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Calm Down Everyone, Brock Lesnar is NOT Coming Back to the UFC


(HELL YES I’D LIKE SECONDS. Photo via Getty.)

You gotta love us MMA media types. All we need is a snippet of not news to throw our spin on and suddenly, the internet is afire with ridiculous rumors based on the smallest semblance of evidence. Take the current “reports” of a potential Brock Lesnar return to the UFC. When asked about the possibility of seeing Lesnar (who will be in attendance at UFC 168) making a triumphant octagon return at the UFC 168 scrum, here was DW’s *verbatim* response:

I honestly don’t know. Honestly. I don’t know.

That’s it. Yet what headline is dominating every MMA website out there? Oh, something along the lines of “Is Brock Lesnar returning to the UFC?”, citing the exact quote I just provided you with. Well allow me to answer the question on (apparently) everyone’s mind for you: No, dumb-dumb, Brock Lesnar is NOT coming back to the UFC. Here’s why:

While it’s a given that “honestly” is a somewhat skewed term in the mind of Dana White (often out of necessity), you’d have to be a fool to buy into these rumors. If you recall, Lesnar retired after getting beat down by Alistair Overeem at UFC 141 at the end of 2011. Why exactly? Because, as Lesnar stated, “[Overeem] was just that much better than me.” It should be noted that Overeem has not scored a UFC win since. Lesnar entered the UFC’s heavyweight division at a time when a natural light heavyweight (and current movie star) was champion, and nowadays, the skill level of the division is arguably the highest it has ever been. Which makes it all the more impressive that Cain Velasquez, the man who humiliated Lesnar in their previous title fight at UFC 121, is still dominating the division he would be attempting to reclaim.

But maybe Lesnar isn’t coming back for a title run. Maybe he just wants a one-off fight/cash grab to fill the void left behind by Georges St. Pierre. No, just no. You see, Lesnar is in this place in his career where his popularity actually serves as a detriment when compared to his skill level. He’s a high-profile fighter who can’t hang with high-level fighters. Could you honestly see the 36 year-old Lesnar standing a chance against the likes of Junior Dos Santos or Josh Barnett? And if not them, then who? Brendan Schaub? Pat Barry? His old pal Roy Nelson? Lesnar is a marquee kind of fighter based on his name alone, but there’s simply no fighter in the UFC’s heavyweight division that it would make any sense to match him up with. Unless you want to see him fight Frank Mir again, which, come on.

Further quelling these rumors is the fact that, in his post-fight speech at UFC 141, Lesnar also mentioned his continuing struggles with diverticulitis as a reason for his retirement, This is perhaps the most telling statement of them all. Simply put, there is no way in hell that Lesnar is going to risk his health again to make less money than he is currently making in the WWE.

OK, so we have an incredibly vague response from DW at a media scrum, the fact that Lesnar is not up to par with the current heavyweight division, and some diverticulitis thrown in for good measure. I’m going to go as far as to say that if Lesnar returns to the UFC, I will down a bottle of ipecac, as is tradition.

-J. Jones

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