infomercial fail gifs
21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Misc. - Page 3

The Unsupportable Opinion: MMA/The UFC Is NOT Slowly Swirling Down the Shitter


(MMA’s heyday, according to at least one guy.)

“The night is always darkest before the dawn.” — Two-Face, quoting Plato or some shit.

MMA is facing a crisis, Nation. Or so we’re being told. Not one of irrelevance, a lack of funding, or societal ignorance like it faced during the so-called “Dark Ages,” but one of complacency, of apathy. Over the past several years, we have seen the sport rise to a level of popularity we previously thought unattainable. With more major network deals, cross-promotion with major brands, and movies featuring UFC stars popping up by the day, it’s hard to argue that MMA is exactly struggling to generate interest amongst fans.

But somewhere between the death of Strikeforce and the Fight Pass subscriptions, MMA (or at least, its premiere organization) reached a tipping point. Despite an ever-burgeoning roster, the quality of the average card started to slip. Viewership began to decline. Truly “stacked” cards started to come further and further between, as did the number of marketable stars present on them.

While the UFC was busy making efforts to dominate the fucking world, its stateside presence slowly began to diminish with each lackluster “Fight Night” card, the majority of which have been spread across three channels and subscriptions-only networks. It isn’t helping that the UFC is now nickel and diming those of us hoping to watch their international events and prelims, adding to the growing “UFC is in trouble” sentiment among fans. The UFC has gotten greedy, and our view of the sport has slowly begun to shift from optimistic to apathetic as a result.

Is it simply a case of the UFC expanding too fast and oversaturating it’s niche market, as many followers of the sport will tell you? Or have fans simply lost interest in the sport now that it has become a globally recognized, increasingly expensive commodity?

Actually, the answer is a firm “no” to both of those questions. MMA is NOT rapidly descending into the watered-down, passionless, corporate-sponsored hellscape we all think it is, and everyone needs to man (or woman) the fuck up and stop acting like the sport is a lost cause.

Read More DIGG THIS

Melvin Manhoef vs. Cyborg Santos II Has Been Booked, So Let’s Celebrate By Watching Their First Slugfest [VIDEO]

Melvin Manhoef is so explosive that his leg kicks destroy everything including Melvin Manhoef. Evangelista “Cyborg” Santos is such a fearless badass that he willingly and repeatedly stuck his Elmer Fudd in Cristiane Justino‘s rabbit hole (do not click this link to confirm). So obviously, when these two met at Cage Rage 15 back in 2006 with Manhoef’s light heavyweight title on the line, the result was every bit the epic slugfest that fans had predicted it would be.

For nearly ten minutes, Manhoef and Santos traded heavy leather and heavier kicks and knees, leaving both men gasping for air before the second round even got under way. It wasn’t until a flurry by an exhausted Manhoef finally found its mark that Santos was defeated, marking an insane fight in the Cage Rage books and a ridiculously improbable comeback win for Manhoef.

And now, the two are set to do battle once again (*BRAAAAHM*). MMAFighting is reporting that Santos and Manhoef have agreed to meet in a welterweight contest on April 13 in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. The fight will not only serve as Manhoef’s debut at 170 lbs, but as a title match for the vacant Gringo Super Fight welterweight belt. A prestigious achievement if there ever was one.

Although both guys have fallen on harder times since their original battle — Cyborg has gone 7-7 since and Manhoef 15-9 — there’s simply no way that this fight will leave a bad taste in the mouths of those who have witnessed the mayhem depicted above. I can only pray that we will be able to say the same about Shogun vs. Hendo II come March 24th.

-J. Jones

Read More DIGG THIS

Yushin Okami to Face the Complete Opposite of Yushin Okami in WSOF Debut


(Savov poses with his Bulgarian pop star girlfriend, Desi Slava, while Okami can only crysterbate into a box of tissues offscreen.)

After signing a multi-fight deal with World Series of Fighting back in October, former UFC middleweight title challenger Yushin Okami finally has a date set for his promotional debut.

If you recall, Okami was released from the UFC last September (to make room for the Jumabieke Tuerxuns of the world) despite going 3-1 in his last 4 fights, because whatever, fuck you. “Thunder” was quickly snatched up by the WSOF but has been sitting on the shelf ever since his signing for reasons unknown. Regardless, it was announced earlier today that Okami will make his promotional debut against Bulgarian Svetlozar Savov at WSOF 9 on March 29th.

With 11 finishes in his 12 victories, Savov is pretty much the antithesis of Okami, who collected just 4 stoppages in his 18-fight UFC career. That being said, expect Okami to come in as a huge favorite here. Not Cormier vs. Cummins huge, but somewhere around that. Thankfully, this squash match will likely slip completely under the radar once Rousimar Palhares inevitably maims Steve Carl in the evening’s main event.

Seriously, I cannot begin to comprehend why the WSOF is essentially rewarding Paul Harris for his repeated acts of douchebaggery in the cage by giving him an immediate title shot — it’s like giving a convicted arsonist a book of matches, a gallon of kerosene, and the keys to the home of the judge who sentenced him. “Tickets got to be sold,” I guess.

-J. Jones

Read More DIGG THIS

Friday Link Dump: Belfort’s Mysterious Random Drug Test, Weidman Opens as 2-1 Favorite Over Machida, Eight Damn-Near-Impossible Video Games + More


(If you’re a Fight Pass subscriber…let us know how this fight turns out, alright? / Props: YouTube.com/UFC)

- Results of Vitor Belfort’s Random Drug Test Will Not Be Released Unless He Does so Himself (MMAFighting)

- Can Anybody Explain This Conor McGregor Billboard on Sunset Strip? (MiddleEasy)

- Zak Cummings Missed Weight So Bad That His ‘UFC Fight Night: Macau’ Match Was Canceled (BloodyElbow)

- Chris Weidman Opens as -210 Favorite Over Lyoto Machida in UFC 173 Title Fight (MMAJunkie)

- Matt Hughes: Georges St. Pierre Doesn’t Want to Come Back to UFC and Take Another Beating From Johny Hendricks (MMAMania)

- More Still Needs to Be Done in Struggle Against PED Use (Yahoo!)

- 2014 Oscar Nominee Childhood Photos (WorldWideInterweb)

- The 50 Greatest NBA Plays of the ’90s (Complex)

- 10 Ways to Cancer-Proof Your Life (MensFitness)

- Dazzle Your Oscar Party With These Printable Bingo Cards (Crushable)

- Eight Scripts That Should Have Never Made It to the Big Screen (EscapistMagazine)

- 20 Things That Happen When You Don’t Wear a Bra, In GIFs (TheGloss)

Eight Utterly Frustrating Video Games That You Could Never Beat (HolyTaco)

- Dana Snay Loses $80,000 with “SUCK IT” Facebook Message (EveryJoe)

- The Complete Cheat-Guide to ‘Thief’ (Gamefront)

- The Funniest Autocorrects of February 2014, Part One! (DamnYouAutocorrect)

Read More DIGG THIS

Brazilian Commission Bans TRT, Grants Dan Henderson Final Exemption for Shogun Rua Rematch


(In his pre-TRT days, Hendo never went to a football game without bringing a grill full of sausages. Nowadays, he’s relegated to carrying the glass dish of potato salad to the wine and cheese parties he attends with his wife. Getting old sucks. Photo via Combat Lifestyle.)

On the heels of a monumental decision by the Nevada State Athletic Commission to ban TRT exemptions, it appears the Brazilian Athletic Commission will be the first to follow suit. Vitor Belfort retirement status: Imminent.

But before the commission puts the kibosh on TRT entirely, they will first grant Dan Henderson their final exemption.

Henderson, of course, faces Mauricio Shogun next month in a rematch of their epic clash at UFC 139. On the heels of a first round knockout loss to Belfort at Fight Night 32 (the first of his career) and currently riding a three fight skid, a win is not exactly make-or-break for the 41-year old Henderson — who just signed a six-fight extension with the UFC — but crucial if he wants to remain in the highly coveted UFC top 10 rankings (*armpit fart*).

The news of Henderson’s exemption was passed along by CABMMA Medical Director Marcio Tannure to SporTV, who also informed the outlet that the ban will affect one Chael Phinneus Sonnen moving forward. Not that “The American Gangster” cares.

And with that, Dan Henderson becomes the first man to ever receive a TRT exemption in Nevada, and the last to receive one in Brazil. It’s as close to a poetic moment as we’re going to get in this damn sport nowadays.

-J. Jones

Read More DIGG THIS

There’s a Bellator Event Tomorrow, So Rampage Jackson Is Talking Nonsense Again [VIDEO]

As someone who recently told Dana White to “keep my name out of your mouth,” Rampage Jackson sure seems to have a problem granting the UFC the same courtesy. In a recent interview with Fight Hub TV, Jackson previewed his Season 10 LHW tournament semifinal fight with Christian M’Pumbu headlining tomorrow night’s Bellator 110, citing a few changes in his training camp as the keys to beating the former Bellator champ.

It was going, so well. Jackson was calm, reasonable, and had managed to go almost four minutes in a row without dry-humping something. But us MMA reporters being the shit-stirring type, the conversation inevitably shifted toward towards “Bellator vs. UFC,” prompting Jackson to go completely off the reservation.

At the end of the day it’s all about what you’re looking for. If you want longevity, I would go with a company like Bellator that you can grow with. And here’s a secret that the UFC won’t tell you, and will never tell you, but right now Bellator is getting more ratings than the UFC. And sponsors understand stuff like that. So a lot of sponsors are going to come over and jump to Bellator and UFC sponsorships are going to go down because if you don’t have the ratings you don’t have the commercial money and the people to watch the commercials and you don’t have the endorsement dollars. 

(*puts on Madea costume*) Oh Rampage, you so crazy!

Read More DIGG THIS

Today in Head Kicks: Ryan Ford Goes ‘Silva vs. Belfort’ at WSOF Canada, and a Women’s Muay Thai Bout Ends With a Lawn Chair KO [VIDEOS]

Major props are in order for CP reader Lewis Scott for passing along this video of British women’s Muay Thai world champion Iman Barlow’s latest fight, which went down in Melton Mowbray, UK last weekend.

Those of you not familiar with Barlow should know that despite being just 20 years of age, she is a multi-title holder who has compiled over 130 fights since making her professional debut when she was only twelve years old. Riding a three fight, three decision win streak into last Saturday’s match with Maritzarda Hersisia, Barlow came out aggressive and looking for the kill, which she would find a minute into the second round via a beautiful right high kick.

Hersisia crumpled to the mat in classic lawn chair fashion, and Barlow walked off with her latest championship — the 2014 Golden Belt World Title. Check out the vicious KO above, then follow us below for the big highlight from last weekend’s WSOF Canada event.

Read More DIGG THIS

A Brief History of the Insane Sh*t Nick Diaz Has Said in Interviews [w/Reaction Gifs]

It’s a testament to Nick Diaz the fighter that Nick Diaz the person can continue to make headlines with his ridiculous statements despite retiring from the sport almost a year ago. Or maybe it’s a testament to the nadir of journalism present in today’s MMA landscape, but in any case, Stockton’s finest is once again attempting to use his retirement as a bargaining chip, telling Fox Sports in a recent interview that he would consider returning to MMA, but only for an immediate title shot:

I don’t care, I’m talking about a title fight matchup. Bottom line, I’m the only draw here. Bottom line. We had like the third biggest [pay-per-view]. That wasn’t just because of Georges St-Pierre. And these guys aren’t doing that. People want to pay to see me fight, they want to see someone get knocked out or someone get tapped out, or they want to see me get my ass whooped like they’ve been waiting to see but they still don’t get to see.

I’ve been fighting for 11 years. I already did all those [contender] fights. I don’t have to take a warmup fight. Why would I take a warmup fight? To help somebody out? To bring them to my level? I’ve already been through all that and you still didn’t see me take an ass whipping.

While Dana White has publicly squashed this notion already, MMA fans and pundits alike have already taken to hyping the “inevitable” return of Diaz to the UFC. Because like the man himself said, he is a draw. That doesn’t change the fact, however, that Diaz’s understanding of how one achieves a title shot is absolute nonsense.

Come to think of it, the statement above is just the latest in what has been a career filled with borderline insane ramblings on Diaz’s part. Join us after the jump to see what we mean…

Read More DIGG THIS

Arianny Celeste Calls Ronda Rousey a Poor “Role Model,” Immediately Poses Nude on Hotel Balcony


(F*CK YEAH, FEMINISM!)

UFC ring girl Arianny Celeste and UFC women’s bantamweight champion Ronda Rousey have a lot in common in that they’re both women who have posed nude before. And while one of them is a former Olympian and the other is a former Ring Girl of the Year winner (2x!), it appears that the latter isn’t too high on how the former carries herself.

Yes, the woman whose breasts nearly destroyed CagePotato back in 2010 recently sat down with MMAJunkie radio (not nude on a hotel balcony, as previously speculated in this article’s title) to plug her show, Overhaulin‘. After a thirty second discussion about her social media presence that felt four hours long, the conversation eventually shifted to whether or not Celeste felt that Rousey was a good role model for our nation’s yoots. Her answer was so deeply profound that upon hearing it, Deepak Chopra allegedly threw his hands in the air and declared his life a sham:

I don’t really like the way she carries herself. I don’t think she’s a good role model for women. I think that women should empower each other and give each other a little pat on the back. (Ed. note: Or sometimes, a kiss on the backside.)

She’s paving the way for women’s MMA, and I’ve made being a UFC Octagon Girl into a career. She should definitely recognize that and be nice.

“The key to being a successful fighter…is being nice.” — Arianny Celeste

Read More DIGG THIS

Friday Link Dump: The Unwritten Rules of MMA Gyms, Anderson Silva Off Crutches, The Return of ‘Wolfenstein’ + More


(Skate-face is the new punch-face. See more at Break.com)

MMA Gyms Abide by Many Unwritten Rules, And Cummins May Have Broken a Big One (MMAJunkie)

TUF Nations Episode 6 Nets Just 78,000 Viewers (MMAPayout)

Anderson Silva Walks Without Crutches in Latest Injury Update Video (BleacherReport)

Actually, Fighter Sponsorships *Are* The UFC’s Problem (MMAFighting)

Sexy New Work from MMA Stunner Justine Davis (Babes Of MMA)

How Always Being Busy Makes You Dumber (FastCompany)

8 Reasons Nicolas Cage Is The Best Actor Of His Generation (EscapistMagazine)

15 Times Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Boobs Totally Stole The Show From Her (Crushable)

Watch What Happens When a White Guy and a Black Guy Commit the Same Crime, Minutes Apart (PopHangover)

27 Photos of Hattie Watson, Tattooed Hipster Goddess (HolyTaco)

Wolfenstein and Doom Return in May! (GameFront)

10 Upcoming Movie Remakes You’ll Actually Want to See (Teen)

Sochi Wolf Dog was a Fake: Jimmy Kimmel Wins Again (EveryJoe)

The 20 Funniest Moments In Cheetos History (WorldWideInterweb)

Read More DIGG THIS
CagePotatoMMA