Steroids in MMA
Which MMA Fighter Will Test Positive For Steroids Next?

CONTEST: UFC Fighters and the (Fictional) Crimes They’ve Committed

(Alistair Overeem — Animal Cruelty & Beastiality, for starters.)

In order to avoid hiring a third fighter with alleged Neo-Nazi ties (see: Brinsa, B. and Sailing, B.) down the line, the UFC quietly implemented a new background-checking policy earlier this week, handing out questionnaires that asked both newly-signed and veteran fighters to┬ádetail their educational and criminal backgrounds, as well as their medical history. It was an undoubtedly smart move on the UFC’s part, and one that was likely brought about by the firing of Will Chope back in March and the media circus that followed. (For context: A “media circus” in the MMA world = More than 4 non-SB Nation sites devoting an entire article to an 0-1 UFC fighter.)

In any case, the idea of seeing Dominick Cruz‘s three-year long health insurance scam finally exposed (that’s what all this has been, right?) got us thinking: “What other crimes have UFC stars likely committed?”

Think of this as a caption-contest of sorts: Pick a fighter and a crime that is most likely to be dug up when the UFC does some investigating into said fighter’s background. A few examples:

-TJ Dillashaw — Theft (of Renan Barao‘s soul)

-Daniel Cormier — Assault of a Senior Citizen

-Roy Nelson — BurglerKingary

Write your funniest answers in the comments section of this article, on our FB page, or tweet them at us with the hashtag #UFCcrimes.

The only entry limit is the comedic abilities of your feeble, pathetic minds (MWAHAHAHA!!!). We’ll decide the winner on Monday, June 2nd and hook you up with some certified CagePotato swag of our choosing. Get to it!

-J. Jones

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