Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

September, 2014

“Double-KO to the Nuts in a Christian Fight” Delivers Exactly What It Promises


(God smites them down at the 1:03 mark.)

The greatest YouTube title of the day goes to “Double-KO to the Nuts in a Christian Fight,” which is actually a clip from that Fight Church documentary that you probably never watched. MiddleEasy passed this along yesterday evening, and if you want to see a double-knockout via simultaneous low blows in a Muay Thai fight held at a place of worship, this is the best video for you, at this particular moment.

Short version: The guy in red trunks knees the balls of the guy in black trunks, who lands an uppercut (!) to the junk of the guy in red trunks at the same time, and then they pray about it. Not bad, but I feel like both of these guys would get murdered by Benny “Hurricane” Hinn.

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VIDEO: Randy Couture’s Seductive Foxtrot on ‘Dancing With the Stars’


(Props: The DWTS YouTube channel)

UFC Hall of Famer Randy Couture made his ballroom debut last night on Dancing With the Stars Season 19, and completely BEASTED it. Couture’s foxtrot with Karina Smirnoff was good enough to earn a score of 31 from the judges, placing him at a very respectable sixth place out of the 13 contestants. Obviously, Alfonso Ribeiro landed in first place with a score of 36. On the other hand, Julianne Hough said Randy was “making [her] randy,” which is more valuable than any number on a scorecard.

Watch Randy Couture’s complete dance performance above, and if you have any good captions for the photo below, shoot ‘em to us in the comments or on twitter.

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Video: Comedian Russell Peters Says the UFC ‘Will Play Itself Out’ Due to Oversaturation


(Props: @JayRussellMMA)

Standup comedy superstar and Last Comic Standing judge Russell Peters went on SiriusXM’s Todd Shapiro Show last week, and spent a minute discussing his love of boxing and MMA. As Peters sees it, boxing is about to enjoy a resurgence, but the UFC brand is struggling due to oversaturation. I mean, we’ve been saying the same thing about UFC oversaturation since 2012, but we’re just a bunch of keyboard warriors and haters, right? Russell Peters is a guy who’s actually done something with his life. Here’s what he had to say:

I always said the UFC will play itself out, they’ll oversaturate the market and they’ll lose their event status. And that’s what’s happening lately. They’ve got a lot of cards on, but you don’t know what you’re watching. Am I watching an old fight, a rerun? Is this UFC, is this TUF, is this Fight Night? I don’t know, they’ve changed it all, they’ve given it all these different titles, so you don’t know what you’re watching anymore…[it's on] every night, and you don’t if it’s old, new, live, taped. You don’t know anymore.

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Xyience Sold to Big Red, Will No Longer Be an Official UFC Sponsor


(“This is Xyience 101″…holy crap, that is still hilarious to me.)

Xyience — the sports nutrition and energy drink company that has been a prominent sponsor of the UFC since 2006 — has been sold to beverage company Big Red Ltd., according to MMAPayout. Though Big Red will continue to seek out the sports demographic for advertising Xyience and its energy drink brand Xenergy, the company has decided to end Xyience’s sponsorship of the UFC.

In an interview with BevNet, Big Red CEO Gary Smith explained that the decision was made as part of a new strategy that will see Xyience target a broader range of health-conscious consumers, like Crossfitters and marathoners. “I’m just gonna soften it up a little bit,” Smith said. “Make it a little less hardcore than the image that it’s got today.”

I’m no marketing genius, but let me explain something, Gary: This guy buys energy drinks; this guy does not. These guys buy energy drinks; these women do not. I’m tellin’ you bro, throw all your advertising dollars at meatheads and gay club kids.

According to BevNet, Xyience is by far the largest brand that Big Red has acquired, with approximately $45 million in annual sales, not incuding “vendors like gymnasiums and GNC- and Vitamin Shoppe-type stores, where it has claimed robust growth.”

The brand also carries some unfortunate baggage…

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TUF 20 Debut Pulls In 536k Viewers For Worst Premiere Ratings in Show’s History


(“Beauty might be skin deep, but so are our viewers.”) 

If you were overcome with a sudden feeling of deja vu while reading that headline, you’re not alone. We’ve written some variation of it at least three times now — once for the TUF 16 premiere, again for the TUF 18 premiere, and probably once for TUF 19, but we don’t care enough to look it up — with the only variant between them being the perpetually-descending number of viewers tuning in each season. But yes, the numbers are in, and with 536,000 viewers, TUF 20: Easy on the Eyes, Hard on the Face has shattered the record for the lowest viewed season premiere in the show’s history. I guess we should have seen this coming.

I don’t mean to make some overarching statement about the state of WMMA here, but this can’t be a good sign for the popularity of the women’s strawweight division. Between the social media campaign, the PR tour, the red carpet premiere, and the blatantly sexualized marketing campaign that was put together for this show, it was safe to say that the UFC had a lot riding on TUF 20. Expectations were high, and the season premiere bombed. Hard. Like, the Jacksonville Jaguars’ offensive line hard.

The craziest thing about all this? The TUF 20 premiere was actually good. The brackets, the attention to the fighters backstories, the massive upset that was Torres vs. Marcos — it was a top notch episode from production to pacing. While the dwindling quality of seasons past has been rightfully reflected by its viewership (or flat out discussed on the show itself), TUF 20 is the first season in the show’s history to crown a champion at its conclusion. It had stakes, dynamic participants, all of the stuff that reminds us what a compelling show TUF can be. Yet no one fucking watched it.

I’m not sure what there is to take away from TUF 20‘s abysmal numbers, really, other than the fact that FS1 will likely never be a comparable platform for delivering MMA content to Spike TV. But be honest, how many of you actually tuned in for last week’s premiere?

-J. Jones

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Broken Limbs Were So Hot This Weekend [GIFs]


(Props: ZombieProphet)

Following in the footsteps of Anderson Silva, Marcos Souza, and Magomed Malikov, a New Mexico-based bantamweight named Adrian “Killa” Cruz shattered his leg during a fight at RFA 18 on Friday night. As usual, it happened while Cruz was throwing a leg kick, which was checked by his opponent Justin Mitchell Linn. And while Cruz’s fracture ranks relatively low on the gnarliness scale, it’s kind of insane that this is at least the fourth time this has happened in the last nine months. Drink your milk, people.

After the jump: Sidemar Honorio kicks Matt Lozano’s arm in half at World Series of Fighting 13 on Saturday.

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Oscar Bait: ‘Brokeback Mounch’, Starring Renato Laranja and Josh Barnett [VIDEO]


(Props: Flixpoint TV)

After doing a surprisingly solid Robert De Niro impression in his Heat parody with Kenny Florian, 27-time Jiu-Jitsu World Champion Renato Laranja further flexes his dramatic chops in “Brokeback Mounch,” which kicks off the latest episode of the Renato Laranja Show. Laranja’s co-star this time is Josh Barnett, aka the heavyweight Heath Ledger. The sexual tension is unbearable. Start your week off the right way and give it a look. (There’s also a long interview with Chris Leben afterwards, if you’re interested. Laranja starts the segment by congratulating Leben for being an inspiration to cripples everywhere. I LOL’d.)

Related: The Renato Laranja Rocky III parody — “Hocky III,” obviously — with Cris Cyborg as Adrian. Yeah, like you’re not gonna click on that.

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The UFC Is Making the Same Mistakes The NFL Has Made Regarding Domestic Violence

By Seth Falvo

Watching Dana White’s recent appearance on “Fox Sports Live” paints a very clear picture: Dana White does not want you to compare him to NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell.

“I can tell you this, I wouldn’t want to be Roger Goodell,” White says, after being asked about his reaction to the video of Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice knocking out then-fiancee Janay Palmer. No surprises there, given that the NFL is in the middle of a domestic violence crisis built on the foundation of years of denial and reframing the issue. What is surprising is that he follows up his statement by resorting to the same strategies that the NFL employed to downplay Ray Rice’s assault in order to justify the UFC’s decision to resign Thiago Silva.

You don’t even have to wait for the parallels between how the UFC is choosing to handle Thiago Silva and how the NFL has attempted to cover up domestic violence to become apparent, they’re observable in the very first sentence White speaks once Silva’s name comes up:

“If you believe in the legal process, they came, they arrested him, and he wasn’t brought up on any charges.”

Let’s take a look at the actual documents detailing why the prosecutors decided to drop the charges against Thiago Silva

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Christy Mack Discusses Her Condition and Posts Photos of Her Healing Face


(Mack at a gala supporting victims of domestic abuse. / Photo via Getty)

There’s rarely any “good” news when discussing domestic violence. There’s only varying shades of terrible.

Today, we have a story that’s the least horrible thing we’ve had to write about the War Machine/Christy Mack saga. Mack posted an update on her Twitter account, explaining that she’s still in as rough shape as anyone could expect after being nearly killed, but is in much higher spirits and is starting to feel like herself again.

Get the full text of her update after the jump.

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VIDEO: Andrei Arlovski Knocks Out Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva at UFC Fight Night 51

Here’s the absolutely savage finish of tonight’s UFC Fight Night 51 main event, in which Andrei Arlovski floored Antonio Silva with a right hand, dropped some of the nastiest hammerfists in MMA history on Bigfoot’s poor noggin, then did a little shimmy-shake to celebrate.

The performance was a hell of a step up from Arlovski’s snoozer against Brendan Schaub at UFC 174 in June. Do we need to start taking the Pitbull seriously as a UFC heavyweight contender again? And who would you like to see him fight next?

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