(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

Here we are, three weeks away from the big Fedor Emelianenko-Brett Rogers Strikeforce fight in Chicago, and CBS is starting to put some of its promotional muscle behind the event.  But here’s the problem: how do you hype a guy who most Americans have never heard of when he doesn’t speak much English and you don’t own any of his fight footage?  You basically have two choices: you can show him working out while flashing various quotes about how great he is, or you can film a commercial where he fights an entire pride of lions in the big cement pit behind Vadim Finkelchtein’s house.  For reasons that I’ll never quite understand, CBS has decided to go with the first option.  Whatever.  They’re the ones who’ll have to live with that regret.

All things considered, CBS is making the best of a tough situation, but here’s my question: if you don’t already know who Fedor is and why he matters, will you know enough about who Jay Glazer, Stephen Quadros, and Randy Couture are for their quotes to mean anything? 

It’s like when you see an ad for a movie that includes decontextualized praise from some website or (possibly fake) news outlet that you’ve never heard of.  It does nothing to make you go see that movie unless you’re the kind of sad-sack who sees absolutely everything anyway.  And if you are that kind of person you probably won’t stay home to watch "Saturday Night Fights" just to see some chubby guy hit a tire with a sledgehammer.  At least not with "Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant" opening soon.