In celebration of the possibility that deplorable scumbag Joe Son may be getting the death penalty, we’ve decided to update our blatantly outdated “Most Despicable People in MMA” list in the form of our newest roundtable discussion. Read on for our picks, and please continue to send your ideas for future Roundtable topics to firstname.lastname@example.org.
MMA can be a sordid, awful business — a wretched hive of scum and villainy, as Obi-Wan Kenobi would say. Some characters are worse than others though. The classless fighters and “let me bang bro” douchebags that litter the landscape are only small time. The real people you need to watch out for are the promoters, for they’re the ones pulling the strings, greasing the wheels, and killing the dogs.
Yes, killing dogs. You read that right. And that’s the main reason why I have to throw Bjorn Rebney’s name into the “who is the most despicable person in MMA” discussion: He was allegedly involved in the brutal murder of a rival’s dog.
It’s quite a tale so here’s the abridged version: Back in Rebney’s boxing promotion days, he was partners with a man named Seth Ersoff. Eventually, they found themselves at odds and a lawsuit developed. As Ringtalk noted, the situation escalated and somehow Ersoff’s dog wound up with a metal spike through its head.
But there’s no definitive proof of Rebney murdering this poor, innocent dog, so I can’t judge him solely on that action — something that he might not have been responsible for. But there are other bad actions that make him a perfect candidate for CagePotato’s “Worst Human Being in MMA” award.
First, he sued Sugar Ray Leonard’s company, Sugar Ray Leonard Boxing, into oblivion in 2004. Like all legal struggles, this one was kind of messy and each side claimed they had the right of it. Leonard said that Rebney was “a cancer” and that the company could’ve blossomed but Rebney ruined it. Rebney asserted that it was Leonard’s fault. Rebney said that Leonard turning his back on the promotion bearing his name to sign a deal with NBC’s The Contender is what made the company come crashing down.
Second, Rebney seems to love the questionable oddities of the Bellator roster, the ones that lack moral turpitude. The most egregious example is War Machine. Remember the “rape tweet” debacle? Remember Bjorn Rebney’s pathetic, flaccid statement about it? Oh, and did you see Rebney’s reaction to War Machine’s tweet about how glad he was to pass by a cop’s funeral the other day? No? Well that’s because he didn’t respond to it all. Apparently, Rebney is cool with it.
Third, Rebney is just as petulant as Dana White, if not more so. I mean, claiming that an imposter is offering contracts to guys who don’t want to fight for you? Kind of jerk-ish, Bjorn!
Then, of course, there’s the whole Eddie Alvarez thing. Personally, I don’t demonize Rebney for this since it was just a business move. Why would he let one of his only known, talented fighters slip away to a competitor?
Even without the Eddie Alvarez lawsuit, that’s still some pretty strong evidence for Bjorn being a real d-list: He allegedly murdered a dog, he’s got a history of shady litigation, he doesn’t care that there’s a weird, brash criminal in his employment making his company look bad, and he can be a bit of an asshole sometimes.
Word association is a fun and educational game that can be used to deepen the bonds of family and friendships — well, unless you drunkenly blurt out “My filthy whore of a wife” when the word ‘skank’ is in play. In that case it could create quite a tense situation. For the most part though, it’s a constructive activity that unites, not divides. And because the possibilities are endless, it can be applied to any genre and is great fun for all age groups.
In MMA, for instance, if we said “unevolved cranium,” you might think of Tito Ortiz. If we said “self-righteous Bible thumper,” you might choose Matt Hughes. You get the point.
Now, who immediately comes to mind when we say “festering dickbag?”
If you said Michael Bisping then you’ve been paying attention and win a prize. Well okay, no you don’t actually win a prize, but dammit you do merit a prize. So the next time you’re at the boardwalk arcade and you spend $300 collecting those stupid little prize tickets and all you can get with them is either a back scratcher or a Velcro wallet, just think of it as a gift from your good pals here at CP. We care.
So, why is Bisping a dick? Oh you jest. Everyone from the no-nonsense Dan Henderson, to the batshit crazy Jason Miller, to the old man Jorge Rivera has put Bisping on blast as a total dick. Hell, Rivera even made a YouTube video about it. Guys Bisping hasn’t even fought, such as Hector Lombard, have described Bisping as a dick after “The Count” attacked his height. Little did Bisping realize at the time though that he was about to be served with a vicious comeback. Lombard described an encounter where he shook Bisping’s “little girl hands,” which everyone knows is just an indirect way of implying that a guy has a crayon dick. Game. Set. Match.
Bisping deserves every bit of hate he receives. The man is simply incapable of talking smack like a regular fighter. He even took aim at the 125 pounders for having the temerity to respond to his initial attacks — and that’s really the story of Bisping. He loves to dish it out but he can’t take it. Plus, he’s arrogant and hypocritical about his dickishness. Before his loss to Vitor Belfort, Bisping became enraged when Vitor called him a “hooligan” in a press conference, and used that as a justification to take the customary shit-talking down a few notches — as if Bisping could even come close to taking the moral high-ground when it comes to bad-mouthing an opponent.
But what really set him apart from the crowd was UFC 127. Calling Jorge Rivera a “faggot mother fucker” was the least messed up thing he did that weekend. There was the blatantly intentional knee to a downed Rivera’s grill, spitting at Rivera’s corner, then getting in his defeated foe’s face and demanding an apology for making him act like a such a gargantuan dick. Granted, Jorge instigated the situation with his YouTube videos mocking Bisping. And a response was certainly in order. But the knee, the spitting, I mean shit, who does that?
You see, there is a huge divide between a garden variety asshole and being a dick. Being a dick is a natural state and requires intrinsic features that not everyone possesses. You just have to have a way about you; a smugness; an aura of douchiness that’s difficult to explain but impossible to miss, that makes likeability a virtual impossibility. An asshole has to put forth some effort. For a dick, it just comes naturally.
Bisping came up in an era when TUF winners were coddled with main card billing and hand-fed opponents to build them up as contenders. Yeah, he’s a very good fighter — 14-5 in the UFC — but he’s fallen against every top tier opponent they’ve put him against. In fact, the only Top 10 fighter Bisping has beaten is Brian Stann, and Stann’s placement on that list was largely due to a victory over the supremely overrated Jorge Santiago. Yet still, Bisping has this dickish sense of entitlement about where he actually stands in the division, often saying he’s paid his dues and deserves a title shot. Forget that he loses to every great fighter he faces. That’s an inconvenient fact, and those are easily brushed aside by dicks the world over.
Lately ”The Count” has been employing a less pugnacious strategy. He’s kind of like a psychotic Eddie Haskell – saying the right things in front of the right company, but you just know that innate dickishness is lurking very close to the surface, dying to get out. My guess is someone got in his ear after the Rivera incident and basically told him that it’s good to be kind of a dick. Hell, Bisping is one of highest paid guys in the UFC because of it. But being such a humungous, ooze festering dick may not be the best way to proceed.
Luckily we have this to watch over and over and over again to make it all okay. Thank you, Dan Henderson, for providing us with this beautiful highlight, especially the totally unnecessary diving forearm smash. Because hey, one dick move deserves another.
Really, you guys? You think Baby Bjorn or Count Bisping are the most despicable people in MMA because they what, intentionally destroy the occasional fighter’s career or say some nasty things about flyweights?
In 2010, Jarrod Wyatt got high on mushroom tea, cut out his friend’s heart and tongue and peeled the skin off his face. Police described the scene as “Like Lost Highway but with significantly less eroticism.” Wyatt had just one amateur fight to his credit, but that didn’t stop every newspaper, online publication, radio station, television station, train station and Brownsville Station song from referring to him as “an MMA fighter.” Therefore, he is one of us. The living embodiment of Stephen Crane’s “In the Desert” is one of us. And he makes Joe Son look like a pussy.
In the desert
I saw a creature, naked, bestial,
Who, squatting upon the ground,
Held his heart in his hands,
And ate of it.
I said, “Is it good, friend?”
“It is bitter—bitter,” he answered;
“But I like it
“Because it is bitter,
“And because it is my heart.”
Quinton Jackson is a villain who’s convinced he’s a superhero. Never in the history of the sport has there been a bigger bully with a bigger persecution complex. He’s an excuse maker, a tormentor of the weak, a failed comedian, and a self-proclaimed fan-favorite who hasn’t put in an impressive performance in almost five years. (Seriously. Since his knockout of Wanderlei Silva in 2008, his only stoppage victory has been against a door.) Rampage’s best-known interviews involve humping a reporter and humping another reporter and slapping a reporter and motorboating a reporter in front of her husband. His close loss to Forrest Griffin in July 2008 blew his mind so thoroughly that he temporarily went insane — or “dehydrated,” as celebrities call it — which led to a vehicular stampede that ended with a woman accusing him of killing her unborn child. Not that any of that shit was his fault or anything.
Among MMA stars, Rampage’s profound level of self-delusion is only matched by Tito Ortiz and Nick Diaz. And while those guys have done plenty to embarrass themselves and the sport, Quinton Jackson has always come across as a broader threat to humanity, because he has a history of being actively hostile to those around him. His reaction to seeing a tiger in captivity is to hump it, for God’s sake, egged on by the ever-present giggles of his sidekick, Tiki.
I have a separate theory on Rampage’s unearned “funny guy” persona. At some point early in his career, terrified Japanese people and terrified white people began laughing nervously at everything Jackson said or did, in order to avoid a potential raping. Emboldened by the laughter, he became convinced that he’s a comic genius. (Mike Tyson’s post-boxing career has followed the same arc, by the way.) Still, that doesn’t explain how in the fuck Rampage ever thought he had musical talent.
Bobby Green recently told a story about how he met Rampage and told ‘Page he was a big fan; Rampage responded by talking shit about Green as soon as he left the room. He’s a crybaby, a conspiracy theorist, a candy cheat, the polar opposite of everything that comes to mind when we think “fighter.” Viacom bought a lemon. Professional wrestling can keep him.
I am breaking a pseudo-CagePotato ban right now, but this is NOT a troll piece by any means. This is the elephant in the room that nobody wanted to mention, and because a wise man insinuated that I probably have “nothing to lose and no reputation to worry about,” I will be the one jumping on this grenade. So allow me to just come right out and say it: Fallon Fox belongs on the list of despicable people in MMA.
This is neither a case of gender equality nor equal opportunity, and it hardly has anything at all to do with the fact that Fox is a transgender fighter competing in women’s MMA. It also has nothing to do with my personal beliefs concerning her punching other women for a living even though she still has both X&Y chromosomes. The reality is that Fox came out publicly on March 5, 2013 just prior to some confusion about her licensing between the California State Athletic Commission and the Florida Athletic Commission.
Did she come out publicly on her own accord? Maybe.
Was her hand forced because she lied/incorrectly claimed on her Florida MMA licensure that she was already licensed in California and the information was going to become public due to the licensing issues? Possibly.
Did she already (T)KO two opponents who had no knowledge that she was born as Boyd Burton? Absolutley, and that is the part that is despicable.
Although she has been licensed in Florida since her revelation — and she claims to be in compliance with the International Olympic Committee’s rules on postoperative transsexuals — it doesn’t change the fact that two competitors had no idea that she walked around as a man for 31 years prior to her medical procedures. Fox beat both Alisha Helsper via TKO (injury) and Ericka Newsome via KO (knee) when neither had any inclination of Fox’s past. Sure, Hesper and Newsome may have still fought Fox had they known all the facts, but it is appalling that they were never given a chance to weigh all the variables and make that decision themselves.
After The Queen of Swords made her medical history public, her next opponent, Peggy “The Daywalker” Morgan, promptly backed out of their upcoming bout — making it clear that she was under the impression that Fox had a physical advantage. In a previous CP post, Morgan is quoted in a statement from Relentless Sports Marketing saying:
Until I am presented with conclusive evidence that a fight with Fallon would, in fact, be fair, I will not be entering the cage with her.
Morgan was replaced by willing participant Allana Jones. Jones lost to Fox via third round submission, but sprinkled into that bout were several Koscheck-esque eye pokes by Fallon as well as a perceived cheap shot by Fox during a “mutual” glove tap. Several weeks after Fox defeated Jones, Invicta FC strawweight Bec Hyatt came forward with an interesting story about Fox doing a decent Nick Diaz impression at the hotel some of the fighters were staying at prior to the Invicta FC 5 event.
Though these last few details are trivial in comparison to Fox’s lack of full disclosure during the beginning of her MMA career, I believe a picture has already begun to paint itself and it isn’t pretty. Albeit I have never “wrapped her in my arms,” Fox seems to have earned her spot on this list even if there are those that turn a blind eye to her prior indiscretions and simply want to champion her efforts as progress. That is pretty despicable, too.
I don’t know why I’m even bothering to contribute at this point. For one, I’m pretty sure that everyone stopped reading after Nate picked Fallon Fox and ran straight for the comments section. I could write pretty much anything here, throw in a semi-related GIF (as I often do), and no one would call me on it. And even if anyone actually is still reading this, as far as I’m concerned, the “Who is the most despicable person in MMA?” mystery was already solved months ago by none other than…Nate Diaz?
I mean, just look at that tweet up there. What sort of douchebag justifies battery as “the consequence for acting like a dude?” If you answered “that rare breed of douchebag who elbows a woman in the back of the head at a UFC weigh in,” then go ahead and pat yourself on the back, because you figured out exactly where I was going with that one.
Granted, there’s no concrete evidence that he intentionally elbowed Cat Zingano in the back of the head before the TUF 17 Finale, but Caraway’s complete lack of an apology — or even an explanation of what actually happened — paints a pretty ugly picture: We have a guy who elbowed a woman in the back of the head who openly admits that he thinks it’s okay to hit a woman who “acts like a dude.” No wonder there are whispers that he might be abusive towards Miesha Tate (who, let’s be real here, is way too hot to be stuck with him).
Add on his painfully holier-than-thou attitude towards marijuana usage (which may be complete bullshit, by the way), and there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that Nate Diaz hit the nail on the head when he pegged Bryan Caraway as the biggest fa-
Do you have a dishonorable mention? Let us know in the comments section.