MMA Fighter Challenges People to Punch Him in the Face, Everyone Fails

Barnburner Alert: Conor McGregor vs. Dustin Poirier a Go for UFC 178


(“No, I’d rather not fight Ronda Rousey at UFC 176. Why would you ask me that, Joe?” Photo via Getty.)

Maybe it’s just me, but people seem to be riding pretty high on this Conor McGregor character following his first round destruction of Diego Brandao at what Kevin Iole referred to as “the greatest UFC event of all time” with 100% sincerity. Great job, Kevin. I hope Dana gave you the week off for partaking in such blatant shillery.

Right, back to McGregor. Following his win over Brandao, the Irish phenom was called out by Dustin Poirier on Twitter, who had a late September matchup in mind. McGregor quickly agreed at the Fight Night 46 press conference, and as luck would have it, they are now set to meet at UFC 178: Jones vs. Gustafsson II on September 27th.

“The fights were good and the crowd loved the show.” — Kevin Iole, describing UFC 75 to his fullest capabilities before declaring Fight Night 46 as the greatest UFC event of all time. If you ever thought this MMA writing stuff was easy, you’re right.

I’m sorry, I keep getting off track. Anyway, here’s what Poirier had to say about McGregor and how he carries himself on The MMA Hour yesterday. Spoiler: It is not exactly a ringing endorsement.

I mean, come on man. The guy runs his mouth too much. Right off the bat I’m fired up about this guy. I’ve been in this division since the WEC merged (with UFC), I’ve paid my dues and I’ve stayed quiet and busted my ass day in and day out. I’ve won the fights that I’ve needed to win, I’ve had some tough fights. I feel like I need to be up there. I need to be up there where people are talking about me. His name in the same sentence as featherweight title should never come out of anybody’s mouth.

I can’t believe the hype this guy is getting man. I think he is over-hyped, no doubt about it, 100 percent. And to tell you the honest truth, I feel like I should be fighting Frankie Edgar, Chad Mendes and Cub Swanson again. I should be fighting the top guys. But, I’ve asked for those fights and I haven’t got them. What should I do?

The answer is simple, Dustin: Find yourself a big audience and then just start spewing nonsense until you become a commodity. It’s worked for all of the UFC’s heavy hitters: Rousey, Jones, Sonnen, Iole, and so on.

Look, I know everyone’s entitled to their own opinion, but calling Fight Night 46 the greatest UFC event of all time is just poppycock. Pure, unadulterated, poppycock. What has the UFC done with your soul, Iole? What are you going to tell me next, that the Phantom Menace is your favorite Star Wars movie? When you finished the final sentence of that article, did a single tear roll down your eye? Or have the years spent transforming from a legitimate reporter into a UFC PR robot eradicated your ability to emote? I DEMAND AN EXPLANATION, DAMN YOU.

………….

Also being rumored for UFC 178 is a welterweight showdown between top contenders Tarec Saffiedine and Rory MacDonald. The former is fresh off a decision win Hyun Gyu Lim in one of the greatest brawls of the year so far. The latter is on the heels of a dominant return to form over Tyron Woodley at UFC 174. So that should be fun.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go punch some trees in Minecraft until my Iole rage dissipates.

-J. Jones

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