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Five Things We Want To See In The Next ‘UFC Undisputed’

(If you’re controlling the Japanese fighter against Rampage, just hit down, down, up, X, down to poison his food.)

By Jason Moles

Two weeks ago, fans around the world were delighted to partake in the Ultimate Fighting Championship’s latest attempt to broaden its revenue streams with the release of UFC Undisputed 3. It didn’t take long before word began to spread about just how incredible the game is. But despite all of the improvements and advantages that Undisputed 3 has over the game’s first two installments — such as an improved submission system, a less cluttered career mode, and the inclusion of two additional weight classes and a PRIDE mode — the game just isn’t quite “as real as it gets.” At least not yet. Here are five things that UFC and THQ need to add the next go-’round if they want to put a little truth in their advertising and gain some more street cred among UFC die-hards.

Hat Thieves: If you’ve been watching the sport for any amount of time you will have noticed that fighters love to promote their sponsors with every opportunity they get, from donning their gear to slapping a sticker on everything they wear. Some even go as far tattooing a logo on their calf. One of the easiest ways to rep a company that gives you a paycheck for the exposure is to throw a ball cap on your head on the way to the Octagon…and hope that you still have it on when you hit the Harley Davidson prep point.

Hat snatchers are the lowest of the low, depending on whom you ask, and yet they add a comically endearing bit of chaos to the broadcast. C’mon, admit it. You chuckle every time a hat vanishes into the crowd. Therefore when my created fighter, The Bulldog, makes his way to the cage, I want to see someone snatch his hat. Then, and only then, will I know I’ve made it.

The Ultimate Fighter Online Capability: Think of The Sims if they were all ready to destroy a door or ejaculate on their roomie’s food. You create a fighter, get a few local fights, and hope to pass the TUF tryouts. Survive the TUF house by training and beating anyone that gets in your way and snag a six-figure contract in the UFC. The best parts of the new TUF mode are the coach’s challenges and the down-time in between fights and training. Just think of the fun to be had in the virtual mansion as you hide a dude’s gloves preventing him from hitting the heavy bag later on or sprinkling itching powder on someone’s bed.

Verbal Assaults and Coaching Advice from Belligerent Fans: “Get a room!”, “Kick his ass!”, and “Punch him with your punches!” are all things shouted by inebriated fans. Sure, I can see how you’d think this was a bad thing to add to the game, but just imagine the look on your girlfriend’s face when your fighter is on his back with GSP in full mount showing off his spectacular Lay and Pray. (Yes, this is really a selectable gameplan in Undisputed 3.) As soon as a FOX noob in the stands yells, “Get a room!” she’ll smile and inform you that that was exactly what she was thinking. Is it as annoying as listening to the same questions being asked to fighters by three or four different so-called journalists? You bet. But that’s how the game is played.

Weight Cutting Mini-Game: An optional feature, the weight-cutting mini game before each fight would challenge you to get your fighter on weight by performing a correct sequence of buttons, like dancing in GTA, or hitting the correct buttons at precisely the right time a la Guitar Hero. Each successful button pressed allows your fighter more time in the sauna thus, he has a greater chance of making weight. On the other hand, should you miss weight you will be penalized 20% of your purse in Career Mode and your stats will be impacted negatively in all modes, including online. If you fail as miserably as Anthony “Rumble” Johnson did, you may just get cut from the UFC and demoted to a spot in Supremacy MMA.

Joe RoganCastigation Mode‘: Ahh, Joe Rogan. Is there nothing controversial that doesn’t involve you? Don’t get us wrong, bro, we love you on the stick and your antics are indeed comedy gold, but some of the ish that comes out of your mouth is complete insanity. For better or worse, Rogan will forever be linked to ultimate fighting and some of the crazier things that have happened will forever be remembered thanks solely to the masterful commentary of “Balloons.” I especially love your ‘Spilled Bag of Ice Meltdown‘. In this much-needed addition to the next installment of Undisputed, gamers would be treated to the following:

- Auto-correction of improper Rubber Guard technique
- Referee challenging
- Challenging a fighter’s preparation
- Diamond MMA cup plug
- Mocking fighters who clearly don’t know $%*@ about BJJ
& much, much more!

What do you think? Tell us what you want to see in the next UFC video game in the comments section.

Cagepotato Comments

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MrBlondeSL- March 1, 2012 at 5:23 am
@j.moles, how do I go about doing this? I rented this game the other day and pride mode only had the ufc fighters that had fought in pride and pride only fighters like bob sapp. You mean I can play any ufc fighter in pride?
DanasPottyMouth- February 29, 2012 at 9:35 am
No tattoo is more ridiculous that Adrian Perez's "King of the Cage" tattoo on his head.
Jason Moles- February 28, 2012 at 9:34 am
@ MrBlondeSL: You CAN fight with all fighters in PRIDE mode.
antmaneraser- February 28, 2012 at 2:12 am
I think you should be able to hold out for more money after becoming champ or fight for someone else. You should be able to cycle in steroids if you want. You should also be able to make horrible movies for extra income.
SacrificeTheMinions- February 27, 2012 at 8:13 pm
Nick Diaz should be allowed to fight his opponents in the hospital ala his rematch with Joe Riggs
Todd M- February 27, 2012 at 6:57 pm
Bodog makes Pro Elite look like Malcolm X.
MrBlondeSL- February 27, 2012 at 6:36 pm
Seriously though you should be able to fight with UFC fighters in Pride mode that would be a big step up for the next one.
darkstarrocketship- February 27, 2012 at 3:19 pm
I'm just not crazy about having to pay for DLC fighters like Ubereem.
mmaandrew34- February 27, 2012 at 2:59 pm
stupid article. i would hate the weight cutting mini game. and hat theives is just stupid
CrushCo- February 27, 2012 at 2:38 pm
Yeah, she was part of the "talent" for Bodog Fight. Between her and that horrifically-voiced radio douche whose name I can't recall, they were the most awful on camera pairing in MMA history.
Get Off Me- February 27, 2012 at 2:17 pm
^No, that's the chick who slept with Calvin Ayre and got a spot as a "recruiter" on Bodog Fight series. Pissed Robin Black off as well, he was ready to sleep with Calvin too to get on Bodog.
J. Jones- February 27, 2012 at 2:08 pm
^That's the band who wrote that song "Breakfast at Tiffany's"....right?
CrushCo- February 27, 2012 at 2:00 pm
No love for a Bif Naked reference? Seriously? Bunch of TUF Newbs.
danomite- February 27, 2012 at 1:57 pm
how about a code that enables tito ortiz as a special commentator. or the option to inject steroids in training mode. I'd like to see a rival fighter randomly run into the octagon during your fight with a steel chair like the old N64 wrestling games
danomite- February 27, 2012 at 1:54 pm
how bout dialogue options on post fight interviews and press conferences so you can choose to be a huge dick like Bisping if you want and go into heel mode. after you lose a fight joe rogan will ask you what happened and you get a dialoge box that goes something like this:
I feel like I won that fight. I don't know what the judges saw
I came into this fight with a cracked skull
I think I'm done with this MMA thing
djp1988- February 27, 2012 at 1:42 pm
I want Jose Canseco as an unlockable character.
CrushCo- February 27, 2012 at 12:58 pm
Between-bout performances by $kala & Bif Naked?
ArmFarmer- February 27, 2012 at 12:58 pm
@getoffme The only way I'd be interested in that cheat is if there's also a code that gives arianny a butt.
ArmFarmer- February 27, 2012 at 12:56 pm
Game sucks anyway. I racked up a 50-6 record by abusing the severely overpowered side control. I'm already tired of it. I thought 2010 was better.
If this new version allows for doubledeckers in the tuf house and urinating into fruit platters, I'm in.
Get Off Me- February 27, 2012 at 12:50 pm
How bout a cheat that unlocks nekkid ring girls... we've already seen them all nude anyway.
SethF- February 27, 2012 at 12:44 pm
@Fried Taco
I doubt BSN will approve of the "tainted NO-XPLODE" option...
Chonde- February 27, 2012 at 12:42 pm
All these ideas are pretty good. Especially the Stockton Rules! lol
Viva Hate- February 27, 2012 at 12:34 pm
I believe that the next installment should go beyond just Pride mode and allow us to fight under Stockton rules.
Fried Taco- February 27, 2012 at 12:29 pm
Need to add pre and post fight urine tests, with random positive tests for fighters and the option to choose one of several stock excuses for the positive test.