(Victory!)

Despite Jeff Monson‘s commitment to anarchy and breaking stuff, the American legal system cut the wandering MMA fighter some slack recently, dismissing the charges against him for the grandfather clock-bashing domestic dispute he got himself into back in January.  

As you’ll no doubt recall, Monson was arrested for “assault on a female” and “damage to real property” after an argument with his then-girlfriend, Stephanie Trapani, who had just found out Monson was still married and also playing the hell out of the proverbial field.  She threw his cell phone out the window of her moving car, so he smashed her grandfather clock and her computer, and even allegedly put his hands on her.  Though Monson only denies that last charge, the court apparently decided to drop all charges against him last week after ruling that the case had been “misclassified” and Monson had been improperly held.

Monson was understandably pretty pleased about having the charges against him dropped, telling Sherdog:

“I made the mistake of breaking her clock and her computer, but I never touched her.  I never actually made physical contact with her. …It’s just not in my character to do these things.  It’s been hard on my family. It’s been on hard on me. The allegation was completely unfounded and untrue.”

The allegation of assault, maybe.  But am I crazy or did he just admit to doing damage to “real property” right before saying it wasn’t in his nature?  Sounds like that charge was dropped because the police screwed up the handling of it and “improperly” held him for five days while it was classified as a domestic assault incident.  But dammit, that won’t put Stephanie’s grandfather clock back together.

Speaking of the scorned ex-girlfriend, her charge for destroying Monson’s cell phone was also dropped, but she allegedly “used his bank card and security code to empty out his account without his knowledge,” which is felony identity theft, right there.  That charge wasn’t dropped, so she might end up in more hot water than the crazed anarchist pro fighter after this altercation.  That’s almost an accomplishment.

Of course Monson still has to face vandalism charges for defacing the Capitol Building in Olympia, Washington, and he also has to finish kicking himself for allowing an ESPN photographer to document that vandalism.  He’s due in court on that bad boy in mid-August.