(VidProps: UK Telegraph)

Just a tip, P-Nation: Next time you need to make an important first impression – whether on a first date or a job interview or that guest spot on The Bum Rush you’ve been hoping for — give some serious consideration to affecting an English accent. Essentially, sounding like you’re from across the pond is guaranteed to add a few points to your IQ and hey, it’s working for Dan Hardy. I know this sounds shallow, but something about listening to Hardy break down his upcoming UFC 120 opponent Carlos Condit in his lilting, Nottingham-art-school accent makes me think: “I’d definitely hire this guy.”

Now, we already know this is an illusion. We know that Hardy’s thin veil of smarts falls away in short order when he has to commit his thoughts to pen and paper. In fact, if I had to throw out a blind guess (and you know I will) I’d say Condit would probably best Hardy in most any battle of wits. Unfortunately, the battle of sounding cool when you say shit is already a totally one-sided slaughter in favor of the Englishman.

Not even that ridiculous mohawk can make Hardy look stupid as he describes Condit as “quite rangy” – if there’s a daily quota on using the word “quite” Hardy blows it out of the water here — and then details his plans to “throw him about” when the pair of mid-card welterweights meet in the cage in London on Oct. 16. 

“His best quality is his relentlessness, I think, his persistence,” Hardy tells Gareth Davies here. And speaking of stuff that makes you sound smart, you can’t do much better than being named ‘Gareth.’ “He’s quite tenacious. Quite meaning not as tenacious as me and I think that’s where he’s going to fall short. His tenacity is going to get him in a lot of trouble. He’s going to try to want to push the pace of the fight and every time he steps forward he’s going to run into something heavy or sharp.”

I assume when he says that he means punches and kicks, but listening to Hardy talk for a minute and thirty odd seconds make you wonder if he wouldn’t be better served to slap Condit across the face with a white riding glove and challenge him to a duel. My personal favorite exchange comes at the 1:18 mark in this video, though again, seeing it written down doesn’t really do it justice.

“Are you going to be very clinical in this fight?” Davies asks, sounding pretty much like the authority on the subject himself.

“Very,” Hardy responds, because what’s he gonna say? No? “Clinical and nasty. I’m going to bully him, push him around, throw him about.”

Even when Hardy is taking potshots at the face Condit makes when he walks to the cage, it somehow sounds more refined.

“Skinny guy. Tall, pale, dark hair. Screws his face up before a fight …,” Hardy says when first asked about Condit. “He’s quite rangy, he’s not a bad kickboxer. He’s quite persistent, he likes to grind away. He’s not bad on the ground, he’s got quite a few submissions. He likes to fight off his back off the ground.  Quite busy. That’s about it, really.”

All told, it sounds as though Hardy has things well in hand here, so long as Condit doesn’t introduce any of The Dark Arts (like, you know, wrestling) to the equation. Of course, that wouldn’t be the proper move for a sporting chap, now would it?