IQ or sperm count? No, I mean FUCK YOU!

According to Dana White and Nate Diaz himself, the newly declared #1 contender for the light-weight division stated at the UFC on FOX post-fight press conference that he will wait for the winner of the pending Ben Henderson VS Frankie Edgar bout. Just prior to the Jim Miller VS Nate Diaz contest, the rumor mill began to swirl that Edgar had injured his nose in training and the upcoming rematch with BenDo was going to get pushed back until later this year in the September-November area. If that is the case, Diaz is going to be sitting for the next several months.

According to the official UFC twitter account:
“Dana says Diaz will wait for the title shot. He had the option to fight Pettis first if he wanted to stay busy but it was never mandated.”

Fair enough, I suppose, but if Nate is going to wait until after the scheduled championship rematch and then linger until the winner heals, we are conservatively looking at March of 2013 or later before he competes again. That is a pretty long lay-off for a competitor that had 4 fights in 2011. Not only did he compete 4 times last year, he mixed a change of weight-class in between the two. Since being dominated by Rory MacDonald, Diaz has destroyed Takanori Gomi, Donald Cerrone and Jim Miller while raking in 2 “submission of the night” bonuses plus a “fight of the night” check as well.

(“Only bad guys wear black hats, homie.”)

If you didn’t happen to catch the UFC 141 pre-fight press conference today, we’re going to show you what you missed in under 10 seconds after the jump.

(Believe it or not, Nate’s biceps are the pride of the 209. They don’t have that much to be proud of.)

Ah, the post-defeat talk of changing weight classes. Or, as we like to call it, the fighter’s false friend. Usually, unless a guy is getting on in years, his answer to a difficult patch in his career is to go down in weight, maybe fight some of those pipsqueaks in the division below his. Nate Diaz however, has a different idea. According to post on GracieFighter.com in which he apologized for fighting “like garbage” and suggested that Gray Maynard’s face was too bloody to really deserve the decision, Diaz outlined a plan to go up to welterweight, explaining:

“I really don’t think I’m going to stay at 155lbs. I don’t make enough money to have to drop this much weight so I’d like to fight at 170 and only go to 55′s every once in awhile.”

Forgetting for the moment that his reasoning is completely flawed (seriously? you acknowledge that you can cut the weight, but don’t get paid enough to do it?), here’s why that’s a terrible idea:

(Somewhere in Indiana, Miguel Torres is breathing a sigh of relief.) 

Ladies and gentlemen, we give you the single dumbest tweet of 2013. The top one.

385 retweets. 184 favorites. And counting.

Feel free to start speculating how much Diaz gets fined for this, or what his inevitable apology to the LGBT community will sound like, in the comments section.

-J. Jones

(Nate Diaz never gets tired of doing his impression of that scene in "Conan the Barbarian" where Thulsa Doom turns into a snake.)

Though Nate Diaz would have us believe that he hardly even got touched in three dominant rounds against Gray Maynard at UFC Fight Night 20, Maynard’s website features a few photos that tell a different story.  He has several nice shots of him laying hands upon Diaz, though strangely enough, not a single one of him getting hit.  There’s some of him dodging blows, or slipping and countering, but none of him actually taking a shot.  If only there were a more impartial photo source that could set the record straight…

(Shirtless Saturdays just aren’t going to be the same around the gym without Nick.)

MMAFighting.com’s Ariel Helwani caught up with UFC on Fox 3 headliner Nate Diaz today at the press conference today in New York for the New Jersey event and the lightweight contender revealed that he thinks his brother Nick’s days in the Octagon are over.

“Triathlon season is starting so he’s just training, getting in shape for that. [He's] concentrating on being in shape, being healthy, helping me out and coaching me for my fights. Right now, I don’t think [we'll ever see him back]. He’s just big on, like I said, just being healthy and staying in shape and not worrying about [fighting] and thinking about it. I think he’s retired. He hasn’t been into this whole fighting thing for some time, you know? Since everything that goes on with the funny wins and losses — for not just him — for me and for people on our team. I think he’s just relaxed right now and he’s pretty set on his retirement. I kind of agree with him, you know? It’s hard to say, especially when it’s somebody like my brother,” Nate explained.

Check out the video and the rest of what Nate had to say about the situation after the jump.

(Markham lands a vicious head kick on Brodie Farber while pondering that age-old question, is it still a tramp stamp if it has a vaguely threatening message?)

It turns out that we aren’t the only ones who are skeptical about Nate Diaz‘s chances to make it in the UFC as a 170-pounder.  Rory Markham, who will welcome Diaz to the division at UFC 111 on March 27, recently told us he doesn’t see the Stockton, Ca. product having a lot of success in the welterweight class, partly because he lacks the punching power, but also because he’s trying to make the jump too soon.

"Moving up and down in weight always seems like a simple fix, but you have to have time to do it. He’s not taking a lot of time to go up, and I think that’s going to hinder him greatly. If you don’t take it slow, you don’t put on the muscle right. I understand his motivation for going up, but I don’t know if it’s a good idea for him. He didn’t exactly carry a bunch of power at 155, and there are some heavy-hitters up here in this weight class. That’s something I know I carry. I can say that whole-heartedly and humbly."

Markham, who’s 1-1 in the UFC and has his own striking power to thank for 11 of his 16 career victories, says he had a somewhat unusual reaction to being offered the fight with Diaz over the weekend.

Video courtesy ShootMedia)

It’s amazing how perception works.

Nick Diaz is convinced that he and his Team Cesar Gracie teammates were attacked by Jason "Mayhem" Miller and his Team Quest teammates following Jake Shields’ win over Dan Henderson at Strikeforce’s Nashville show in April and he says that by "fighting back" they were merely defending themselves.

"I’m the last person who wants to take a punch from somebody and I don’t know who out there wants to hit me. All I know is this guy…Gilbert pushes him back and he runs at us and we’re fighting now. You want me to be the victim here and just let my boy get punched, or me? We’re on one team." 

(Unless you have your last name and a dog’s face tattooed on your back, you really can’t call yourself “alpha.” / Photo courtesy of Heavy.com/MMA)

Following his UFC 137 Submission of the Night victory over Dennis Siver, Donald Cerrone — one of the gamest sons-of-bitches in MMA — made it known that he’d like another fight before the year is out. As confirmed by MMA Junkie, the UFC has granted his wish, sticking Cowboy on the UFC 141: Lesnar vs. Overeem card (December 30th, Las Vegas) against lightweight mainstay Nate Diaz. You dodged a bullet, Nam Phan.

Cerrone is currently on a six-fight win streak, including a 4-0 stretch in the Octagon since debuting for the promotion in February. Picking up a fifth UFC victory inside a calendar year would be nearly unprecedented. (I know Roger Huerta did it in 2007; if there any MMA stats masters in the house who can provide other examples, please do so in the comments section.)

(Via Nate Diaz’s Twitter)

Say you lost a decision in a close fight that you feel you deserved to win.  You really have only two possible ways to respond: 1) Shrug, say you did your best, and remind everyone that this is why you don’t leave it in the hands of the judges, or 2) make a video of yourself in the parking lot of a 24-Hour Fitness showing off the remarkable lack of facial damage that you sustained in the fight, proving unequivocally that you got straight-up screwed, homey.

If you know anything at all about Nate Diaz, you know which option he decided to go with.  Nate posted this video to his Twitter today, following an earlier message stating that he’s watched the fight three times since Monday and has come to the conclusion that he won — get this — all three rounds.  Added Diaz: "fuck the haters…"

(“Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here, this is the War Room!” Screenshot via Deadspin/ Tim Burke)

By Elias Cepeda

If you’re anything like me, there were a couple times during Saturday’s UFC on Fox telecast where you angrily shouted at the television. I wasn’t upset at a favorite fighter getting beaten or even vainly yelling out instructions per the common ridiculous spectator custom.

No, I, and perhaps you as well, got upset when Fox repeatedly cut away from the action to show a long overhead shot of an empty UFC Octagon. As Maggie Hendricks at Yahoo! Sports confirmed, those cut-aways were not technical goof ups. ”[Nate] Diaz threw up the middle finger at his opponent, and the network cut away instead of risking a fine from the Federal Communications Commission,” Hendricks wrote on her CageWriter blog.

One of the gestures came while Diaz was working for a heel-hook on Benson Henderson, who was sitting in a near full-split position on the canvas. The champion was unfazed by Diaz’s gestures as he had prepared for the Stockton native’s tactics, both physical and psychological.

“It’s something I actually had a little bit of a hard time with, but once my training partners got together, they all started talking crap to me in the middle of sparring and I’d get angry,” Henderson revealed on Fuel TV’s post fight show. “They helped control it and I did a pretty good job of being very focused and not letting that affect my emotional state in the middle of the fight.”

So, what’s all the fuss been about on the net since then? On Yahoo’s front page, Hendricks’s story was linked to with the headline, “Fighter’s tasteless moves rattle television broadcast.” Yes, the network that has brought us Cops, Temptation Island and The Simple Life was “rattled” and nearly brought to its sweet, innocent knees by Nate Diaz‘s tactical posturing during his fight.

(Yeah, we know that’s a different Diaz, but that doesn’t make the message any less valid. Props: jaylibbb)

After suffering back-to-back decision defeats in his last two fights against Dong Hyun Kim and Rory MacDonald, Nate Diaz will be dropping back to his original home at lightweight, according to UFC.com. Diaz’s return opponent will be Japanese MMA icon Takanori Gomi at UFC 135: Jones vs. Rampage, September 24th in Denver. Gomi is coming off a submission loss to Clay Guida at UFC 125 in January, and has gone 1-2 overall in his current stint with the UFC.

Nate’s brother Nick previously faced Gomi at PRIDE 33 in one of the greatest bouts in MMA history; Diaz wore Gomi down in a gritty slugfest before tapping him in round 2 via gogoplata. The win was overturned and ruled a no-contest when Diaz tested positive for marijuana in a post-fight drug test. But come on, bro, we all saw what happened.

(Diaz pops Marcus Davis in the jaw at UFC 118; meanwhile, Yves Lavigne notices the rancid smell coming from his armpits. / Props: CageWriter.com)

As first broken by Korean news site mfight.co.kr, Nate Diaz (13-5) will reportedly make his Octagon return against Dong Hyun "Stun Gun" Kim (13-0-1, 1 no contest), at UFC 125: Edgar vs. Maynard on New Year’s Day. Diaz most recently picked up his second victory at welterweight, beating the piss out of Marcus Davis at UFC 118 before choking him to sleep in the third round.

Kim’s last cage-appearance was a unanimous decision win over Amir Sadollah at UFC 114, in a performance that was marked by Kim’s superior wrestling and positional control. No, it wasn’t the most exciting fight, but it got the job done and preserved DHK’s unblemished record. Kim was scheduled to return against John Hathaway at UFC 120, but was forced to drop out of the fight due to injury. (Injury withdrawals are kind of a bad habit for Kim, who also missed scheduled UFC meetings with Dan Hardy and Chris Lytle.)

Diaz is on his way to becoming a real contender in the welterweight division — but as we saw in his lightweight losses to Gray Maynard, Joe Stevenson, and Clay Guida, he’s vulnerable against strong wrestlers. If Kim can blanket him like he did to Sadollah, it could be a sad night in Stockton.

(“Chained Fists,” only available at NathanDiaz.com.)

On Friday, we put two Nate Diaz-related t-shirts up for grabs to the readers who could provide the best captions for the above photo involving Randy Couture, Gina Carano, and three of their groupies. And apparently you really want to represent tha’ 209, because you came full force with it. First, our honorable mentions…

Matt Herpes: This is exactly why Kim bought that testicle-scale.

F.A.S.: Xtreme Ho-ture

Damien: Looks like Fedor isn’t the only heavyweight that Randy wants to get his hands on.

boobah: Gina later realized that Applebee’s was not the best choice for cutting weight.

MMA-hole: “Yeah, that’s right…I’m Bruce Willis…”

TheFeniX: Shown here: People who make a living destroying others for monetary gain, every 6 months or so. Also pictured: Randy Couture and Gina Carano.

bmwtech: Just goes to show you that every group of girls has a DBUF. Designated bald ugly friend.

And now, the shirt-winners…

(Ronaldo Souza’s alligator dance: You’re doing it wrong. Photo courtesy of Getty Images.) 

Well, well, well, isn’t this peculiar.

When Nick Diaz starting lobbing accusations of negligence at his own team during the UFC 158 post-fight press conference last month — a team that prides themselves on a wolfpack-like sense of loyalty if nothing else — we initially wrote it off as little more than the fleeting words of a man grasping at straws to save his MMA career. Nick’s attitude regarding his most recent retirement only drove this notion home. That being said, it was hard not to at least speculate that Diaz’s longtime coach/manager/muzzle, Cesar Gracie, could be at least partially responsible for the Stocktonian’s ongoing troubles over the years. Dana White seemed to agree, calling Gracie “a dick” who “plays bullshit games.”

And indeed, it appears that even the members of Team Cesar Gracie are starting to grow tired of his shit, as it was recently announced that former lightweight title challenger Nate Diaz has left the team — managerially, at least — for greener pastures (via MMAMania):

According to a report from Ariel Helwani on Tuesday’s (April 9, 2013) edition of “UFC Tonight” on FUEL TV, the Stockton, Calif., native has enlisted the management services of Mike Kogan, who heads Real Talk Entertainment, representing notable names such as UFC heavyweight Roy Nelson and former Strikeforce light heavyweight champion Muhammed Lawal, among others. 

(Video courtesy YouTube/WorldFightProducts)

UFC lightweight-welterweight, Nate Diaz was in Toronto over the weekend for some guest appearances and I debated whether or not I should make the hour-and-a-half trek to interview him for the site, but ultimately I decided against it knowing that interviewing him is like hunting for truffles. You never know if you’re going to find anything valuable or just come home covered in mud and having wasted your day.

As you can see by the video above, which ranks in my top-ten most awkward fighter interviews of all time, the likelihood that I would have found a "truffle" were slim to none as Nate didn’t seem in the least bit interested in answering any of the interviewer’s mundane questions.

Maybe it had something to do with the guy’s habit of replying to each of Nate’s answers with "Cool!" or "Super!" or "Super Cool!" or maybe its because he and Nick are both sociopaths in the classic sense of the word.

(Marcus awoke in a strange room with red carpet and red furniture, naked women on the walls. Was he still dreaming? Just then, a midget entered and began to dance. / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle.)

We may have supported the idea of a Boston vs. New York rivalry-match between Marcus Davis and Phil Baroni at UFC 118, but this could work out even better. According to multiple sources, Davis has verbally agreed to take on Nate Diaz at the August 28th event in Boston. The Irish Hand Grenade saved his job last weekend at UFC 113 with his second-round TKO of Jonathan Goulet (who has been fired again, by the way). Meanwhile, Diaz is coming off his whipping of Rory Markham in his welterweight debut at UFC 111, which followed a 1-3 stretch at lightweight. There might be one hitch in the plan, however — Diaz’s involvement in last month’s brawl at Strikeforce: Nashville. As MMA Junkie writes: 

Six people who participated in the CBS-televised brawl await possible suspension and/or fines from the Tennessee Athletic Commission, though their names have yet to be officially released. A commission meeting scheduled for Thursday in Nashville was delayed by massive flooding that’s submerged much of the city’s downtown area. The meeting tentatively has been rescheduled for May 27. If Diaz is held responsible for his part in the brawl, the TAC could fine him up to $250,000, though he could appeal the fine and delay its enactment.

UFC 118 will be headlined by Penn vs. Edgar II, and will very likely feature James Toney’s UFC debut against Randy Couture; Kenny Florian vs. Gray Maynard is also expected for the card.

(“OMG THOSE SHOES ARE FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAABULOUS!!!!” / Photo via Sherdog)

If you thought Nate Diaz was going to accept his UFC on FOX 7 loss to Josh Thomson gracefully, then brother, you just don’t know what it means to be a Diaz. Nate was a guest on BJPenn.com Radio yesterday, where he squeezed enough sour grapes to make a fine red whine. (I’m not even going to ask if you saw what I did there. I know damn well that you saw it.) Here are some of the highlights, as transcribed by MMAMania and MMAFighting:

“[Thomson] didn’t come in there and put no ass whopping on me. You know what I’m saying? He didn’t come in there and make anything happen. I have never fought somebody before who had ever wanted out of a fight so bad. I expected a fight. I expected him to grab me and try to hold on to me or throw some kicks and move and throw some punches and move but that motherfucker was straight running and I had to chase him down. I was chasing him the whole fight. I was the aggressor. I was restless, you know? How can you not be when a guy is running scared shitless for his life? I’m over aggressive trying to get a hold of him and that’s why I got hit, because I’m over aggressive. I’m trying to meet the criteria to win these rounds…

“[He] was scared shitless when I was fighting him. It’s unbelievable how scared he was in there. He was running for his life…He was making bitch ass lady sounds and that’s not bullshit. I’m not here talking shit on him, this is reality. He was making woman sounds. He was running out of the clinch. I hit him in the face and he was going ‘Oh, oh, ehh’ making woman sounds I’ve never even heard out of a man before during a fight. I’m hearing his corner telling him to smile and I’m like, ‘Yeah, smile mother fucker’ and not a single smile came out of his mouth. He had a look of panic the whole fight. You have to be in there to fight these guys to know that. This is how it went. I’ve seen him in other fights, he was smiling at the other guy, bouncing around. He didn’t have no time for that against me. He was frantic and trying not to get his ass whooped…

(Now that we’ve seen Gray’s sparring partners, his boast about having never lost a round in training seems a little less impressive.)

By Elias Cepeda for CagePotato.com

When Gray Maynard (9-0-1) got matched up with Roger Huerta last September, many picked the former Michigan State Wrestler to steamroll the cover boy and aspiring movie actor. And though Maynard clearly and cleanly won, it was a tough-fought decision victory.

Fortunately for the Xtreme Couture team member, he fully expected a hard fight from Huerta, even if others did not. “He can scramble really well, he’s good inside and he can box,” Maynard says. “You’ve got to give him more credit. He doesn’t quit so you know it’s going to be a tough one.”

The win was the undefeated lightweight’s sixth consecutive in the UFC and observers wonder how close Maynard is to getting a title shot. Despite one of the most impressive runs in the division and wins over other top guys like Frankie Edgar, the timing hasn’t quite worked out for Maynard yet and he’s yet to be booked for a championship bout.

(Mike Kogan’s profile pic courtesy of FindABearTonight.xxx)

At this point, we all know that Nate Diaz has been suspended and fined for calling Bryan Caraway a “Fag” through his twitter account. Other than deleting and re-wording his original tweet, Diaz has been silent on the matter since originally criticizing Caraway for accepting the Submission of the Night bonus cash that was originally designated for Pat Healy until “Bam Bam” tested positive for marijuana metabolites after choking out Jim Miller at UFC 159.

Diaz’s new manager Mike Kogan, however, just can’t seem to shut up about it all — and he’s making his client look even worse in the process.

Immediately following Diaz’s tweet, Kogan issued a ridiculous justification to MMA Junkie that showcased a stunning lack of self-awareness.

“Guess what? The word faggot, at least in Northern California, and where Nate is from, means bitch,” Kogan said. “It means you’re a little punk. It has nothing to do with homosexuals at all. So when Nate made the comment that he made, he didn’t make it in reference to homosexuals or calling Caraway a homosexual. He just said it was a bitch move.”

Separating the word “faggot” from its many historical applications for insulting gay people, as Kogan tried to do, is a stretch. But let’s say that it was possible to separate them. We’d still be left with Diaz publicly calling someone a “bitch” — another word commonly used to insinuate homosexuality, and far more often used to insult women — and Kogan defending the usage of that word just as strongly.

Even if we recognize the obvious fact that Diaz’s tweet was insensitive, few people would crucify him simply for using those slurs in a moment of frustration. All we’re asking for is a little reflection, and some recognition of the fact that, though you may not be a bad dude deep down, that was an insensitive thing to say and a sincere apology is warranted. Or, again, to at least shut up about it all.

Kogan seems far too dense to do that. The manager was recently on MMA Fighting’s MMA Hour and went out of his way to insist that both he and Diaz are offering no apologies.

(Nate Diaz poses with future UFC bantamweight champ Ronnie Ortiz-Magro.)

The UFC confirmed this morning that their third FOX show will take place May 5 at the Izod Center in East Rutherford, N.J. Though it hasn’t been officially marked as the headliner, a high-profile lightweight bout between Nate Diaz and Jim Miller will be featured on the main card.

Diaz is coming off a three-round domination of Donald Cerrone at UFC 141 — arguably the greatest performance of his career — making it two wins in a row for Diaz since he returned to lightweight last fall. Meanwhile, New Jersey native Jim Miller bounced back to the win column last Friday with a first-round submission of Melvin Guillard, proving that he still belongs among the division’s elite. Though the fight probably isn’t a #1 contender’s match, it’ll certainly bump the winner very close to a title shot. Fun fact: In 27 combined UFC fights, neither man has ever been stopped.

(Props: UFC.com via MiddleEasy)

Following yesterday’s face-off dust-up with Donald Cerrone, Nate Diaz explained why he was forced to knock off Cowboy’s hat and shove him. In short, Cerrone got too close: “He was just trying to walk forward on me and, y’know, trying to get the jump on me, so whatever. He shouldn’t have walked that close, put his stupid-ass cowboy hat all up on me. I wasn’t trying to be a bully or anything, but he shouldn’t have done that.”

Meanwhile, brother Nick eggs him on as much as possible. Like Cerrone put it before, these two just wake up pissed off all the time for no reason. And remember, Nate and Cowboy still have one more face-off to get through at today’s UFC 141 weigh-ins — and then, y’know, an actual fight. Brace yourselves.

After the jump, a video of the Cerrone vs. Diaz and Lesnar vs. Overeem face-offs from yesterday’s press conference, via Karyn Bryant.

(The “fag shoes” in question, via @MikeKogan)

By George Shunick

As Jared reminded us today while discussing Josh Thompson’s unfortunate comments regarding gay marriage, the MMA world had managed to go a solid 20 days without a significant figure saying something extraordinarily stupid on social media. The last particular incident involved Nate Diaz’s use of the term “fag,” and was made even more memorable by Mike Kogan’s moronic defense of Diaz’s “Northern California” vernacular. Kogan — Diaz’s manager — drew upon his years of public relations experience and his vast knowledge of etymology…and cited Urban Dictionary as evidence that Diaz’s use of “fag” didn’t constitute a homophobic slur.

Needless to say, people didn’t really buy that.

However, let’s give Kogan the benefit of the doubt here. Let’s say he really doesn’t believe that “fag” is a derogatory slur for homosexuals or a bigoted criticism of something perceived as homosexual behavior. It would mean Kogan has an extraordinarily poor grasp of context, history and sociopolitical reality — which incidentally, is entirely plausible in the case of Nate Diaz — but not to a far greater extent than many other Americans. It’s not justifiable, but perhaps it’s a plausible explanation for his ignorance.

Or at least it might have been, until he tweeted this.

(Let’s just say that Diaz’s apology is still in the early draft stage.)

Update: Diaz has received an immediate 90-day suspension and $20,000 fine for violating the UFC’s fighter code of conduct.

Regardless of how you feel about the whole Pat Healy situation (it’s some bullshit) or Bryan Caraway’s subsequent anti-marijuana rant, it would be hard to argue that Nate Diaz expressed his opinions on the situation correctly when he called Caraway a “Fag” for “taking” Healy’s SOTN bonus. Whether he meant to offend the LGBT community or not when he typed it (our guess is that he didn’t, which his manager has also *attempted* to affirm), he probably should have known that, as a public figure, you can’t so much as call someone “lame” in the public forum without incurring the wrath of all the stump-footed people you offended shortly thereafter. It’s the world we live in, for better or for worse, and it’s also why a “Code of Conduct” was recently established in the UFC.

The fact that UFC fighters have been fired over similar (albeit much more offensive) tweets in the past should have raised some red flags, which is maybe why Diaz deleted his original tweet, then reworded it to his liking before posting it yesterday. Unfortunately for Diaz, the UFC has responded quickly and harshly, stating the following:

We are very disappointed by Nate Diaz’s comments, which are in no way reflective of our organization. Nate is currently suspended pending internal investigation and we will provide further comment once the matter has been decided.

We are going to fine, suspend or cut him. One or two of those three will happen.

(“…and I’m just saying, in this new 163-pound division, maybe motherf*ckers shouldn’t be allowed to kick you in your damn neck so much.” / Photo via Esther Lin @ MMAFighting)

Even before he lost his second consecutive lightweight fight to Josh Thomson at UFC on FOX 7, Nate Diaz was eyeing a return to welterweight — a division he’d already bounced out of in 2011, following back-to-back losses to Dong Hyun Kim and Rory MacDonald. So what’s a guy supposed to do if he’s not powerful enough to deal with the beasts at 170, and cutting to 155 is no longer worth the misery? Call it sour grapes if you will, but Nate floated the following suggestion on twitter yesterday:

@ufc more weight classes ASAP?? 163,178,193 More super fights more champion vs champion, closer to weight better fights more potential …

Obviously, that 163-pound division would be tailor-made for the younger Diaz brother, so it makes sense that he’d support it. But self-interest aside, there’s some logic to the idea. While UFC president Dana White has been looking to smaller and smaller fighters as the future of the promotion — 115-pound dudes? seriously? — the UFC already has a deep roster of talented, popular contenders who have suffered from being “in between” weight classes, either ruining their bodies through massive weight cuts to stay competitive, or giving up tremendous size disadvantages to compete at a more “natural” division.

(“Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein, clearly foreshadowing the career of Nate Diaz.)

You remember how we previously discussed the wolfpack-like sense of loyalty that seems to exist between the members of Team Cesar Gracie? Or how they would rather retire than face another member of their loyal platoon in glorious mixed martial arts competition? Well, since Nate Diaz’s training partner/homeboy Gil Melendez is fighting Ben Henderson at UFC on FOX 7 this weekend and is going to win the fight with 100% certainty (and the fight after that, and the fight after that…), the former #1 contender might as well get to steppin’. That’s according to him, at least:

I’m not huntin’ (the title) right now, honestly. My boy is about to put it down and hold the belt for the next … I don’t even know how long. I’m probably gonna bail up outta this weight division as soon as this fight is done. I fought everybody at lightweight already. 

That’s right, despite compiling an 9-4 UFC record at lightweight that included a(n unsuccessful) title shot against Ben Henderson last December, Diaz is presumably headed back to the division that saw him score wins over a couple of guys who have since been fired and get absolutely manhandled by Dong Hyun Kim and Rory MacDonald. Pardon my language, but boy, you have smoked yourself retarded.

(Pictured above: Nate Diaz and a pre-beard Johny Hendricks.) 

Yesterday, the UFC and FOX held an open media conference call, which featured UFC President Dana White, middleweight contender and FOX analyst Brian Stann, and Fox Sports Media Group Co-President Eric Shanks taking questions prior to this weekend’s UFC on FOX event. Among the questions to come up was one regarding the likelihood of the Nate Diaz/Jim Miller winner receiving the next title shot at 155 pounds. True to form, Dana White did not beat around the bush, declaring that to be true for at least half of the participants involved:

Should Diaz win, Diaz is definitely getting a title shot. Should Miller win, Miller’s probably going to be a fight or two away.

White when on to state that the same applied for Johny Hendricks should he get past Josh Koscheck on Saturday, whereas our boy Fraggle would have to get a couple more wins under his belt. Considering that both Koscheck and Miller recently suffered losses to the current champions of their respective weight classes (twice over if your Koscheck), this seems to make sense.

Everybody gather around and break out your tinfoil hats, because it’s conspiracy time.

The above clip comes to us courtesy of Inside MMA, who recently held interviews with both the lightweight number one contender Nate Diaz and coach Cesar Gracie, who is beginning to sound like little more than an omnipresent entity whose soul (get it? SOUL? I should really be getting paid more for this gold) reason for existence is to echo whatever a Diaz brother manages to mumble out between bong rips.

From what we could decipher, it appears that both Nate and Cesar have finally caught on to the longest running screwjob in MMA history: The judges vs. The brothers Diaz. Gracie was able to see through the bullshit and was the first to bring this to light, stating:

 I’ve never really seen a close decision where the nod was given to the Diaz’s. If it’s close, they’re going to lose. I don’t know why, maybe the judges don’t really care for them that much; they’re brash. 

While we were initially content to play Team Cesar Gracie a song on the world’s smallest violin, upon doing a little research (I KNOW RIGHT), we actually stumbled across a plot so thick and intricate that not even Nicolas Cage could unravel it in a series of increasingly shitty kids movies, so join us after the jump if you think your puny Earthling brains can handle it.

(The season three premiere of MMA Inside the Cage, featuring 12 killer knockouts from MMA events across the world, sent in by fans. Check it out and vote for your favorite right here.)

- Jon Jones Offers Up His Take On Saturday’s Light Heavyweight Bouts (Fightline)

- Nate Diaz Will Get the Next UFC Lightweight Title Shot (MMAJunkie)

- Dana White Thinks Matt Hughes, Forrest Griffin Should Retire (MMAFighting)

- UFC on Fox 4 Judo Chop: The Real Signature Moves of Lyoto Machida (BloodyElbow)

- Frankie Edgar’s 155 Reasons, Episode 1: ’155 Reasons In Defeat’ (HeavyMMA)

- “Great, another UFC ring girl with no ass.” (Facebook.com/CagePotato)

- Dana White: ‘Maybe You Do Rashad vs Weidman and the Winner Gets a Title Shot’ (BleacherReport/MMA)

- Olympic Weightlifter Kendrick J. Farris Will Pump You Up (MadeMan)

- The Get Back Into Training Workout (MensFitness)

- 20 Cool Things Buried in Lava (EgoTV)

- If Celebrities Had Three Boobs… [GALLERY] (WorldWideInterweb)

- This Is the Coolest Volleyball Play We’ve Ever Seen (DeadSpin)

Can you guys imagine what the MMA landscape will be like if Nate Diaz is able to defeat Ben Henderson on Saturday, thus becoming the lightweight champion? For starters, this article will be the first and last time you ever see the word “thus” in a sentence where the subject is a Diaz, but on the grander scale, just try and imagine the ways a Diaz with a belt will throw a wrench into the UFC’s plans. Interviews snippets will be so short and incoherent that MMA writers will be forced to resort to rambling, ludicrous conspiracy theories just to pass the time. And as for the brand-promoting public appearances that have become the standard for a champion? You can forget about those; we’re talking about a man who once tried to fight a fictional Brazilian character at a Jiu-Jitsu expo for Christ’s sake. If one fan even mentions the Maynard fight around Diaz in public, the UFC will probably have a full-scale riot on their hands.

If you would, just picture Nate Diaz at an anti-bullying seminar for a moment. After showing up 3 hours late and being reluctantly called to the stage, Diaz will deliver a one minute diatribe aimed at America’s “faggoty yoots“ who should “just like, yeah, I dunno” before calling out “that bitch Georges,” his eyes never lifting from the linoleum floor. When he is informed that he is in fact the lightweight champion and can’t fight GSP right now, Diaz will declare that he’s “done with this shit” before slapping that stupid ass hat off the school’s gym teacher on his way out the door. Simply put, it will be glorious.

Anyway, MMAInterviews recently asked a bevy of pros including Frankie Edgar, Randy Couture, Gray Maynard, and Donald Cerrone to determine the likelihood of a world in which a Diaz is champion, and believe it or not, the overwhelming majority of them believe it’s something we should start preparing ourselves for.

Part 1 is above and part 2 is after the jump.