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Alchemist Clothing Caption Contest: And the Winners Are…


(“Alright ladies, now smile as if you have any f*cking clue what’s going on right now.”)

Thanks to everybody who entered this week’s caption contest, which produced over 200 entries, most of them pretty damn funny. And yet, only three of you will be earning t-shirts from Alchemist Clothing. Doesn’t seem fair, does it? Anyway, let’s begin with some honorable mentions…

destinationblood: All they had left at the Halloween store was stewardess costumes, Rambo guns and a Fred Flintstone tie.

J. Spaceman: Hey Frye, this is how a real man pads his record!

missedcue: Even elite MMA fighters need Apple tech support.

missedcue, again: Dana: “Yeah I guess that’s cool but you still ain’t getting into the Smasher Group.”

intercept440: GAY TEST: If you notice the inconspicous black guy in the back ground…I have some bad news for you.
[Ed. note: Or, if you noticed Tim's pants before anything else...]

Ajax Says: After what happened in the fifth grade, Tim swore he would never have a bad yearbook picture ever again.

MaxS: No ladies that’s NOT a gun in my pocket…that’s just what “Ranger Up” means.

Morningwood: Now THIS is how you raise 120 bucks!

And now, the big winners:

MattHamillertime: After the Zuffa buyout, Tim Kennedy had to go back to his old job, bouncer of the Mile High Club.

El Famous Burrito: Tonight, on a very special Mad Men…Don Draper drops acid.

RwilsonR: On the set of the new adult film “Lay of Pigs: Kennedy’s Revenge – Castro’s women better be ready, because this time the only invasion… will be anal.”
[Ed. note: Wow. Historic *and* pornographic.]

Well done, Potato Nation! If you’re one of the Big 3, please swing by AlchemistClothing.com, find a shirt you like, then send your name, address, preferred shirt style and size to contest@cagepotato.com. We’ll hook you up ASAP. And don’t forget to follow Alchemist on Facebook and Twitter.

Cagepotato Comments

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vayden- March 19, 2011 at 5:09 pm
lol
Big Jumpin Dad- March 18, 2011 at 5:27 pm
@Viva Hate

Why are you who you are?
Viva Hate- March 18, 2011 at 3:20 pm
Congrats peeps, funny shit.
RWR had me rolling, brilliant!
ghostboner- March 18, 2011 at 1:09 pm
We had a caption contest?
El Guapo- March 18, 2011 at 12:40 pm
Thanks, Big Papa. But I'm a shitty speller, so it evins out.

Rexy, Rexy, Rexy... I knew that name was familiar. That is one underrated movie, BTW.
ReX13- March 18, 2011 at 12:34 pm
El Guapo >> It's a trick question! Lemmy *IS* God!
Big Jumpin Dad- March 18, 2011 at 12:26 pm
@El Guapo

Youre funny:)
El Guapo- March 18, 2011 at 11:59 am
It was a trick question, Hotshots! The correct answer was D)none of the above. In fact, only one is a real person. 7 feet tall, he is, with arms of granite and treetrunk legs capable of disposing 10 Mounties with one fell swoop. If you answered D), send me your name and address and I'll not only pretend to send you a shirt, I'll even act suprised when you say it never came.
J. Spaceman- March 18, 2011 at 11:48 am
I, too, was upset about the lack of delicious sandwiches. Now I’m just upset that I wasn’t offered a “Free CagePotato” t-shirt as a consolation prize.
RwilsonR- March 18, 2011 at 11:21 am
Good call danomite! Negative stereotypes built this site, and they will ultimately be what saves it from DW's wrath. Reinforce away.
RwilsonR- March 18, 2011 at 11:19 am
I had one after your one, LOKI. Not the same, but you probably got me thinking in that direction.
@ nickySudosroose - do you and your brother have a problem with my joke because you have 9 amateur fights under modified rules which makes you the expert? If not, hate away. Nothing is for everybody. I don't watch Mad Men, so I don't really get that one, but I assume it's funny because it's from EFB.
danomite- March 18, 2011 at 11:11 am
i think both of you had "separate but equal" jokes. CP should reinforce negative stereotypes by rewarding all 3 of us with "Free CagePotato" shirts and tickets to UFC 129.
LOKI- March 18, 2011 at 10:56 am
Not that it matters now but it was my 'Seperate but equal' joke.
nickyroose- March 18, 2011 at 10:51 am
Hate to Channel SudosHaterFC but seriously RWills? That was fucking terrible. A bay of pigs reference was good but the pornographic one? That was fucking terrible.
RwilsonR- March 18, 2011 at 10:46 am
Actually, I thought Dano's comment was pretty damn funny. I wish I was above cheap racial jokes...
RwilsonR- March 18, 2011 at 10:42 am
@ danomite - I didn't get your joke because I just don't see the world that way. All I saw were two men who are equal in every way, and skin color didn't even register. Oh yeah, I also saw four women who should put their guns down and make those two gentleman some sammiches.
El Guapo- March 18, 2011 at 10:26 am
MattHamillerTime is..

A)KarmaFliesFirstClass

B)The Mounty Killer

C)Fred Taquito
DangadaDang- March 18, 2011 at 10:13 am
I don't get how just because I didn't enter a caption automatically limits me from winning this. There has to be some other way.
newotnek- March 18, 2011 at 10:02 am
EFB gets me laughing everytime... may have a future is sitcoms or commercials.
intercept440- March 18, 2011 at 9:39 am
damn.. i was hoping for a shirt on that one...
i agree with burritos, an RWR captions .. but i didnt think matthamillertimes, was all that great.. grats though for everyone
ReX13- March 18, 2011 at 9:16 am
i've been informed that i didn't actually submit a comment for this, but whatever.
El Famous Burrito- March 18, 2011 at 9:04 am
I was really hoping they had some Hammer pants with skulls and dragons on them.
steampunk22- March 18, 2011 at 8:59 am
Sigh. ReX lets drown our sorrows in our already obtained CP Shirts.

;)
rlh61- March 18, 2011 at 8:53 am
ReX...I don't remember. I was pretty drunk when I discoverd it. I may have just poured beer all over my phone and called it good.
danomite- March 18, 2011 at 8:30 am
i laughed at RwilsonR's(i think it was him) separate but equal joke, I didn't even see this one. you guys are dicks for giving misscued 2 honorable mentions after he put in 30+ entries. hilarious dicks.
i can't believe my sesame street joke my sesame street joke didn't get honorable mention:
"one of these is not like the other thing
one of these things just doesn't belong..."
see? it's funny because it's racist.
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