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CagePotato PSA: Movember Is Coming, And We Need You on Our Team

(And here we have Ronda Rousey putting one of Mike Beltran‘s braided moustache-chains in her mouth. Damn, that is sexy… / Photo via TitoCouture)

Maybe you’re at work right now. Maybe you’re eating lunch, or riding public transportation. No matter where you are or what you’re up to, I’d like you do something for me — reach into your pants and check to see if you have two healthy, fully-functioning testicles. (Yes, even you, angrylittlefeet.) If everything is in order, pat yourself on the back. Unfortunately, not every man is so lucky. I’m not trying to turn this site into, but did you know that testicular cancer is the most common cancer in American males between the ages of 15 and 35? And that over 8,500 men will be diagnosed with the disease this year? And that about 360 men will die of it?

Hell, did you know that 1 in 6 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in his lifetime, and that approximately 242,000 new cases of that disease will be diagnosed in 2012? You probably didn’t know any of this, which is fine, but now you do know, and if you feel like doing something about it, we should talk.

For the second year in a row, is partnering up with Movember to spread awareness and raise money for testicular cancer, prostate cancer, and other men’s health issues. If you want to help us in this month-long quest, here’s what you need to do:

Step 1: Register yourself at

Step 2: Join our Movember Team at

Step 3: On November 1st, shave whatever fuzz is hanging around on your upper lip, then don’t shave for the rest of November (henceforth referred to as “Movember.”)

Step 4: Recruit your friends though Facebook, Twitter, G+, and plain old word-of-mouth, directing them to your Movember web page and asking if they could donate a few bucks for the cause — or better yet, join the team. Remember, your mo’ is your membership card, and a sign of your advocacy. Let it be a conversation starter; if anybody asks what the hell you’re trying to do with that creepy thing, tell them what it means and why it’s important to you.

Mo’ do’s and don’ts: Your facial hair shouldn’t connect at the sideburns — that’s a beard. No hair can connect at the chin — that’s a goatee. A patch below the mouth is acceptable, in accordance with the 1974 Flavor Saver Laws.

PRIZES!: We will award the leading fundraiser on Mo’tato Nation a $100 gift card to StubHub, as well as matching an additional $100 to their fundraising total. The most glorious-looking moustache on the Mo’tato Nation team — as selected by CP’s editors — will win a $50 StubHub gift card.

Any questions, let us know in the comments section. In the meantime, please registerjoin our team, and come back on Movember 1st for opening ceremonies.


Cagepotato Comments

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angry little feet- October 16, 2012 at 10:08 am
On your advise, I did indeed reach down and investigate my crotchtoral area. Thankfully, I am still a woman so all is well down yonder.
This is a great cause. I donated last year and will again this year - however I have already sworn my allegiance to Team-Karma.
RSparrow- October 16, 2012 at 2:11 am
Jesus Christ Dead Cow, that's pretty serious! So is that whole sentence...

poor cows get that blow thing in their head.. But its better that way...

look where that went... ummm...GO OVEREEM!
The_Dead_Cow- October 15, 2012 at 5:33 pm
I already have testicular cancer and one nut because of it, so I'm exempt. Have fun with your moustaches....dickhead's
Mr_Misanthropy- October 15, 2012 at 5:04 pm
1 out of 1 humans will catch a fatal case of birth induced death at some point in their short insignificant lifetimes.
RwilsonR- October 15, 2012 at 2:59 pm
I think I might need Carmen to do a quick reach around inspection for me... just to be sure.
jimbonics- October 15, 2012 at 2:57 pm

Where you can grow one or the other or both.
Mr_Misanthropy- October 15, 2012 at 5:07 pm
What's the name of the month where you get to punch everyone sporting a chin strap right in the face?
El Guapo- October 15, 2012 at 2:42 pm
In Canada, they call mustaches Candian pubes.
El Guapo- October 15, 2012 at 2:42 pm
Not to be confused with Canadian pubes, which is what they call goatees.
Alan K- October 15, 2012 at 2:36 pm
If I win can I get a lock of Beltran's stache, or a replica or something?
shatterproof- October 15, 2012 at 1:26 pm
ah horseshit. cant join team PoMo, presumably because i'm Canadian where our 'staches are far too masculine and powerful to compete with the whimsical whiskers of our dainty southern brothers.
shatterproof- October 15, 2012 at 1:16 pm
Viva... you mean Decembeard?
Viva Hate- October 15, 2012 at 1:44 pm
bravo, I say bravo good chap
The12ozCurls- October 15, 2012 at 1:02 pm
Thank God for the 1974 Flavor Saver Laws or I would look like a pederast. But count me in - I have been looking for a way to save a few bucks and if that means not buying razors or pretending to be homeless and panhandling - so be it.
Viva Hate- October 15, 2012 at 12:53 pm
It is a shame that in order to participate you have to spend a month looking like a damn hipster or a diddler. Bring on BEARDVEMBER my friends!
Fried Taco- October 15, 2012 at 1:14 pm
Or Pedovember, as some people refer to it. Hey little girl, do you want to touch my moustache?
Fried Taco- October 15, 2012 at 12:30 pm
I always knew you guys were nuthuggers!

When people ask why my upper lip is dirty, can I whip out my balls while I explain it to them? Without getting arrested? Again?