Chuck Liddell's Two-Step Fails to Knock Out the Judges on 'Dancing With the Stars'

(Props: PROMMA)

Traditionally performed by drunken rednecks, the two-step was supposed to be right in Chuck Liddell's sweet spot. And still these goddamned bloodsucking judges criticized his lack of grace on last night's Dancing With the Stars. Fine, so he was more of a prop for Anna Trebunskaya in this round, but at least he got to lift her over his head a couple times. (Check out the 0:43 mark during the training montage; I'm sure it took a tremendous amount of self-control not to power-bomb that chick through the basement.)

In the end, the Iceman's skill with a lasso and ability to take a head-kick weren't enough to win over the so-called "experts," and he ended up with a score of 17 (just like last week), putting him near the bottom once again; Michael Irvin and Louie Vito tied for dead-last with scores of 16. Let's put that in perspective: Even if Cecil Peoples showed up as a special guest judge and added a perfect 10 to Liddell's score, he'd still have one less point than Melissa Joan Hart and Mya. Whatever the dance-studio equivalent of American Top Team is, Chuck needs to go there immediately and start expanding his toolkit, because the younger, hungrier celebrity dancers are closing in, just waiting for a chance to make their names off of him.