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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Caption Contest: Chuck Likes Meat, Guida the Mime and Forrest’s Groupie Downgrade


(Hover-hands… making UFC fighters not seem like germophobes since 1993.)

We realized we haven’t had a good old fashioned caption contest in a while, so to make it up to you guys we figured we’d do three for the price of one. That way you can pick your favorite photo to mercilessly carve, rather than having us disappoint you by choosing one that dries out your creative juices. And you say that we never listen.

You know the drill. Come up with your best captions for these three Tracy Lee photos from last weekend’s “It Ain’t Chemo” fundraiser. Best one for each pic gets a CP devil horns or HOF T-shirt. One prize limit per entrant.

And….GO!


(“I still don’t get how the bacon grows inside the chicken.”)

 


(“Sorry Clay, I only date guys who do hard stand-up sparring four days a week.”)

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MMAFAN1988- February 13, 2012 at 9:53 am
1. Planet of the Apes: THE Blonde BIMBO TAKEOVER the final chapter starring forret Griffin and Andrew Dice clay(supporting actor in the back).
2. "This looks chewey, let me call Rich n see if he still has my teeth"
3. Sorry I feel awkword standing can we do this interview laying down?
KeithHackneyWindmillPalmStrike- February 13, 2012 at 4:40 am
1.) I AM a motorboatin' son of a bitch, aren't I?
2.) You just spilled my PBR you sonnabitch
3.) The robot...scientifically the quickest way into a woman's pants
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kingsac- February 10, 2012 at 8:41 pm
1. Forrest pictured with two friends at the annual "Hey..wait a minute" competition at Jake's Gay Bar in San Francisco, CA.

2. Chuck Liddel is shown the new career of "chicken mule" at the Las Vegas Job Fair 2012.

3. Clay learns the "stinky thumb" from local wrestling star Jean "Four Finger" McCloud.
HabitualLineStepper- February 10, 2012 at 7:13 pm
Liddell: "Well I'm just gonna have to double up on my naked treadmilling this week after eating all this s**t."
HabitualLineStepper- February 10, 2012 at 7:08 pm
I hope these skeezers aren't Brazilian. If so, you know Forrest went down at some point that night.
HabitualLineStepper- February 10, 2012 at 6:22 pm
When challenged to a dance off by Scary Spice, Clay Guida responds in typical white guy fashion... by busting out a nervous, uncoordinated robot dance.
HabitualLineStepper- February 10, 2012 at 6:19 pm
Man how I envy you Chuck. I wish I got to live in a world where undershirts aren't necessary, disheveled mohawks were acceptable and I was supplied with unlimited amounts of booger sugar and kabobs.
The12ozCurls- February 10, 2012 at 11:18 am
Forrest: "I have a sneaking suspecion that after I take this picture with these two skanks that the loser in the backwards trucker hat is gonna want one too."
.................................................................. Chuck: "Holy smokes! I have never seen skewered bacon-wrapped klonopin before. Bravo!" .......................................................... Clay: "Pull my finger"
pfid- February 10, 2012 at 11:01 am
Bodog odds: Griffin (+810), drug resistant gonorrhea (-740)
J-Dog- February 10, 2012 at 10:50 am
1. When the sh!t goes down, I'll use these as life preservers to float out the flood. 2) Chuck: sorry I'm not into cannibalism - those look like my legs! 3) Clay: Bitch went to the same hair stylist! I'll have to go somewhere else for the Christmas party.
J. Spaceman- February 10, 2012 at 10:09 am
#2 Sir, these chicken breasts were cooked until their internal temperature reached 165 and then wrapped in bacon, just the way your city busses like them.
MadMikeAssimilation- February 10, 2012 at 9:56 am
Forest: Beauty and the beasts.

Chuck: The awkward moment when the server brings more food at the exact moment you come.

Clay: Karyn " Clay, i am an excellent ventriloquist''
J. Spaceman- February 10, 2012 at 9:51 am
#2 What did you call those again? Chicken Breasts? Hey everybody! This dumbass thinks chickens have boobs!
R955- February 10, 2012 at 9:50 am
#1 They might be kinda ugly, and they might have fake boobs, and they might do porn, but seriously, who wants to be me right now?

#2 I am a vagaterian! take this away immediately!

#3 using the Recardo Montelbon voice "Do you see the bulge in my pants? Do you see what you do to me? Perhaps I should take you to fantasy island."
J. Spaceman- February 10, 2012 at 9:50 am
#2 You're telling me that, when Paul Harris was here, he made you go back and get the full chicken so he could rip the legs off himself?
J. Spaceman- February 10, 2012 at 9:49 am
#1. The smug look of self satisfaction comes from knowing that, even though his career has taken a downturn, he can still get hotter women than one that looks like Dennis Hallman lost another bet or one that looks like she needs Karma to drain the cauliflower from her tits.
pockets- February 10, 2012 at 9:25 am
Haha @ GenZod, very clever...

1. Girl on left tweets Forrest "lol NO! Rape is the new doggystyle"

3. Karyn Bryant standing in at 5'10', Guida at 5'5', and everything else is VIRTUALLY IDENTICAL. No, Goldie, just no.
HabitualLineStepper- February 10, 2012 at 9:09 am
Unfortunately, Forrest had to come uncomfortably close to these two carps in order to take this picture. On the flip side, the picture confirmed his suspicions that Chaz Bono has been stalking him.
tommyboy76- February 10, 2012 at 8:41 am
Chuck " Baby Ruth"
MaryHall- February 10, 2012 at 8:19 am
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wiv-honors- February 10, 2012 at 7:16 am
Clay Guida, frozen in a state of shock when he learned he wasn't the only one in the room with long, curly hair
wiv-honors- February 10, 2012 at 7:13 am
Forrest Griffin follows his own advice on surviving the apocalypse by securing two sets of flotation devices, in case of heavy rain.
fatbellyfrank- February 10, 2012 at 7:09 am
@ SEANMCCORKLESBRUISEDEGO, your the one who videoed the whole thing ya dumb felching fucker, and yeah, fuck the cunts at BE goat fucker asshole fucks they fucken suck
Viva Hate- February 10, 2012 at 6:12 am
Make sure you pick up Forrest’s new book “How to Survive a Tranny Apocalypse”
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