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Famous Last Words: Toney More Worried About Potential Murder Charges Than Couture’s Takedowns

(Letting James Toney wear four-ounce gloves? Sounds like contrapment to me. PicProps: SBNation)

We’re not sure if this meets the legal burden for proving premeditation, but boxing champion James Toney says he’s liable to kill (yes, literally kill) Randy Couture next month at UFC 118 if he hits him while wearing MMA gloves. Oh, and as for Couture’s takedown prowess? Lights Out’s not even sweating it.

“Everybody asks ‘How are you going to defend the takedown?’ I’m not worried about that. How are you going to defend these punches?” Toney told MMA Weekly in an interview published on Saturday. “I’m going from 10-ounce gloves to four-ounce gloves. If I hit someone with four-ounce gloves, oh my goodness, me and my crew might go to jail for homicide.”

Now, I’ve never been arrested for murder but I’ve watched my share of episodes of the First 48, so there’s one thing I know for sure: Do not say a word to the police, James. Not a fucking thing. Once they get you in the interrogation room, just ask for your lawyer and then shut the fuck up. Otherwise, these meddling cops will start putting words in your mouth. Start asking you, ‘Did Randy Couture have a gun?’ saying ‘We know you had a good reason, James, just tell us what happened,’ or they’ll get some lady detective to come in there and hold your hand and whisper sweet nothings in your ear. Next thing you know, you’re wearing a paper jumpsuit and riding in the back of a Crown Vic all the way to the death house.

But I digress. Remember those reports from a few months back that Toney had been training with King Mo Lawal and Dean Lister to get ready for the ground game? Seems like maybe Toney didn’t get the memo about that. He tells MMA Weekly that you’ll see the same old James Toney when he makes his debut in the Octagon. You know, the James Toney who’s tested positive for steroids twice since 2005 and can’t find a promoter who’ll pay him worthwhile money to show up for a boxing match, even though he officially holds two small-time heavyweight title belts? That’s the one.

“I haven’t changed a thing,” Toney says. “You’ll see. I’m here to prove a point, so people know that boxing is still running supreme over any discipline out there … I haven’t changed nothing. I only added a few things to my roster of offensive skills. You’ll see come Aug. 28.”

Toney – who asked for a fight with Brock Lesnar and turned down one with Kimbo Silce because it would’ve been like “kicking a little kid’s butt” — reiterated that he felt disrespected when Couture called him out. He also made reference to Couture saying he wanted to “break Toney’s leg.” If in fact Couture actually did say that (I don’t recall it and couldn’t find it online), Toney says it was the worst mistake he ever made.

“Now we can‘t be friends, you know what I‘m saying?” Toney says. “You disrespected me by saying something like that. Now all gloves are off. Anything goes. I hope he comes to fight (and doesn’t) try to hug me like a little girl like he usually does.”

One word, JT: Lawyer. That’s all you say. Lawyer.

Cagepotato Comments

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Under Banga- August 2, 2010 at 1:55 am
QEENSFUCKINGLANDER ! don`t you mean?
fatbellyfrank- August 1, 2010 at 4:08 pm
@ Ballkick, on the Coast just out of Cairns, Undabanga, yeah its on at Midday today, Wifeys recording it for me so I wont be back until I've watched ot tonite,
Cheers dudes
serendipity- August 1, 2010 at 3:46 pm
My take is there are many ways that Randy wins this fight, as he should, however I must admit I have a few concerns and it will boil down to the gameplan Randy goes in with.

1) Randy likes to be, and fights the best as the underdog. His mma 'credibility" rides on him readily punishing JT and everyone knows it.
2) A submission win from Couture is as unlikely as the falcon punch power it would take to conjure up a clean KO on Toney. No doubt Couture has good submissions but I dont see him going for an armbar or triangle since he will be on top on the ground and not want to chance a reversal. The RNC seems likely except that it would be like trying to choke a water buffalo. Maybe JT will tap just to get a sweaty Couture off of him and get an oxygen mask on but Couture has to get there first and it could take a round or two, or three to do it. I suspect that JT eats punches like cupcakes so minimum round two to get the TKO for Randy...

My point is I keep seeing Randy clinching up against the cage and getting his jaw disconnected like a boa constrictor via ryu uppercut from JT.

If Couture shoots the double and beats him up for three rounds he wins this fight 100 times out of 100.

If Couture stands and trades like he does sometimes, and might on account of personal and industry pride, JT has a chance.

If Couture clinches to grind down JT, JT has a chance.

Holy shit I hope Randy doesnt get ktfo. I want him to humiliate JT, just a little bit, and then they should let JT fight Brock anyway.

I cant stand Brock but him and Toney fighting would be hilarious. It would look like a silverback gorilla tackling a tourist at the zoo and hulk smashing them into oblivion. Priceless.

BTW Im new. Sup.
Ballkick- August 1, 2010 at 9:07 am
No worries i get dates mixed up too, some of my fighters thought the freebee was yesterday too.
Things been good, downed a whole bunch of Crown Royal and Coke Zero's all afternoon after the gym yesterday,...and continued well into the night,...was a friends B-Day.
Finally reached a level of maturity that allows me to pace my drinking without suffering for it the next day.
Headed to gym again today to hold pads for a couple of my rookie fighters....then Toss back the rest of my Crown to watch the fights tonight.
BTW where exactly do you live? are you near Winton, Longreach? or further west?

@the glza
every time I read some quote from mumbles I do that very thing,.......facepalm.....he drives me crazy with his delusional BS.......I really hope Randy's Camp are working on cutkicks and teebs,...Mumbles needs to feel the force of a well placed cutkick. I think it would be brilliant to kick the shit out of his legs,...he wouldn't even expect it or have trained for it. Oh and he wouldn't have the excuse that it was "gay" (his words not mine) man hugging that lost him the fight.
There is just "so many" ways to beat this fool.
the glza- August 1, 2010 at 7:50 am
@fbf & ballkick
rlh61- August 1, 2010 at 7:30 am
@mo and fuckers made my morning. Still f'n laughing. Bravo, gentlemen...bravo.
Under Banga- August 1, 2010 at 4:35 am
amber lamps even !
Abidon- August 1, 2010 at 3:25 am
Quick someone, get the Amber Lights!!!
Under Banga- August 1, 2010 at 1:43 am
Fark Frank
It should be on chan one HD tomorrow midday.I too am in sunny Qld .
Too fuckin bad I aint got HD ,oh well over to MMA @$^%&&&() .com after to check out Bonesey deconstruct Vlady.
Cheers from Down unda
Bing bang .....
fatbellyfrank- July 31, 2010 at 10:48 pm
fatbellyfrank Says:
Sun, 08/01/2010 - 09:34
@ Ballkick, cheers mate, how ya been keepin anyway bro, Its free fight day here in Sunny Queensland and life is gooooood
Fuck I hate it when i get the dates wrong, free fight day is tomorrow, fuck, I'm gonna have to record it. Had to drink all the brews I got in for the fights as well, Sunday Afternoon and I'm fucken wasted again
Fuck i'm an Idiot, but Dana, get all fights on Saturday nights, or fucken ass up cunt

Seoul Brother- July 31, 2010 at 6:57 pm
Hey Gambling Addiction Enabler,

What's the over under on the following:
1) Mush Mouth craps his shorts when Randy chokes him out.
2) Mush Mouth pisses hot.
3) Mush Mouth tries to go "Paul Daley" on Randy.
MoTropolis- July 31, 2010 at 6:18 pm
Coming from you fbf, thats means more than any T-shirt I may or may not receive from CP.

In all honesty tho, I did receive my fight mag subscription, mad props!
fatbellyfrank- July 31, 2010 at 6:03 pm
MoTropolis Says:
Sun, 08/01/2010 - 10:29
JT needs one of those scrolling LED signs hanging from his neck on a chain, and somehow program it to run sub titles of all the bat shit thats leaks out of his head.
Bwahahahahahahahahahahahah, theres been some fucken good shit here lately, but Mo, the bat shit that leaks out of his head had me doubled over and gassin out from laffin +100
Seoul Brother- July 31, 2010 at 5:37 pm
How much of a shitfit do you think Mush Mouth is gonna throw when he weighs in above the agreed-to weight and must forfeit part of his purse? I mean, the alternative is that he cuts weight quickly, and that ain't gonna be good for what's left of his cardio.
MoTropolis- July 31, 2010 at 5:29 pm
JT needs one of those scrolling LED signs hanging from his neck on a chain, and somehow program it to run sub titles of all the bat shit thats leaks out of his head.
mt59801- July 31, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Given his history I'd say post fight steroid testing will be his 2nd major challenge in the world of MMA. He has a lot of power and head movement, but he's also fought a lot of cans in his time. He did beat holyfield the bottom his game and he doesn't do to well when someone's hands are faster(RJJ) so I'm guessing he's gonna eat leg kicks and knees like a mother fucker.
fatbellyfrank- July 31, 2010 at 4:34 pm
@ Ballkick, cheers mate, how ya been keepin anyway bro, Its free fight day here in Sunny Queensland and life is gooooood
Ballkick- July 31, 2010 at 4:07 pm

I would suggest we've gone way past that point already

Wayyyyyyyyyyy past that point

+1 fbf
fatbellyfrank- July 31, 2010 at 3:58 pm
the glza Says:
Sun, 08/01/2010 - 03:58
i'm gonna love watching this guy get gnp'd to the point where he can't ever speak coherently again.
I would suggest we've gone way past that point already
vengful1- July 31, 2010 at 3:30 pm
“Everybody asks ‘How are you going to defend the takedown?’ I’m not worried about that. How are you going to defend these punches?”

With takedowns idiot.
Lysol- July 31, 2010 at 3:15 pm
I understand how he thinks Randy Couture's fighting style is feminine. What I don't understand is how he thinks his bracelet isn't.
ghostboner- July 31, 2010 at 2:58 pm
James Toney is so gangsta that when he threatens to kill someone in the ring, Dana doesn't make him apologize.
ComaPlata- July 31, 2010 at 2:43 pm
I may be a traitor but, my money is on JT. "Why would you do that Coma?!?" one might ask. My answer is simple... Did you see the line on this fight? Cha-ching!
Ballkick- July 31, 2010 at 1:50 pm
OMFG...JT...STFU!....Just STFU!...please! got nothing but punches, and a big fucking mouth. I wish Randy was more of a leg kicker,....Muay Thai style, wouldn't be walking for 2 weeks,...STFU!....FUCKTARD!
Almost North- July 31, 2010 at 12:26 pm
Apparently the strategy for getting daily articles about you on CP is either be mind-numbingly boring or just engage in some batshit hyperbole every time a camera crew gets within 400 yards.

I'm looking at you Shields, Sonnen, and Toney.