Caption Contest: Win a ‘Five Principles’ T-Shirt From Tokyo Five! |

Joedirt- April 4, 2010 at 6:24 pm

Joe Rogan introduces Michael Phelps for his first MMA match...

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HEADBUSSA765- March 27, 2010 at 12:14 pm

Vera: " BV phone home"

Rogan: "Oh, shit he thinks he's ET again. Dude, hand me that blanket"

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TheFanciness- March 26, 2010 at 12:43 am

After having his face broken in his last fight, Brandon Vera decided to become a spokesmodel for Nair. Joe Rogan is not a spokesmodel for Nair.

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fingerssfv- March 26, 2010 at 12:18 am

I THINK THE WAY OUT IS OVER THERE. AT LEAST, THAT AMBULANCE IS OVER THERE.

Or:
Rogan: "No, Brandon, I think you have to go in this direction".

Or:
Rogan: "Jonny Bones, you had your moment. It's Brandon's turn now".

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Uncle cestus- March 25, 2010 at 8:32 pm

He's smiling on the outside, but the weigh in performance of "YMCA" has been joyless since War Machine left.

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Bubbaduncan- March 25, 2010 at 7:26 pm

Looks like his orbital bone wasn`t the only bone getting attention.

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Bubbaduncan- March 25, 2010 at 7:23 pm

Joe: ``Brandon, I know you`re excited that the Phillipino replacement singer for Journey is at the weigh ins..... But this dude over here is ready to break your face.``

Jon Jones: ``Don`t stop believing that, son.

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Burghamber- March 25, 2010 at 5:49 pm

One of you camera men is going to have to step up and get a close up of it. You there? How about you?

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Ajax- March 25, 2010 at 3:35 pm

*10 minutes after Rogan and Vera dropped some acid backstage*

Rogan: "Dude I'm freaking out, do you see bubbles floating around in here?"
Vera: "HAHA, I just popped that one right before it got out of reach."

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closedminded- March 25, 2010 at 3:01 pm

Brandon Vera, once again vowing to return to his old self, slips into a pair of shorts he wore throughout the entirety of the first grade.

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Eljroco- March 24, 2010 at 8:46 pm

Suddenly Master Toddy yelling "Now Cobra" at Kerry Vera took on a whole new meaning

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hotsaucemonster- March 24, 2010 at 8:29 pm

yo Rothwell please hook a brother up

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montanamonster- March 24, 2010 at 5:07 pm

The dude from Survivor finally has his break out fight even though he is battling cancer. First UFC event sanctioned in the third world.

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Murdock- March 24, 2010 at 2:11 pm

Tiger Woods probably hit that too..

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youngblood- March 24, 2010 at 1:42 pm

"Now can I get my prescription refilled here in Colorado to make the Nightmares go away? I don't know if I can smoke enought of what I brought with me... Quick, Fatty Hogwatcher get me the double bubble and I will let you take a peek and what is behind curtain number 3."

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Fried Taco- March 24, 2010 at 12:22 pm

Brandon's coaches knew they were in trouble when, during the Hokey Pokey, Joe Rogan said "Put your left hand in..."

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Fried Taco- March 24, 2010 at 12:02 pm

Vera: "Number one big penis right here!"

Rogan: "Actually, I think Bones' penis is much bigger than yours."

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Fried Taco- March 24, 2010 at 12:00 pm

Rogan: "How about you, sir, would you like to pull his finger?"

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newotnek- March 24, 2010 at 10:39 am

A failed attempt to show that speedos are not just for losers and European tourists.

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newotnek- March 24, 2010 at 10:23 am

Brandon Vera and Joe Rogan mess up while filming a Subway "five dollar foot long" commercial... again.

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newotnek- March 24, 2010 at 10:10 am

Who's a has been fighter claiming to be back to his old ways thats about to get his face smashed in a day or so?

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MIRJITSU- March 24, 2010 at 7:33 am

Joe Rogan: "Our next fighter to be auctioned...Brandon "the Truth" Vera. Bids starting at one dolla ...and a one and a one...I've got one...I'm looking for one fiddy....one fiddy...humina humina one fiddy..... I got one fiddy.......any more bids..going once..going twice..>SOLD! to the heft lady with the chinstrap beard for one fiddy...oh wait.. that is Jon Bones Jones' momma!!

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P2- March 24, 2010 at 5:22 am

SNEAK PEAK OF "ZOOLANDER 2:" Worried that Derek is looking a little puffy and hungover, Billy Zane decides to take his close friend's place in the upcoming "walk-off."

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Durden- March 24, 2010 at 5:02 am

Kojak is back from the dead and he's gonna get to the bottom of this pants stealing business that has gone out of hand at the weigh-ins!

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Big Fox- March 24, 2010 at 4:15 am

Vera "See Joe if I suck in my gut my little dick looks bigger, Up there you see Big Country knows what I am talking about!"
Joe "Yeah but all the ring girls are fucking throwing up man.. LOOK"

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Lek- March 24, 2010 at 1:44 am

Rogan: "No, I want the red one with the CHOCOLATE glaze on it... yeah, with the sprinkles..."
Vera: posture straight...check, hips out... check "Joe, shut up, you're taking the attention away from my package...", smiling... check, not too cocky... check

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Lek- March 24, 2010 at 1:33 am

Vera: "Full effort is full victory!"
Rogan: "Hey check out the cans on that bimbo..."

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Lek- March 24, 2010 at 1:27 am

Vera: "All praise Allah, who will bring me to victory!"
Rogn: "Hey Dana, can you pass me my water. I don't think I can talk anymore until I get rid of this cotton mouth."

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DAVE2thaBIZZLE- March 23, 2010 at 9:54 pm

Joe: "Dude, like f**k'n clock work! Every single weigh-in Dana stares at the fighter's junk through the f**k'n mirror!"

Brandon: "Like what you see dana? I told you, Pacquaio ain't Packin like me! Shout out to my new training partner in the back. What's good Lights Out?!"

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newotnek- March 23, 2010 at 7:32 pm

The correct answer is 1 ladies and gentlemen, one tube sock stuffed in those tiny little panties.

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Fear Itself- March 23, 2010 at 7:01 pm

Vera: "One more...I'll drop one more weight class, then you'll see who's the best!"

Rogan: "He's over there...Anderson-Something"

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kmfdmkid- March 23, 2010 at 5:45 pm

Brandon, likely pointing to Kerry or a fan. Joe Rogan, likely pointing at the 4 footer bong.

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DangadaDang- March 23, 2010 at 5:43 pm

How sad, Vera just hasn't had his hand raised in victory for so long that he's started doing it on his own these days

And Poor Joe Rogan, on yet another 3 day binge of DMT and Muscle Milk, is still trying to convince the audience that there are tiny green goblins sitting in the 3rd row

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Cestus84- March 23, 2010 at 4:14 pm

Vera: Even my fans way up there heard my face break.
Joe: Yup, and now there goes your UFC career.

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G Funk- March 23, 2010 at 3:17 pm

Extenze works for me?!

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JonD- March 23, 2010 at 3:15 pm

Vera points to his one last supporter. Rogan points towards a better alternative, Jones, the guy that fan should support.

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G Funk- March 23, 2010 at 3:13 pm

...ha ha ah ha stayin alive stayin alive

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iloveto69- March 23, 2010 at 3:12 pm

Joe and Vera pointing at the direction in which they believe they saw Puff the Magic Dragon

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JonD- March 23, 2010 at 3:09 pm

Seen here; Vera pointing to his one remaining fan, Rogan directing that fan to the closest exit.

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therussianglamourpuss- March 23, 2010 at 2:47 pm

Brandon, the Thunder From Down Under auditions are being held in Vegas this year, about 800 miles THAT-A-WAY.

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therussianglamourpuss- March 23, 2010 at 2:41 pm

Most fans believe Brandon Vera's tattoos hold religious significance, but the only thing The Truth does religiously is frequent his body waxer.

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therussianglamourpuss- March 23, 2010 at 2:33 pm

Brandon Vera and Joe Rogan solicit oil maidens from the crowd in homage to the late, great "Ravishing" Rick Rude.

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BearCTC- March 23, 2010 at 2:31 pm

Little is known about Michael Phelp's sex change as Joe Rogan pleads to the crowd to stop pointing at Michael's failed genitalia...wait...

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ricomma90- March 23, 2010 at 2:16 pm

"See mom, i told you i bought a speedo"

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Vlad- March 23, 2010 at 2:06 pm

Two men pointing in three different directions.

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MetaHuman- March 23, 2010 at 1:07 pm

"SOLD... to Strikeforce for $1! Cris Cyborg, watch out! The truth shall make you free!"

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srkevinbrown- March 23, 2010 at 12:41 pm

Pull my finger.

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Shagen- March 23, 2010 at 11:34 am

Rogan: Brandon look! It's that fucking kid from the locker room I told you about!

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GSP for Prime Minister- March 23, 2010 at 11:33 am

Vera: "I want THE TRUTH!"

Rogan: "Ok..... YOU SUCK!"

Vera: "Did you order the code red??? Did you order the code red?!!"

Rogan: "YOU'RE GODDAMN RIGHT I DIIIIID!!!"

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aaronb- March 23, 2010 at 11:25 am

After just watching Der Untergang in his undies, Brandon shows Jon Jones his best Heil Hitler

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KOParty- March 23, 2010 at 11:03 am

Brandon Vera and Joe Rogan's first and last day at the UFC cheer squad tryouts.

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Barc- March 23, 2010 at 11:01 am

Joe Rogan is the world greatest wingman. You can almost hear him saying, "Yeah, Brandon, you take that one; I'll hit the fat chick."

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mixmasternut- March 23, 2010 at 10:44 am

Joe Rogan auctions off the UFC's most eligible bachelor to the highest bidder.

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YesSir47- March 23, 2010 at 10:37 am

The last photograph taken of Greg Louganis before he fatefully attempted the dive, fell short, and landed orbital first on the sharp edge of Bones' elbow...

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PunchesInBunches- March 23, 2010 at 10:29 am

"Let me tell you something about these tattoos, okay. That is Buddhist, that is Nordic, that is Hindu, that's just gibberish. They are completely conflicting ideologies, and that does not make you a citizen of the world, it makes you full of shit"

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kirk92- March 23, 2010 at 10:08 am

Never again would Dana White let Joe Rogan drive a fighter to the weigh-ins.

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whiterice- March 23, 2010 at 10:00 am

As it turns out, Vera should've spent more time training, and less time working on his Michael Phelps impersonation.

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whiterice- March 23, 2010 at 9:50 am

According to the Vera-Rogan dial, it's about 12:15.

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whiterice- March 23, 2010 at 9:49 am

Next up on the high dive...

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SL8Eddy- March 23, 2010 at 9:42 am

"To The Left To The Left, Everything You Own In A Box To The Left".

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steampunk22- March 23, 2010 at 9:38 am

@rex13 FTW! Nice one man, beat me to the punch!

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J-Dog- March 23, 2010 at 9:37 am

Rogan uses Vera to catch his infamous hog watcher in the act. He then points him out in the crowd to publicly humiliate him for staring at Vera's man meat. Vera felt flattered by the whole incident.

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UFkegger2- March 23, 2010 at 9:24 am

Actually Vera vs Rogan is probably a fair fight

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ArmFarmer- March 23, 2010 at 8:47 am

I'm not reading 6 pages of this bullshit. I'm just going to assume that like the first page there is about 2 funny comments per page, the rest are unfunny to the point that they are painful to read, and 80% of them have something to do with an auction or a clock.

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Contraband- March 23, 2010 at 8:36 am

Rogan: "hey security please remove Jake Rossen from the media section, he don't have credentials to be down here.

Vera: "well Loretta Hunt and TJ De Santis are sitting over there"

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Super-Drunk Punch- March 23, 2010 at 8:34 am

Sometimes "The Truth" hurts, but today "The Truth" got hurt and this was only the weigh-ins......

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punchguyinface- March 23, 2010 at 8:33 am

Vera joins Rogan in a poorly choreographed yet highly ironic rendition of "Stayin' Alive".

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Contraband- March 23, 2010 at 8:32 am

Yo Rogan look it's Ben Fowlkes!
Rogan "who cares Ben Goldstein is over here!"

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Misfit29er- March 23, 2010 at 8:28 am

Rogan: Ladies and Gentlemen...please welcome to the stage...The Truth!!!

Vera: Is my music all queued up?! No, no not that song...it should be "Cherry Pie" by Warrant!

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SomeDude- March 23, 2010 at 8:15 am

Vera reveals his new career as the local beach creeper. Rogan:"And there's the end of The Truth's career ladies and gentlemen, goodnight!"

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imabigfan- March 23, 2010 at 8:02 am

Vera and Rogan take their Second Shooter routine, a vaudevillian take on the Kennedy assassination conspiracies, on the road.

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justscrappin- March 23, 2010 at 7:40 am

Vera: " oh hoho...I heard you up there...very funny..yes I know I'm wearing a speedo..and my opponent's nickname is "bones"...I see where your going with this."
Rogan: "Ok Brandon..the witty banter with the crowd is cute..but you need to get your grape-smuggling, primadonna ass off the stage now."

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Randle McMurphy- March 23, 2010 at 7:33 am

At the UFC washout auction:

Brandon Vera, "I see you playing coy up there Coker."

Joe Rogan,"Going once, going twice, SOLD; to the Blue Collar Brawlin' Promotion."

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JaredMagno- March 23, 2010 at 7:33 am

Brandon flaunts his swimmers build to the crowd while Joe Rogan agrees with the audience that sock stuffing is entirely appropriate for certain occasions.

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Benito Kamelas- March 23, 2010 at 7:22 am

One More Time, You Sure You Want to Be a F*cking Fighter?
You have to wear a speedo

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Arnisador- March 23, 2010 at 7:04 am

Vera: "Shonie, you were right man, this shit really breathes! I really like the way the fabric..."
Rogan: "SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET OVER THERE"

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jordanb- March 23, 2010 at 6:52 am

Shortly after, Jon Jones reminded Brandon Vera why real men do not wear Speedos.

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Jeeves- March 23, 2010 at 6:49 am

"3, 3, 3.... gimme 4, 4, 4, do i hear 4, 4, 4? Going once, going twice, sold! .... to the young Philippino boy stage left for $3."

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Neil113- March 23, 2010 at 6:49 am

On Saturday, Joe Rogan presented a 30 minute arguement to the UFC governing body as to why the "12 to 6" elbow strike should not be illegal. This included a detailed comparison between all of the other clock positions. Here we see Joe discussing the "12 to 3" position with the help of his assistant, Brandon Vera.

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Redtigershark2- March 23, 2010 at 6:47 am

"There he is!"

With Brandon Vera's help, Joe Rogan catches the creepy kid from the locker room scoping out dudes again.

Or

Your partner's camera is enabled
You disconnected. Searching for a new partner...

Proving once again Chatroulette is nothing but cocks.

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srkevinbrown- March 23, 2010 at 6:45 am

Once again proving the Asian stereotype...

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srkevinbrown- March 23, 2010 at 6:44 am

What do these two have in common besides pointing? They are both bald and think their jiu jitsu is alot better than it actually is.

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srkevinbrown- March 23, 2010 at 6:43 am

Like Babe Ruth, Vera calls his shot. Joe frantically searches for a bat to give Vera before Vera decides to improvise... again.

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srkevinbrown- March 23, 2010 at 6:38 am

What guys?!!! Black makes it look slimmer.

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srkevinbrown- March 23, 2010 at 6:37 am

With the assistance of Joe Rogan, Brandon Vera frantically searches for a penis smaller than his.

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Cosmin- March 23, 2010 at 6:32 am

Vera: I see you baby

Rogan: Shakin that ass..
Shakin that ass..

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knuckleup101- March 23, 2010 at 6:22 am

Vera: Look at the little tweety birds............

Rogan: screw that, DID YOU SEE THE SIZE OF THAT CHICKEN!!

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packstein- March 23, 2010 at 6:15 am

always the gentleman, Bas takes his jacket off before punching you in the liver

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Cosmin- March 23, 2010 at 6:10 am

Rogan: "How many broken bones in the face? Your answer Brandon? ..And the survey says...."

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Cosmin- March 23, 2010 at 5:49 am

Humpty Dumpty indicating how many pieces his head is currently in..
and Joe Rogan pointing to the man who will be the cause for all the king's horses and all the king's men not being able to put Humpty together again.

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Cosmin- March 23, 2010 at 5:38 am

Rogan: Get back in there! You're not done! There's ice all over the floor! ..There's 100 pieces of ice still on the floor and these guys just scrambled out because of the pressure.

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siksik6- March 23, 2010 at 5:21 am

Already well known for his ruthless backlash towards hecklers, Joe Rogan finally hears "He must have been in the pool" one too many times.

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spazzway- March 23, 2010 at 4:44 am

Vera: and i'm telling you, i'm not goin,
even though the rough times are showin,
im staying, im staying,
AND U, AND U, AND U, ur gonna love me..

Rogan: Don't forget that guy..

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Eater- March 23, 2010 at 4:38 am

why it's grease lightning!

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scabby.arm- March 23, 2010 at 4:29 am

Which way to the bathroom?

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Durden- March 23, 2010 at 4:11 am

Banana hammock: 45$
Egyptian hieroglyph tattoos: 500$
Newly polished cheeckbones: 15$
To see all of the above get smashed to pieces along with his facial structure?

..Priceless

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sikgimp- March 23, 2010 at 3:26 am

3 o`clock people !Its weight-in time!

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Legit-su- March 23, 2010 at 3:01 am

How many elbows does it take to make an ironic picture?

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Rad Chilies- March 23, 2010 at 2:34 am

Joe and Brandon reenacted the Boondock Saints for several hours before finally remembering that it’s a pretty bad movie.

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naptime- March 23, 2010 at 2:03 am

Rogan: hey bones! you know who got the fattest asses, and the best pussy? Midgets nigga!

Vera: shieeeeeeettttt! my wife is better, joe. what's up baby? yeah....

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ghostboner- March 23, 2010 at 1:49 am

In retrospect, Barrack decided that his first mistake was blazing with Joe Rogan. His second mistake was allowing Joe Rogan talk his stoned ass into letting him and Brandon Vera handle the State of the Union address.

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inverted triangle poke- March 23, 2010 at 1:30 am

At long last Vera let the world know what the move would be that topples "bones Jones." It was Dim-mak the death touch, or just a mean wet willie, but you'll have to watch the fight to know.

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dan423- March 23, 2010 at 1:21 am

The tragic guessing game of where Vera's missing pants are continues.

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jimmylegs- March 23, 2010 at 12:53 am

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson slimming down to play Mr. Lee in the newest, "Harold & Kumar" movie.

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PERPATRAITOR- March 23, 2010 at 12:12 am

Rogan is simply helping Vera make the 'L' shape(for loser), because that's the truth!

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19kai89- March 23, 2010 at 12:05 am

vera: I'm gonna be thiiiiiiis high after the fight!

rogan: quick, my bag of hallucinogenic pcp laced weed is over there! hook a brotha up!

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steampunk22- March 22, 2010 at 11:13 pm

Holy balls, I just got home from work and there is all ready 250+ responses on this one. I think I'll pass.

My vote goes to @Rex13 !!! Gotta support the homeys!

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FreddyFangers- March 22, 2010 at 10:58 pm

Rogan points at Don Frye's clean shaven face....Vera points and smiles at the crowd, not realizing that he is in fact wearing Don Frye's mustache.

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fmez10- March 22, 2010 at 10:47 pm

It only takes one elbow shot to destroy my face!

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bdrinkin247- March 22, 2010 at 10:34 pm

Vera: That Couture guy touched me !
Rogan: No you got molested by that guy (Jones)!

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BFG- March 22, 2010 at 10:08 pm

Rogan: Vera, you're just a wannabe. if you look at that thing.. Jones is a real black man.

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A Body Like Chucks- March 22, 2010 at 10:07 pm

Rogan: ladies and gentlemen, the first olympic gold medalist in the UFC making his UFC debut! APOLO OHNO!!

*Ohno points randomly in the crowd so their attention isn't all to his 'asian' side of his speedos.

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superflat- March 22, 2010 at 10:02 pm

After successfully completing a Buffer 360, Joe Rogan calls out Vera's opponent -- an unpaid mortgage and a wife who knows six ways to submit a man using his testicles.

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Preezt- March 22, 2010 at 9:53 pm

As vera poses, Rogan spots the same creepy kid staring at his penis.

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dedflesh- March 22, 2010 at 9:41 pm

Vera: that guy stole my pants
Rogan: that guy kicked your a$$!

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easy11019- March 22, 2010 at 9:31 pm

Vera: I wore this banana hammock for all my homosexuals in the top row

Rogan: Goldbergs got a boner!!!

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macleod44- March 22, 2010 at 8:55 pm

Joe calls strike two as Vera calls his shot that he plans on hitting with his dong.

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Goat- March 22, 2010 at 8:34 pm

Both men attempted to distract the other with the age-old "Look over there" trick. Unfortunately, their plans backfired and they both ended up distracting themselves.

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Goat- March 22, 2010 at 8:32 pm

Believe it or not, both of these men are pointing at James Toney's delusion, which easily spanned the length of the venue.

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NemesisBC- March 22, 2010 at 8:32 pm

Despite their best efforts, Brandon Vera and Joe Rogan still both couldn't accurately measure the size of Tito Ortiz's skull.

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nick 420 diaz- March 22, 2010 at 7:45 pm

the truth is he cant hit a home run with that wood!!

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Eneb- March 22, 2010 at 7:39 pm

Rogan: "Accepting offers for a special night on the town with BRANDON VERA! Any offers ladies? any at all? really? seriously... anything. Alright, sold to the lady in the front for a nickel you found on the floor."

Vera: "A new personal best! Back to my former self! Sky is the limit, baby!"

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HEX- March 22, 2010 at 7:33 pm

Now, you look out for that left elbow!

The one over there?

No No Noooooo.

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HEX- March 22, 2010 at 7:29 pm

Look Brandon the Truth is over there!

No Rogan its over here, i know what the Truth looks like!

BOOM HEADSHOT

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TokyoREW- March 22, 2010 at 7:26 pm

Look, Dana! I can see my seat for the next UFC from here!

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drunkenmime- March 22, 2010 at 7:24 pm

In the year 2012 Brandon Vera finally found true happiness . Being the first guest on "Joe Rogan's : Hog watchers Live" Brandon knew that all of his childhood dreams had indeed come true.

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peanutbuttter- March 22, 2010 at 7:19 pm

This picture isn't funny.

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Jabsent- March 22, 2010 at 7:15 pm

Despite their efforts, the recreation of Chaim Zins' "The Supernatural" was a complete failure.

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punchguyinface- March 22, 2010 at 7:05 pm

Nice, bro, but you ever try pointing at the sky... on weeeeed?

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pizanne9- March 22, 2010 at 7:04 pm

L is for "Length" as in "The length of your weigh-in shorts should not by any means be under 3 inches."

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dannyvalentine- March 22, 2010 at 6:51 pm

Starting off tonight's auction we have this fine young man with fine bone structure and delicate cheek bones, shall we start the bidding at five dollars?

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Mdollas- March 22, 2010 at 6:50 pm

Vera "Theres been a lot of talk about death in the octogan latley, Up there is where the warriors...Rogan "THERES STILL ICE ON THE FLOOR!!!! Its right there!!"

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shizite- March 22, 2010 at 6:39 pm

In an impressive display of teamwork and a unique use of positioning, Joe and Brandon simultaneously point out the direction the fight ending blow will come from

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landertime- March 22, 2010 at 6:38 pm

brandon, from one to ten, how much pain will your right eye be in after the fight?

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shizite- March 22, 2010 at 6:36 pm

Later the next day, Vera showed us another patented Lloyd Earvin Money Move, the "Cab Fare Out of the Spotlight"

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cecils_pupils- March 22, 2010 at 6:31 pm

reddemon3 Says:
Mon, 03/22/2010 - 17:35

Cecils__Pupil's 2nd comment is biting off Provrorsbarn. =)
Provrorsbarn comment made me LOL.

Honestly wasn't biting. My first comment was 13:40 my second was 13:48 - that whole time I was tryin' to think of something clever. Yes, it took me that long. His comment was 13:43. Also, it's not like the concept of finger and dick size is a huge stretch of the imagination.

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2 Fine Feiner- March 22, 2010 at 6:27 pm

When I say OVER you say RATED!

OVER!

RATED!

OVER!

RATED!

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Amoboxer- March 22, 2010 at 6:24 pm

Brandon Vera: 'Gonna have a shitty day at work today people'
Joe Rogan: 'Shitty day at work dudes are that way Brandon>>>'

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Millertime84- March 22, 2010 at 6:16 pm

And for their next Song, The Village people will Preform "Macho Man".

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 6:15 pm

Following a string of recent losses, Brandon Vera vowed to start over at square one - wardrobe included.

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 6:10 pm

Few fans realize that Brandon Vera is one of the leading art connoisseurs in MMA. Here he attempts to replicate Michaelangelo's Creation of Adam while dressed as his Statue of David.

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Millertime84- March 22, 2010 at 6:10 pm

Vera: Ratemypoo.com Rogan:Shitty Day

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BFG- March 22, 2010 at 6:07 pm

Rogan: say whatever you want son. i'm betting on that guy

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kaboom07- March 22, 2010 at 6:06 pm

Without hesitation, Rogan moves in to complete the two-man, free standting 'L' formation... For loser. Obviously.

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Maine Blazer- March 22, 2010 at 6:05 pm

Speedo: $30
Tribal tats: $800
Facial Reconstruction: $3,000
That smirk being wiped off "The Truth's" face: Priceless

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TheFanciness- March 22, 2010 at 5:56 pm

For s's and g's Joe gets a kick out of MC'ing bachelor auctions sometimes. Plus, Colorado's comedy scene is always asking for too many "getting high" puns. Joe's above that.

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cmeb90210- March 22, 2010 at 5:55 pm

Don't point to the stars. Joe Rogan thinks the other guy is better anyway...

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Sloppyspray- March 22, 2010 at 5:51 pm

And this is the last known picture of Brandon Vera where the right side of his face isn't mangled

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TheFanciness- March 22, 2010 at 5:50 pm

American Apparel to replace Tapout as event sponsor. No word on whether Arianny and Chandella will be coaches on "TUF 13: Do you want to be a ****ing model?!".

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Diesel34- March 22, 2010 at 5:46 pm

vera: Goodnight Colorado, you've been a great crowd. Can someone bring the car around?
rogan: uh, Brandon, the subway is down there. Good luck, and boxers might be a better strategy/wardrobe move.

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kaboom07- March 22, 2010 at 5:40 pm

Nobody quite understood exactly why Brandon Vera wore a cup to the weigh-ins.
As pictured above... Moments before Joe Roagans wallet went missing.

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TheFanciness- March 22, 2010 at 5:37 pm

Joe: "Tell the Truth! Who wants to do a body shot?"
Brandon: "Yo Snookie! Come on down!"

0 0 Reply

Millertime84- March 22, 2010 at 5:36 pm

There was Confusion at the Weigh-ins Today, when a guest said "Theres no Toilet Paper in the Bathroom, Where can i find something to wipe my Ass with?"

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reddemon3- March 22, 2010 at 5:35 pm

Cecils__Pupil's 2nd comment is biting off Provrorsbarn. =)
Provrorsbarn comment made me LOL.

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Millertime84- March 22, 2010 at 5:33 pm

Wonder Twins Activate, Form the Shape of L for Loser.

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dabix- March 22, 2010 at 5:29 pm

Definitely, the poster of "Xmen 5 : What The Fuck ?" is intriguing, featuring Professor X without his heelchair but in a G string facing a wolverine on drugs in a hip hop battle.
Can't wait for the trailer...

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mmafan420- March 22, 2010 at 5:27 pm

Brandon Vera points and smiles to his single fan in attendance. While Joe Rogan searches for the person smoking the joint.

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NastyNudoh- March 22, 2010 at 5:24 pm

"My name's the Truuth
I got a pimped out gucci swimsuuit
I won't have a jooob
But I'll stay shaaarp
Kerry will pay the rennt
Cuz all my money'll be spent
On fixing my faaace
lada dadaaaa dadaaa dadaaaaa"

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MMA42- March 22, 2010 at 5:19 pm

While Vera was pointing to his fans, Rogan was pointing out that Jones was going to plow Vera's wifey

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Murdock- March 22, 2010 at 5:16 pm

What comes after the letter "L"?..... BOW!!!!

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mmafan420- March 22, 2010 at 5:08 pm

Vera: The Truth is #1.
Rogan: The truth is that man over there will slam you at will and punish you with elbows.

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mmarube- March 22, 2010 at 5:04 pm

Interestingly enough, Joe and Brandon thought they saw the easter bunny at the exact same moment

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IH8lamas- March 22, 2010 at 4:58 pm

JR-" Mike, touch my California wraps again and i'll choke your pudgy ass out again or get Vera to sleep with you!"

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tdpwent- March 22, 2010 at 4:55 pm

Vera thanks his new sponsor Calvin Klein

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hotsaucemonster- March 22, 2010 at 4:54 pm

brandon indicates the length of his penis in inches, joe indicates a place for him to put it(not pictured Stephan Bonar)

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tdpwent- March 22, 2010 at 4:45 pm

Passes to a MMA weigh-in $50 online
A chance to see if your favorite fighter is circumcised...Priceless

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Poutine Guillotine- March 22, 2010 at 4:43 pm

Both men try in vain to divert the publics eyes away from Brandon's junk, however their efforts are in vain as everyone in America wants to see the Truth (his penis).

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tdpwent- March 22, 2010 at 4:41 pm

Joe and brandon point out the people in the crowd that Vera might actually beat in an MMA match

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Costarican- March 22, 2010 at 4:40 pm

Vera: Damn right I have a bigger penis than Jones!!
Rogan: Umm Im actually about to touch the tip of Mr Jones penis and im not even close to him...

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tdpwent- March 22, 2010 at 4:40 pm

Vera show's off his Stink-finger
or
Joe and Brandon point out the reporters they would most like to Prison rape
or
The biggest loser celebrity edition champ thanks everyone for helping him lose all that weight.

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doo doo kazoo- March 22, 2010 at 4:37 pm

Rogan: $250 from the lady in purple to put his clothes back on!
Vera: I like the $5 from the gentleman in the tuxedo shirt for me to take it all off!

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parchy mcthirst- March 22, 2010 at 4:30 pm

Vera is the minute hand, while Rogan is the hour hand

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Contraband- March 22, 2010 at 4:30 pm

Rogan "Get That Cock gazer out of here!"

Vera "Hey Is that Scott Coker! Hey Scott I may need your contact info after tomorrow!"

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stevew- March 22, 2010 at 4:27 pm

Rogan - Did Vera just drop his pants...NOW it's a party!
Vera - PBR me!

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bombsauce- March 22, 2010 at 4:25 pm

hey joe did you here japan joined the space race? Yup theres a little nip in the air!

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WeTheCecilPeoples- March 22, 2010 at 4:23 pm

"To obscurity, and beyond!!!!"

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Contraband- March 22, 2010 at 4:22 pm

oh man Brandon cover up the cock gazer is seated right over there by Seth Petruzelli

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montanamonster- March 22, 2010 at 4:20 pm

Gay porn is number one!!!

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John Kimble- March 22, 2010 at 4:15 pm

"Ok, now just try to imagine that everyone else is in their underwear about to get their face broken on national TV, and Joe Rogan is pointing out the guy that's gonna do it."

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ChiefWiggum- March 22, 2010 at 4:15 pm

Vera, in an effort to break into the male modeling industry, used his weigh ins as an audition to the world. He proudly points to is modeling coach Ashton Kutcher.

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The Flying Canadian- March 22, 2010 at 4:15 pm

Vera - "Not now chief, Im in the fucking zone."
Rogan - "Me too, I'm so high I can't take my eyes off Dana's turkey club over there!"

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Contraband- March 22, 2010 at 4:12 pm

E.T phone home

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Bleak- March 22, 2010 at 4:08 pm

Oral- B: protects your teeth better then a mouth guard.

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mmafan420- March 22, 2010 at 4:06 pm

Dana White announces the official UFC crossing guards.

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Harry Peepshow- March 22, 2010 at 4:05 pm

Joe and Vera sing Karaoke at the after ours party. They picked "Staying Alive". Maybe Phish's "Punch You In The Eye" would have been a more suitable song.

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Decipleofmagus- March 22, 2010 at 4:05 pm

Vera: I love you long time for 1 dolla! make you holla!
Rogan: I see we have a taker, Mr. Irvin claim your prize, and Vera, watch his eyes...he's sensitive.

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Stein- March 22, 2010 at 4:05 pm

Vera: Look its a bird no its a plane no its Sup.....
Rogan: (butts in and says) Its Jon Jones.

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mmafan420- March 22, 2010 at 4:04 pm

Vera declares he will bring back his old self. Rogan proceeds to point out the wheelchair section.

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bcpjkell- March 22, 2010 at 4:02 pm

Brandon Vera's sexual fantasies include Joe Rogan, Speedos, and winning a fight over a decent opponent.

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Tact- March 22, 2010 at 4:01 pm

Vin Diesel after staph

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kk89093- March 22, 2010 at 3:56 pm

As a tribute to the legendary Babe Ruth, Brandon believes his career after this fight will be as far from the UFC as possible

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RJeezy- March 22, 2010 at 3:56 pm

Vera and Joe Rogan do their best Bones Jones snitching impersonation.

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for the love of mma- March 22, 2010 at 3:53 pm

Im coming to take your title's too, Michael Phelps! but first i need to go throw my career in jeopordy!!!!!

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btp1102- March 22, 2010 at 3:53 pm

Vera: Don't believe the hype, just believe what you see!

Rogan: Yea yea, that's enough Brandon, trust me, the hype is long over, just go sit over there.

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KillSwitch_E- March 22, 2010 at 3:51 pm

Krillin gives his final finger-in-the-air pose, exposing his vagina shaped armpit, before being knocked out to the sound of Mike Goldberg's "IT IS AAAAALL OVER!!!...WOW"

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CPreader- March 22, 2010 at 3:50 pm

michael phelps eat your heart out

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jizzninja- March 22, 2010 at 3:50 pm

Look! Its a bird, no its a plane, no its jon jones elbow about to cave my face in

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mmafan420- March 22, 2010 at 3:47 pm

Dont worry Vera, I think the crowd already knows you have 1 inch

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Dr. Cagelove- March 22, 2010 at 3:46 pm

Brandon Vera points out the shooting star he put his hopes on. Joe Rogan points out the TRUTH.

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I Work At Initech- March 22, 2010 at 3:44 pm

Vera - "That's right, who here is a professional manscaper?" "Can I get a witness"
Rogan - "Okay, that's it I'm done with this jackass! You, over there get up here and and waste this dude."

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mmafan420- March 22, 2010 at 3:42 pm

Vera : I'm going straight to the top!
Rogan: Take a seat. Why don't you have a seat over there?

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Harry Nips- March 22, 2010 at 3:42 pm

Rogan: Dude, why does the bottom of your rib cage look like James Irvin's cheekbones? Oh shit there's the hogwatcher!

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Versus Vs IndirectTV- March 22, 2010 at 3:42 pm

Joe Rogan tries to redirect attention while Brandon Vera makes celibratory gestures after suckering Rogan into making a "fist pose" in public

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GrandmasNutmeg- March 22, 2010 at 3:40 pm

Vera is pointing out the starting point of his next victory....a 12-6 elbow to the face from Jones.

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BigMoose- March 22, 2010 at 3:36 pm

Bas just hasn't been the same since the operation

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AKArbalest- March 22, 2010 at 3:34 pm

Rogan: And here is Brandon "The Truth" VERAAAA!!! Looking marvelous in his black satin banana hammock, made by Jaco. Let's see what his opponent Johnny "Bones" Jones will be wearing for tomorrow's show!

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kidnutcase- March 22, 2010 at 3:34 pm

Brandon Vera acknowledging the one fan that pointed out that while Vera may not be the favorite to win against Jon Jones, "The Truth" is that he still has the winningest smile in all of MMA

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LetMeStickItInYourRua- March 22, 2010 at 3:34 pm

I coming to see you momma.

Which is better than my Evan Tanner I am on my way baby. Comment. Too soon?

0 0 Reply

osiris431- March 22, 2010 at 3:30 pm

brandon vera pointing towards the direction on how overrated he has become, while joe rogan points towards the direction of his 'legacy'

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Ascerendant- March 22, 2010 at 3:29 pm

Brandon: See that Joe? This is where my career was at in 2006!
Joe: Yeah, but now it's over there. In the corner. And it looks...well...you know, at least you still have a hot wife, Brandon.

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BigMoose- March 22, 2010 at 3:28 pm

Your getting a car! Annnd your getting a car! and you! and you!

0 0 Reply

Bunk- March 22, 2010 at 3:28 pm

This is how many fights I have left before I get cut

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CageCrusade- March 22, 2010 at 3:28 pm

"It only takes ONE elbow to beat me. Call it a day baby, get my check..."

0 0 Reply

BrandonTheTruth- March 22, 2010 at 3:23 pm

Hi mom! Thanks for washing my speedo's... good lookin' out!

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Viva Hate- March 22, 2010 at 3:20 pm

Shaved head, speedo, since fighting isn't quite working at least he can still enter the 500 meter butterfly.

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Edamus- March 22, 2010 at 3:18 pm

Vera: "I'm going to be number one!"

Rogan: "Good luck with that 'cause my money is on this guy over here..."

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skyjo- March 22, 2010 at 3:18 pm

someone grab his rib before it gets away!

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Jimbizzzale- March 22, 2010 at 3:18 pm

Joe Rogen-"Holy Sh*t Look out Vera Hog Watch Boy is coming.
Brandon Vera- "why did I wear a spedo I knew he'd be following Joe around"

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Nick420Diaz- March 22, 2010 at 3:17 pm

Next on Fear Factor the contestants have to play what's in my speedo

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 3:12 pm

Delirium and confusion are only two consequences of severe weight cutting.

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Hassium- March 22, 2010 at 3:11 pm

The scale to weigh your junk is over there. We need to make sure you and Jones are in the same weight class. Not sure why you're in such a rush to get your pants off, the circus already left town and the one-eyed monster joke is getting old.

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ImataleaoU- March 22, 2010 at 3:10 pm

Dana White To Brandon...Brandon, you my good sir, are a complete wash out and we no longer need your services as a fighter.

Brandon: sniff sniff

Dana W.: However to cover for your ridiculously f#cking stupid contract we will need to "auction" you to the highest bidder along with Gabe Gonzaga,Paul Buentello & James Irvin(thinking-"I doubt I will get anything with those poor (sh it face) cheeks but what the hell") . oh yeah and we kindly ask that you wear your black undies to the auction you know why.. Capiche?(that's Italian for comprende?)...

Brandon:(tears rolling down) But he elbowed my face!! and it was hurting!!

Dana W.: Yeah, we don't care... You wanted to be a F#cking fighter?

Brandon: Well I wanted to quit either way because MTV offered me a reality show, I'm not saying what type of show but there will be a lot of GTL involved..

Dana W.: Well fcuk MTV, and Fcuk strikeforce and Scott C, and $kala too!!

this is the fruit of this conversation!!!^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 3:09 pm

Joe: Hey Brandon, you know you can purchase some fine Tokyo Five clothing right over there.

Brandon: I thought I saw some over there.

Joe: It's there too. Tokyo Five clothing is available wherever fine MMA gear is sold.

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Nick420Diaz- March 22, 2010 at 3:08 pm

I think UFC the musical would have been better if they had casted Roy Nelson in the starring role.

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Phil Bologna- March 22, 2010 at 3:07 pm

"Point if you're no longer relevant."

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Phil Bologna- March 22, 2010 at 3:05 pm

Vera- "Joe I was able to see that huge-ass vein forehead from way over there."

Joe- "Get on the scale shit for brains."

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drew191- March 22, 2010 at 3:05 pm

Knowing that he has no chance of winning the fight with actual skill, Brandon practices his eye poke skills.

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Ring_Rust619- March 22, 2010 at 3:05 pm

"Hey honey, this is how many fights I have left till we have to rely on you winning fights to pay the mortgage"

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drew191- March 22, 2010 at 3:04 pm

Knowing that he has no chance of winning the fight with skill, Brandon practices his eye poke skills.

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drew191- March 22, 2010 at 3:03 pm

Seeing Brandon in a Man-kini makes me want to get hit so hard in the face with an elbow that I can no longer see...

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sarah- March 22, 2010 at 3:02 pm

Just one day before his defeat by Jon Jones, Vera was humiliated by Joe Rogan during a game of "I Spy."

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Phil Bologna- March 22, 2010 at 3:02 pm

"Strikeforce is that way!!!"

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NateGetsIrate- March 22, 2010 at 3:01 pm

There's Waldo!

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Phil Bologna- March 22, 2010 at 3:01 pm

Vera- "Is the scale this way?"
Joe- "Nope over there, near arianny's poon."
Vera- (BIG SMILE)

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MMAExpertNewb- March 22, 2010 at 3:00 pm

Vera and Rogan team up to show us the next letter we'll see on Vera's record.

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Earthbreather002- March 22, 2010 at 2:59 pm

The faux-pas of ripping off Michael Phelps AND Babe Ruth in one pose was totally deserving of a coconut crunch elbow of doom.

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kirk92- March 22, 2010 at 2:58 pm

As he stepped onto the scale, amidst the forced smile and the evaporating self confidence, Brandon Vera was elated to see visions of brutal strikes and broken orbital bones in his future. If only he knew "The Truth" in these omens...

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mizike- March 22, 2010 at 2:57 pm

Y.M.C.A!.. its fun to stay at the Y...

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:57 pm

If there's one thing Harley Davidson supports, it's shirtless young men with shaved chests.

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Phil Bologna- March 22, 2010 at 2:56 pm

Vera- "Look joe, no pants."
Joe- "Yeah but, wheres my fucking weed dummy!"

0 0 Reply

DDRDude- March 22, 2010 at 2:56 pm

Brandon Vera & Joe Rogan can't agree on The Truth's career trajectory.

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Phil Bologna- March 22, 2010 at 2:55 pm

My orbital bone is going to get launched way over there later!!!

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Soda Popinski- March 22, 2010 at 2:54 pm

"YOU CANT HANDLE 'THE TRUTH!'"
"yeah...you.....top row"

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:54 pm

Brandon Vera and Joe Rogan point to their modesty and objectivity, both of which remained a good distance away.

0 0 Reply

simonfisio- March 22, 2010 at 2:52 pm

Brandon Vera showing off his new Power Balance bracelet...
Brandon... It doesn't work!!!! I can't believe you were depending on it to win.

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:49 pm

You know what they say about pointing, "For every finger you point, three more point back at the naked Filipino dude."

0 0 Reply

MIKE MOSHER- March 22, 2010 at 2:47 pm

Classic one upper: Jones see this, then goes for the double arm twirl. And donkey punches a security peon, ya know, to really drive the point home.

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:46 pm

You're really not dancing to a Village People song unless your shirt comes off in the process. Y-M-C-A!!!

0 0 Reply

MaxTheLimit- March 22, 2010 at 2:45 pm

Both Vera and Rogan agree on 'The Truth's' strike total for the upcoming fight. Sadly both guesses were higher than the end result.

0 0 Reply

iloveto69- March 22, 2010 at 2:45 pm

"Ha, look at that dumbass on the big screen. Tight speedos and no dick."

0 0 Reply

youngblood- March 22, 2010 at 2:45 pm

speedo, the official undergarment of potato smugglers world wide.

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:44 pm

Team Rogan-Vera took a disappointing 5th at this year's synchronized pointing contest. Things got off to a terrible start when the suitcase containing the duo's costume was lost at Denver International Airport.

0 0 Reply

VisitingDeadAncestors- March 22, 2010 at 2:42 pm

In an increasingly awkward game of "Simon Says", Joe Rogan catches Dana pointing North instead of South.

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imabigfan- March 22, 2010 at 2:42 pm

Varying pre-fight predictions:

Vera-Top of the world, ma.

Rogan-Down and to the left.

0 0 Reply

MIKE MOSHER- March 22, 2010 at 2:40 pm

They screwed up the reenactment of the Sistine Chapel.

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APFighter13- March 22, 2010 at 2:39 pm

No, No Brandon the pool is that way! How hard did he hit you again?

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:37 pm

It's been over 20 years but this photo still reminds me of Greg Louganis. Say what you will about the man, but he left an indelible mark on the sporting world.

0 0 Reply

Bob Reilly- March 22, 2010 at 2:34 pm

Vera is following Warmachine's footsteps. He was actually promoting his new movie "In Dianna Jones and the Temple of Poon".

0 0 Reply

spennyG- March 22, 2010 at 2:34 pm

dwayne "the rock" johnson starring in a new movie based on a true story of olympic gold medalist, micheal phelps.

0 0 Reply

Startonic- March 22, 2010 at 2:32 pm

Quick, pretend you're blocking an elbow shot. Go!

0 0 Reply

Kellenavalanche- March 22, 2010 at 2:32 pm

A young cartoon boy in the crowd asks vera how many licks it takes to get to the soft gooey center of a skull.

Then a cartoon owl with a lollipop asks Rogan from who? who? (get it? it's a fucking owl.)

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:31 pm

Well Brandon, I've never done bong rips with a Filipino in a banana hammock, but you know what they say, "What happens in Broomfield, stays in Broomfield." Which way to Guida's RV?

0 0 Reply

cinemaassassindotcom- March 22, 2010 at 2:31 pm

Rogan: Representing Greg Louganis MMA Brandon Vera Everyone!!!

0 0 Reply

bdrinkin247- March 22, 2010 at 2:31 pm

As Vera calls out top 5 competition, Rogan quickly asks for security to take this crazy person off the stage.

0 0 Reply

OneMorePunchFujita- March 22, 2010 at 2:31 pm

Harley Davidson can't be happy about this.

0 0 Reply

Desimus- March 22, 2010 at 2:30 pm

Here you can see Rogan and Vera playing a game of "Guess where bits of my face will end up!"

0 0 Reply

Nut Puncher 9000- March 22, 2010 at 2:30 pm

Or how about:

"...And this douchebag is the reason I did horrible in my pools this week"

0 0 Reply

Bob Reilly- March 22, 2010 at 2:29 pm

When did Nicole Ritchie's hair fall out?

0 0 Reply

bitteralex- March 22, 2010 at 2:28 pm

What time is it? It's 3 o'clock and 25 seconds.

0 0 Reply

GroundFighterMMA- March 22, 2010 at 2:27 pm

Vera "Haters to the right"
Rogan "Ladies to the Left"

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:27 pm

The UFC's inaugural bachelor auction took a turn for the bizarre when Brandon Vera stripped down to his skivvies in an attempt to one-up Roy Nelson's exposed breasts.

0 0 Reply

Lysol- March 22, 2010 at 2:27 pm

This picture was taken seconds after Dana White told everyone to point to a real fuckin' fighter.

0 0 Reply

bitteralex- March 22, 2010 at 2:27 pm

Joe Rogan, "His is bigger."

0 0 Reply

Nut Puncher 9000- March 22, 2010 at 2:26 pm

Unfortunately Vera's "After" photo will not get as much sympathy as Pulver's, but the "Before" looks pretty good.

0 0 Reply

AFOMMADOTCOM- March 22, 2010 at 2:26 pm

Brandon Vera sallutes the crowd after listening to Joe Rogan explain that Vera is a Grower not a Show'r ladies and gentlemen

0 0 Reply

As Good As Anyone- March 22, 2010 at 2:25 pm

I'm not sure what's worse: Brandon Vera VS Joe Rogan, Bud Light VS Harley Davidson or Speedo VS Tapout

0 0 Reply

Lysol- March 22, 2010 at 2:24 pm

Yes, his Babe Ruth impression is corny, but at least it's not as creepy as his Edvard Munch Scream impression.

0 0 Reply

legallatino- March 22, 2010 at 2:24 pm

Joe Rogan found Brandon Vera's choice to signal for the triple lendy a bit curious after he revealed he didn't care how his fight against Jon Jones turned out this weekend-- as first thing Monday morning he would announce he'd concentrate on his real love: synchronized diving.

0 0 Reply

Komodo- March 22, 2010 at 2:24 pm

The Truth is... I just farted.

0 0 Reply

LukeTheDuke- March 22, 2010 at 2:23 pm

"FUCKIN YAYGA-BOMBS."

0 0 Reply

Get Off Me- March 22, 2010 at 2:23 pm

Vera: "One pound under! Who's feelin' the banana hammick?"
Rogan:"He is Brandon, that's the kid who keeps staring at my hog in the locker room, over there, he's got that look on his face again"

0 0 Reply

babysharks- March 22, 2010 at 2:23 pm

Vera's body is about all he has got going for him after Jones destroyed his face and credibility.

0 0 Reply

Smitty- March 22, 2010 at 2:23 pm

Brandon unknowingly gives his last regular smile, before having his face reconstructed by an elbow.

0 0 Reply

schnetzler- March 22, 2010 at 2:23 pm

"Hey, there's my boy James Irvin! James, save me some ice...and ask Guida if we can get a ride in his RV!"

0 0 Reply

OiScout- March 22, 2010 at 2:19 pm

Weigh-ins is like Chatroulette. You will always see a guy without a shirt and a dick.

0 0 Reply

caffn8d- March 22, 2010 at 2:19 pm

The UFC talking wall clock says, "three o'clock, bitches."

0 0 Reply

Smitty- March 22, 2010 at 2:18 pm

Hey!! When did that dude get out of that wheelchair, and quit as the boss of the Xmen?

0 0 Reply

JacobsenJ02- March 22, 2010 at 2:17 pm

Journalist: “You seem to have a great attitude going into this fight, do you anticipate getting your face broken and if so, from what direction will the Bones Jones elbow be coming from?”

Vera: “Uhm, yes on the broken face question but it'll come via illegal elbow from somewhere up there, hence my joy”

Rogan: “No, it'll come from over there, Bones Jones doesn't make the same mistake twice.”

0 0 Reply

Kevin Marshall- March 22, 2010 at 2:17 pm

Rogan: "Is there anyone in the crowd Brandon Vera can beat in a fight? Anyone at all?"
Vera: "Is that...yep, Stephan Bonnar, right up there!"

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:16 pm

Babe Ruth celebrated his called shot by eating a finely marbled steak in the company of a couple of busty broads. Brandon Vera celebrated his called shot by drinking steak mush through a straw surrounded by Colorado's finest facial surgeons.

0 0 Reply

southpawrighty- March 22, 2010 at 2:16 pm

Someone call customs! Another fighter is trying to smuggle a small banana & grapes into the UFC.

0 0 Reply

BigHeathenMike- March 22, 2010 at 2:16 pm

Vera raises his finger, on which he plans to wear the ring of Mighty Hercules, vanquishing his foe with power, skill, and authority. He is confident, even aloof. His Black Trunks of Despair foreshadow, in his mind, the darkness of his opponent's soul after defeat.

Rogan, ignoring fables and myth, points out the fella who'll break Vera's face apart in seventeen hours. Reality, FTW!

0 0 Reply

Smitty- March 22, 2010 at 2:16 pm

Brandon: "Look at all these mens up there"
Joe: "The gay section is over there"

0 0 Reply

hows taste my pee pee- March 22, 2010 at 2:16 pm

A great example of point-counterpoint.

0 0 Reply

ASSASSIN07- March 22, 2010 at 2:15 pm

Joe is calling over the guy who stares at his penis to gaze at Brandons

0 0 Reply

relaxer- March 22, 2010 at 2:14 pm

Vera: "All my nuthuggers went that way and they took my pants with them"

0 0 Reply

ASSASSIN07- March 22, 2010 at 2:14 pm

El Guapo Says there are 5 Principles
1. Brainstorm
2. Sanitize
3. Prepare
4. Execute
5. Everything in the kitchen is a weapon

0 0 Reply

bobzemuda- March 22, 2010 at 2:12 pm

I like it so fresh I want to take it behind a middle school and get it pregnant.

0 0 Reply

southpawrighty- March 22, 2010 at 2:10 pm

Hey Joe, Simon said, "put the bong down and raise your other right hand"

0 0 Reply

MMAGirl- March 22, 2010 at 2:10 pm

Opening scene from Brandon's new movie 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid'.

0 0 Reply

Smitty- March 22, 2010 at 2:09 pm

Brandon Vera came straight from the swimming portion of the Colorado triathalon, just in time to make the weigh in.

0 0 Reply

therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:09 pm

Hey Brandon, where'd you get the sweet leg tattoo and banana hammock? Over there?

No, over there.

0 0 Reply

southpawrighty- March 22, 2010 at 2:08 pm

Vera basks in the glory of finally achieving #1 status ... on John Jones's highlight reel. Go Vra!!!

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Ouch That hurts- March 22, 2010 at 2:08 pm

World's worst shadow puppet routine, ever!

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southpawrighty- March 22, 2010 at 2:08 pm

Vera baskes in the glory of finally achieving #1 status ... on John Jones's highlight reel. Go Vra!!!

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southpawrighty- March 22, 2010 at 2:08 pm

Vera baskes in the glory of finally achieving #1 status ... on John Jones's highlight reel. Go Vera!!!

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puckdrummer- March 22, 2010 at 2:07 pm

The WORST BJ Penn impression I have ever seen!!!!

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Smitty- March 22, 2010 at 2:07 pm

Joe Rogan introduces Bas Ruttens and Ariannys son.

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therussianglamourpuss- March 22, 2010 at 2:07 pm

Brandon Vera would rather go naked than wear Tapout.

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Smitty- March 22, 2010 at 2:05 pm

Yes, to the gentleman in the back.....I wear the speedo to show why I talk like a black man.

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Howard Jennum- March 22, 2010 at 2:04 pm

hey look its my former self quick somebody help me get him back

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El Famous Burrito- March 22, 2010 at 2:02 pm

Joe Rogan and Brandon Vera demonstrate the difference between a weather vane and a wind sock.

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cecils_pupils- March 22, 2010 at 2:00 pm

It's nice to know that Brandon has found a new career as an on-stage prop for Joe Rogan's Comedy Tour "Pull My Finger".

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TH3SH3PH3RD- March 22, 2010 at 2:00 pm

"thats where i'm gonna be sitting next ufc event."

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Richard Fitzentite- March 22, 2010 at 2:00 pm

Joe Rogan feverishly tries to get a production assistants attention, so they can retrieve a sharpie from his "European Shoulder Bag." Joe has sent countless fan letters and left a ticket at will call for the last 5 years...he simply can not believe that Billy Zane actually showed up.

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BryanF- March 22, 2010 at 1:59 pm

I wish I would get that excited whenever I was in my underwear.

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El Guapo- March 22, 2010 at 1:58 pm

Gimmee a gadang t-shirt, gadang it!

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imakeutap- March 22, 2010 at 1:57 pm

Rogan: "Sold!!! You sir are the winner of our Night on the Town with Vera for $100!!

Vera: "I'm gonna rock your world"

(Rob Schneider off stage): "You can do it all night looooong!"

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judosmac- March 22, 2010 at 1:57 pm

That's 250, do I hear 300...300 thanks Master Lloyd.

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dogpt3- March 22, 2010 at 1:57 pm

Okay, do I have 1 dolla 1 dolla 1 dollaarrrr?
going once, going twice.....
ONE Dollar! I have One dollar. SOLD! to the lady in the back.

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BryanF- March 22, 2010 at 1:57 pm

Rogan: Hah! Caught him looking! 2 for flinching! Its only gay if you make eye contact!

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Lateral Drop- March 22, 2010 at 1:56 pm

"Can somebody please get the Asian guy from Hot Rod off the stage?"

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danomite- March 22, 2010 at 1:53 pm

Joe Rogan: "Put your pants on Brandon, here comes Fatty Hogwatcher!"

or

as hard as Rogan and Vera tried, they weren't gonna get 10,000 people to fall for the "hey, what's that over there?" technique at the same time.

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Slag- March 22, 2010 at 1:50 pm

Brandon was all smiles until Rogan noticed the "Hog Watcher" off to the side staring intensely at Vera's tightly wrapped package.

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SweetAfflictionShirt- March 22, 2010 at 1:49 pm

"Jaegerbombs, Jaegerbombs, Jaegerbombs..."

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Levi Jones- March 22, 2010 at 1:49 pm

Rogan: A night with Brandon Vera... going once...
Vera: I think we have a bidder in the back.
Bones: Nah. Not a bid. I'll just rape you for free later.

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El Famous Burrito- March 22, 2010 at 1:49 pm

BENDY STRAWS! WHO WANTS BENDY STRAWS?

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BryanF- March 22, 2010 at 1:48 pm

"To the window!!! To the wall!" Never before has the words of Lil Jon so aptly described an individual's career trajectory.

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cecils_pupils- March 22, 2010 at 1:48 pm

Rogan: "Brandon, please give the ladies an idea of the size of your penis using only hand gestures..."

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One Two- March 22, 2010 at 1:48 pm

Brandon vera throwing a fight everybody!!! i got $550 from the older gentleman up front.

edit nevermind he broke his face...

Fuck you Carlos Mencia!!!!!

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Canseco_MMA- March 22, 2010 at 1:47 pm

Joe Rogan:"Damnit Brandon, I said 'The Truth', not Babe Ruth....now go sit in the corner"

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bobzemuda- March 22, 2010 at 1:47 pm

Anticipating an epic 4:20, Joe checks the time with his pal Eddie on the eve of Michael Phelps UFC debut.

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lenwillkillu- March 22, 2010 at 1:46 pm

In a stunning turn of events, Brandon Vera Babe Ruth's Jon Jones' next shot, pointing out how far his brains will travel post elbows.

"Way over there son!"

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SweetAfflictionShirt- March 22, 2010 at 1:46 pm

"Brandon you just lost another fight in the UFC and broke your face, what are your plans now?"

"I'm going to the Jersey Shore Joe!"

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Duke- March 22, 2010 at 1:45 pm

After "The Truth" turned out not be the best nickname for him at this point in his career Vera needed a change. Finally the world was ready for "The Plum Smuggler".

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ByrneDout- March 22, 2010 at 1:45 pm

I'm going to delay the launch of Jone Jones...for One round....Okay maybe 3 minutes. Truth.

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Viper29- March 22, 2010 at 1:45 pm

Rogan: "Look, thats where your going to get your face bashed in tomorrow night!"

Vera: "Yah and there's where I'll watch the next weigh-ins..."

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KuJudo- March 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm

Brandon Vera, lost in the moment, trying to figure out if he can leg kick Rogan with his dick.

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provrorsbarn- March 22, 2010 at 1:43 pm

"Look!! my finger is bigger then my dick"

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El Famous Burrito- March 22, 2010 at 1:41 pm

The UFC attempts to break Mickey Mouse's strangehold on the novelty wrist watch market.

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Peterh- March 22, 2010 at 1:40 pm

Look, up there in the last row, that's where I dropped my career.

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Durden- March 22, 2010 at 1:40 pm

Vera: E.T. phone home, bitches!
Rogan: I knew it! Jones come here! Fuck his orbital bone up that's the only way to kill these fuckin' spacemen!
Rogan: Of course I'm sure, me and Eddie have developed all kinds of techniques incase earth is invaded by these fuckers!

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cecils_pupils- March 22, 2010 at 1:40 pm

And here we see Joe Rogan and Brandon Vera at UFC's quarterly fight roster clean-up auction.

Rogan: "YES!... we finally have a bid of one dollar from the gentleman representing Strikeforce in the front row. One dollar... Going once. Going Twice. SOLD to Strikeforce for one dollar".

And that's The Truth ladies and gentlemen.

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qwerty- March 22, 2010 at 1:40 pm

Vera calls his shot, then gets knocked out of the park.

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Pickled Yams- March 22, 2010 at 1:39 pm

We want to go to the Y! M! C! A!

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Cheeseandelbows- March 22, 2010 at 1:39 pm

Vera - "It goes from the tip of Rogan's finger to righttt...abouuuuttt...hhhere. Since i can't fight well anymore, Joe will tell you about it to save my ego..."

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JoseMonkey- March 22, 2010 at 1:38 pm

Joan Rogan and Brendan Vera take a moment to teach the fans how to tell time. "When the big hand points to the 3 and the little hand points to the 12, it's 12:15!"

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LET IT RAIN- March 22, 2010 at 1:37 pm

Joe: "Ok, now let's bring out the REAL Techno Viking for a dance off!"

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timmytietoe- March 22, 2010 at 1:36 pm

I WAS IN THE POOL!

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Sort3r- March 22, 2010 at 1:35 pm

And SOLD! To the fine young gentleman in the third row. Yes, you sir, with the shark tooth necklace and ed hardy t-shirt.

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h311i0n- March 22, 2010 at 1:35 pm

Vera: "Look the midget ran over there!"
Rogan: "Dude his brother is humping bruce buffers leg!"

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jonwry- March 22, 2010 at 1:35 pm

rogan says "phelps my weed is over there"

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Imentiu- March 22, 2010 at 1:32 pm

Michael Phelps makes his MMA debut

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Carl Sagan- March 22, 2010 at 1:32 pm

One illegal blow for all my fans!

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Geriatric Peon- March 22, 2010 at 1:31 pm

Ebay's first live auction for filipino mail order brides

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stingrza- March 22, 2010 at 1:31 pm

Quick! Everyone point to Brandon's career trajectory!

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jesusholmes- March 22, 2010 at 1:30 pm

Brandon thinks he's pointing at his near future, Joe Rogan corrects him by pointing out Jon Jones elbows

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ReX13- March 22, 2010 at 1:28 pm

As Vera acknowledges his wife starting the bidding at $500, Joe Rogan works the crowd in an effort to recoup some of the UFC's investment in "The Truth".

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Berger- March 22, 2010 at 1:27 pm

…in his freetime, our bachelor enjoys Meg Ryan movies, taking in Asian cooking classes, and competing in mixed martial arts karate matches. We’ll start the bidding for an evening with Brandon at $45. Ladies, do I have any takers?

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Crap Factory- March 22, 2010 at 1:25 pm

Vera: "I'm going to the top!!"

Rogan: "Ok little man, go sit over there now."

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Nut Puncher 9000- March 22, 2010 at 1:23 pm

Using this photo as evidence, it is clear that only losers wear speedo.

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