Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

January, 2015

Uriah Hall Loses Another Opponent, Now Fighting Some Dude Called “The Choir Boy” at Fight Night 59


(Who’s got two shaka brahs and a trip to the emergency room scheduled for this weekend? THIS GUY!)

When the UFC made it’s long-awaited return to Boston in August of 2013, it booked TUF 17 runner-up Uriah Hall against Nick Ring in a pivotal middleweight matchup. Ring pulled out almost immediately (there’s probably a joke to be made there) due to injury, and was replaced by fellow TUF 17 alum Josh Samman. Less than a month out from their fight, Samman was forced out of the bout and replaced by John Howard, who went on to defeat Hall via split decision.

And unfortunately, the second time around seems like more of the same for Hall. Minus that whole “losing by split decision” thing. Probably.

Hall was originally scheduled to face Costa Philippou on the main card of this weekend’s Fight Night 59 — that was, until Philippou pulled out of the bout on New Year’s Day with a rib injury. Hall was then paired against the 11-3 Louis “Handgunz” Taylor in what promised to be a fight that would be broadcast on television, but wouldn’t you know it, Taylor has now pulled out of the bout with a back injury. The UFC was not pleased with this development.

But you’re probably wondering: Did the UFC manage to scrounge up some poor sap to face Hall on a week’s notice? And does this poor sap’s nickname make me yearn for the days of Louis “Handgunz” Taylor? Those answers are after the jump!

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UFC Cancels March 7th Fight Night Event Rumored for Windsor, Ontario


(Remember, this “schedule” is for entertainment purposes only.)

We’re just 12 days into 2015, and the UFC is already learning that announcing an entire year’s event schedule in advance is easier said than done. MMAJunkie passes along the word that the UFC Fight Night event slated for March 7th will not be taking place. The now-deceased card was expected to air on Fight Pass, and was rumored to be held in Windsor, Ontario, Canada. No fights had been officially tied to the event. According to an official statement issued to MMAJunkie:

“While rumors of an event in Windsor had been circulating, this event was never officially confirmed or announced by UFC. UFC did consider holding a Canadian Fight Night event in March. However, the organization always strives to put on first-class events in every city, and this was proving to be a challenge within the required timeframe.”

If you look up there at the schedule, you’ll see that the March 7th date was the fifth in a string of back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back UFC events from February 14th to March 21st. Good Lord. I can’t imagine what the UFC matchmakers are going through trying to fill all these spots. However, our buddy Adam Martin suggests that there’s more to this story than simply an overloaded event schedule collapsing under its own weight:

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Quote of the Day: Dennis Siver Thinks Conor McGregor Should “Stick His Predictions in His Ass”


(Siver finishes Paul Kelly with a brutal spinning back kick at UFC 105. Unfortunately, all footage of this fight was lost in the Great Zuffa Fire of 2010.)

According to the advertisements that punctuated yesterday’s Packers-Cowboys game, Conor McGregor will be headlining Fight Night 59 in Boston this weekend. His opponent is something of a mystery man — a UFC newcomer hailing from parts unknown — hence the promotion’s inability to secure any footage of his previous fights. Which seems odd to me, because this mystery gentleman (Dennis Si-ver, am I saying that right?) is apparently of a high-enough caliber to earn McGregor a featherweight title shot should he emerge victorious.

Sarcasm aside, it’s safe to say that the 18-fight UFC veteran (and current +750 underdog. Can you say #1 CONTENDER MATCH!!) has been largely overlooked by the press heading into his fight with McGregor. Maybe the language barrier is to blame, or maybe it’s because Siver is not so easily wowed by the opulence of a drop-top Ferrari tour around Vegas. In any case, it’d be nice to actually hear how the #10 ranked featherweight feels about his “notorious” opponent, fighting in a main event, and being completely counted out in said main event, right?

Well thanks to the always reliable (Deutschland) MMA media, we finally can. In a recent interview with GroundandPound.de, the Russian-born, German-raised fighter took full advantage of his one-stop media tour, pulling a GSP when assessing McGregor’s skillset and laughing off the idea that he wouldn’t last more than two minutes against the Irishman. It was undeniably awesome.

Siver’s strong words are after the jump. 

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UFC Booking Alert: Rory MacDonald vs. Hector Lombard at UFC 186


(Photo via Getty)

Rory MacDonald‘s next fight will be against the resurgent Cuban judoka and former Bellator middleweight champ, Hector Lombard at UFC 186 in Montreal this April. The initial report came from Vendetta Fighter, but was later confirmed by MMA Fighting.

Late last year, Fans and pundits alike thought MacDonald would face the winner of Robbie Lawler vs. Johny Hendricks II. A controversial decision in Lawler’s favor put the brakes on that since it forced the UFC to book a trilogy between the two welterweights.

MacDonald, left without a dancing partner, will face off with one of the top welterweights in the division in Lombard. We like to think UFC matchmaker Joe Silva booked this fight based on both fighters’ terrible nicknames. We’ve got Rory “The Waterboy” “Ares” “The Red King” vs. Hector “Lightning” “Showweather” Lombard. Ugh. How about the loser AND winner take their nicknames out back and shoot them?

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Look at Jon Jones’ High School Yearbook Picture


(“Jon Jones love u…pussy” / Caption and photo via Reddit)

Late last night, someone posted this photo of school-age Jon Jones (sorry, Jonathon Jones) to r/MMA. It’s hard to guess his age from the picture, but he looks pretty young. Maybe he’s a freshman or something? The Redditor who uploaded the photo said this was from a high school yearbook. Are freshman usually included in those? Yearbooks were seniors only in my school. Then again, my school was so poor and shitty that administration regularly canceled the basketball team’s games when it rained because the roof leaked so badly.

Anyway, the Reddit commenters made all the obvious jokes. So We’ll just end this slow-news-weekend post by asking this: Who would’ve thought the smiling teenager would’ve become the most feared and talented fighter known to man? Just think about that. While Fedor and other legends were striking awe into our hearts and terror into the hearts of their opponents, Jon Jones was awkwardly writing “love u” in yearbooks. More food for thought: Some punk 14-year-old out there decked out in TapouT merch (or now Tapout-WWE merch, I guess) is going to beat the shit out of Jon Jones in a few years. Cool to think about, isn’t it?

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Wanderlei Silva Buries the Nevada Athletic Commission, Continues Descent Into Irrelevance

Jon Jones tested positive for cocaine earlier this week! You know what that means, right? If you guessed an overhaul of drug testing procedures and increased transparency from the Nevada Athletic Commission and the UFC, you’d be wrong. No, what this significant development in MMA means is another Wanderlei Silva pro wrestling-style shoot promo.

He set his sights on the NAC, bashing them for ruining Jones’ reputation and for being the bumbling, corrupt idiots we all sort of know they are (transcript via MMA Fighting). Read it after the jump.

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Classic Fight: Donald Cerrone and Ben Henderson’s 2009 “Fight of the Year” at WEC 43


And now, your weekly reminder that Todd Harris is no longer a part of our lives. :(  

In order to get us hyped for Donald Cerrone vs. Ben Henderson III at Fight Night 59 next weekend, the UFC has generously made the pair’s initial meeting at WEC 43 available for viewing on its official Youtube page. In what would be voted “Fight of the Year” by Sherdog when all was said and done, Henderson would defeat Cerrone via unanimous decision and secure the interim lightweight championship in the process.

But rather than give you some paint-by-numbers play-by-play of a fight you can watch with your own two eyes above, we’d rather call your attention to an ultra-brief moment during “Cowboy’s” introduction that we simply cannot stop watching.

At around the 2:13 mark, the camera pans across the audience in attendance at WEC 43 — specifically, those sitting in the premo cageside seats. It’s the classic kind of crowd shot that has given us dozens of gif-worthy moments in the past (“Girl in the White Dresshnnnng), but none that stack up to the woman in the red blouse sitting in the second row.

After hours of research that probably could have been spent doing something more productive, we have yet to clarify whether or not the man sitting to her left is Paul Buentello. What we do know, however, is that she is miserable. Like, 8 months pregnant and waiting for her husband to return home with the pizza miserable. (Ed note: Yes, this took us *hours* to determine. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?)

What in God’s name happened to her? Is she tired? Flu-ridden? Under duress? Is she trying to avoid being caught with her sidepiece on camera like that OSU fan last week? Or did we simply happen to witness the exact moment in which Buentello pitched her his latest catchphrase? Infinite possibilities, each more intriguing than the last…

Check out the full video of Cerrone/Henderson 1 above, if you’re into that sort of thing. I, on the other hand, have some phone calls to make.

-J. Jones

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Rumor: WWE and TapouT to Announce Exclusive Sponsorship Deal


(Not Exactly as Real as It Gets, But Pretty Damn Real, Relatively Speaking!!™ / Photo via WWE.com)

According to a wild claim from sports gossip blog TerezOwens, TapouT is preparing to announce a deal with the WWE, in which the lifestyle brand will serve as the exclusive sponsor for the WWE’s talent roster, similar to Reebok’s uniform deal with the UFC.

I know what you’re thinking: What does the world’s leading producer of novelty children’s beds have to do with professional wrestling? Obviously, TapouT was a ubiquitous presence in MMA beginning in the late ’90s, but the company’s reputation has faded in the wake of Charles Lewis’s death, assorted legal hassles, and a flood of competitors. Could TapouT really be transitioning to the WWE universe, in order to reach a brand new sub-demographic of douchebags?

At this point, the only official comment from FrontRowBrian is “stock will plunge.” We’re not sure if he’s referring to the WWE’s stock or TapouT’s stock. Probably both. We’ll keep you posted as soon as this rumor is confirmed/debunked.

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Friday Links: Jon Jones Was Not Using Synthetic Testosterone, WSOF Exec Goes to Prison, War Machine Finds Jesus + More


(Chael Sonnen posts a mysterious tweet about Jon Jones back in September 2012, then enjoys a Coke at the weigh-ins for their fight. Hmm… / props: Reddit/MMA)

NSAC Head: Jon Jones’ Testosterone Clean Prior to UFC 182; Carbon Isotope Ratio Test Conducted (MMAFighting)

The Dana White/Jon Jones Hypocrisy Megamix (MMAVines)

WSOF Executive Shawn Lampman Sentenced to Ten Months in Federal Prison for Tax Conviction (BloodyElbow)

Oh Great, War Machine Found Jesus (twishort)

Chris Weidman’s Random Drug Test Results Come Back Clean Ahead of UFC 184 (MMAMania)

UFC TV Ban in Germany Lifted by Court Decision (reddit)

8 Video Games That Everyone Will Be Playing In 2015 (EscapistMagazine)

Watch This Real Life Peter Griffin Impersonator Totally Kill It At NYC Comic Con (PopHangover)

The 23 Worst Personal Hells Imaginable (Radass)

VIDEO: Australian Hurdler Michelle Jenneke Is Back, And Hotter Than Ever (World Star, Baby)

Good Monopoly, Bad Monopoly: When are Monopolies Actually a Problem? (EveryJoe)

The 20 Dumbest Internet Products Of All Time (WorldWideInterweb)

Honest Trailer: Taken (ScreenJunkies)

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Is Conor McGregor Worthy of a Featherweight Title Shot? CagePotato Explains Why It Makes Sense [VIDEO]

Earlier this week, BG chewed the fat with the TYT Sports gang about Jon Jones vs. Daniel Cormier. (We also shot a segment wondering what might be next for Jon Jones, but it looks like we already have an answer to that.)

Here’s a bonus clip from our conversation, about the UFC’s reported plan to award Conor McGregor a title shot against Jose Aldo if he can get past Dennis Siver later this month at UFC Fight Night 59. Is this the right move by the UFC? And will McGregor blow through Siver as quickly as he claims? The answers await you in the video above. Thanks for watching, and follow TYT Sports on twitter if you like sports-things.

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CagePotatoMMA