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Can we put all the street fighting nonsense aside? These are professional fighters we're talking about. As Kimbo himself puts it, "This is how we eat." While I can't speak much towards EliteXC, the UFC would never allow Chuck Liddell to fight Kimbo outside the octagon for any reason. Period. And let us not forget, that inside the octagon, these men would fight in different weight classes. I don't care what anybody says, Kimbo slice could no more cut down to 205 appropriately than fly to the moon. And Chuck Liddel is not a heavyweight, and would not be for any reason. So let's talk about some heavyweights...

First, Kimbo slice would get twisted and submitted by Frank Mir probably faster than did Brock Lesnar. Lesnar was a 265 machine when he entered that fight, looked highly athletic though unskilled, and Mir still roped him into a textbook knee bar. Slice has dropped to about 235 now that he's training for real and has lost some street fat. Did I mention that Frank Mir has two inches and twenty pounds on Slice? This fight would be an unfortunate joke, like Mir-Lesnar.

Since we're in fantasy-land, and since the UFC would likely avoid a repeat of Mir-Lesnar, let's compare Slice to a brawler, neo-phyte like Lesnar himself. Again, Slice is listed at 6'2" and about 235. Lesnar stands over 6'4" (no matter what the stats say) and weighs the maximum 265. Right off the bat, the usually physically out-classing Slice has been physically outclassed. As for fighting skills, while we haven't seen Lesnar's chin tested, Lesnar has a head like a cinderblock and likely can take a punch. Second, I don't care how much Slice's ground game has improved, Lesnar has both elite wrestling skills and animal power. Lesnar-Slice would be a better match up, but Slice would be handled. Don't like Lesnar? Consider Heath Herring...

For the sake of fantasy, let's consider Nogueira-Slice. Nogueira cannot be knocked out - not by Tim Sylvia (who is still rated #5 by this site, Slice is unrated), not by a speeding dump truck, and not by Slice. He has so much scar tissue on his head, it's like wearing a football helmet all the time. Without further analysis, Nogueira could eat all the punches Slice throws at him and still submit him without effort. Nogueira might even knock Slice out. See: the Sean Gannon fight. Gannon, by the way, has a UFC contract.

One final comment about Slice and professional MMA. With all the credit to Slice for trying to legitimize himself, there is one lesson he has yet to learn - true professionalism. This kind of thuggery is fun for thugs, but not for professional fighters or their fans. See: Charles McCarthy getting knocked out after sticking his tongue out to Michael Bisping. See: the sportsmanslike display of both fighters after Serra-St. Pierre 2. While a little trash talk is fun, and everyone does it, calling out fighters you are not capable of fighting, on an internet video no less, is not MMA, it is WWE. It is Terrell Owens. It is unprofessional. The UFC, and validation for Slice, likely wait with open arms if he could just drop the act and fight.