sara McMann, which the UFC bizarrely chose to retweet because hey! A sort-of famous person acknowledged us!

In any case, Conan called out Wayans for his tweet, and Wayans proceeded to discuss his fantasy of having Rousey armbar his penis. It was the kind of joke you’d expect from the guy who honestly thought White Chicks was a funny enough premise to run with for 90 minutes, and I fully expect either Rousey or Dana White to respond negatively to it in the coming days.

I apologize for wasting your time.

-J. Jones 

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