Steroids in MMA
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Misc. - Page 116

BREAKING: Tito Ortiz Shot Dead While Trying to Protect Kidnapped Family

I know, I didn’t hear about this either! But apparently there was a Turkish movie released last year called Kurtlar Vadisi Irak (“Valley of the Wolves Iraq”), about a group of Turkish soldiers who try to get revenge for a series of atrocities committed by Americans during the occupation of Iraq, and Tito Ortiz was in it. He’s actually the only American character with a conscience; the film also stars Billy Zane as a sadistic Army commander and Gary Busey as a Jewish-American doctor who harvests organs from injured Iraqi prisoners to sell to rich people in New York, London and Tel Aviv. In one scene (shown below), the survivors of a raid on an Arab wedding are being driven to Abu Ghraib prison via shipping container, when Ortiz’s character complains that the captives may be suffocating. His partner shoots the container full of air holes. When Ortiz threatens to report to incident, he is shot. Watch, if you must:

With a budget of $10.2 million, Kurtlar was the most expensive Turkish film ever made, and it was a box-office hit. To put that in perspective, the most expensive American film ever produced was Spider-Man 3, which had a budget of $258 million. So, nice try Turkey, but you’re not even close! Holla when you can hang with the big dogs…


Trash Talk: It’s So Hot Right Now!


“I’m not sure that he would be a contender anytime soon. I don’t think he would beat Rich Franklin. He certainly wouldn’t beat Anderson Silva or Dan Henderson. Not sure he’ll make a big impact.” — Jason MacDonald on Michael Bisping’s drop to middleweight

“I guarantee you that if I would have fought Silva both times in the UFC, I would have won. Not [because of] the cage, [because of] the referees. I guarantee I would have beaten him.” — Quinton Jackson on Wanderlei Silva


Karo Parisyan: He-Man Woman-Hater


Karo Parisyan, who most recently bored us to tears at UFC 78, embarrassed himself again while appearing as a guest on Friday’s episode of Inside MMA. During a discussion of women’s MMA, Karo threw in his two drams:

“Look, I know all the women are going to hate Karo Parisyan now, but the cage is not for women…I mean, Gina Carano is a very beautiful girl. I don’t know why she wants to mess her face up to get in that cage. For me personally, I do not want to see any girl get in the cage and fight…Can’t they do one thing that guys do and they don’t? Just one? Give me a break. They do weight-lifting. They do wrestling. Not MMA, please. It’s too brutal for women.”

Parisyan went on to lament how, in glorious nation of Armenia, women are now allowed to ride in inside of bus.

For his blatant sexism, Karo’s punishment should be to watch this terrible commercial in a continuous loop for 24 hours straight. Parisyan also becomes the first recipient of CagePotato’s “Ortiz Award”, for his outstanding achievements in referring to himself in the third-person like a complete fucking jerkoff.

(Props: MMA Junkie)


Aw man…

Can’t the WEC provide a box for the bantamweights to stand on when Frank Mir interviews them?



Guida’s Hair Even More Terrifying in Person


“I was hurt. He rocked me, man. I was slightly knocked out but I knew what was going on. I just heard this ringing, and it was the weirdest thing, all I saw was all this hair, I didn’t know if it was a human being or a lion attacking me, then after about 10 seconds I was like ‘Hey Clay’ and it was back on.” — Roger Huerta, to Yahoo! Sports


The Other Half

Hatton sees (and wears) stars

This holiday season I am thankful for friends with real jobs, nice apartments, four-foot HDTV’s, and pay-per view. Aside from TUF’s finale, there was a quaint little boxing match between the infinitely humble Floyd Mayweather and Bedazzled British brawler-slash-sequin-model Ricky Hatton. Pretty much everybody I talked with wanted to see Floyd shitting his teeth out by the 6th round. But he fought a great match, paced himself, and proved that he is (unfortunately) the best. I know, this is an MMA blog. But we have to admit that the sports coincide. Here’s some topical analysis from Bloody Elbow.

MMA is vying for the space that boxing has occupied for years. The popularity of TUF proves that it’s only going to be more and more mainstreamed. Rumors have even popped up that CBS might be airing UFC81.

In other news, don’t forget that Versus is taking time out of their stellar line up to give us this one. Should be good. I envison a future where the popularity of MMA yields to a sport that involves clones of Randy Couture in unarmed combat against 1500 pound amphetamine-fueled bulls. Ultimate Bull Fighting Championships. We’re going to copyright that.


“I’m not out there to ruin Andre’s career.”


Model/party-host Patrycja Mikula visited Jarry Park today to chat about MMA and her relationship with BF Andre Arlovski, and to answer accusations that she’s a distraction for the Pitbull. According to her, she isn’t. In fact, she’s completely supportive, even going as far as cooking and cleaning for him.

Damn, Andre’s a lucky man. You’ve haven’t experienced true joy until you’ve had a Polish lady clean for you…


“He have said a lot of bad thing about me.”


Jarry Park posted a 14-minute interview with Georges St. Pierre last night, covering hockey, stardom, and his upcoming fight with Matt Hughes. Sure, GSP’s colorful accent may be hard for Americans to keep up with, but the interview is worth checking out just to hear him stammer when Ariel brings up Sean Sherk’s steroid conviction. Comment ça se dit “Nandrolone,” mon ami?


Houston Alexander in Interview Shocker


“The Assassin” in an interview with about his UFC 78 fight against Thiago Silva:

“It’s not like I don’t know any jiu-jitsu, because I actually do and I’m actually really good at it.”

‘Scuse me? The dude was as confused on his back as my ex-wife. But he did shed light on how he maintains his famously jacked physique:

“The day starts about 5:30 in the morning; I get to the gym about 6. We do a lot of conditioning, loosing up, simple stuff in the morning like a lot of sparring, stretching, and endurance stuff. Then after about an hour and a half of light conditioning I’ll take the kids to school. Then I go back to the gym at about 10 and work out for another hour and a half, do some light lifting, sparring, techniques, a little bit of everything…I do a lot of circuit training, a lot of dumbbells, a lot of pushups, sit-ups, general stuff. There’s no big secret, just a lot of pushups and sit-ups in different forms, a little bit of everything…I throw tires up the hills – heavy diesel tires up the hills. A lot of people will throw them in parking lots but we like to throw them up hills. The bigger tires, the tractor tires, we flip. We do a lot of sprinting too, a lot of vertical jumping, and a lot of stuff to strengthen the legs It’s actually a lot of basic stuff that anybody who’s training should be doing, besides throwing the tires, or hammering tires.”

In other words, quit your day job and don’t sleep. Live near a hill. Raid a junkyard if you have to.


Ben Saunders on Property Destruction


“I wouldn’t say it’s encouraged, but [the producers] told us how extreme we could go. They just didn’t want us breaking windows or burning down the house or anything like that. I don’t understand all the negative attention about it, honestly. I see a lot of people complaining. Some of these guys on the show were even saying it’s disrespectful and things like that. In the back of my head, I’m like, ‘What are you talking about?’ People build houses 10 times the size of that house just to blow it up for movies and stuff. This is a TV set. This is how we look at it. This isn’t someone’s house. As long as it’s fixable, it’s not really a big deal. You put 16 fighters in one house with nothing to do — and then they give us alcohol after losing fights and stuff? Well, stuff’s going to happen. Most times it isn’t done to entertain the people watching at home. It’s done to entertain ourselves because we have absolutely nothing to do in that house.”

Source: MMA Junkie