(‘So how about if, like, at first I’ll let you beat me up some, then I start to come back, but I go for an elbow off the top rope and miss, right?  And then at the end, well, I haven’t decided who should win yet, but we’ll figure it out. Just saying though, it’d be more of a shock if it was me.’)

Affliction COO Michael Cohen contacted Fanhouse’s Ariel Helwani (and you know the situation is dire when people are actually calling Ariel rather than the other way around) to let us all know that there is absolutely no truth to the persistent rumor that Affliction III will be the organization’s last MMA event.  The fact that they’ve named it “Trilogy”?  Nah son, you shouldn’t read too much into that, says Cohen: “Trilogy just means that this is the third. This is the third of the series.”

Yeah, that’s the standard use of the word ‘trilogy.’  It refers to the third installment in a long and profitable series that continues to pump out new editions several times a year.  Like the “Lord of the Rings” trilogy and “The Godfather” trilogy.  Oh, wait.

I’m not sure what would be worse, if Affliction didn’t realize the implication inherent in naming their event “Trilogy,” or if they did understand yet have enough faith in the idiocy of the American public to think they can just keep saying there will be more events to come even as they’re packing up their ring and locking it away in the same storage facility where they keep their failed line of Kimo Leopoldo t-shirts.

When Helwani asks Cohen point blank if there will be a fourth event in 2009, his response, “Most probably,” is very telling.  In a situation like this that basically means, ‘Shit, I hope so.’  If there is a fourth event we can only assume it will be entitled “Tetralogy.”

Cohen also says the third event will “absolutely” be profitable, and will also see a diminished payroll, though that seems somewhat hard to fathom with Josh Barnett and Fedor Emelianenko as the main event.  It’s possible that they may get some of the fighters to take less money than in previous installments, but many of them are said to be on graduating pay scales.  Barnett is in his third fight with Affliction, and we know how he feels about taking a pay cut.  Looks like it’s down to you to make up the difference with your salary, Tim Sylvia.  Don’t act like you didn’t know this day was coming.

BTW, if you’re trying to decide how seriously to take Cohen’s comments, consider that he also made this pretty suspect claim about ticket sales for the first two Affliction shows: “If you look historically, the last two events were sell-outs of over 16,000 fans for each of the events.”  Which is, strictly speaking, not at all true.