Who is the biggest dick in mma?

Brock
Tim
Brock's tattoo

Brock: "Any advice on how to beat Frank Mir... oh never mind."

Brock: "I could never quit you big fella!"

Tim: "You had me at hello!"

not in NY

Brock's manager: "...and here we have some random black guy,losing to him would ruin your career.Here is Amy,she's in charge of refreshments,losing to her would ruin your career,and this is Tim Sylvia,the ex-UFC heavyweight champion,losing to him would ruin yo...you know what?it'd probably be easier for me to just list the people you should fight,that way i can get back to doing my job and give Dana a rest."

Black guy in background: "Fucking white rednecks"

In NY

Silva: "I've been using those roids you gave me"
Lesnar: "How are they working out"
Silva: "I'm bigger now, but have some side-effects"
Lesnar" "Oh really? Like what"
Silva: "Masagatti hatred"
Lesnar: "Word...keep doing them..they work and give you a shot at the title with just 2 wins"

^^ Not in NY

Brock! I am your father.

washed up football player meets washed up boxer

Hello their Mr. Lesnar, welcome to the "how to lose a fight in under a minute" seminar. Why don't you take a seat over there, we will begin shortly.

In NY

"Hey Les, great to hear from yah, so you wanna go to Sizzlah and grab some grub?"
"Maybe some other time"
"Brock, I thought you said we were gonna be friends?"
"Oh, were friends, i just gotta go..."

(not in NY or Vegas, would love a free tshirt though, HOF or whatever you got lying around would be bueno)

Today, I saw a picture of Brock Lesnar and Tim Sylvia shaking hands. FML.


Not in NY.

@831

Quit being a dickhole and either read the comments and laugh, read them and don't laugh, don't read them, get cancer, you know, whatever you want to do, but quit fucking harping about something that doesn't really fucking matter to anyone.........ever.

Tim: "So the chairs were fixed and didn't hurt and it was all fake?!"
Brock : "Yeah man, let me call Vince. Maybe we might be able to find you work!"

Sylvia: Hey, you're Brock Lesnar: UFC Heaveyweight interim champ, former-WWE superstar, and the next big thing! You've rocketed up the MMA ladder to become the one of it's biggest superstars!

Lesnar: Thanks! And you're... uh... *awkward pause*... didn't I see you on Blind Date once?

Tim Sylvia and Brock Lesnar practice their Beat It encore days before the Michael Jackson memorial.

Not in New York.

So many fucking morons that dont state whether they are in NY or not. Unbelievable the stupidity that exists within these readers.

The Diggler is in NYC BTW.

Tim Sylvia: "Hey Brock, you ever heard of this Jiu-Jitsu stuff?
Brock Lesnar: "Nope"

Syvia: due to my recent lack of success in MMA, I think I'm gonna take a stab at Pro Wrestling....... Any advise?

Sylvia: "Sword Fight!"
Lesnar: "Sword FIGHT!... wait.."

lol @slopspray

Not pictured: Fedor Emelianenko, human dignity

Brock: So we're seeing The Ugly Truth right?
Tim: Absolutely, nobody has to know..."the ugly truth" LOL just give me your number.
Brock: Get ready to laugh those mutton chops right off bubba.

".....seriously, stop trying to touch my chest"

"but, Heath said it actually felt like a rea-"

"dude, stop"

"fine,.....will you at least rub up against my back?"

"Okay, make it quick"

"promise? shake on it?"

Brock- "you wanted to talk to me tim?"

Tim- "Hey what is Sable's number again?, I want to know how taste your Big Pee Pee!"

Looking back, this special episode of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy had trouble written all over it.

(I live in Brooklyn - see previous entries)

Tim didn't have the heart to tell Brock that "Hammerfist" really wasn't an unbeatable option in Rock, Paper, Scissors.

*in a Bruce Buffer voice, read slowly*

As Brock Lesnar locked eyes with Tim Sylvia, he couldn't help but wonder if he was looking into his own future... His own very, very tasty future.

Meanwhile, Tim Sylvia already began dialing 911. He knew Brock Lesnar's past. Like the mighty female praying mantis, Brock Lesnar kills everyone he has sex with. And Brock Lesnar has sex with anyone who's hand he shakes.

Let the dance begin!

(No NY here.)

Brock eyes up his next hunt right before he realizes that he doesn't like to eat pussy.

damn! all the x arm references have been used....

"And suddenly the 'lame tattoo and hair club for men' was born"

Brock Lesnar considers adding Manbearpig to his hunting lodge wall.

(no NY)

@yessir47

Give this man the tickets, ROFL, best movie ever!

Excellent Predator reference BTW.

Brothers don't shake hands. Brothers gotta hug!

(not in NY)

Do I smell Bacon?

Hey little dude I am a famous MMA star I have come backstage to meet the rock...have you seen him?

"Oh, I know you.....You are that 'Rock' guy from the dancing monkeys show over at WWE!"

Who's built like a black man now!

Neither one can get a sponsor, but for two very different reasons.

OR

I'm comin for your belt.

in NJ

(this isn't my submission for the contest thing above, just simple speculation.)

Since Brock received the belt not because of his talent but because he struck an old man with a head as durable as blown glass in head a time or three- this photo is probably a glimpse of a future fight.

Everyone knows Tim Sylvia and he used to be good.
Brock Lesnar draws in tickets and has no real talent.

THEREFORE, Dana White could give Tim Sylvia the chance of a lifetime. He'll offer to let him back into the UFC for a one fight deal. If he wins his fight, he gets to stay and gets some pay. If he loses- he's out of the UFC for good and the only person he'll be able to fight after this is Hong Man Chou (sp?)

When Tim agrees- they'll put him against Brock Lesnar. Then when Brock wins this fight with the same "talent" and "prowess" that he beat Heath Herring and Randy Couture- he'll be in line for another title fight. The only other heavyweight talent they could put Brock against if he loses is Cheik Kongo, since we now all know Kongo cannot wrestle and has no wrestling defense.

If Mir wins- I think "The Maniac" would be Brock's only choice. Tim has no real ground game either, beside trying to keep his shoulders as far from the ground as possible and Brock has no real fighting skill, except for being on top in the missionary position against his competition.

/my two cents.

Tim Sylvia: hey Brock, is there any way you can give me Dana Whites phone number? I deleted his damn phone number from my contact list after i left the UFC because I didnt think I would need it anymore. I'm going to try and work out a deal with Dana and see if I can come back to the UFC.

Brock Lesnar: Sure, it's 614 607 1387. But please dont tell him you got it from me. Dana will get pissed if he finds out that I gave you his phone number.

i live in New York

*likely what ended up on Tim's Twitter Account after this photo was taken* (note the phone in his left hand)

omg, met Broke Lesnar tonite. He is BIG 4 reel. Not tall but hes buff. Gonna get his autograph l8r! Wut a strong handshake.

(I'm not in NY, but this picture is too funny.)

Tim: Brock whats up!?! How come you don't return my calls anymore?

Lesner: Guards.....Guards!!!...F*%k!! Hong Man Choi take care of him.

I hope Timmy read the small print on this legally binding verbal agreement

BROCK LESNAR- FINANCIAL ADVICE FOR YOUR FUTURE: COST 250K





failure to pay this amount in 45 days will result in death by lunchboxes.







NY

i think we know which one got the shallow end of the gene pool.

(I can make the event. NYC native)

With his new BJJ wrist-lock skills, Brock shows he can also break Tim Silvia's Arm.

Brock Lesnar and Tim "Fatass" Sylvia at the first annual "Frank Mir Almost Ripped Off One of My Limbs" meeting.

So... this is the arm that Mir snapped?

Yea... and could you do me a favor.. kick him right in the dick..for me.. just one time.

Oh yeah, I am in PA, along the New York/New Jersey border. I can easily make this.

if redmoose and ny ufc fan dont win. im leavin foever and never comming back.... most orginal and just plain better than anyone else

Yah he broke my arm...i got a shoulder to cry on if u need me brother...

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You
"DELIVERANCE 2: Attack of the Swine Flu"

Starring - Brock Lesnar and Tim "Wymphomaniac" Silvia
More pig squealing than the original!

Lesner: "So we have an agreement, if HAL comments on this photo, we will find him and beat his ass."

Sylvia: "Fuck yeah, let me twitter dat."

If Silva could actually get his ass back in fighting shape, this could be a good fight, lesner is probably the stronger of the two, but he wouldnt be able to just lay on top of silva like he did to anyone else

Sylvia: you have a twitter account?
Lesnar: What is that, a bird?

Sloth Boy: Your eyes are like blue skys with the green grass blowing on the plains
Brock: I just want to suck your tailbone
Sloth Boy: Brockkk! stoooop it! hehe

Now do-si-do your partner spin her round and round...

Lesnar "I may have a dick on my chest, but at least I kept away from the tribal."

Timmy "Right on brother, right on."

Would you like some wine Master Lesnar?

Sylvia: you have a number I can reach you?
Lesnar: Who are you?

Brock: "So you really used to be the LHW champ?"

Tim: "Any idea where a brother can get a doughnut up in here?"

Brock: "So, I heard you had sex with the Heavyweight title around your waist.."

Tim: "Yeah.. And?"

Brock: "There's no fucking way you got laid.."

Black guy in the back : "You smell that?..."

White kid : "I think i just saw tim shit his pants...."

Lesnar : "Did you shit your pants? Don't lie to me!"

Sylvia : "I didn't shit my pants, im holding this phone how could i
have shat my pants, i'm a grown man, grown men don't shit their pants wtf you talking about? You smell, its you, it's him, the white kid did it!"

White Kid : "ummm.... whatever you say tim...i guess it was me... just don't take me down give me your back and roll around for 15 minutes you might hurt me douche"

Sylvia : "What did you say?! I'm tough as shit!"

Lesnar : "Why are you dialing 911 ass clown?"


in NYC

im in NYC!!!!!!

Tim: "Damn, that's not what I expected on this Blind Date!! Oh well, I can't be a virgin forever. A hole is a hole"
Brock: "Hello there... , nice titts. You are kinda tall for a womaaaaaaaaaaaa..aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...."

"Run Brock, Bruno ist coming!!!"

"Welcome to the first official meeting of RBM brotherhood [Raped By Mir]"

"So you are a former champ, eh? I know how that feels, damn you Eddie Guerrero!!!"

"Are you sure you are not a homo? Because Roy told me you were his bitch."

In an historic moment, the founding of the Hot Dog Neck Awareness Foundation of America became a reality.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
From Canada

Oh, in Seattle. Sorry.

After a cordial greeting, Sylvia's Brockbot 5000® awaits further programming.

Brock: Thanks Tim for your tips on defending the kneebar
Tim: No prob
Brock:.......ever heard of an F-5?

*Live in CA.....so I won't be there.....*tear

Brock: Is that black guy still looking at us?

Tim: Yeah. Lets do a cool handshake and show him that were down.

Lesnar: Hey I'm Brock and I'm the new dog in the yard. I beat the crap out of Randy Couture and took his belt hehe so I bet you're pretty glad you left when you did before I ate your ass... hey you listening to me?!
Silva: Ahh my good sir terribly sorry I just uploaded The Birth of Tragedy onto my iphone and was giving it a browse. Nietzsche is a genius. Anyways what were you saying?
Lesnar: I was uhh... I beat uhh... F%$K!

Tim: "so it's slap, snap, spin, chest bump then high five, try it".

Brock:" oh... I don't know man."

Tim:" just try it man, it'll be fun, it can be our thing.

Brock:"oook, dude, just once,make it quick"

Tim:" C'mon dude, yer not even trying! You forgot like half the stuff, ok try it again."

BK.

Tim: "Hey let's reenact that manly handshake scene from Predator!"
Brock: "I'll be Carl Weathers. I'm basically black, anyway."

From Tx.

Finally both women and the UFC agree...size doesn't matter.

not in the ny

Alright so it's a deal...Saturday night, meet at my house, wear black and bring your own toilet paper. We will get to Mazzagatti's house by 1 a.m. tp his house so bad his "stupid mustache" will wilt with horror at the sight!

not in ny

Im not even going to comment because I am across the country. But 90 percent of you idiots arent saying if you are in NY or not. WOW!

FUCKING MORONS!

Over the Top Part 2...Coming Summer 2009

Peaceful negotiations have been made, the two mighty backwoods powers have forged an alliance with a deep stare. The frequent hunting trips may finally resume.

"moments later Sylvia made a wrong move and the young boy had no choice but to knock the Maine-iac out"

"How does taste my tattoo-oo?"

Lesnar creates an awkward silence by telling Tim he's "built like a black man". Lesnar attempts to lighten the mood with the chorus of Sweet Home Alabama. Out of desperation, Lesnar extends his palm and asks Tim, "How does taste my tattoo?"

Algebra Fuckers!!!!!!!!!!!!





BROCK = Vinegar


TIM = Water
+
___________________

(take a wild guess)

Tym:" Watch for his armbar he broke my arm with it"

Brock: I'm not worried about it, I wont break a leg over it"

Brock: "Ahh..Arm bar SchArm bar"
Sylvia : "Pft..Knee bar Schknee barr"
Brock: "Did we just become best friends"
Sylvia: "YUP!"

Photographic evidence that there was a time when someone looked up to Tim Sylvia.

can't make NY... I'm just posting for the love of the game..errr...the tee shirt

Brock addressing Sylvia.. "I Ioved you on Blind date"

The first day of taping for

Pitchmen, Appalachian consumer edition.


I cant make it to NY, and I never did get my hall of fame shirt from the "Never Surrender" caption contest. Wot the ehf mates?

"How long have you suffered with man-boobs?"

The longest emotional "I know how you feel" moment ever documented.

gimme a pound-
lock it down-
break the pickle-
tickle, tickle-
a classic greeting for homophobes and KO Junkies.

Brock lesnar coming face to face with his greatest fear, the swamp troll.

Brennan: Did we just become best friends?!
Dale: YEP!

I won't be in NY.
Also, "DILLON! YOU SON OF A BITCH!" is my favorite.

Brock : "Just wanted to shake the hand of the biggest mistake in UFC history."

Tim : "Me Too"

Brock: Hey man, I know someone in the WWE if you are interested...
Sylvia: Oh Great! Thanks man, I don't think I am cut out for this real stuff anyway.

Brock: See that chick to my left? I say we beat up those faggots and then take her for ourselves.
Tim: No problem buddy, just let me get my throwdown music ready.

Tim: A palm tickle and Brock's digits, Sweet!

Tim: Hey man good luck on saturday
Brock: Hey?? thanks
Akward moment
Brock: You look fimular
Tim: Really?? You know me?
Brock: HOLY FUCK its the dude from blind date, hey did that alcoholic bitch ever call you back??

Brock: "Yeah man! My ringtone's 'Tiny Dancer' too!"

-------------------------------------------------------------

"One, two, three, four -- I declare a tumb war."

nice to meet you tim, but are you sure the only way that cell phone works is if your touching another man, this is a little uncomfortable?

Tim: thats what the guy who sold it to me said, although it doesnt work with frank mir.

Brock Kilmer: You can be my wingman any time.
Tim Cruise: Bullshit. You can be mine.

NYC

maine-iac: hey brock! i just got the message from ken shamrock that i can be your tag team partner.

Brock becomes angry when he realizes Timmy really did use him as a reference for his WWE application.

So, you're sure I can borrow all your fans and you dont have any more than these guys?

Brock: Hey Tim nice to meet ya Say I'm throwing a party at my ranch next weekend, Was wondering if you'd wanna stop by? It should be a doozy!

Tim: O yea sounds pretty good

Brock: yea theres gonna be a whole lot of Eatin, Drinking, Fuckin and fighting!!

Tim: Really! gonna have alot of people out there huh?

Brock: Nope just you and me

Sorry I don't have a passport

"Brock, buddy, Im leavin man these t shirt guys are gonna pay me a bunch of money to fight some guy named Fedor. Can you become the biggest jerkoff in the UFC?"
(Brock waits and gauges the crowds reaction and then in true heel form clocks Sylvia in the back of the head. Mazzagati takes a point, and Brock leaves never uttering a word)....
I live in NY send me

The African-American man in the background stands uncomfortably as he senses a plan between two rednecks has been formed.


Not in NY.

Brock was visibly upset when Tim started off their arm-wrestling match with a leg kick.

Hey, Brock, just got a text from Marc Mero: "How taste my pee pee?" I think he meant to send this to you...

We haven't seen a meeting of the minds this powerful since the Treaty of Versailles!


Not in NY.

Before Tim could say anything, Brock gently put a finger to Sylvia's soft lips, whispered, "I know, big man, I know," wiped away a tear, and left.

Brock: Seriously though, should I use spermicide to clean that belt?

Wait, Brock, let me get this straight: You're bigger, stronger, and younger than Randy Couture, yet you still managed to beat him? Unbelievable. Can I get your autograph?

Tim: "Good luck against Big Noog"

Brock: "Good luck against Murr"

"HEY!!! I was champ too and i couldn't fight for shit either! We should make a club!"

As these men came together the room filled with the fragrance of fresh flowers and vinegar. Everyone then realized that the the 2 biggest douches on the planet had collided together and released a cloud of freshness that only a woman should know.

(nowhere near NY)
(I would take an outdated HOF shirt though LOL)

Tim: "Man, you could totally beat Frank Mir just like I....fuck."

Former UFC Heavyweight Champion Tim Sylvia shakes Current UFC Heavyweight Champion Brock Lesnars hand after being given Vince Mcmahons phone number.

-

Lives super close to Radio City, wants to go and is broke!

Upon meeting for the first time, both men at the same time think "So beautiful - should have sent a poet"

"Shiiiiit- I'd take 'em both out if this chick and Mr Peacock-hair weren't in the way."

"Dude, you're acting like someone's going to submit this to a website that has written articles mocking your tattoo, entrance music, and work ethic in the hopes that its viewers will mock you even more. Do you honestly think that's why I want my picture taken with you?."

Former UFC Heavyweight Champion Tim Sylvia shakes hands with Current UFC Heavyweight Champion Brock Lesnar after realizing they are long lost brothers.

...

Lives super close to Radio City, wants to go and is broke!

The Unholy Alliance to Destroy Frank Mir ended abruptly when the would-be supervillains couldn't agree whether their uniforms should have long sleeves or no sleeves.

Holding onto Lesnar's hand is the closest Sylvia will ever get to wearing UFC gloves again.


Not in NY.

I wish I knew how to quit you.

Wow, so the UFC gives you custom-made gloves? Um...think I could get a pair? I spent the last of my Fedor money on these cool Fairtex wraps, and I'm still waiting for my Mercer check.

Brock then realized that he was staring right into his future.

"Hey Tim, remember how I used to call you a fag in high school? Well, Mayhem Miller just called..."

Anyway, would you mind telling Dana I said hi and to give me a call? I don't think his secretary has been giving him all the messages that I left.

"Yea, just eat like me, you'll be 300 lbs of muscle in no time, Tim."

"Shake and Bake"

Tim: You know that belt you won from Randy?
Brock: Yeah. What about it?
Tim: I totally had sex with Patrycja Mikula while wearing it!
Brock: Is that why it smells like pig fat and chlamydia?

Now Showing: Freaky Friday II : A former pro wrestler turns UFC champion while a former UFC champion should turn pro wrestler

Tim Sylvia. S-Y-L-V-I-A. I knocked out Tra Telligman and Gan McGee. Telligman. McGee. M-C... Know what? Never mind. I'll just leave.

brock-"Man i heard what happened in alabama.."

Tim- "Ya i just got your text....Some bad neegros down there man...dont ever go down there"

According to the betting lines, Tim Sylvia is -325 underdog to win the interim heavyweight thumb wrestling belt.

Tim Silvia thinking : ''Wow, that's a pretty strong right hand shake you got there Brock. No wonder you have a phallus on your chest''.

You think Mazzagatti sucks? Herb Dean once stopped a match just because Mir broke my arm.

After an emotional hour of sharing their fears and feelings, the only 2 members of the "Frank Mir made me his Bitch" support group look into eachothers eyes and share one last embrace.

So...could I get Vince McMahon's number? I don't mind doing freak matches with weird rules, and the steel plate in my arm is a great gimmick. I could be the next Iron Mike Sharpe.

Goldberg: It appears as if Lesnar is going for some sort of submission!
Rogan: No, there is nothing there, he needs control of four or more fingers.

Tim: " I loved you as The Swede in Heartbreak Ridge! could you sign my mouthpiece?"

Brock: Wierd that I'm holding you up now after merely making contact with you....does this happen often?

Tim: "Good to meet you Mr. Lesnar. My name is Tim and I will be your driver today".

Brock: "Nice to meet you Ti..."

Tim: "Hold that thought, I have to take this call..could be important".

Tim: "Heck yes I'd like to save $20 a month on my long distance".

No. Seriously. Get the fuck out of my dressing room, you fat fucking goof.

Tim realized too late that without a baseball cap to turn backwards, he could never beat Brock at arm wrestling.

Zuffa gets a head start on filming the next season of Ultimate Fighter.
Thank god only one of them can make it into the house

Brock: Oh man Tim is HUGE! I actually look quite tiny compared to him! (Thinks this to himself)
Tim: Hey man...
Brock: Hey, nice to meet you man...
Tim: This man is tiny! I thought he was this HUGE guy! He looks huge on TV! (Thinks this to himself)

Is that mike tyson behind me? i'm not lookin'. did you see what ray mercer did to me?

Oh my gawd...


These are all so good! EVERYONES A WINNER


....group hug!!!!

With Brock and Tim both indoors, deer everywhere were able to breathe a sigh of relief.

Tim instantly regretted that he agreed to appear on another episode of Blind Date.

I'm tellin ya bro, you get a kick-ass sword tattoo like mine and NOBODY will make fun of your weight again!!!

Ben vs Ben: The Manly Macho Hetero Edition

(nowhere near New fucking York)

Brock: Hey, I bet ya if we combine our skills, and host a 2-on-1 tag team cage match... we could probably beat Frank Mir!

Tim: This isn't the WWE

@Koeikan

New Favorite, made me giggle a bit.

wayy out in oregon..

Thanks for keeping my belt warm for me, Brock

haha

@ Huberite

this pic is from when they bet on who can grow the gayest facial hair.

loser gets a dick tattoo'd on their chest and the winner gets plenty of spam and mayo sandwiches.

Finally, Vikings and Sloths can co-exist peacefully.

Guy to chick in the backround: "I've got $50 that says Brock KO's Tim with just the handshake"

Brock: "So we're clear, right? I don't like your stupid accent. Write that down in your little notebook."
Tim: "I don't hav- "
Brock: "Well, remember that, then."

Sylvia: "let me get your number, maybe we can hang sometime?"

Brock asks: First Michael Jackson died, then Billy May's... you MUST be next in line, right Tim?
Tim replies: Why because i'm famous, just like them?
Brock laughs and says: No, because nobody likes you, just like them.

So, when does Nogueira get here?

LOL

Damn...already an XARM reference. Hmm....

"In hindsight, the late Tim Sylvia made 2 crucial mistakes:
First: He made eye contact with the Lesnar.
Second: He made physical contact with the Lesnar.

Despite his intentions, these (and all other forms of communication) are seen as acts of aggression by the Lesnar.

Shortly after this photo was taken, the Lesnar pounced and Tim Sylvia was later found hammerfisted to death in an alley, naked."

Brock: How ya doin'?
Tim: I'm all right.
Brock: Goose is dead.
Tim: I know.
Brock: You fly jets long enough, something like this happens.
Tim: He was my R.I.O., my responsibility.
Brock: My squadron we lost 8 of 18 aircraft. 10 men. First one dies you die too, but there will be others. You can count on that. You gotta let him go. You gotta let him go.


NYC

BL: "I'm soooo down on going halves on Never Land Ranch!"

TS: "Yeah dude, i hear they got animals big enough for us to ride, elephants!"

*In Ny

Brock: And yet, I'm still the one they always ask about doing steroids. Sigh...

Frank beat you again hahaha... welcome to the club!

"This is what it sounds like when doves cry"

Tim: Wow you do have a big hand, you know what that means. But I will need some proof.

Lesner:
zziiipppppppppppp flop

Tim: oh my god your a tripod.

(If I win I will drive to NY for this)

Do you know what a BEAR is , Timmay? (strong island, 40 min. on the train)

No Tim, I don't think Dana will let you be the celebrity ring girl.

Silvia, "Okay, let me introduce you to the future of sports, it's called XARM, and you hold my hand like this, and... wait, let me finish this text, and I'll just show you."

Lesnar: 'So you got knocked out by an old dude, big deal - I knocked myself out trying to do a shooting star at Wrestlemania!'

Brock: "I always preferred the buttocks, it doesn't hurt as much as you would think when you stick it in there."
Tim: "We are talking about steroids, right? ... I mean you do have a giant penis tattooed on your chest"

(lives in Brooklyn)

When an immovable blobject meets the irresistible farce

^My favorite thus far

Sylvia: "It's just a hug bro .. "
Brock: "This handshakes more than enough fagget"

Sylvia: " I just rented Moulin Rouge on dvd, you should come hang, we can talk about hunting and guns and stuff" *giggles and smiles*
Brock: "Moulin Rouge on dvd? I can bring over the Big Buck Annual set circa 1992, get this party started off proper"
Sylvia: "Man, you are gay"

Sylvia: " I just rented Moulin Rouge on dvd, you should come hang, we can talk about hunting and guns and stuff" *giggles and smiles*
Brock: "Moulin Rouge on dvd? I can bring over the Big Buck Annual set circa 1992, get this party started off proper"
Sylvia: "Man, you are gay"

Tim Sylvia and brock lesnar get together to discuss tims next fight...a bra and panties battle royal with the WWE divas

Lesnar: So I guess you didn't actually taste his pee pee...
Sylvia: You smell delicious, by the way.

Tim Silvia's thought bubble:

"That tattoo's making my mouth water. Does that make me gay?"

(I live in NYC)

Everyone: "Ready to form Voltron!"

Brock: "Activate Interlock."

Tim: "Dinotherms Connected."

Brock: "Infracells Up."

Tim: "Megathrusters are GO!"

Everyone: "Go Voltron Force!"

"Hello, and welcome to the Future Has-Beens of America. Here's your card. Take a seat over there. A receptionist will be right with you."

What's the matter? Affliction got you pushing too many pencils? Huh? Had enough?

Brock: "Although my feelings on the homosexual lifestyle are well documented, I know you tasted Andre's pee-pee inadvertently. Let's hug it out, you big lug."

*not in New York

"Who would have known that this meeting would lead to years of fighting enormous turtles for Bee-Bop and Rock Steady."

(NYC resident)

After a long and painful session of group therapy, Tim forgave Brock for eating all the Cracklin' Oat Bran, and Brock forgave Tim for going on and on about whacking it to the Sable "Playboy". The rivalry was truly buried.

"So, how does taste his pee pee?"

Brock's inner monologue when first meeting the Mainiac: "This man is a Giant! Wowy Zowy! buttt...does heee have a sweet sword tatto on his chest like me?
Brock: "Hey Ti..(gets cut off)
Sylvia: "your chest has a penis on it.."
Brock: "Are you hitting on me?"

Brock Lesnar stares into the Abyss. And the Abyss stares back, saying "What, me worry?"

“Nothing important (talking about working at saw mill)"

Only queers wear sleeves.
Write that in your little notebook.

Brock: He can't hurt you anymore. You're protected. This is a safe place.
Tim: ( Just before breaking into tears) Thank you... Thank you. I'm just tired of getting hurt...in under a minute each fight .

Sylvia- "Kneebar huh?"
Lesnar- "Ray Mercer huh?

I won't be in NY either :)

Lesnar tests out the now healed arm of Sylvia and is perplexed when he finds it is made of pudding.

I am not going to be in NY

Little did Tim know that the deer meat and mayonnaise deal he struck with Brock would be Mercer's first good fortune since the unfortunate cage fury tap out.

"Thanks for the advice Big Timmy, I'll remember not to tap next time....you're definitely sure that's a good idea"

1,2,3,4....I declair a thumb war!!!!!!! GO!

DILLON! YOU SON OF A BITCH!

Lesnar: Timmy! Nice to meet you, heard so muuch about you! Just caught your fight with Frank. . . Mann oh man you were really took it to him. Any tips on how you beat him the first time?
Sylvia: Umm...ahh.. Well.. umm...

Tim Sylvia-"You made the right decision shaving those pubes off your chin Brock."
Lesnar-"Yeah, you're right Tim."

@Acrocerid

I swear I posted before I saw your Xarm reference.

Hell yeah I've got time for a pickup game of Xarm. Loser has to shoot something for dinner?

XARM just got a hell of a lot more interesting.

brock's inner thoughts

"not even a cock on his chest could help this pathetic fucking fat body"

First! Bow down, my little giblets