(Ladies, you are not prepared to deal with Matt’s “O-face.” You just aren’t.)
Matt Riddle is on the fast track to replacing Michael Phelps as the most motivated stoner on the planet Earth, you guys. After fighting just once in 2011, Riddle put together a 3-1 record in 2012 (well, 2-1 and 1 NC if you’ve ever sucked dick for weed before) and already has his first fight for 2013 lined up. The man with one of the sunniest dispositions in the sport will be taking on butter-toothed Brit Che “Beautiful” Mills at UFC on FUEL 7, which goes down from the Wembley Arena in London, England on February 16th.
On the heels of a disappointing victory via injury over Duane Ludwig at UFC on FUEL 5, Mills will be looking to extend his octagon record to 3-1 with a victory over Riddle, who is fresh off a unanimous decision victory over John Maguire at UFC 154. Although Riddle has developed for putting on exciting brawls in his last few performances, he might want to avoid these kind of shenanigans against a power striker like Mills, who proved to Rick Flair-impersonator Chris Cope that he is not a fan of theatrics in his UFC debut.
And if you guys still give a shit about Strikeforce matchups, you’ll be happy to know that two-time almost title challenger Lorenz Larkin has been booked against a replacement opponent for the final Strikeforce card now that champion Luke Rockhold has bowed out again due to injury. Ironically, “Monsoon” will now meet the man who Rockhold took the title from, Ronaldo “Jacare” Souza, who is on the heels of a quick knockout over Derek Brunson at Strikeforce: Rousey vs. Kaufman.
Of course, we’re not really sure what they’re fighting for now that Michael Bisping has declared himself to be the “unofficial” Strikeforce middleweight champion. By that logic, Dan Henderson is…God?