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Five More Things That Dana White Would Be Pretty F*cking Stupid Not to Do

By Jason Moles

As soon as Joe Rogan put the mic in Chael Sonnen‘s face for the customary post-fight comments at UFC 136, it hit us: Sonnen is clearly the best trash talker in the history of the sport.

Everyone watching went bananas as “The American Gangster” challenged the pound-for-pound king, Anderson Silva, to a ‘Loser Leaves Town’ match. At that point in time there is nothing MMA fans wanted more* than to see that fight happen, Dana White included.

USA Today recently caught a word with UFC President Dana White where he told them that he “would be pretty f*cking stupid not to book Silva vs. Sonnen 2.” It seems that Captain Obvious has reared his head once again to the delight of almost everyone.

This got me thinking about other things that, if left undone, would make Dana White pretty f*cking stupid. Keep on reading below and put me on blast for being a TUF Noob in the comments.

Roll Out the Official UFC Rankings

What do the NFL, MLB, and NBA all have in common? Besides lockouts. That’s right! They all have an official ranking system so that we the fans know who has the best shot at taking the crown.

The UFC has no ranking set in place, which causes everyone to second-guess matchups and the reasoning behind it. This is especially troubling when a championship is at stake. Can you imagine Roger Goodell sending out a press release announcing this year’s Super Bowl would feature the New England Patriots and the Detroit Lions without us first having witnessed firsthand that both teams have beat the best and actually earned a shot at the Lombardi Trophy? Of course you can’t – it just wouldn’t make any sense. Hell, I’ve seen the Lions play all season and I’m still not convinced that aliens aren’t just playing a nasty trick on the Motor City faithful.

Jon Fitch is the poster boy for why rankings should be instituted in the UFC.  Here’s a guy who has racked up a five-fight win streak since losing to GSP back in 2008. Is he “in the mix” as all the cool kids like to say? Nope. As long as he puts winning ahead of entertaining, he’ll always be on the outside looking in.

Fitch had this to say about the way title shots are handed out. “Where we stand with the sport right now is, we haven’t yet clearly defined whether we are a sport or entertainment. I think at times matches are made that clearly define us as a sport then other times they make matches that are purely based on entertainment.” Can’t help but #cosign that one.

Recently news broke that Lyoto Machida would step in for an injured Rashad Evans against Jon Jones. Not only is does another #1 contender (is there really such a thing?) not get his rightfully earned crack at the champion, but he has recently been outspoken towards the UFC’s lack of an official ranking system. Which brings me to the next thing you’d have to be f*cking stupid not to do…

*Make Jon Jones vs. Rashad Evans Happen (Preferably for the title)

This bout is every promoter’s dream: two well spoken, sharply dressed, highly skilled, friends-turned-enemies fighting for the championship belt. According to some in the media, we would have gotten our Christmas present a few weeks early at UFC 140 when light heavyweight champion Jon Jones may or may not have been set to defend his title against former champ Rashad Evans on December 1oth had it not been for a lingering thumb injury.

Dana promised to make up for UFC 112 last year, teased us with Anderson Silva vs. GSP, Nick Diaz vs. GSP, and now Jones vs. Evans.

I am of the opinion that UFC 140 could have been headlined by almost anybody else and still done well because it’s in Canada – they love this stuff. Jon Jones should have been given the holidays off to spend time with family and heal up like he wanted to which would have given ‘Suga’ more than enough time to heal his wounds and get ready for the task at hand.

I suppose that Zuffa would like to milk this cash cow for everything it’s worth which might entail a stint of The Ultimate Fighter’s first season on FOX for the two frenemies, but I’m impatient and want instant gratification. This fight needs to happen sooner rather than later if only to make up for all the empty promises that have been made to us in the past. Speaking of things Dana White has said, but then went back on….

Create a Women’s Division in the UFC

Mr. White and company have led the world’s most prominent mixed martial arts promotion to the promised land of network tv. With every market tapped except one, the UFC has done quite well for itself. However, for true MMA fans, the Octagon is not a one-stop shop.

Women’s MMA has a few moderately well known names, and at least a handful of women who could help fill dilapidated fight cards if needed. These talented fighters have impressive finishes and big time sponsors. Look, we’re not asking for them to headline events or even that women occupy more than one fight on every card… we just want to be able to watch the best fighters, regardless of gender, fight in the promised land that is the Octagon.

Initiate a Comprehensive Drug Testing Program In and Out of Competition

Do you know why everyone laughs at pro wrestling, I mean, besides their zany gimmicks and over “selling” each and every open handed strike? It’s their steroid-fueled, freakishly large bodies that reminiscent of something created by Stan Lee. Oh, and that whole “predetermined” thing too.

If you think the average Joe knows the difference between sport and sports entertainment, think again. “Fixed” and “Fake” are two of the most popular words associated with MMA and the UFC more specifically. Getting a third party to administer random drug tests will help erase any doubt that mixed martial arts is a legitimate sport and further itself from pro wrestling in the minds of fans.

Mixed martial arts needs full blown drug testing to prevent cheaters from ruining it and doing unnecessary harm to the fighter’s body. The Chief of  US Anti-Doping Agency calls the drug testing in mma a joke. Let’s have MMA be known as a forward thinking company and test all fighters under contract regularly, with and without prior notice, for HGH and PED’s whether they are getting ready for a fight or not. Period. This will significantly reduce the chances of any more Nate Marquardt-like scenarios from happening from here on out.

Lastly, and I think I speak for everyone when I say “Dana White would be pretty f*cking stupid if he didn’t…

Free CagePotato

This is easily the most obvious and monumental decision Dana White needs to make. has a handful of guys who eat, sleep, and breathe MMA. We’re the biggest UFC nut-huggers of all time; just ask the fine folks who leave us uplifting words of encouragement in the comments section.

Your fans absolutely loved seeing us at the Fan Expo in Boston and continue to support us by making funny signs to get your attention. We messed up. We apologized. Whattaya say, Mr. White, free CagePotato? Please.

Cagepotato Comments

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ramiro15- October 16, 2011 at 9:47 am
Hi,Jason Moles
Brilliant, just what I needed to know, thank you!
As I follow tacfit program, I can realize it.
Canadian Bacon- October 14, 2011 at 11:39 am
Rankings would never work, how would you calculate it? Wins/Losses?
Do they get reset every year? Or do veterans that have more fights get ranked over these up and comers? (Travis Fulton > Big Nog > Cain?!)

What if a fight was a robbery or it was the result of a controversial stoppage? (Sherk vs Dunham)

I don't see any other combat organization (kickboxing, boxing, mma) that utilizes a ranking system and theres a good reason for it; it won't work. Its the the way it is. Are people seriously mad about "fights that dont" matter? Are they not entertained by fights that really won't have any championship ramifications? Watch UFC Live: Kongo vs Barry and then get caremad over how "NO TITLE IMPLICATIONS"
zhmmbb- October 14, 2011 at 9:27 am
Top UFC service for the sex women,welcome to vist
Jason Moles- October 14, 2011 at 6:23 am
@bobothecane - Major sports have rankings BASED ON stats, as should MMA. Your W - L record should dictate your standings. Or Maybe fights should get ranked based on Wins, Losses, and Fan Interest.
tthriller- October 14, 2011 at 2:34 am
@ Jackal

You made some great points in your comment.

Usually after reading a ridicules article, I have no patience to word out everything on mind.

Thank you much.
tthriller- October 14, 2011 at 2:20 am
Women MMA is a waste of time.
tthriller- October 14, 2011 at 2:16 am
I couldn't disagree more on all your points besides drug testing.

FYI: Personally don't know a single person who wants to see Rashad vs Jones more than Machida vs Jones.
anderson wanderlei paulo thiago alves silva- October 13, 2011 at 11:07 pm
strikeforce raw and ufc smackdown do it
knightrider- October 13, 2011 at 8:47 pm
Obviously it wouldn't make sense for Dana to aggressively pursue substance testing if he himself is a steroid user. That picture with his "Free CP" shirt on says it all.
Jonny5- October 13, 2011 at 7:00 pm
Women's MMA in UFC??? Me no want.
mr.Buttplug- October 13, 2011 at 5:04 pm
Personally, I think all the pay-per-view is bullshit. I know, that's easy to say in the sense of a a fan who doesn't want to pay... but what other sport (minus boxing) has this system? Going to Fox is a big step, both to gain sport-legitimacy and fans.
XENOPHON- October 13, 2011 at 4:44 pm
You said "That being said, a ranking system would force us to watch another championship with Jon Fitch, a fight I’d never buy and isn’t interesting at all."
Do you think Fitch is going to go away? If there was a ranking system he would have long ago had his day, and if he didn't win, he would have already been pushed back as a gatekeeper.
My guess we will see him fight soon...and for free so you won't have to pay through the nose.
XENOPHON- October 13, 2011 at 4:29 pm
Fox gained control the day they forked over $900 million to Zuffa, even if in partial payment and installments. I wouldn't be surprised if the deal is capped at $900 million, provided the UFC delivers their side of viewer ratings.
That said, Dana himself is on record acknowledging that FOX has changed much of the look and feel of the content that Zuffa built. Why, because FOX doesn't agree to terms that won't ensure they have control over the nearly billion dollars they will spend. I am positive FOX has a plan to make that investment pay a nut that is over many times the fold.
FOX does not just point a camera and shoot....they brand, their brand is FOX, the UFC is the co-brand, its now subservient to the delivery at the last mile.
Be careful when you want to point the finger and spout about conspiracies, madness, false claims. There is an old saying, its the guilty had the points the finger bro.
Since you claim to be in the know, you tell me how you know that after committing to nearly $1 billion dollars, that FOX is not concerned with, or has a hand in "...the matches being made, fighter salaries, or anything."
When's the last time anyone here decided to drop a easy billion, and didn't care how others spent it?

Wait until the first FOX broadcast, and have that notebook handy CCMAN, as there will be much which will be changed, and over the next 24 months, all will continue to see the UFC continue to be morphed into the FOX brand.
bobothecane- October 13, 2011 at 4:15 pm
The NFL, MLB and NBA don't have ranking systems...they have stats not ranking systems...that's the dumbest thing I've heard in a while.
People/media rank the teams in each league, just like people/media rank MMA fighters...not the league's themselves.
KarmaAteMyCat- October 13, 2011 at 4:02 pm
Did you just stand in a Mirror and say my name three times?
(Women's MMA)
I find it almost absurd that so many of you can sit there and talk down about one of Mixed Martial Art's most exciting divisions. Yes women's MMA is exciting and while there isn't a lot of awesome Female fighters on the main circuit yet but I promise you if you dig enough in the underground circuit(Not Strikeforce or Bellator) You'll find a pool of talent like no other. I've said it before and I'll say it Right now again but the most stable of divisions for womens MMA is going to be 125lbs and 135lbs, 115lbs is asking to much of a lot of fighters to cut, 145lbs is just an unreasonable weight class for a lot of women unless their benching weight and eating stem cells with their oatmeal in the morning to kick start their day
Standings, well this is hit or miss because a lot of fighters who deserve to be rewarded aren't just because fans don't like their style. Wouldn't it be just wonderful if we could go with the flow and respect their style of Cagefighting as successful and unique rather then "oh man I wish they'd stood up and banged it out" sorry guys not everyone is Donald Cerrone it's just not going to happen.
Now I forget who it was who said that Evans should retire or something but holy fucking Trolljob from hell sports fans! The fight between Jon Jones and Rashad Evans and Jon Jones are on an inevitable path and it leads to a meeting in the cage which we all want to see. We all want to see this fight because somewhere in the back our heads we wonder what Evans learned about Jones while training with him. We want to see Evans challenge Jones and some us even want to see Jones lose and think Evans could be that guy.
ALl this bullshit aside I am fully endorsing RWR's Ideal for Xarm Combat 1on1... LETS GET IT ON!
MediumRare- October 13, 2011 at 3:23 pm
@RwilsonR: you hit the nail square on the head.
That is the NUMBER ONE thing DW should do.
The worst thing in MMA is the retard judges (looking at you Cecil Peoples). Close second is the dangerous or stupid refs.
MediumRare- October 13, 2011 at 3:20 pm
Rankings system – good idea for a website, UFC won't do it for reasons already mentioned
Jones vs. Evans – captain obvious says, "Of course."
Women’s division – bad idea: they should be making sandwiches
Drug testing – fuck that: make 'roids mandatory
Free CagePotato – no way: the CP ban gives you guys street cred
monkeyknuckler- October 13, 2011 at 2:10 pm
Having a woman's division makes perfect sense.
They could have a woman's TUF season, and make sure that there's a hot tub, a lot of pillows lying around, and a fridge stocked with whipped cream. Ratings would go thru the roof.
ghostboner- October 13, 2011 at 2:02 pm
@RWR Here here bra. The scoring/judging needs to be sorted out sooner rather than later. Tired of seeing shots to the back of the head not enforced, and the 3 points of contact thing is stupid too. What needs to happen:
1. Make clearly defined rules (mostly already done)
2. Enforce fucking rules
3. Fix 10 pt. must system
3. Train some new judges who do not suffer from any form of mental retardation to utilize the new system. Sorry King Mo, no more getting the shit beat out of ya from in someones guard but winning the decision because you were on top.
ghostboner- October 13, 2011 at 1:53 pm
Props for having the balls to stick up for Jon Fish. I would gladly watch Fitch vs GSP every time Fitch runs through the top 3 WWs. So far Fitch vs GSP was prob GSP's best fight.
remeadial- October 13, 2011 at 12:21 pm
1. UFC Rankings - I disagree. While other sports match TEAMS in the playoffs based on wins / losses, regular season they all play each other, much like the UFC. That being said, a ranking system would force us to watch another championship with Jon Fitch, a fight I'd never buy and isn't interesting at all. Having a little color is why sites like Cage Potato exist, there is always something to talk about, disagree with, etc.

2. JJ vs. RE - will happen I am sure.

3. Women's MMA - please God no. To use your faulty logic about comparing our sport to others in the ranking system, please don't subject me to the WNBA. Women don't like watching women play sports, much less beat each other up. There is plenty of MMA for me to watch and every time a women's fight comes on SF or Bellator, I go take a dump. Except for the last Meisha Tate fight, that was excellent.

4. Drug Testing - couldn't agree with you more. But moreover, for the limited amounts of testing we DO HAVE, please enforce them more than a 6 month suspension, Mr. Sonnen. That sends the wrong message.

5. Bring the Potato back Dana!
TellaTruth- October 13, 2011 at 12:08 pm
Not interested in women's MMA in the least.

Initiate a Comprehensive Drug Testing Program In and Out of Competition.

Free CagePotato!
bigvikefan- October 13, 2011 at 11:46 am
There is a ranking system. It's called the Championship Belt. That's all that's needed. Like a great man once said, "If you ain't first, you're last."
ccman- October 13, 2011 at 11:04 am
@ inside, during the Q&A Bonnar and Kos got pretty heated and were actually arguing over what weight to settle their beef at. I think i would like that better than a "just cut my check" griffin v. Bonnar.
ccman- October 13, 2011 at 11:03 am
Xeno, I realize actually entertaining your madness is never a good thing since you will quickly spin into false moon landings and the like, but when exactly did fox gain control of anything? they gained airing rights and flat stated they love the UFC production, they have nothing to do with matches being made, fighter salaries, or anything. they point a camera and broadcast. Make a commercial from time to time since they are now allowed Zuffa fight films to do so.