(Arianny Celeste, pre-airbrushing.)
LAS on "How’s Taste My Clay-Pee-Pee?": This will be the best toy ever for the first 3 minutes before it breaks, at which point you will really regret paying 5x as much as you should have for it.
email@example.com on "Scott ‘LionHeart’ Blevins Cannot be Stopped": Guys Got more Balls, Then Anyone Ive Scene Leave a Comment on this, Guy,..Hes Talented by Heart and at UFC, Thats the Kinda Guy we Are Currently Looking for,,He can do the 145 Class,,Really,..Hes 130 but Fights alot of Over Weight Guys,..So I Beleive I Be in Touch with Mr.LionHeart,.Hes Got me Added on Myspace so I Beleive I will do that! Contract it is,Contract it be,.
[Ed. note: Look, I know this wasn't written by the real Dana White; I shouldn't even have to say that. But whether it was written by a Scott Blevins fan, or LionHeart himself, or a snarky CagePotato reader pretending to be Scott pretending to be Dana White (and if so, well done sir), all I can tell you is that "Contract it is,Contract it be,." made me LOL so hard that I immediately set it as my new e-mail signature.]
manutdfan on "Arianny Celeste: Yep, Still Hot": Here we are, Potato Nation, huddled around our glowing screens, ripping apart photographs of a woman that 99.99% of us will never have the chance to land (no, TUF Guy, you are not that .01%). At the end of the day, we shall retire from our cubicles (or ESL class), go home to our shitty hovels we call ‘home’, and think "Well, I really pwned on the comment section today, calling out that airbrush job on AC!" Then our mother’s voice calls out, "Jimmy, get outta the bathroom and come to dinner. Why you stay in there so long, I don’t wanna know!"
Instead, just enjoy the pics, and be happy the Bens bring us such joy.
[Ed. note: *wipes away tear*]