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Cris Cyborg Reign of Terror to Resume in Strikeforce

Toughest fight for Crisitane Cyborg so far? Contract negotiations.

Many, many, many moons ago, movie makers were looking to make a sequel to the live action Masters of the Universe movie starring Dolph Lundgren, and film it in North Carolina. Auditions were held for childrens’ roles in Wilmington, and i was one of many (i assume) kids who tried out to be in a movie with He-Man. Alas, the film company had some financial difficulties and the project was scrapped; i never got another chance to be Macaulay Culkin before Macaulay Culkin. The film company had already spent something like 2 milllion dollars producing costumes and sets for the movie, and wanted to re-purpose them to recoup some of the cash they’d put up, so they banged out a script about a dystopian future of plague and anarchy, hired Jean-Claude Van Damme, and that’s how the movie Cyborg came about. All that is 100% true, by the way.

I tell you that because i have no idea how Cristiane Justino Venancio Santos came into existence, although if you told me 2 million dollars, He-Man, surgical bionics augmentation, and JCVD were involved, i’d believe you. Cyborg is just that scary.

Well, just when you thought it was safe to go back to Strikeforce as a 145 pound woman, FullContactFighter is reporting that Cris Cyborg has renewed her contract with the company, and will return to smash any and all comers starting as soon as the find women crazy enough to fight her.

Details are non-existent at this time, simply a report from Santos’ manager/trainer Master Rudimar Fedrigo that negotiations finally panned out, money was agreed to, and the Strikeforce Women’s Middleweight Champion is back under contract and ready to destroy.

Still no word on why Gina Carano pulled out of her last fight.

**  UPDATE: MMAjunkie reports that Strikeforce is unable to confirm that Santos has re-signed. So……yeah.


Cagepotato Comments

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xianjianab- July 11, 2011 at 12:00 am
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KingZipperhed- July 8, 2011 at 1:33 pm
No,No,No,No,NOOOOOOOOOOO Mila didnt date Macauley!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No,No,No,No,NO!!!!!!!! Someone please tell me thats not true PLEASE!!!!!!!!!
Its ok king that meatball is a fucking liar!!!!! She knows we love her, she would never do something like that (pulling hair out one by one, slowly so the pain feels good)
Spicymeatball- July 8, 2011 at 12:50 pm
Since we're on the subject of Macauley Culkin lets give some love to the Home Alone kid. The dude got to date Mila Kunis, much respect.
pietaster- July 8, 2011 at 10:14 am
I wanna see a pic of that chick she fought last time two days after the event. I bet she was pretty messed up
RwilsonR- July 8, 2011 at 8:30 am
In the picture, Cris Cyborg and Evangelista Cyborg are celebrating their new ability to marry in New York. Congrats to the couple... I know it has been a long time waiting for this day.
RwilsonR- July 8, 2011 at 8:26 am
Not to worry Rex... you may have missed out on the childhood stardom of Macauley Culkin, but you grew up to be just as awkward.
intercept440- July 8, 2011 at 8:05 am
@yazloz if he was turned around he would be making a gagging noise
Fried Taco- July 8, 2011 at 8:01 am
Skinny girls are very rare in Brazil. If they're skinny, they're probably not a real girl.
Yazloz18- July 8, 2011 at 7:57 am
I wonder if her penis is jabbing him in the back of the head up there
Machiavelli- July 8, 2011 at 7:41 am
Sure wish she had someone to fight. How many Brazilians are there that weigh enough for the 145 division. All I ever see are the skinny bikini clad variety.
danomite- July 8, 2011 at 7:19 am
Rex has inspired me to go audition for children's roles in Piranha 3DD.
FrontKick Dentist- July 8, 2011 at 6:51 am
Cyborg's testosterone level is higher than Nate Marquardt's.